Having a sexual relationship outside marriage is a sin in itself and God doesn’t approve of that kind of arrangement. However, within marriage, withholding intimacy is one way that a person can be abused emotionally, by using withdrawal to control the other person.
In the sanctity of a marriage relationship, you are not supposed to deny each other. The scriptures say that you should not defraud one another.
Married ladies should not use sex to punish their husbands as that may lead to more vulnerability.
Signs of Abusive Relationships Part 2
9. Words like arrows
Another sign of emotional manipulation is when you are called names, given unpleasant labels, derogatory nicknames, and the use of biting cutting remarks.
Words are powerful and you are what you hear everyday. A guy goes to Medical school, listens to medical classes for seven years and then becomes a Medical Doctor. The same thing with a lawyer.Invariably, you are what you are hearing. You should therefore not allow anybody to constantly pull you down and trample on your esteem all in the name of love.
Love will not constantly put you down! Love will not crush your esteem day after day. If one or more of these signs are prevalent in your relationship, you may need to pause and review it.
Listen to me, marriage does not change abusers. It is better to remain single and wait for the right person than to rush into a marriage with an abuser because of the pressures around you.
When the abuse takes a toll, all the people putting pressure will not be seen around you.
The last day you would see most of them is on your wedding day to eat your food!
As my wife would always says, you will live with your choice!
Signs of Abusive Relationships Part 2
10. Personal information
Lastly, abusers can often resort to using your personal information and secrets against you and to control you. This is why you have to beware of people who are always asking for your nude pictures.
Why would a person who claims to be a child of God be asking for your nude pictures?
There is something perverse about that.
Is it to masturbate or what? Or to sell the pictures? Young ladies, don’t ever send you nude pictures to anyone in the name of love.
He would eventually use your pictures to manipulate and control you, and when you call his bluff, you would find your nude pictures all over the internet.
Several young girls have committed suicide when they couldn’t bear with the shame of having their nude pictures and videos all over the internet. So, don’t ever make that mistake.
Remember the scripture we saw earlier? Your souls has escaped like a bird out of the snare of the flower!
Fly away from all demonic and manipulative relationships.
Pro 6:5 (KJV) Deliver thyself as a roe from the hand of the hunter, and as a bird from the hand of the fowler.
Cut off that relationship where you are being oppressed.Let the wrong person go so that the right person can show up! I pray that God will grant you more understanding!
Let’s delve deeper into these symptoms of abusive relationships:
1. Your Individuality is in Question
In an abusive relationship, one of the most subtle yet insidious signs is the gradual erosion of your individuality. You may start to question your own thoughts, feelings, and actions, as the abusive partner systematically chips away at your self-esteem. They may belittle your opinions, decisions, and passions, making you doubt your worth and significance.
2. Unending Chastisement
Abuse often manifests in the form of unrelenting chastisement. You may find yourself on the receiving end of constant criticism and nitpicking. This continuous stream of negativity can be emotionally draining, leaving you feeling worthless and defeated.
3. False Accusations
Abusive partners frequently employ false accusations as a means of control. They might accuse you of infidelity, dishonesty, or wrongdoing without any basis in reality. These unfounded allegations can leave you in a state of constant defensiveness, further undermining your self-esteem.
Abusers often excel in shifting blame. Instead of taking responsibility for their actions, they find ways to place the blame on you. This tactic leaves you feeling guilty for problems that are not your fault, reinforcing their control over the relationship. It can eventually bother on mental health if care is not taken.
5. Withdrawal
Emotional and physical withdrawal is another common sign of an abusive relationship. The abusive partner may use the silent treatment or physical isolation to exert control and manipulate your behavior. This isolation can lead to feelings of loneliness and helplessness. It is also called stonewalling
6. You Are Always in the Wrong
In an abusive relationship, it can feel like you can never do anything right. No matter what you do, your actions are met with disapproval or anger. This constant feeling of inadequacy can lead to a loss of self-confidence and self-worth.
7. Control Over Your Finances
Abusive partners may also exert control over your financial resources. They might restrict your access to money, scrutinize your spending, or even take charge of your finances entirely. This control can leave you financially dependent and trapped in the relationship.
Recognizing these symptoms is the first step in breaking free from an abusive relationship. If you or someone you know is experiencing these signs, it’s crucial to seek support and help from professionals who can provide guidance and assistance in leaving the abusive relationship and rebuilding a life free from harm.
Giving the right nomenclatures to folks around you is an important step in Latin the right person for you Even after the wedding, naming people rightly will keep you away from adultery. You must learn to name people appropriately and not go out with everybody or jump in bed with everyone and anyone! This is my boss. This is my colleague. This is just a friend! This is just an acquaintance. This is an unbeliever…
Gen 2:20 KJV And Adam gave names to all cattle, and to the fowl of the air, and to every beast of the field; but for Adam there was not found an help meet for him.
Like Adam, you must name people rightly! Not everybody is your helper! Some are nice but they are destiny killers!
There are handsome destiny destroyers and beautiful dream abortionists.
You must name people appropriately and you must not allow desperation to push you out of God’s will!
Like Adam, have you been in that place where no help-meet has been found? Have you searched and prayed and fasted and yet nothing is forthcoming?
You see, you have to cease from your own strength! Your intellectual prowess cannot get a prudent wife from the Lord. Your nice manners and Queens English are irrelevant. The parameter of your cognitive abilities is not the issue here.
Have You Slept Yet?
Adam successfully named every creature on earth, a display of uncommon spiritual and mental energy and prowess, and yet was frustrated at the end because he could not find a spouse!
Are you in that place like you are a graduate, but no helpmeet? You are rich and comfortable, but no helpmeet? You attend functions and join the church workforce and do a lot but no helpmeet. That was where Adam found himself.
What was God’s solution to the imbroglio?
Gen 2:21 KJV And the LORD God caused a deep sleep to fall upon Adam, and he slept: and he took one of his ribs, and closed up the flesh instead thereof;
Guys and ladies, you’ve got to “sleep” and allow God to lead you! Some of you have simply refused to sleep! The scripture said “and he slept,” so it was a choice. He could have said, “I am not sleeping, and just start jumping or jogging.
After you have done all you know to do, why not just sleep and abandon yourself in God’s arms and plans for your life? You have been too much awake and yet no result!
Just sleep and trust God to do it. When you sleep, you don’t wake up every two minutes to check your security. You just sleep. Go into deep sleep and stop sampling ladies all over the place every Sunday! You don’t even listen to messages again in church!
By the time Adam woke up, God brought Eve to him. Ladies, don’t bring yourself, allow God to bring you! When God brings or showcases you, it comes with a revelation or conviction to your husband-to-be. Don’t be suggestive. Don’t sound too available. Don’t take the lead. The man is the aggressor and the lady is the responder!
Have You Slept Yet?
When you “sleep,” God will show you your spouse. He will bring her to you! You will see her and know! That was why, without God saying a word, Adam went into a frenzy of romantic prophecy and began to speak in tongues!
The next time you want to take things into your own hands and step outside His will, remember to step back and go to “sleep!”
Dear married couples, after your wedding, you are supposed to go to “sleep” as well concerning all other people around you You can only admire, and not desire again!
Ask God for the wisdom to go about it! You can still go to sleep even as a married person and wake up with a revelation on how to better handle your spouse and improve your marriage!
I pray for you this morning that this year, God will establish all that concerns your relationship/marriage and dissolve every puzzle in Jesus’ name!
I started on this yesterday. I will complete it this morning
5. Not Seeking Help
Wise folks know it’s okay to ask for help and advice from others, but a fool thinks they’re super smart and doesn’t need anyone.
Pro 14:8 GNB Why is a clever person wise? Because he knows what to do. Why is a stupid person foolish? Because he only thinks he knows.
The Science of Foolishness Part 2
6. Making Light of Serious Mistakes
Imagine someone playing a cruel joke on someone just before their wedding and then laughing it off. That’s foolishness. Mistakes should be taken seriously.
Pro 14:9 NIV Fools mock at making amends for sin, but goodwill is found among the upright.
7. Babbling Nonsense
Fools talk a lot, but what they say doesn’t make much sense. They should listen more and talk less.
Pro 15:2 MSG Knowledge flows like spring water from the wise; fools are leaky faucets, dripping nonsense.
You know, wisdom is like a fresh spring of water. Wise people drink from it, but fools prefer to figure things out the hard way.
Pro 16:22 MSG True intelligence is a spring of fresh water, while fools sweat it out the hard way.
9. Not Keeping Promises
If you promise to do something and then don’t, that’s foolishness. Giving is a way to receive, so breaking a promise to give is like missing out on something good.
Ecc 5:4 MSG When you tell God you’ll do something, do it–now. God takes no pleasure in foolish gabble. Vow it, then do it.
10. Having Anger Issues
Losing your temper and getting mad all the time can cause problems. A wise person stays calm and doesn’t let anger ruin things.
Ecc 7:9 MSG Don’t be quick to fly off the handle. Anger boomerangs. You can spot a fool by the lumps on his head.
11. Pretending to Love When You Don’t
Fools pretend to love someone they actually hate. They also like to spread mean rumors about others.
Pro 10:18 AMP He who hides hatred is of lying lips, and he who utters slander is a [self-confident] fool.
The Science of Foolishness Part 2
12. Making Parents Sad
Foolishness can hurt your parents. Instead of bringing them joy, you make them sad. That’s not good. It’s nothing but foolishness.
Pro 17:21 AMP He who becomes the parent of a [self-confident] fool does it to his sorrow, and the father of [an empty-headed] fool has no joy [in him].
13. A fool has no secret.
A fool shares everything without thinking. They don’t keep secrets, and their lives are like an open book for everyone to see.
Pro 29:11 KJV A fool uttereth all his mind: but a wise man keepeth it in till afterwards.
14. Doubting God in Your Heart
Even if someone says they believe in God, their actions might show they don’t really believe. That’s foolishness.
Be wise and make good choices. Don’t let foolishness get in the way of a happy and smart life!
Psa 14:1 AMP THE [empty-headed] fool has said in his heart, There is no God. They are corrupt, they have done abominable deeds; there is none that does good or right.
May God help us to be wise and to embrace wisdom in our generation and beyond!
I pray that your path will not cross with a foolish lover! You will not fall in love with foolishness!
Hey there! We all do silly things sometimes, even grown-ups. It’s just part of being human. Nobody’s perfect, so don’t worry if you’ve made mistakes. But what’s important is that we learn from those mistakes and do better next time.
It is important to take an inventory of yourself because the foolishness of the foolish does not allow him to identify his foolishness, he sometimes thinks, the wise are the foolish ones!
Sometimes, you need the help of another to be able to see your foolishness because foolishness blinds.
In Matt. 23:17, 19, Luk.11:40 and Luk. 24:25, Jesus actually referred to some people as fools.
So, let’s talk about what it means to be a foolish person.
The Science of Foolishness
1. Despising wisdom and instruction
Being wise means respecting good advice and learning from it. But a foolish person doesn’t care about wise words. They think they know it all.
Pro 1:7 AMP The reverent and worshipful fear of the Lord is the beginning and the principal and choice part of knowledge [its starting point and its essence]; but fools despise skillful and godly Wisdom, instruction, and discipline.
The Science of Foolishness
2. Making Fun of Important Things
Fools like to make fun of important stuff, like God and knowledge. They prefer to spend time jesting, watching films lazily, and wasting time on social media all day long.
Pro 1:22 NIrV “How long will you childish people love your childish ways? How long will you rude people enjoy making fun of God and others? How long will you foolish people hate knowledge?
The Science of Foolishness
3. Ignoring Warning Signs
Sometimes, people see trouble coming but walk right into it. He deliberately steps into evil. He calls it necessary evil!
Pro 13:19 GNB How good it is to get what you want! Stupid people refuse to turn away from evil.
The Science of Foolishness
4. Hanging Out with the Wrong Crowd
Your friends can have a big influence on you. If you hang out with wise people, you’ll become wiser. Hang out with fools, and life will be messy.
Pro 13:20 MSG Become wise by walking with the wise; hang out with fools and watch your life fall to pieces.
Before 8.00 pm, you will get an email with instructions on how to join or simply via Singles WhatsApp Hub! See you then!
CONTINUING WITH TODAY’S DEVOTIONAL,
Hold on to your joy, dear singles and couples! The devil is doing so much to attack homes by attacking their joy!
Joh 10:10 (KJV) The thief cometh not, but for to steal, and to kill, and to destroy: I am come that they might have life, and that they might have it more abundantly.
He wants to steal, kill, and destroy your joy! Don’t allow him.
Do you know why?
That joy of the Lord is your strength!
Neh 8:10b (KJV) ..for the joy of the LORD is your strength.
Hold on to your strength by holding on to your joy!
Don’t allow tantrums, quarrels, or petty issues to come into your relationship or marriage!
Forgive your loved one quickly and in a hurry, don’t react to everything, dispel bad moods quickly with dancing, laughing, and singing!
As you do this, strength will come for your finances, businesses, and your career! You will see hindrances removed and prayers answered!
Are you already in some form of strife with your fiance or spouse? Seek to end it and stop punishing yourself!
Today is my birthday! 51 today! God has been really good! I want to express my appreciation to all our followers and partners over the years, God will continue to honour and bless you in Jesus’ name!
A FREE MASTER CLASS
There is a free Master Class you don’t want to miss! One for Couples, and one for Singles Have you registered for the FREE seminar to celebrate my 51st birthday yet? Find details below and the steps you need to take! And the best part? It’s absolutely FREE
COUPLES:
Time: 8:00pm Date: October 13th, 2023 Theme: Strengthening Connection
Instructions: Create a cozy date night atmosphere where you and your spouse can fully immerse yourselves without interruptions. Prepare some delicious snacks and drinks. Make sure to have writing materials on hand for the practical workbook session. The PDF materials will be provided during the webinar.
This free webinar is the first class of the 7 Weeks Ultimate Marriage Course.
Topic: Strengthening Connection
Activities included: a. Watching a video together as a couple b. Workbook session c. Live session with Dunamis & Sophia
Join us for an exclusive online seminar, the first class of Pre-Wedding Counseling for Singles. Theme: Enhancing Communication Skills Date: October 14th, 2023 Time: 8:00 PM
This exciting event includes:
a. A captivating video presentation b. Interactive workbook session c. Personal guidance from the esteemed duo, Dunamis & Sophia
Are you ready to embark on this transformative journey? If you haven’t registered yet, don’t miss out and secure your spot now! Simply click on this link – https://forms.gle/dUKo3nTHDLa5zphY7
The webinar link will be sent to you prior to 8:00pm on Friday! Wishing you all the best on your path to self-discovery and meaningful connections!
Find your way back to God. Similar to the prodigal son, who realized his mistakes while living a life of despair, it is crucial to come to terms with your own thoughts and emotions. This is the initial step towards regaining mental clarity, finding restoration, and overcoming confusion.
2. Seek forgiveness and dedicate yourself to growth
The next thing to do is to consciously ask God to forgive you. Do not allow the voice of doubt to convince you that you are beyond redemption. Remember, no one is ever too far gone. God has the power to save even the most lost souls. After seeking forgiveness, commit yourself to personal growth and transformation.
How To Overcome Confusion
3. Disconnect from negative influences and unhealthy relationships
The company we keep greatly impacts our lives. It is essential to sever ties with negative influences and ungodly associations. Delete their contact information and avoid visiting places that hinder your progress. Protect your destiny by making choices that align with your values and goals.
Seek the guidance of a mentor who has walked the path you aspire to tread. A mentor possesses wisdom that can help you navigate through foolishness. A single word of advice from a mentor can prevent a year of heartbreak and agony. However, choose a mentorship that feels mutually beneficial, and never allow yourself to be coerced into a mentoring relationship that doesn’t align with your comfort.
How To Overcome Confusion
5. Make reading the Bible a daily habit
Commit to reading the Bible every day. It nourishes your soul, provides spiritual sustenance, and safeguards you from falling into temptation.
6. Seek divine direction through prayer
Constantly communicate with God and seek His guidance in all aspects of life. Maintain an open line of communication with Him, and He will respond to the desires of your heart.
7. Place unwavering trust in God and His word
Trust in the Lord and His teachings. He genuinely cares for you and will always guide you in the right direction. Remember the words of Psalms 71:1, In thee, O Lord, do I put my trust: let me never be put to confusion.
Uncovering the Origins of Confusion. Today, I want to delve into a significant issue that affects both individuals and couples, whether single or married.
A recurring statement that I constantly hear is, “Pastor, I am in a state of confusion, unsure of what steps to take!” It is widely acknowledged that confusion does not originate from God. As stated in scripture:
For God is not the author of confusion, but of peace, as in all churches of the saints. (1 Corinthians 14:33 KJV)
Confusion stems from the devil. A relationship or marriage plagued by confusion will inevitably crumble. Consider this:
The city of confusion is broken down: every house is shut up, that no man may come in. (Isaiah 24:10 KJV)
The next pertinent inquiry then becomes, “What are the causes of confusion?” Let us explore some of them. By identifying the root causes of confusion, one can avoid falling victim to them. So, what are these causes?
Uncovering the Origins of Confusion
1. Neglecting to read the Bible
The word of God is life-giving. In Him lies life, and this life serves as the guiding light for humanity. When one ceases to engage with divinity through His word, confusion inevitably takes hold. If the word of God brings life and light, then it follows that neglecting to read the Bible leads to darkness and spiritual death.
Initially, this may not manifest as physical death, but it undoubtedly results in a loss of direction, brewing confusion.
2. Ignoring the voice of God
The Spirit of God perpetually seeks to guide us. He communicates with us daily and at all times. Confusion becomes the outcome when one chooses to disregard His voice and instead follow the desires of their heart.
Obedience to God and His word brings peace of mind. Conversely, disobedience to God and His principles leads to confusion. The word of God is replete with guiding principles. By adhering to these principles, one can avoid disappointment.
We lie down in our shame, and our confusion covereth us: for we have sinned against the Lord our God, we and our fathers, from our youth even unto this day, and have not obeyed the voice of the Lord our God. (Jeremiah 3:25 KJV)
4. Engaging in multiple relationships simultaneously
Being involved with more than one person in a relationship invariably leads to confusion, as it disrupts God’s intended order.
When Adam proclaimed, “This is now bone of my bones and flesh of my flesh,” he referred to a singular partner. However, when one engages with multiple individuals simultaneously, it becomes impossible to discern which person truly belongs to them.
5. Succumbing to sexual sins
Indulging in sexual compromises will undoubtedly lead to confusion. God does not desire for us to entangle ourselves in the snares of promiscuity. Such scenarios will invariably breed confusion, as they defy God’s intended order.
The subsequent pressing question then becomes, “What should one do when faced with confusion?” How does one extricate themselves from this state?
We will consider some potential solutions tomorrow.
Spirituality should never in any way disturb being a romantic lover, single or married.
This has nothing to do with sexual intimacy.
The synonyms of “romantic” include loving, amorous, passionate, tender, affectionate, lovey-dovey.
Speaking in tongues should not disturb speaking sweet things to your lover.
One is to God, the other is to your lover. After you have done the one for God, do the one for your lover as well.
Let your relationship or marriage be characterized by the expression of love.
Be passionate towards him or her.
Before the wedding, “passionate’ does not include kissing, smooching, and intimacy.
It includes calling regularly, doting on each other, praying for one another, sending loving (not vulgar or perverse) texts to each other (not sexting), buying each other flowers, chocolates, and special gifts, and doing memorable things together.
After the wedding, it includes all of the above and regular, consistent, times of intimacy, as much as you want.
In the Old Testament, honeymoons last as long as one year!
Deu 24:5 (KJV) When a man hath taken a new wife, he shall not go out to war, neither shall he be charged with any business: but he shall be free at home one year, and shall cheer up his wife which he hath taken.
God wants you to enjoy each other! Obviously, this doesn’t mean to go and stay somewhere without work in today’s world, It simply means to continue in that atmosphere of honeymoon. By the time you do one year, it becomes a lifetime practice.
In the New Testament, God wants you to have a honeymoon for life! Enjoy every day of your married life!
Sadly enough, by the first week of most marriages, it is only the moon they can find, no honey!
That will not be your portion in Jesus’ name!
The Bible clearly advocates that married couples enjoy themselves sexually and otherwise.
Pro 5:18-19 (KJV) Let thy fountain be blessed: and rejoice with the wife of thy youth. [19] Let her be as the loving hind and pleasant roe; let her breasts satisfy thee at all times; and be thou ravished always with her love.
Are You Lovey-Dovey?
There is nothing wrong with fantasizing about your spouse! It is godly. Take a look at the Message Translation:
Pro 5:18-19 (MSG) Bless your fresh-flowing fountain! Enjoy the wife you married as a young man! [19] Lovely as an angel, beautiful as a rose— don’t ever quit taking delight in her body. Never take her love for granted!
Have you done your free registration for this Friday’s seminar? Go ahead and do so, it’s my 51st birthday gift for you! Good morning!
What should come together before the wedding are the souls, in the place of beautiful conversation, healthy chats, romantic exchanges of words, making plans for the future, and envisioning the future together.
Speaking in tongues should not replace speaking loving words to each other.
Both are very important.
The Intersection of Romance and Spirituality
Speaking loving words to your lover should not replace speaking loving words to your creator.
Both are lovers.
God is the lover of your soul, your dear one is the lover of your body!
God loves you to speak loving words to Him.
Your lover craves loving words to be spoken to him or her.
After you have prayed, make sure you also play with your loved one!
There must be a balance of the romantic and the spiritual in order to keep your love life going and in order to make a relationship lead to marriage.
Speaking loving words to each other will keep false assumptions away.
Speaking in tongues will keep demonic influence away.
Speaking loving, romantic words to each other adds strength to your love life.
Speaking in tongues adds strength to your inner man.
With your love life, you fight doubt and insecurities.
With your inner man, you fight and wade off attacks of the enemy.
That is why the scripture emphasizes that romance alone will not deliver.
The Intersection of Romance and Spirituality
Rom 14:17 (KJV) For the kingdom of God is not meat and drink; but righteousness, and peace, and joy in the Holy Ghost.
That is, if you want to bring the kingdom of God into your relationship or marriage, it is not in meat and drink alone, it is not in ice cream and cinema outings alone, it is also in right living, in Shalom, and in the Holy Spirit
Do you get it?
That he is handsome alone would not be enough, can he speak in tongues?
That she has hot legs alone would not suffice, does she have a hot heart as well?
I will stop here this morning!
Have you registered for the free webinar on my 51st birthday yet? Check it out below!
Do you mean the Bible advises on some form of intoxication? Do you mean I can really get high and still make heaven?
Well, it depends on what is intoxicating you!
The Holy Writ expressly and without mincing words says you should be intoxicated with your wife!
Really?
Go ahead and read it for yourself!
Proverbs 5:18-19 English Standard Version 2016 (ESV) Let your fountain be blessed, and rejoice in the wife of your youth, a lovely deer, a graceful doe. Let her breasts fill you at all times with delight; be intoxicated always in her love.
Be Intoxicated Always!
To be intoxicated means to be drunk or under the influence of drugs.
Just that the drug is now the love for your wife!
Why would God be advising this?
He knows times will come and you will be irritated with your wife for several reasons. Some genuine, some out of ignorance, some out of arrogance, and some just some selfish ego trip.
It becomes even more intense when you are irritated with your wife and getting intoxicated with another! Ha!
That is sitting on a keg of powder! You ready don’t want to do that! I’m just advising you ni o!
So choose your source of intoxication wisely! Be enraptured with her love always! Please take my advice and have peace of mind!
Be Intoxicated Always!
My Birthday Gift For You and Your Loved One!
In another good news, I will be 51 in a few days! What? It’s amazing to realize that it’s been 51 years! I feel 21!
God has been faithful. The faithfulness of God is like a check that you can take to the bank with your full chest!
His faithfulness never fails! Not once!
Has God been faithful to me?
The answer is Yes, a billion times! God has been faithful to me!
On my birthday and the day after, I will have a FREE webinar for Singles and Couples! That will be my gift for you!
It’s going to be a loaded one you don’t want to miss! Registration is Free but required and you can find details and registration link below!
Joy is a serious business of heaven, so says Rev, Mark Hankins
As I was meditating on the phrase, the Holy Spirit whispered in my spirit,
“If joy is the serious business of heaven, then sorrow must be the serious business of hell!
Don’t Let The Devil Steal Your Joy
Sorrow, perpetual guilt, depression, despondency, and regrets are the tools of hell to create a loophole, entry point, and landing place for the cohorts of hell
The devil cannot just access your life, finances, family and so on, with a loophole Such loopholes are created when you lose your joy!
Later today, I will post a message on joy you need to listen to!
Marriage wine can often dry up, turn sour, or simply lose taste. Relationships can lose the spark, the fun, and the glee!
Love can wane, can grow old, and can fast dissipate. Feelings are fickle, never with a forever status.
What do you do when love seems to wane, when the tummy butterflies have all rested their wings, love birds have no more songs, when his or her words evoke no more feelings, and the blushing, the dimples, and the smiles have all gone?
What do you do at such times?
You are in courtship and everything seems intense, but of recently, you are no longer excited.
You don’t even look forward to hearing from each other and yet you still have peace that you are in the right relationship.
You are married, and the marriage bed has gone cold.
Intimacy used to be a trip but right now it is a complete bore. You could almost be reading a novel while you are at it. And yet the Bible unequivocally advises that Pro 5:19 (KJV) Let her be as the loving hind and pleasant roe; let her breasts satisfy thee at all times; and be thou ravished always with her love.
What happened?
Here are a few things that could steal the wine off the marriage shelf, that could sap out and zap off every fun in the union.
What To Do When Love Wanes
1. When you allow pressures to stifle the pleasure
There will always be pressures, especially pressures from work. Wise husbands and wives learn to leave office pressures at the office and not bring them home.
For those in courtship, do not allow work pressures to swallow up fun communication times, times of bonding, and times of aligning the souls.
Decide to enjoy your courtship through vibrant communication and unhindered flow irrespective of the pressures that be
What To Do When Love Wanes
2. When you allow the hustles and bustles of life to steal your rest in God
Whether you like it or not, there will always be issues to deal with.
You must have a commitment to each other in a relationship or marriage to put each other first place after God.
3. When you refuse to spend quality time together
Love will wane when you don’t spend time with each other.
Nothing will ever replace quality time spent together enriched with destiny discussions and plans for the future.
Those times of fellowship can never be replaced with any other thing
For singles in courtship, this quality time must not be tainted with sexual sins.
With compromise, quality time will become dangerous time, bringing with it, damnation and guilt.
But essentially, it’s no longer about you alone, it’s now the two of you!
Are You Single Or Married?
2. You must be responsible
Marriage life requires responsibility. It’s a life of being responsible.
You don’t live for yourself alone. You think about your spouse and your family’s well-being.
You think and carry the thoughts of your family everywhere you go.
That will inform your decision at the time. You don’t just wake up one morning and decide to travel for three weeks.
Your life as a married man or woman must reflect responsibility in all areas.
That’s why society frowns at it if a married woman or man dresses seductively because that is not expected of him/her. A married person is expected to be responsible.
God bless you this morning! Have a fantastic day ahead!
Marriage is a lifelong journey and you want to be sure you travel light.
You don’t want to carry unnecessary baggage that will make your journey strenuous and unpleasant.
There are stuff that are anti-blissful marriage.
Someone once said if you want to travel by flight you go light.
That is why your luggage is weighed at the airport before you board the plane.
If the purpose of God for your marriage and home is going to be accomplished, you must decide to let go of certain habits or mindsets.
They may not necessarily be sins but the Bible talks about laying aside the weight that easily beset us.
Heb 12:1 Wherefore seeing we also are compassed about with so great a cloud of witnesses, let us lay aside every weight, and the sin which doth so easily beset us, and let us run with patience the race that is set before us.
Your marriage is the race set before you and you must be prepared to run it with patience. You will not make a shipwreck of your marriage in Jesus’ name.
I’ll be writing to the men today as they are the leaders of the house.
Loving your wife doesn’t sometimes come naturally, especially if you have been married for a while. To love your wife, you have to learn it and practice it from time to time.
Here are practical ways to love your wives as recorded in the scriptures.
Eph 5:25-28 MSG – Husbands, go all out in your love for your wives, exactly as Christ did for the church–a love marked by giving, not getting. Christ’s love makes the church whole. His words evoke her beauty. Everything he does and says is designed to bring the best out of her, dressing her in dazzling white silk, radiant with holiness. And that is how husbands ought to love their wives. They’re really doing themselves a favor–since they’re already “one” in marriage.
Strategies for Loving Your Wife Like Never Before
1. Go all out for her: This is the first instruction given in the passage above. Go out of your way. Go all out in your love. Don’t hold back in expressing your love for your wife. Love your wife deeply. Love her with your substance. Love her with your commitments.
Love her genuinely and be interested in her progress, all around. Express that love both in action and in words Do not give your emotional space to any other except for her. Go all out for her even in your emotions!
Be there for her emotionally. This means being there to listen, understand, and comfort her during both the good times and the challenging ones.
Strategies for Loving Your Wife Like Never Before
2. Give, don’t just get: As a husband, let your love be marked by giving, not just by getting. Be a giver. That’s the way things are done. Give your time. Give your attention. Give your love. Give them to your family, not to a strange woman out there. Provide for the family. Go the extra mile to make her happy. Let your family be your priority.
Marriage is sacrifice. Let your wife see your love, commitment, and sacrifice.
Give her your time! Sacrificing time for meaningful, quality moments together is crucial
What else can you give? Thoughtful gestures will go a long way! Surprising her with a treat, leaving romantic notes, or having date nights can make her feel cherished and loved.
Don’t just get intimacy, give her too. Give her a listening ear and a shoulder to lean on, she will need it when she is down
You Will Be Joy-Full!. Happy New Month! Welcome to October! It will be a great month for you in Jesus’ name!
This month is our month of JOY-FULL! Your joy will be full in Jesus’ name!
Joh 16:24 (KJV) Hitherto have ye asked nothing in my name: ask, and ye shall receive, THAT YOUR JOY MAY BE FULL.
1Jn 1:4 (KJV) And these things write we unto you, THAT YOUR JOY MAY BE FULL.
God wants your joy to be full!
The question is, “What is that thing that God will do that will cause your joy to be full this month?
In your relationship or marriage, business or career, what is that thing that God would that will cause your joy to be full?
Get ready for it to be done! You Will Be Joy-Full!
Hitherto, you have asked nothing, go ahead and ask now! Hitherto, you have not really been in faith because you think it can’t be done. Well, go ahead and ask now, because God is going to do it!
I pray for you according to the word of the Lord, this month your joy will be full.
Something great, something beautiful, something extraordinary, something that will make you laugh, rejoice, and dance, that thing will be a reality in your life in Jesus’ name!
So what do you do?
Start rejoicing before the rejoicing!
There is always a dance before the dance! You Will Be Joy-Full!
To celebrate this month, we have an incredible resource for Singles and Couples alike! We are going to give you the ability to enjoy the first set of classes for just a peanut! Why are we doing this? We want all of you to enjoy this resource in your relationship or marriage, single or couple alike. Find the deals below!
For Couples:
The 7-Week Ultimate Marriage Course: Reconnect is a seven-week experience consisting of seven videos to watch, a workbook session and a session with Rev Dunamis and Sophia and the cost is N70,000
However, as a new month package, couples can have the first class, with the workbook for session 1 for only N2,000! That’s crazy, right? Well, you will be able to have an idea of what the course is all about for a peanut You will also have access to a workbook session for Class 1. So go ahead, it’s only available for a limited time Go ahead and register here – https://kissesandhuggs.selar.co/sample
For Singles:
We also have an incredible new month package for singles in courtship or preparing for a wedding in the near future. There is a special pre-wedding session for Singles at 50,000
For a new month package, you can have Class One complete with Sample Video and workbook for only 1,500! Yes, you heard me right! That is less than $2
We all have seeds to sow in our marriage at every point in time.
God will never leave any man without a seed. Seed is the only influence we have to change our tomorrow.
God used the principle of seed time and harvest. The whole world we see today started with just one man and one woman but today we have billions of men and women who have lived on the face of the earth.
If you have the seed(s) and you recognize the seed you have, you can change your future.
Everyone married has seeds and we have to see them and put them to use or sow them. Having seeds is useless if it is not planted. It abideth alone, so says the scriptures.
Two Seeds To Sow Into Your Marriage
1. The Seed of Time:
Every one of us has the gift of time. The people whose marriages are blissful have 24 hours and those whose marriages are troublesome also have 24 hours. The question is: what are you doing with your time?
You cannot be partying around and expect your marriage to come out better than those who give attention to their marriage. How much time in 24 hours do you give or dedicate to your family, after God?
Your marriage is like a garden. If you want a good garden, you have to spend time tending it. How much time do you spend together to talk about yourselves and get to know each other more? You have to sow the seed of time in the right direction to reap the right harvest in your marriage.
Two Seeds To Sow Into Your Marriage
2. The Seed of Words:
We all can speak. We all have the gift of words but what are we saying in our marriage?
Pro 18:21 Death and life are in the power of the tongue: and they that love it shall eat the fruit thereof.
By using their tongues negatively, some people have literally destroyed their marriages. Some curse their spouse and with their own hands have pulled down their marriage.
They destroyed the wealth of their husband and made the creativity of their wife nonsense by their negative tongues.
Some of us don’t curse but we also don’t bless our marriage and our spouse. We should consciously bless (speak good things about) our marriage and spouse.
Even when things are not working as they should be or your spouse does not know the Lord as he/she should, that’s the best time to continually declare God’s word over them.
God used the same principle
Gen 1:2-3 And the earth was without form, and void; and darkness was upon the face of the deep. And the Spirit of God moved upon the face of the waters. 3. And God said, Let there be light: and there was light.
He spoke when the earth was without form and void. He spoke about what He wanted to see.
A man of God said in his book that God spoke to him one day, “My people are busy saying what they can see, what is happening, instead of saying what they want to see”
You have to say what you want to see. Then in time, you will have what you say
Mar 11:23 For verily I say unto you, That whosoever shall say unto this mountain, Be thou removed, and be thou cast into the sea; and shall not doubt in his heart, but shall believe that those things which he saith shall come to pass; he shall have whatsoever he saith.
May God grant us understanding.
God bless your marriage. We shall continue tomorrow by God’s Grace
