Advancing By Caring For Your Lover. The man is always the muscular, stronger gender while his feminine counterpart can be frail, weaker, and vulnerable, physically and emotionally. However, the administrative and justice system of God for any marriage is amazing.
Husbands are to care for their wives. And if you don’t, God is unequivocal about it. Your prayers will be hindered.
Who wants his prayers hindered? Who wants his ways hard? Who wants his life without God’s support? That is not a place to be!
But it is so clear what God wants in the scriptures. Even as singles, you cannot be sowing wild oats all over the place, thinking there would be no consequences. In the ideal dating situation, the guy is the protector of the lady’s body and soul, not the violator of it.
Advancing By Caring For Your Lover
Let’s see how the scripture puts it.
1 Peter 3:7 (KJV) Likewise, ye husbands, dwell with them according to knowledge, giving honour unto the wife, as unto the weaker vessel, and as being heirs together of the grace of life; that your prayers be not hindered.
Let’s consider other translations to see what God is saying here!
1 Peter 3:7 (MSG) The same goes for you husbands: Be good husbands to your wives. Honor them, delight in them. As women they lack some of your advantages. But in the new life of God’s grace, you’re equals. Treat your wives, then, as equals so your prayers don’t run aground.
Who wants his prayers to run aground?
1 Peter 3:7 (GNB) In the same way you husbands must live with your wives with the proper understanding that they are more delicate than you. Treat them with respect, because they also will receive, together with you, God’s gift of life. Do this so that nothing will interfere with your prayers.
You must relate with your fiancée or wife with the proper understanding that they are more delicate and they are to be treated with respect.
Advancing By Caring For Your Lover
Pause for a moment and see if you are doing this. If not, this is the time for repentance! And O ye wives, don’t sit back and give attitudes making it harder for him to love! If his prayers are hindered, so are yours! May your prayers not be hindered in Jesus’ name!
If you are still single, the way you are relating with your colleagues, roommates, and friends is an indication of what will play out when a relationship ensues. It is therefore time to start working on yourself!
Where Is The Virtue In My Lover? Many people enter relationships and marriage expecting the other partner to be loving and sweet with little expectation on their part.
They seem to indulge themselves in their weaknesses. We permit ourselves to still linger in our shortcomings, where we are still dealing with our flesh. We expect our partner to be a shoulder we can lean on and a support system to carry all our burdens.
We expect them to be our solution to every problem and to have answers to all our problems.
We expect them to understand us when we are naughty, moody, and unpleasant.
As all these expectations seem wonderful, the reality is that there is no human being capable of fitting into that mold.
The Godhead, that is God the Father, God the Son and God the Holy Spirit is the only perfect one that can fit into that mold.
The Bible rightly says in Proverb 20:6 the last phrase, a faithful man who can find?
Pro 20:6 Most men will proclaim every one his own goodness: but a faithful man who can find?
Your search for a faithful man is going to be a long search. The faithfulness of character, and diligence in all things, spiritual and natural comes only when we embrace the virtues of God. When God the Father becomes our father indeed, God the Son becomes our meditation day and night and the Holy Spirit becomes our greatest ally.
The Proverbs 31 Woman paints an incredible picture of a woman of virtue, strength, and character, which happens to be every man’s dream woman. Verse 30b seems to be the most important verse in the whole chapter. I think the whole chapter rests on this verse where the secret of Proverb 31 woman hinges.
Pro 31:30 Favour is deceitful, and beauty is vain: but a woman that feareth the LORD, she shall be praised.
The proverb 31 woman fears the Lord.
It is high time we begin to look inwards and begin to develop our own virtue by the fear of the Lord. Whether man or woman, God is the only guaranteed source of our virtue.
An omelet is not better than the eggs that make the omelet. Instead of putting pressure on the other party for performance, let us work at becoming virtuous ourselves. Let us work at being loving, caring, gentle, kind, forgiving, a person of the word and spirit.
Whether in a relationship or in marriage. Let us work at being that powerful person. That person that will be a positive influencer in the relationship and marriage.
The Day I Met My Dream Man. The earthquakes going on in their hearts were unprecedented. All it took was the locking of their eyes for a brief moment, less than ten seconds, and sparks flew everywhere. There were no warning tremors. Its magnitude is massive enough to destroy a whole city block. It wasn’t a one-sided spark, it was mutual.
It was a like a movie straight out of Hollywood kind of meeting, everything seemed in place, the lips, tips, and hips matched the six packs, the muscles, and the beards.
Finally, it was looking like God has answered her prayers! What a good God we serve! The night vigils are finally paying off. The fasting can now be put at bay and wow, What a God of suddenly! Can I recover from the suddenness of God? She thought!
As they approached each other for the all-important introduction, her knees shook, and his lips trembled.
It looked like a heavenly written love script, except for one thing!
Their hands locked in a romantic handshake, and the handshake shook them, causing their knees to tremble in response to the “heart-quake!”
The Day I Met My Dream Man.
“Hullo, I am Bode!”
What? The voice! God can be so detailed. She wanted this Bass Voice!
“Pleasure meeting you, I am Sandy!”
Bode smiled and there was the gap tooth she wanted! She knew her testimony would be powerful on Sunday!
“I am married!” Bode said!
The shockwave sent into her interrupted the ‘heart-quakes”
“Ohh…” she said in a voice-laden disappointment, and her facial expression changed from one of ecstasy to that of irritation.
“Excuse me, I will like to use the convenience.”
The Day I Met My Dream Man.
That was her escape! She looked at herself in the mirror, a lone tear emerged and she quickly sent it back through the tear duct before it messed with her makeup!
She wondered how she nearly fell into a trap.
She knew married men is nowhere to go.
“No way, I am not about to mess it all up because of some nonsense feelings. Feelings won’t wreck my journey with God. God has a plan for me.” She affirmed to herself.
As she went home quietly, she thanked God on one side that she wasn’t deceived by that man for she would have fallen into that trap at that moment when all her thinking faculties have been hacked.
She remembered the scripture:
Proverbs 31:30 (KJV) Favour is deceitful, and beauty is vain: but a woman that feareth the LORD, she shall be praised.
It was all looking like favour, but it was a trap wrapped up in favour! The dream nan can be the wrong man!
The ultimate place God wants you to be in any relationship or marriage is that place where you love THE RIGHT towards your spouse and you hate THE WRONG towards your spouse!
What will that do?
It will cause God to anoint you with an oil that will give you leverage and space in your career business, ministry or whatever you do!
Really, Pastor? Do you mean how I treat my spouse has something to do with my productivity? Exactly Yes!
See it in the scripture before you start wondering “What is Pastor teaching again o?
Rights and Wrongs of Relationship and Marriage
Psalms 45:7 (MSG) You love the right and hate the wrong. And that is why God, your very own God, poured fragrant oil on your head, Marking you out as king from among your dear companions.
Do you see what it says right there? If you love the right and hate the wrong towards your lover or spouse, there is a release of fragrant oil on your head! The oil is to make you a KING among your contemporaries!
Wow!
Psalms 45:7 (AMPC) You love righteousness, uprightness, and right standing with God and hate wickedness; therefore God, Your God, has anointed You with the oil of gladness above Your fellows.
King James Version calls it the Oil of gladness.
Rights and Wrongs of Relationship and Marriage
When you are somewhere where your spouse is not and yet you maintain your integrity, you refuse to cheat even when you are pressured or tempted, God sees that, and His justice system will cause oil to flow that will aid you and bring you much profit and result that will propel you above your competitors, colleagues or contemporaries!
Treat your spouse well.
Singles, stop breaking hearts all over the place, thinking that is where it ends! You are literarily refusing the oil of gladness when you do that! May that not be your portion!
Honour your spouse and see money flow into your hands! Stay faithful and see God hear your prayers! Avoid emotional affairs and see how the oil of gladness will flow and give you amazing testimonies!
Healing From The Heartbreaks of Love. Love comes with heartbreaks Marital crashes often occur on the high road of romance and love. ! There are those moments when the eyes are red, and the tears flow endlessly and you just couldn’t be consoled enough.
For singles, it could be those times of rejection, when the one you love walks away or you are even the one who needed to walk away. Either way, walking away is not always a pleasant experience.
It could be those times you suddenly feel betrayed when you discover that the one you have been loving all your life is loving another!
It could be those times when you feel neglected and it seems nobody is looking your way. All the guys seemed blind, and they can’t see you unless for those who wanted a ride!
Healing From The Heartbreaks of Love
For the married, it could be those times when all your expectations have been disappointed and what you see in marriage is far from what you think it should be.
It could be those times when you feel misunderstood and your spouse isn’t lifting a finger to understand your feelings.
It could be those times when you are so deeply hurt that it reaches to the bone and marrows when the one you love and trust has broken your trust, caught red-handed frolicking with the opposite sex.
Or it could just be any of the days when there are no stars in the sky, and the moody mushy thing envelopes you and you don’t want to talk to anybody including GOD.
It could be times of going through a midlife crisis when all the cruises are gone and all that is left are crashes.
In any of those sad unhappy times, what do you do?
Sing. Rejoice. Dance. Jubilate!
What?
Isa 54:1 (KJV) Sing, O barren, thou that didst not bear; break forth into singing, and cry aloud, thou that didst not travail with child: for more are the children of the desolate than the children of the married wife, saith the LORD.
Healing From The Heartbreaks of Love
That is what you do. Do the opposite of what your flesh wants. And then, in an incredible turn of events, you will see God’s intervention and justice system in that situation and you will have victory and rejoice at the last.
Do not grumble. Do not get bitter. Do not fight back.
Leave all the fights to God.
Rom 12:19 (MSG) Don’t insist on getting even; that’s not for you to do. “I’ll do the judging,” says God. “I’ll take care of it.”
And when you do this, get ready to rejoice, because there is a REJOICING after the rejoicing.
Singles Versus Married: Some Distinctions. Here are some distinctions between singles and married that will communicate some wisdom to you.
1. The single person is just simply “selfish”
They think of themselves and no other. However, once married, they have to move from that point of “self” to “us’ for the marriage to be successful.
The singles have to train themselves to be selfless, to think of the other people around them, and learn to show some empathy and care because that is what marriage is all about.
In marriage, it’s all about pleasing one another. After pleasing God, the next person you want to please is your spouse!
Singles Versus Married: Some Distinctions
2. The singles are to stay away from pre-marital sex.
After the wedding, the couple is licensed to have sex. Even if they wanted it ten times a day, the angels will be clapping for them. But for singles involved in pre-marital sex, the angels will flap their wings and escape so that their eyes will not behold evil. Lol.
However what do we have, we are admonishing singles to wait and not be sexually involved, while we are begging married couples to have sex!
This is simply the ploy of the devil. While single, it looks like sex is the ultimate. Not really. Food is even more important than sex. You can’t do without food for a year, but I lived without sex for twenty-seven years. The very first time was after my wedding!
What about those who are already sexually active? Don’t beat yourself hard. Return to God. Let God help you and teach you how to put your body under. You must discipline your body and not respond to lust because a wedding doesn’t solve the lust problem! That is why some married folk cheat on each other!
Singles Versus Married: Some Distinctions
3. Use your season wisely.
As singles, you have all the time in the world to pray, so use that season of your life wisely. As couples, you are not going to have as much time, however the advantage you will have is the power of agreement. You will be able to join hands together and move mountains.
And this is also why you must avoid strife and quarrels like a plague so that you can properly harness the power of agreement.
The Unveiling of True Authentic Love. A true genuine love doesn’t just want to get, it wants to give!
Let’s go even further. A true love doesn’t want to give to get, it just wants to give!
There are men who will give just anything and yet it won’t still be true love!
There are men who will fund girls and yet would refuse to pay their children’s school fees, and yet it is not true love! That is just giving to get and at the height of it, it is still manipulative and unhealthy!
True love is sacrificial. True love wants the best for their lover. They don’t want them hurt in any way. They won’t violate them to fulfill the rush of their adrenaline.
True love considers their partner. True love wants the other person to be happy and joyful.
True love is not a user. True love is not manipulative or controlling.
The Unveiling of True Authentic Love
In marriage, true love wants their spouse to be happy and joyful. True love wants to please their spouse all the time.
True love will never cheat on their spouse! They love their spouse too much to desecrate their marital covenant or jeopardize their precious union.
True love wants the best for one another. Even when there are some quarrels or disagreements, it’s all resolved quickly because true love can’t successfully stay away emotionally from their lover for too long.
True love forgives quickly and rapidly because camaraderie, intimacy, loving communication, and romantic collaboration is priority!
The Unveiling of True Authentic Love
True love is not interested to the point of pursuing another person. True love is focused.
True love believes in the best and prays the best into one another.
True love looks out for one another, solving problems for one another and doing things that make them happy!
True love has the fear of God. The fear of God under guards true love and supplies the strength needed to do the needful and avoid the harmful.
Misconceptions in Relationships and Marriages. It is no secret that there have been numerous misconceptions surrounding relationships and marriages in recent years. These misconceptions have led many astray and caused irreparable damage to relationships. In this devotional, we seek to shed light on some of these misconceptions and correct them with the truth of God’s word.
1. Judging a Person by Their Sexual Performance
One of the most common misconceptions is that a person’s sexual performance is a reliable indicator of their character. This is not only false but also degrading. It reduces a person to the level of a prostitute.
In reality, there are numerous variables that one should consider when determining a person’s character. These variables may include integrity, vision, life principles, and so on. It is essential to evaluate a person as a whole rather than zeroing in on just one aspect of their physical life. Doing so can lead to a complete misconception of who that person truly is.
In marriage, young couples should understand that sex gets better with time. Older wine tastes better. So do not quickly conclude that your spouse is boring in bed. The Bible tells us the Holy Spirit teaches us all things, and that does not exclude the bedroom.
Misconceptions in Relationships and Marriages
2. Pre-Marital Sex as a Means of Securing a Relationship
Another misconception is that engaging in pre-marital sex is a way of consummating a relationship before marriage. However, this is nothing but a compromise. The moment you compromise, you reduce the chances of your getting married because you are no longer going to have God’s support and favor.
God has a standard, and compromising it is not an option. Everyone may be doing it, but it doesn’t make it right. You should not base your resolve to live a righteous life on the people around you but on your faith in God’s word.
Married couples should go beyond bedroom intimacy to 24/7 intimacy, Try non-sexual touches and communicate to your spouse that you want their person and not just the sex.
3. Once is Enough
Another misconception is the belief that engaging in pre-marital sex just once is okay. This is not true, and it is a dangerous mindset to have. Beyond the physical aspect, there is a spiritual influence that keeps you tangled and looking for more.
Once is bad enough, and people don’t die twice. A demonic influence only needs once! This negative spiritual influence can only be truncated by the anointing of God and the renewal of your mind in God’s word. However, note that if you make a mistake, God will forgive you!
Married couples should enjoy themselves and not allow persistent quarrels to tear them apart.
Misconceptions in Relationships and Marriages
4. Your Body is Not Collateral
Your body is not collateral for a relationship or marriage. Giving in to a partner’s desire to secure a relationship is a terrible idea. It is wise to do things God’s way; otherwise, you will keep securing what will never work at the end of the day. The problem is that you keep securing until there is nothing left to secure!
Married couples, your body does not belong to you after the wedding! Take note!
1 Corinthians 7:4 (TPT) Neither the husband nor the wife have exclusive rights to their own bodies, but those rights are to be surrendered to the other.
Sade is head over heels in love with Andy. They were both excited about getting married. But she has reservations in her heart. She had no idea what to do with her doubts.
George and Sandy are having an affair. Sandy is gorgeous to him, but he has this nagging feeling that something isn’t quite right.
Betty and Buddy have gotten married. They had a son, and everyone thought their marriage was beautiful, but they are beginning to wonder if they are destined for each other.
This morning, I want to talk about doubts in marriage. What are you going to do about your doubts?
Conquering Doubts In Your Love Life
When do questions arise in a relationship or marriage? These are some examples.
1 When a connection is not of God and God is attempting to draw your focus to Himself.
2 When a relationship is of God, but the devil wishes to mislead you in order for you to miss God’s will.
3 When your marriage expectations are unrealistic and your expectations are not satisfied.
4 When you engage in sexual sins, turmoil enters the soul because God’s order has been broken. Unless you swiftly ask God for forgiveness and then truly repent, the adversary will take advantage of the circumstance and cause misunderstanding.
5 When you have a distorted view of life and marriage, you will have questions about a relationship or marriage, even if it is God’s purpose.
6 When you begin a relationship or enter into a marriage without first seeking God’s guidance.
7 When the only thing you did before entering a relationship or marriage was seek some prophet or advice without a personal inner conviction.
8 When you start a relationship or get married as an escape from what you’ve recently been through.
9 When every authority figure in your life is opposed to your relationships and marriage. Doubts will occur along the road.
10 When major obstacles emerge and you are unable to handle them appropriately, you will begin to doubt.
Conquering Doubts In Your Love Life
The next question is whether or not doubt can be entirely eradicated.
The answer is emphatically NO! You see, you are still in your flesh, and doubts will try to enter your heart, but once you have heard God, you can simply eliminate the doubt!
Do you remember Jesus Christ? When the agony of what was to come overtook him in the Garden of Gethsemane, doubts began to creep in.
The second issue is, what can I do to avoid doubts?
1 Never take a step until you are certain it is God’s will.
When doubts occur, you will be able to immediately identify the source and deal with it. You will recognize that uncertainty is attempting to pull you away from God’s will, and you will oppose it.
However, when you are doubtful if it was God or not in the first place, and when doubts occur along the way, you are confused about how to address them since inner conviction is lacking.
2. Don’t be too hasty. Don’t fall in love rashly.
3 Listen to all authoritative figures in your life, including pastors, parents, mentors, and so on.
4 Learn to read and study God’s word on a regular basis.
It provides you wisdom, which helps to balance your soul.
The Power of Words in Romantic Relationships. This morning, I’d like to write about something essential. It is a biblical principle that ensures us daily triumph in our daily work, relationships, marriage, and life in general.
On the wedding day, words are exchanged as vows, and those words become the terms of the marital partnership. Constant, loving words must be spoken in marriage or the union will die. That is how significant words can be.
To dedicate your life to Jesus, you must confess a few words, and that’s it! Words are extremely essential in the Spirit realm, and the devil is well aware of this. That is why he tries to feed you unpleasant thoughts so you can express them. When you express them, they become your reality. In Jesus’ name, that will not be your lot.
So this morning’s inquiry is, “What are you saying?”
The Power of Words in Romantic Relationships
According to the Bible, when you keep your mouth, you keep your life! Take care what you say!
Don’t say something like, “I don’t even understand my own life.” (You will never understand it when you keep saying that)
“I’m completely perplexed.” (You just granted the spirit of confusion legal access to your soul.) “I believe there is a curse working against me.” (You just empowered the devil to operate)
Never use inappropriate language. Never say anything hurtful to your fiancée or spouse!
Don’t say something like “You are extremely stupid!”
Do not tell your wife she is slow.
Don’t refer to your husband as an irresponsible man.
Don’t tear your future spouse in half with your lips, dear future Wife. There is a distinction to be made between a wife and a knife!
Don’t injure and wound your future wife-to-be with insensitive words; dear husband-to-be, words mean a lot to them.
Pro 13:2-3 KJV (2) A man shall eat good by the fruit of his mouth: but the soul of the transgressors shall eat violence. (3) He that keepeth his mouth keepeth his life: but he that openeth wide his lips shall have destruction.
The Power of Words in Romantic Relationships
There are parents who refer to their children as “coconut heads!”
How would the child be bright with that prophecy when you know the only thing inside a coconut is water? Or do you not realize that whatever you call your children as parents is a foreshadowing of their future?
Don’t tell your wife, “Fat lazy woman, you were once slim and beautiful when I found you, but now you are…” Guess who made her that way? Rather than saying that, go to the gym and sign her up!
Don’t tell your hubby, “I regret ever knowing you!” Rather than saying that, pray for him since you are one!
If you are a single person who is subjected to verbal abuse on a regular basis, do not close your eyes and walk into a relationship. Seek counseling since he may not change; in fact, he may worsen after marriage because marriage does not transform anyone.
If the lady you want to marry is constantly shutting you down for any reason, it is a flaw; seek assistance and counseling!
Words are extremely crucial! Don’t tell me someone loves you when he or she constantly demotivates and weakens you with words!
5 Life-Altering Choices You Should Consider. Life is about making choices! Consider yesterday and count the number of decisions you took on your own. Your current life is a result of the choices you made in the past. The choices you make now will set the stage for the life you lead tomorrow.
2Sa 8:15 ERV – David ruled over all Israel, and he made good and fair decisions for all of his people.
There are seasons for every MAN. Morning, afternoon, and night, respectively.
The issue is that terrible choices made in the morning of one’s life do not manifest until the evening!
Most likely, you are currently in the afternoon phase of your life. Your morning error should not turn into a nighttime regret you’ll always have.
Strong decisions can alter the way your tomorrow will pan out.
Making decisions is difficult because it forces you to confront your routines and comfort zones, often in a painful way. However, it is the cost you must pay in order to proceed.
You cannot carry on doing things the way you have been doing them if you desire a different outcome in your life.
These are the choices you must make. However, the list is not all-inclusive.
1. Make the decision to connect with God.
Without this, you will not get far. A slight breeze, like when you blow out a candle, could end your life, and that would be the end of it. Fear Him who made you and has preserved you! Give your life back to Him in thanks for the gift of life!
Mat 10:28 (MSG) “Don’t be bluffed into silence by the threats of bullies. There’s nothing they can do to your soul, your core being. Save your fear for God, who holds your entire life—body and soul—in his hands.
2. Determine to have everyday fellowship with God.
You must experience daily refreshment and rejuvenation otherwise you will quickly grow weary. When fatigue is at its worst, suicidal thoughts may surface. Be sage!
Isa 40:31 (MSG) But those who wait upon GOD get fresh strength. They spread their wings and soar like eagles, They run and don’t get tired, they walk and don’t lag behind.
3. Always ask the Holy Spirit for guidance.
You have been designed as a believer to succeed solely with His assistance. You won’t be able to overcome sin without Him.
Gal 5:16 (KJV) This I say then, Walk in the Spirit, and ye shall not fulfil the lust of the flesh.
4. Choose to take responsibility.
Live your life responsibly. Get a pastor or mentor to intentionally guide you. In this way, you are kept alive. Get a confidant in your life who you can call whenever you need advice! Maintain contact with them. Grant him. Say a prayer for him. That is how a good protege behaves.
1Ti 4:14 (TPT) Don’t minimize the powerful gift that operates in your life, for it was imparted to you by the laying on of hands of the elders and was activated through the prophecy they spoke over you.
5. Choose not to engage in iniquity
Don’t let your youthful exuberance drive you to shortchange yourself or compromise your future. Zip up! Avoid engaging in any sexual vices. Quit being a boy, be authentic! Women, keep your virtue! Keep your word to your spouse. Never play around with premarital sex!
2Ti 2:19 (KJV) Nevertheless the foundation of God standeth sure, having this seal, The Lord knoweth them that are his. And, Let every one that nameth the name of Christ depart from iniquity.
Ten Tips For Finding Joy As Single Or Married. Singles and married couples alike are frequently sidetracked by the ups and downs of life. Here’s a reminder of what you should do to each other on a regular basis, as well as how to do it.
1. Please pray your spouse
Allow it to be genuine. This allows you to bring God’s help to bear on your behalf. Genuine prayers for each other will help keep you together. Reduce disagreements and increase prayer periods.
2. Call each other every day.
The problem is not whether you will see each other later in the day; the issue is that communication is the lifeline of any relationship or marriage that can survive. Keep in touch. Send SMS. Use chats.
3. Exchange gifts on a regular basis.
Ten Tips For Finding Joy As Single Or Married
It does not have to be costly! But it must be touching. Take note of what I said: exchange gifts, not gather gifts! Those small actions serve to keep the fire burning in your relationship and marriage.
4. Tell him or her how God is dealing with you through His word.
Whatever God tells you in your devotion or personal walk with God will bless him or her for as long as it blesses you. When you want to do that, you don’t have to make it look like you’re in another service, but you should make it as natural as possible.
5. Be encouraging to one another.
You are his biggest fan. You are her biggest fan. Don’t put each other down. Don’t waste your time and energy on criticism. Because you are the closest person, your opinion counts for a lot.
6. Forgive one another so that your heavenly Father will also forgive you.
You’re not flawless, are you? So, rather than becoming a judge, gently overlook and forget any flaws that are designed to appear.
Ten Tips For Finding Joy As Single Or Married
7. Make corrections with love.
Do you realize that it can take up to nine affirming statements to accommodate and see one critique as it should be seen? But you know what people do? They make nine harshly critical statements and one or none of the affirming statements. That will not have a beneficial outcome.
8. Seek to assist one another in following God’s directions.
You have the most influence. Don’t tempt him or her to sin. Stay on the straight and narrow and assist him or her in resisting temptations.
9. Don’t fuel each other’s flaws.
Instead, you should balance him or her out because you will always be stronger in areas where he or she is weak. Make yourself ready to assist him in standing. Be there to assist her in saying no to evil. Don’t be perceived as an accomplice in crime or wrongdoing. Allow him or her to state, “I believe my loved one; he will never compromise.” Trust one another and keep your trust safe.
10. Make sure you have a mentor with whom you communicate on a regular basis.
Sometimes the most heated disputes and disagreements can be resolved with a few simple comments. That is God’s grace upon our lives and this ministry: to provide positive assistance in crisis-ridden couples and godly advise to those in courtship.
Accountability to others who have done what you are attempting to achieve is really wise. Stay close to these devotionals that have helped many marriages and relationships around the world, discuss it from time to time, and continue to make improvements! So, God help us!
Help, I’m Married. I want to protect him! I just don’t want to expose her. That is why I’m not talking! Have you heard that before? This is a simple recipe for marital failure! When there is no sort of guidance or oversight, or, to put it another way, when there is no accountability, a relationship or marriage will always fail, according to experience, counseling, and even the Bible.
You are not intended to be alone because of how the kingdom of God is set up. Usually, isolation leads to desolation.
Here is God’s word:
God setteth the solitary in families: he bringeth out those which are bound with chains: but the rebellious dwell in a dry land. (Psalms 68:6 KJV)
Help, I’m Married.
God, in His wisdom, has surrounded us with both spiritual and physical families. You must be able to recognize and stick with your spiritual family. God has appointed someone to be in charge of you, someone who can provide you with insight and who can speak into your life when things are rough.
There are times when you are faced with problems, but the answer is only a few words away in the words of a servant of God who has been anointed.
This is why I frequently get concerned around couples that have no one to answer to. Couples without a mentor over them often make me uneasy. Someone correctly stated that you need mentors to avoid life’s tyrants.
Help, I’m Married.
Singles, beware of getting involved with someone who has no one to answer to except themselves! Something isn’t right when he or she starts claiming that God is his tutor.
I’ll explain why it’s so crucial that you marry a responsible person right away.
Sometimes when a couple calls for counseling, there is only one course of action that makes sense after hearing what they have to say.
If you are already married, understand that marriage is not a plaything. It’s not something that just works out fine without you putting the necessary structures and deliberate effort into healthy marital habits.
Refuse good advice and watch your plans fail; take good counsel and watch them succeed. (Proverbs 15:22 Message)
Help, I’m Married.
God has surrounded you with great people who can help. I do not advocate you talk to “everybody” but both of you must mutually agree on who you can talk to, whom you respect a lot. This person must be a phone call away and should also have a great example in his or her own marriage.
This way, you will avoid unnecessary heartaches in marriage. There is no point in giving yourselves a high BP, just simply get help.
Marriages Under Pressure. If you have any of the below wives, then you must work more on your marriage and pray more in your marriage. Interestingly, the weaknesses are actually strength turned inward. So, you want to help bring the best out of your spouse!
1. The Choleric Blooded Wife
She is reputed to be vivacious, quick-witted, emotionless in her speech and deeds, and capable of surviving on her own.
She doesn’t require outside inspiration or encouragement. She has a tendency to be quite independent, which can cause conflict in relationships.
A choleric wife typically has a temperamentally opposed husband. They should therefore learn to play to their abilities and to hide their deficiencies.
Marriages Under Pressure
2. The Career-Oriented Wife
A woman at the pinnacle of her profession has a tendency to become haughty if caution is not exercised.
In order to allow his wife to pursue her professional goals to their fullest potential, the husband must feel safe.
Some husbands may feel so frightened by their wives’ advancement. This heart is not right. Allowing her to go in the greatest direction is ideal.
Honor for her husband is the crucial word here for her to keep going without issues. The wife does not become arrogant.
3. The Unyielding Stubborn Wife
Some wives can be obstinate. In my counseling work, I’ve witnessed wives who will maintain their position despite being shown the scriptures. Of course, there are also stubborn men too.
How can you recognize an obstinate wife?
Wives who are obstinate don’t talk much; they simply won’t budge. They will simply be staring at you, but they will still act accordingly.
Also, this is not good. The couple’s prayer life won’t benefit from it.
Marriages Under Pressure
4. The Manipulative Wife
The manipulative wife has a number of tactics at her disposal, such as sobbing, having temper tantrums, withdrawing, droning on and on, refusing sex, and nagging until she gets what she wants.
She desires the man to line up at all times.
This is not an ideal marriage.
5. The Demanding Wife
This woman is demanding, and difficult, and only pays attention to what she wants or knows.
Anger is her main weapon.
She picks fights with everyone who dared to disagree with what she feels because she constantly wants to be told what she wants to hear.
Her husband constantly worries about what might occur.
This is a poor mentality that could harm the marriage.
She has limited knowledge, which is an issue, and she frequently has the wrong desires.
This Life No Balance? So brilliant, but jobless. So gifted, but largely unknown. So cute, but no husband. So responsible, but wifeless.
Anything out of balance becomes dangerous. A car out of balance can have an accident. Same way, a marriage out of balance can have marital accidents. Just like vehicles can be tagged accidented, marriages can be tagged accidented as well. Relationships can be tagged accidented! At such times, the status becomes “It’s complicated!”
A man can be handsome but very wicked.
That is why the scripture talks about evil men and froward men.
A lady can be so beautiful yet empty-headed. The scripture validates that as well.
Proverbs 11:22 (MSG) Like a gold ring in a pig’s snout is a beautiful face on an empty head.
This Life No Balance?
So people would often say humorously, “This life no balance!”
It is true that a life without God “no go fit balance!”
However, I bring you a word today, in your relationship, marriage, business, and life, God is bringing you balance in Jesus’ name!
God has in His hands, a measuring tape, coming as a surveyor to measure all areas that are out of alignment and bringing them into balance!
Zechariah 2:1-5 (MSG) [1] I looked up and was surprised to see a man holding a tape measure in his hand. [2] I said, “What are you up to?” “I’m on my way,” he said, “to survey Jerusalem, to measure its width and length.” [3] Just then the Messenger-Angel on his way out met another angel coming in [4] and said, “Run! Tell the Surveyor, ‘Jerusalem will burst its walls— bursting with people, bursting with animals. [5] And I’ll be right there with her’—GOD’s Decree—’a wall of fire around unwalled Jerusalem and a radiant presence within.'”
This Life No Balance?
They are a fine couple, but they have no kids yet
They have a lot of money, but their spiritual life is Zero
They appear so spiritual but impoverished as well
So brilliant, but jobless.
So gifted, but largely unknown.
So cute, but no husband.
So responsible, but wifeless.
Out of balance!
That story is changing today!
This is the fourth month and 4 is the number of balance! That is why a car has four tires!
God is bringing balance into every area of your life in Jesus’ name! Meditate on the above scripture and use it to pray into your life.
Most relationships and marriages are so riddled with unnecessary quarries and bickering. Some of these altercations are actually needless and totally avoidable.
On our WhatsApp Singles’ Hub and Couples’ Hub, we looked at this topic yesterday
I want to quickly share with you a few things I discussed yesterday!
I will talk about one of the principles you can apply to reduce quarrels to the barest minimum.
A Guide For Conflict Resolution
The 15 – 1 Principle
This is talking about the scripture in Proverbs 15:1
Proverbs 15:1 (KJV) A soft answer turneth away wrath: but grievous words stir up anger.
In eliminating unnecessary quarrels, you have to learn how to respond with soft answers. You don’t have to sound angry and caustic every time, for those only stir up the heat.
I love the way the Message Translation puts it:
Proverbs 15:1 (MSG) A gentle response defuses anger, but a sharp tongue kindles a temper-fire.
A Guide For Conflict Resolution
Anger is like a bomb! But a gentle response can defuse it. You never see a person defusing a bomb with aggression. They do it gently and with the highest level of caution.
You can learn from this principle. You don’t have to put your “spouse in their place” every time.
Allow them to be themselves and make mistakes.
Have you ever wondered how your spouse has been existing so many years before you met? And they have not managed to “destroy” themselves all the while. God who has kept them will continue to keep them! Why do you think your spouse is the zenith of carelessness and you must keep correcting every time like it’s a ministry?
As a matter of fact, you don’t have to answer every statement. Neither should you respond when you know where it will lead.
I put a caption on social media some days ago. I said the things that you are seriously fighting about now, you will laugh over them in some years to come and wonder why you have to make a big deal out of such things.
The things that are drawing the most intense arguments now will not even draw a comment in some years to come.
Learn from this and apply it to your life! Once again, Happy New Month!
