A person who is emotionally unavailable would want to start a relationship in a rather too fast way.
Hours after meeting, he is already laying the sheets on the bed. Hours after meeting each other, she is already giving you body language that she is all for the take!
The guy feels lucky that he just met a sexually willing babe. Well, he just met a confused soul who wants to use him to deaden the pain in her heart.
A guy who is not really in love and has no emotional connection often times just wants the jeru trip. He is not emotionally available.
What you need to know is that for a relationship to work properly, there needs to be a development flow. But when you try to bypass the natural rhythm of intimacy, there will be relationship chaos!
An emotionally unavailable person wants the sexual phase of the relationship to happen quickly, but we all know that this is a phase that God wants to be reserved till the time of marriage.
I am going to stop here this morning, but before I go, a word for the married.
Did you miss out on yesterday’s devotional, we’ve got you covered. Kindly go HERE. For KHC video Devotionals, kindly go HERE
In marriage, make sure nothing steals times of intimacy building between the two of you. Never allow any other person apart from your spouse into your emotional space!
Your emotional space is only for your spouse and any other person is an “alien” that will do damage to your heart. Block out every emotional opening and space to colleagues, boss, friends, and even your pastors! Let all the emotional space be taken by your spouse only!
That is how to be on safe ground!
May God grant more understanding in Jesus name!
I pray for all who might just be going through the process of emotional healing, I ask that God will touch your heart and grant you the grace to forgive and let go in Jesus name!
CONFESSION FOR THE DAY I will not be a wreck to my lover
PRAYERS FOR THE DAY Lord, help me to be emotionally stable
THOUGHT FOR THE DAY Rom 14:17(MSG) God’s kingdom isn’t a matter of what you put in your stomach, for goodness’ sake. It’s what God does with your life as he sets it right, puts it together, and completes it with joy.
ACTION PLAN FOR THE DAY Heal from the past before moving to the next
What God Wants From All Wives. There comes a time when we need to tell ourselves the truth as read in the manufacturer’s manual, the Bible. The Bible is the only book that tells us the truth about any situation. Thank God the truth about everything is available in the Word.
There is a long portion of the Bible that is directed to wives. Let us take a close look at what the manual for marriage has to tell us. The Passion Translation puts it in ways we can read and understand, in contemporary English.
And now let me speak to the wives. Be devoted to your own husbands, so that even if some of them do not obey the Word of God, your kind conduct may win them over without you saying a thing. For when they observe your pure, godly life before God, it will impact them deeply. Let your true beauty come from your inner personality, not a focus on the external. For lasting beauty comes from a gentle and peaceful spirit, which is precious in God’s sight and is much more important than the outward adornment of elaborate hair, jewelry, and fine clothes. Holy women of long ago who had set their hopes in God beautified themselves with lives lived in deference to their own husbands’ authority. For example, our “mother,” Sarah, devoted herself to her husband, Abraham, and even called him “master.” And you have become her daughters when you do what is right without fear and intimidation. – 1Pe 3:1-6 (TPT)
This scripture addresses issues in marriage, and it is addressed to the wives. We will address the issues directed to the husbands tomorrow by the Grace of God.
Verse 1
1Pe 3:1 (TPT) And now let me speak to the wives. Be devoted to your own husbands, so that even if some of them do not obey the Word of God, your kind conduct may win them over without you saying a thing.
This verse deals with issues of husbands that are not sensitive or caring to their wives. It advises wives to be devoted to their husbands and have kind conduct which will eventually melt their husband’s heart to them. This will happen without them nagging their husband.
Did you miss out on yesterday’s devotional, we’ve got you covered kindly go HERE. For KHC video Devotionals kindly go HERE
So nagging does not work. Replace it with being devoted to your own husband. Being devoted simply means being very loving and loyal, spirit, soul, and body. So, wives, God expects you to be loyal and loving to your spouse.
To be continued…
CONFESSION FOR THE DAY I receive strength to be who God has made me to be
PRAYERS FOR THE DAY Pray for a submissive heart
THOUGHT FOR THE DAY After all, we don’t want to unwittingly give Satan an opening for yet more mischief – we’re not oblivious to his sly ways! (2Co 2:11 MSG)
ACTION PLAN FOR THE DAY Read the bible passage in other translations
There are benefits of gratitude. The dictionary defines gratitude as the quality of being thankful; readiness to show appreciation for and to return kindness.
The last time your classmate showed you art of kindness, did you return it?
Why do we need to show gratitude?
Gratitude brings healing.
As he entered a village, ten men, all lepers, met him. They kept their distance but raised their voices, calling out, “Jesus, Master, have mercy on us!” Taking a good look at them, he said, “Go, show yourselves to the priests.” They went, and while still on their way, became clean. Luke 17:12-15 [MSG]
Now see what happened a few verses down the line.
One of them, when he realized that he was healed, turned around and came back, shouting his gratitude, glorifying God. He kneeled at Jesus’ feet, so grateful. He couldn’t thank him enough — and he was a Samaritan. – Luke 17:15-16
Are you following? Did you see what I saw?
Now, let’s listen to the conclusion of the whole matter from Jesus mouth.
Jesus said, “Were not ten healed? Where are the nine? Can none be found to come back and give glory to God except this outsider?” Then he said to him, “Get up. On your way. Your faith has healed and saved you.” – Luke 17:17-19
Notice the difference. Nine lepers were cleansed but only one got healed.
Will you still be filled with complaints or will you be full of gratitude?
The ball is in your court.
Prayer: Father, help me to show gratitude at all times. Amen
Action Point: Keep showing gratitude.
Declaration: I will not murmur. I will give thanks to God at all times
Emotional availability is necessary for a good relationship or courtship to lead to marriage and also for a good marriage to work out.
However, there are a lot of ladies and young men who are emotionally unavailable and yet are praying desperately to get married. It is not going to work like that.
It is like somebody praying to graduate without going to school. That would never happen without the first.
You can be emotionally available without messing up. You can be emotionally available without being taken for granted and desecrated by sexual opportunists.
Emotional availability is necessary for a healthy relationship that will lead to marriage.
One of the greatest love mishaps is to fall in love with an emotionally unavailable person. It is an affliction of the soul and it is a waste of time.
How do you spot a person that is not available emotionally?
1. He is cooling off
His hands have just been burnt in a past relationship. His heart has just been broken in a former relationship where he or she has given all his heart but is heavily disappointed.
That person is simply emotionally unavailable.
His love or her love is ambidextrously intertwined with the old and the potential new.
It is like drinking a melange of old and new wine. The alcoholic consequence will culminate in a collateral damage.
The emotions are confused and he or she is still smarting from the love that went sour. The taste is still left in his mouth and taste buds are numb from experiencing the new.
In his or her subconscious, there is still a wish that the old should have worked out. He or she is still missing out on something or he thinks something is still missing.
It even gets worse if they had been sexually involved, and the illegal cementing of the souls complicate issues.
The way out is always never to jump into a new relationship as a way to numb his pain.
A person who just broke up and is still hurt still has his or her emotions in a confused state and such a person is simply not available to begin a new relationship.
I always advocate that a minimum of six months should be given before you move into another relationship.
This will enable a proper emotional severing and disconnection, a time of healing and cleansing of the soul and preparing the soul for the new.
God is always a good God.
When a relationship breaks up or doesn’t work out, God will always give a new direction but it is not something you should rush into!
So before you fall in love and allow unnecessary butterflies to start to flap their wings, are you emotionally available?
CONFESSION FOR THE DAY I will not be a wreck to my lover
PRAYERS FOR THE DAY Lord, help me to be emotionally stable
THOUGHT FOR THE DAY Rom 14:17(MSG) God’s kingdom isn’t a matter of what you put in your stomach, for goodness’ sake. It’s what God does with your life as he sets it right, puts it together, and completes it with joy.
ACTION PLAN FOR THE DAY Heal from the past before moving to the next
This is one of the questions people ask in our couples’ meeting. They want to know how to handle a spouse that you seem to be doing everything possible yet they seem not to be responding to your efforts.
They often leave their spouses frustrated and sometimes some of them think of a separation or divorce.
Your spouse could be difficult in so many ways. Couples have very different personalities. We are born to different cultures, we have different ways of viewing situations and interpreting them, in short, we have different ways and methods of doing everything. Including how we eat, talk, dress,
All these could and much more could lead to one spouse frustrating the other.
I know it’s difficult when your spouse is frustrating you. You have to develop staying power and not give up on your spouse. If the tables were turned around and you are the one that has issues, you will want your spouse not to give up on you.
Here are a few hints that will help
1. Pray
When you have a spouse that is difficult you have to pray because only God can change a person. It takes God to step in and visit the heart and make it right again. Most issues we face in marriage are as a result of habits we develop a long time ago. Some of these issues also have a spiritual root. When we pray we are taking the matter to the creator who can create a permanent change. We pray what we want to see, we don’t pray about the problem. We pray scriptures as the Holy Spirit gives us utterance.
Jesus said unto him, If thou canst believe, all things are possible to him that believeth. – Mar 9:23
2. Patience
You have to know that the problems will not be solved in a day. There are a lot of things that will be unlearnt in the process and it takes time. God is working behind the scenes and He doesn’t do magic, He works by His principles. You have to give your spouse time to change and expect the change too soon. He or she will change eventually if you don’t give up too soon. Keep trusting God and you will see your heart’s desires.
But if we hope for that we see not, then do we with patience wait for it. – Rom 8:25
3. Do your part
You have to keep doing your own part of the marriage while you expect your spouse to change for the better. You don’t stop your part of the covenant. The covenant has to be serviced so that God can honor the marriage.
Did you miss out on yesterday’s devotional, we’ve got you covered kindly go HERE. For KHC video Devotionals kindly go HERE
And now let me speak to the wives. Be devoted to your own husbands, so that even if some of them do not obey the Word of God, your kind conduct may win them over without you saying a thing – 1Pe 3:1
4. Get a counselor
When a crisis arise, you have to seek help in the right place, from the right people, and at the right time. It is not the issue that is a deal it is who you talk to when things are not so good.
Some people will have talked to everybody except the person anointed to help them. God anoints people to help us solve problems. Don’t talk to your parents, friends, a colleague at work, people in the church, your family, your spouse’s family, lawyer, etc.
Talk to a good counselor preferably a pastor. Let him put the issues together by God’s Grace and anointing on his life. He will not always tell you what you want to hear but he will put the situations together.
Counsel in the heart of man is like deep water; but a man of understanding will draw it out – Pro 20:5
May God grant us Grace and give us strength in difficult times.
God bless our marriages.
CONFESSION FOR THE DAY I will cooperate with my spouse
PRAYERS FOR THE DAY Pray for your spouse
THOUGHT FOR THE DAY After all, we don’t want to unwittingly give Satan an opening for yet more mischief – we’re not oblivious to his sly ways! (2Co 2:11 MSG)
ACTION PLAN FOR THE DAY Read the devotional meditatively
How do you face rejection, especially when it is coming from a loved one? Let’s look at the story of Tosin.
‘Don’t sit there!’ a harsh voice said behind Tosin as she was about to sit on the chair. It was Mariam, a year older than her and the leader of the popular girls at the tutorial center.
‘Why?’ Tosin asked, masking the feeling of rejection inside her with a pleasant smile, as she turned towards the approaching Mariam.
‘Because you’re not in our group’ Mariam replied, swiping Tosin from head to toes with her eyes. Her little entourage at her heels did the same to Tosin, giving cruel smiles and chuckles as they passed her and took the row of seats.
Tosin managed to find a seat somewhere but held her head high as she did so.
Rejection is hard on children because it screams out to them you are not wanted, needed, beautiful, important, or worthy of love.
Psalm 27:10 ‘Though my father and mother forsake me, the Lord will receive me’. (NIV)
God doesn’t love us because of who we are, what we have, where we live, our parents, or for any other reason. He loves us just the way we are.
The bible says He first loved us. He loves us so much he made the earth for us, gave us air to breathe, the sun to shine and so much more the earth contains.
And He will never reject us. He promised to always love us. Even if others reject us, he won’t.
So children, know that God loves you. Even if the world rejects you for any reason, God will never do so.
As you go about your daily activities, thank the Lord for his unconditional love towards you.
It is good to follow the peace of God in your heart and not just your flesh.
It is good to stay in joy in the Holy Ghost; which is expressed always with your shout, dance, laughter, and singing.
This is how you get into the kingdom. This is how you get a spouse in the kingdom.
It is not just in spending unnecessary money all over the place. It is not just in making a decision because you saw the hips.
This thing goes beyond the pulchritude. It extends beyond the externals. It is not in partying all over the place, it is never in meat and drinks.
The believer that will get anywhere in God must be disciplined. Fast at least once a week. Leave the meat and the drinks alone.
How do you tell me you are a child God and you do all the alcohol, you smoke, party, and you do all that the unbeliever do? Something is not quite right there!
You may succeed in hiding the masturbation, pornography, and all the secret sins from your pastor, but those sins are so loud in heaven! And that is where your blessings come from, not from your pastor.
Do you want to please your pastor while you don’t care what God thinks? That is dangerous!
Fear God o!
Your thoughts are louder in heaven than your voice on earth! The fear of God is the beginning of wisdom.
The hips, the lips, and the trips are really important but never concentrate on that alone at the expense of God. When you leave God out, you are inviting crisis and storms.
You can live right with the help of the Holy Spirit. Ask Him to help you!
Then, take decisions. You cannot be asking the Holy Spirit to help you from sexual sin and then on Friday, you pack your load to go and spend the weekend in his place! That is mocking God and His word! And it is not a good place to be.
Your prayers must be backed up by tough decisions. Tough decisions about your destiny!
Some numbers must be deleted. Some associations must be severed.
You keep saying she is the one seducing you and yet you keep visiting her every night. No, you are the seducer o!
You have been in several relationships. All of them were sexual. All of them broke up. The pattern is clear enough! Stop ignoring the obvious and take charge of your destiny.
It is not only sex that can lead to breakups. There are relationships that were non-sexual and yet broke up!
It could be you rushed into it, it could be your attitudes, it could be anger problem, and it could just be that is not God’s best for you.
There are good men that could be wrong men for you. There could be a good lady, and yet she is the wrong one for you.
The baseline is to get close to God. The Holy Spirit will lead you through His peace in your heart.
Leave the meat, drink, fun, and all of that for a while and concentrate on the threefold cord that runs through the kingdom of God.
May God give you more understanding in Jesus name!
We break the power of iniquity in your life in the name of Jesus. I release God’s peace, shalom, nothing missing, nothing broken, to surround you in Jesus name!
I pray that the joy of the Lord is yours today and forevermore!
CONFESSION FOR THE DAY I refuse to mock God in any way
PRAYERS FOR THE DAY Lord, help me to live with your fear in mind
THOUGHT FOR THE DAY Rom 14:17(MSG) God’s kingdom isn’t a matter of what you put in your stomach, for goodness’ sake. It’s what God does with your life as he sets it right, puts it together, and completes it with joy.
Ever since the fall of man from grace and God’s Glory, man has been involved with one form of struggle or another. Especially in marriage, man has lived to deal with numerous challenges. Most of these challenges and struggles have left our marriages less than the original intention in God’s heart for marriage.
The picture in God’s heart for every marriage is for both man and woman to live like the trinity, like the Godhead, in perfect unity.
So God created man in his own image, in the image of God created he him; male and female created he them. – Gen 1:27 (KJV)
The concept of unity is the original intention of God in marriage. Where this picture or intention is not known, struggles and disunity will be experienced.
Most of us struggle in our marriage and experience heartaches. Spouse cheating, adulterous affairs, spouse not being open, hiding from each other, cold, financially unfaithful, unfriendly, egoistic, dead spiritually, not meeting each other’s needs, lack of intimacy, lack of love and respect, emotional adultery, and so on.
Did you miss out on yesterday’s devotional, we’ve got you covered kindly go HERE. For KHC video Devotionals kindly go HERE
Not having the original picture that God had in His heart is what brings about all these struggles in marriage.
To put an end to all struggles in marriage, we need to engage the help of the Holy Spirit in helping us see the right picture as was in God’s heart in the beginning. We have to go back to the original intent in the heart of the Father.
Yes, every other thing we try to do will make meaning only after we have a revelation of the Oneness concept.
A blissful marriage is possible. Not that you will not have your differences or different opinions, you will still have because you are different and differently made to fulfill and occupy different roles.
The only way to enjoy peace and harmony is to get back to God’s original intention and God will help us all in Jesus mighty name.
God bless your marriage.
CONFESSION FOR THE DAY My marriage will not be an adage.
PRAYERS FOR THE DAY Oh Lord, restore my marriage to the original mandate.
THOUGHT FOR THE DAY Gen 1:28 {MSG}God blessed them: Prosper! Reproduce! Fill Earth! Take charge! Be responsible for fish in the sea and birds in the air, for every living thing that moves on the face of Earth.”
ACTION PLAN FOR THE DAY Go back and study God’s plan for your marriage.
Little children, keep thanking God. That is my word for you today. There is just something about gratitude.
The week might have begun smooth or rough for you, depending on what happened to you.
For some people, you wish you could change the hand of time and begin the week on afresh.
There is something quite a number of us do not do, which ought not to be so.
Listen to what the bible says;
In every thing give thanks: for this is the will of God in Christ Jesus concerning you. 1 Thessalonians 5:18 KJV
God’s will is that you give thanks. How best can it be explained?
Regardless of how your week started, how your day went, or how the last month was, God is saying you should cultivate a habit of thanksgiving.
See how another version puts it.
Whatever happens, keep thanking God because of Jesus Christ. This is what God wants you to do. – 1 Thess 5:18{CEV}
Have you taken a moment to wonder what would have happened if Jesus Christ did not come?
Thank God for your parents. Thank Him that you have life. Thank Him for the school you are attending. Thank Him for your country. Some nations are at war as we speak. Children like you cannot go about their normal lives or play as kids should.
This week, just like the scripture admonishes; whatever happens, keep thanking God.
Don’t murmur. Don’t complain. Just be full of gratitude.
Tomorrow, I will show us a few benefits of being full of gratitude.
A couple of years back, a certain lady called me. Let’s call her Sister Sube.
She started by telling me how bitter she is against God, that God has refused to answer all her prayers. She said despite constant vigils, fasting, and prayers, God has turned a deaf ear to her. She told me how she was on the brink of giving up.
Sister Sube went further to tell me that she has been crying for days and that she is thinking of forgetting God and moving on. She told me that no serious man has approached her in the last few months.
Then she dropped the bomb!
She said, “Even this man that I am living in his house has refused to propose!”
“Living in his house?” I asked.
“Yes now, I thought if I move into his house, it will make things fast, but right now, he has only been sleeping with me.”
Then she concluded, “Pastor, I am tired.” I pray a lot, no answer. I am even just coming from a vigil right now.”
As ridiculous as this may sound, I am telling you a true story. And I am also sure there are many people who might have found themselves in this kind of predicament.
The reality is that you cannot violate a part of the scripture and then expect His promises to work for you.
Yes, some things happen by acts of mercy, but you get to a certain point, God commands everyone to repent.
That lady above is trying to mock God. Sadly, God cannot be mocked. Such a person ends up deceiving himself or herself.
There is no point attending vigils and going to the mountain every Friday and then continuing in sin. It is just a waste of time.
Let me give you some tips that can help.
For the kingdom of God is not meat and drink; but righteousness, and peace, and joy in the Holy Ghost. – Romans 14:17 (KJV)
You cannot gallivant your way to heaven. It requires a certain level of seriousness and discipline with your spiritual life. It requires some inconvenience.
There is always a price to pay. It is not in meat and drink alone. It is not in tripping her, taking her to cinemas alone, and buying her gifts.
Meat and drinks, fun, and frolicking around are never the passwords into God’s kingdom.
It is in righteousness which is right living. You cannot cheat your way into the Kingdom. You are either for Him or against Him.
May God grant you more understanding!
CONFESSION FOR THE DAY I refuse to mock God in any way
PRAYERS FOR THE DAY Lord, help me to live with your fear in mind
THOUGHT FOR THE DAY For the kingdom of God is not meat and drink; but righteousness, and peace, and joy in the Holy Ghost. – Romans 14:17 (KJV)
Rejoice Again And Again In Your Marriage. The Bible says husbands should enjoy the wife of their youth. This means you both should enjoy yourselves while you have the strength as a young couple. Don’t be too serious at home and learn to live together as best friends.
The force of joy is very vital on the home front. Joy, celebration, thanksgiving, rejoicing, the sound of melody, praises, and worship to God all go hand in hand.
Let the people praise thee, O God; let all the people praise thee. Then shall the earth yield her increase; and God, even our own God, shall bless us. – Psa 67:5-6
We are encouraged in this scripture to praise the Lord, then our earth, whatever it is the represents earth will yield her increase. Whether barrenness, lack, joblessness, debt etc
The logical thing to do is get moody when things are not working. But we operate from a higher level. We rejoice to get the increase. Your boss, spouse or colleague may be treated you bad. You don’t fight back you switch into praise.
Did you miss out on yesterday’s devotional, we’ve got you covered kindly go HERE. For KHC video Devotionals kindly go HERE
Receive Grace and strength to enter into praise. God inhabit your praise. Your praise invite God to fight on your behalf.
Rejoice in the Lord alway: and again I say, Rejoice. – Php 4:4
Let nothing steal your joy. Let your rejoicing be in the Lord
Don’t allow the pressure of finances, raising children, in- laws and others destabilize your togetherness and joy. Nothing must come in between your joy. Between the two of you, one person will be more playful and tend towards being joyful all the time
Let the playful one take the initiative and the other follow suit.
The Holy Spirit knows what He’s saying when He says enjoy the wife of your youth. Be deliberate in making each other happy. Do not make others outside your home or marriage happy at the expense of your spouse.
Read books together and discuss them. Invest in each other.
I pray your marriage will be beautiful and filled with new wine.
God bless your marriage
CONFESSION OF THE DAY I love my spouse and we enjoy life together
PRAYER FOR THE DAY Lord help us to be joyful always.
THOUGHTS OF THE DAY Ecc 9:9 Live joyfully with the wife whom thou lovest all the days of the life of thy vanity, which he hath given thee under the sun, all the days of thy vanity: for that is thy portion in this life, and in thy labour which thou takest under the sun.
ACTION PLAN FOR THE DAY Rejoice and enjoy yourself
Be grateful always, little children. But what’s with saying, “Thank you?” Why all the fuss?
Saying “thank you” is much more than speaking the words. It should come from deep within you. It is a sign that you truly appreciate what was done for you.
Being grateful is sweet because it tells the person doing you the favour that the help they rendered to you was indeed needed by you. No one wants to receive what they don’t need. So also, no one wants to give help or do favours that are not needed.
Again, your show of gratitude tells the person that their time wasn’t wasted on you. If you refuse to say or show your gratitude, you are saying to them that they just wasted their time and resources on you. That you don’t need it. Or even value it.
That’s very unfair and could mar your chances of ever receiving from them again.
Today and onwards, learn to show your gratitude with your words and actions. Let these two things tell people you are an appreciative person.
The quality of meekness is one state of the heart that should not be compromised. Marry a teachable woman. You need a lady that is submissive.
Submission is not subservience or servitude. It is just a cooperation to allow your husband have the final say.
As a lady, never marry a man you detest or that you cannot defer to.
In talking to women, Apostle Peter listed some qualities every woman should have and every man should look for.
When they observe the pure and modest way in which you conduct yourselves, together with your [a]reverence [for your husband; you are to feel for him all that reverence includes: to respect, defer to, revere him—to honor, esteem, appreciate, prize, and, in the human sense, to adore him, that is, to admire, praise, be devoted to, deeply love, and enjoy your husband]. 1 Pet.3:2
Now, listen very carefully. You will not always find a perfect woman! You have to allow her to grow. You have to be patient.
If you are looking for that Mrs. Perfect, I have news for you, she does not exist!
4. Look for a woman you love and your heart blesses!
Marriage is by choice and not by force, so it is important you look for a lady you truly love and your heart blesses. Don’t marry out of pressure or suggestion.
When you marry a woman you truly love, when there are crisis or challenges, the first statement from you won’t be, “I want a divorce,” rather it would be “how can I salvage this situation?” Why? Because you love her!
The scripture likened marriage to Jesus Christ and the church. If Jesus Christ is like the husband, and the church is like the wife, the question is “has the church, the wife of Jesus Christ been perfect?”
The answer is No! How is Jesus Christ coping? How come Jesus has not divorced the church? The church is truly in a messy state and the body of Christ seemed divided and yet the scripture made a shocking statement that all husbands must learn from.
That he might present it to himself a glorious church, not having spot, or wrinkle, or any such thing; but that it should be holy and without blemish. (Ephesians 5:27 KJV)
How will Jesus achieve this for God’s sake? You see, because I am supposed to take a cue from Him since I am a husband or husband-to-be like Jesus Christ is the husband of the church.
Message Translation even made it more incredible.
Christ’s love makes the church whole. His words evoke her beauty. Everything he does and says is designed to bring the best out of her, dressing her in dazzling white silk, radiant with holiness. And that is how husbands ought to love their wives. They’re really doing themselves a favor––since they’re already “one” in marriage (Ephesians 5:26-28 Message)
I must look for a woman I truly love and I am comfortable that everything I do or say is designed to evoke her beauty and bring the best out of her!
Verse 27 tells us how Jesus Christ would achieve this.
That he might present it to himself a glorious church, not having spot, or wrinkle, or any such thing; but that it should be holy and without blemish. (Ephesians 5:27 KJV)
May God grant you more understanding.
CONFESSION FOR THE DAY I am deliberate in my approach to find love
PRAYERS FOR THE DAY O Lord, turn things around in my favour
THOUGHT FOR THE DAY And that is how husbands ought to love their wives. They’re really doing themselves a favor––since they’re already “one” in marriage Eph 5:28 MSG
ACTION PLAN FOR THE DAY Start preparing for your marriage now.
Marriage, like any living thing, must be kept alive by taking certain actions on a regular basis. It has to be regular because consistency is necessary if we will make a success of our marriage. We have to learn to pay attention to it. Whatever we pay attention to grows and increases.
We see and hear of successful couples who have been happily married for 30years or more doing the same things over and over again.
It is not the big things we do that makes our marriage great but it is the little things we have learnt to do on a consistent basis that makes our marriage work and become better and more intimate.
Here are 3 simple things we can do as a matter of routine.
1. Play
Couples should learn to play together. Marriage grows stale and monotonous if we don’t take time to play. We could as well be a house or flatmate. One out of the two spouses will be more playful. Please be responsive whenever your playful spouse makes advances, even when you don’t feel like. There is nothing as frustrating as been giving a cold treatment each time a spouse what’s to play.
For the serious or not so playful mate, you can always learn to play. The benefits of playing are so much. You look and feel younger and it is a good therapy against worry.
2. Pray
It is true that whosoever you pray for and play with every day, you love more and get to be fond of more.
Let every couple take time daily to pray for each other. Even if you cannot pray together, maybe because of different schedules, you should pray for each other.
Each of us has twenty-four hours. Let us take some moment out every day to thank God for our spouses and then pray.
Did you miss out on yesterday’s devotional, we’ve got you covered kindly go HERE. For KHC video Devotionals kindly go HERE
If we have a scripture we pray on a daily basis for our spouses, the better. We can be sure that they are saved from the hands of the enemy daily.
Imagine you praying every day for your spouse for 20 years. How beautiful will it be? When you pray for your spouse, you are saying that you know your spouse is weak but divine intervention will help them.
3. Pay
Let being married to your spouse cost you something. Don’t let their birthdays pass you without you spending money to celebrate and appreciate them. Make every day special. Buy little stuff for your spouse. Pay their bills. Don’t be married and yet your purse is not. Let your purse know that you are married.
Being married means you can’t buy things only for yourself. You can’t pay for your food at the restaurant, it has to be for at least two.
As a husband, when you see something on any lady you admire, buy it for your wife also.
I believe if we can do these 3 things on a daily basis, our marriage will improve.
God bless your marriage.
CONFESSION FOR THE DAY I will work at making my marriage the best
PRAYERS FOR THE DAY Lord, help me to pray for my spouse daily
THOUGHT FOR THE DAY Speaking to yourselves in psalms and hymns and spiritual songs, singing and making melody in your heart to the Lord; – Eph 5:19
Jesus commanded the disciples to take the Good News to all the ends of the earth; that is what witnessing for Christ means. He wants everybody on the earth to know about Him. Knowing Jesus means they accept Him as their Lord and Saviour.
Mark 16:15 (KJV) And he said unto them, Go ye into all the world, and preach the gospel to every creature.
As a Christian, you are more or less like the disciples in the bible. Jesus’ command still stands today. He wants you to tell others about Him.
Why do you need to tell them about Him?
If you discover a cool program or song that you think your friends will like, won’t you want them to know about it?
That’s the same way with telling others about Jesus. You know the benefits of knowing about and accepting Christ into your life as Lord and Saviour and you want them to enjoy these benefits too.
May the Lord grant you the grace to witness to others. Amen.
Prayer: Lord Jesus, thank You for being my Lord and Saviour. Give me the grace to tell others about you.
Action point: Which people do you think you should tell about Jesus
It is important you look for a lady who is your friend. Friends don’t want to hurt one another. Friends love each other truly. Friends forgive each other easily. Friends want to be with one another. Friends don’t have problems with communication. They talk all the time.
It is important that your love grows from friendship. That is why it is not good to rush into a relationship with a person you barely know. There is a huge difference between marrying an acquaintance and marrying a friend.
It is even worse when you decide to marry a stranger that you met on social media. You will not live on Facebook. You will not give birth on Google Plus. You will not cook on LinkedIn.
So, why establish and maintain a relationship over social media?
Why fall in love with a profile? Why become emotionally attached with a voice over the phone? You have to go for a friend and friendship involves constant communication and a committed relationship.
Before you fall in love, before you are caught in a rapturous ecstasy, try and see her one on one! It is impossible to fall in love with a person you don’t know, so become friends first and don’t be caught up in infatuation.
2. Look for a homely woman
The next thing to look for in a woman is homeliness. Look for a lady that can cook! Yes, she is not a house-help, but she has to know how to cook! Good food is very important to men.
As a single lady, train yourself to know how to cook well. If she cannot cook, there will be issues.
If as a lady, you had grown up among several house-helps and you barely go to the kitchen, you have to deliberately teach yourself how to prepare good food in preparation for marriage.
If you visit your fiancée and all you are served are always noodles, flakes, beverages, and refreshments, you should start suspecting! That’s a joke!
Be creative with cooking. Get on the Internet and download recipe ideas.
To be continued…
CONFESSION FOR THE DAY I am deliberate in my approach to find love
PRAYERS FOR THE DAY O Lord, turn things around in my favour
THOUGHT FOR THE DAY And that is how husbands ought to love their wives. They’re really doing themselves a favor––since they’re already “one” in marriage Eph 5:28 MSG
ACTION PLAN FOR THE DAY Start preparing for your marriage now.
Best Ways To Fall In Love Again As Couples – Part 3. This is the conclusion of our discussion in the last three days.
8. Respect each other’s space
You have to respect each other’s space. Let your spouse be. Sometimes back, my husband was quite busy putting our services online and doing other ministry stuff to meet a particular schedule. Then he finished his work and all the tension seem to have disappeared, so he wanted to play.
It was however a wrong time for me to play. I was praying and studying. He did play for some time but he respected my time to study and pray. We respected each other’s space and were willing to understand and help each other grow.
9. Be each other’s friend
Being each other’s friend has to do with everything including being gist partners, cheerleader, number 1 fan, critic, prayer partner, jester, teaser, confidant, gossip, gist partner, teacher, mentor, leader, you just name it.
Just focus on each other. Do things that please each other. Love each other. Follow the guiding words of 1 Corinthians 13. Love each other genuinely.
Did you miss out on yesterday’s devotional, we’ve got you covered kindly go HERE. For KHC video Devotionals kindly go HERE
10. Be your unique self
Your uniqueness remains your best selling point that endears you to your spouse. Of cause, try to be an improvement of who you are but don’t lose your flavor. Your flavor is the taste your spouse can never get anywhere else.
Do things that your spouse can remember with only you. Avoid nagging, being unfriendly, cold, harsh, or abusive. Try also not to be lazy because it takes hard work to build a marriage.
God bless your marriage.
CONFESSION FOR THE DAY I refuse to be a lazy spouse
PRAYERS FOR THE DAY Pray for a closer bonding with your spouse
THOUGHT FOR THE DAY After all, we don’t want to unwittingly give Satan an opening for yet more mischief – we’re not oblivious to his sly ways! (2Co 2:11 MSG)
ACTION PLAN FOR THE DAY Take out time to bond with your spouse
Galatians 5:22 (KJV) But the fruit of the Spirit is love, joy, peace, longsuffering, gentleness, goodness, faith,
What exactly does joy mean? What was the writer of Galatians saying when he was talking about this fruit of the spirit?
Joy can be defined as gladness and delight. It can also be said to be a feeling of great pleasure and happiness.
Going through the bible, we can define joy to be a feeling of good pleasure and happiness. This feeling is dependent on who Jesus is, not on who we are or what we are experiencing around us.
Joy comes from the Holy Spirit, abiding in God’s presence and from hope in His word.
Dear children, understand that joy is not found in possession, activities or other people. Joy is found in God, in His presence, in His spirit and in who He is.
As children, learn to be joyful in all circumstances. Never allow your countenance to be down. You should always exhibit this priceless fruit of the spirit wherever you find yourself.
As parents, let us learn to affirm our children as this will also be a source of encouragement to them even as they strive to be more joyful, by the spirit.
Prayer: Lord, help me to live a life of joy; Amen.
Action point: Ask for the spirit of joy
Declaration: I am a joyful child. I have the spirit of joy in me.
You were born in one day! Nobody is born in days or weeks. That is why it is birthdays that are celebrated and not birth week or birth month.
You started school in one day. You matriculated into a higher institution in one day. You will graduate in one day.
One day, you will propose. One day, you will give or get an answer.
The processes may take weeks and even months, even years but the crescendo, the actual happenstance is one day!
You will have your wedding in one day. It is called wedding day!
Heaven was created in one day. The earth was fashioned in one day.
The man was made in one day. Eve became a reality in one day.
Jesus was birthed in one day. He was crucified in one day. He rose up in one day. He ascended in one day.
Death comes once and takes one day! Life comes in one day when you received Jesus into your life.
I am here to tell you this morning, that all you have gone through, what has made you cry, what has messed you up, the past that seems to have dragged for years, the delay in marriage that seems would not end, all will be sorted out in one day!
Sometimes, the issues we face seem so gargantuan that we conclude it cannot be solved in one day! But in one day, God will turn things around for you.
Who hath heard such a thing? who hath seen such things? Shall the earth be made to bring forth in one day? or shall a nation be born at once? for as soon as Zion travailed, she brought forth her children. – Isaiah 66:8 (KJV)
But it happened in one day!
They have been in servitude and slavery for over four hundred years. Their slavery is not only acute but generational. Grandsons met their grandfathers as slaves and their own children met them there!
If such slavery and bondage has extended for over four centuries, certainly it would take years to dislodge and be free.
But not with God!
In one day, a nation was born. In one day, they left. In one day, they were made free. In one day, their emancipation came.
I want to announce to you this morning that the trans-generational issue is coming to an end in one day.
I say unto prophetically, as of the Lord, that affliction, that delay, that family issue that has been there is over today in Jesus name.
Weeping has endured for a night, now your joy has come!
You have been jobless for years, but your one day is here!
You have been trusting God for the right spouse for years, but today I announce to you, your marriage is born!
Now, how did the children of Israel leave? How did they cross the red sea? How did they transit from over 400 years of servitude into freedom in one day?
Here it is;
He turned the sea into dry land: they went through the flood on foot: there did we rejoice in him. – Psalms 66:6 (KJV)
It was with rejoicing! And that is what I dare you to do.
Keep rejoicing. Laugh at that situation. He that sits in heaven is laughing because your victory is sure.
He that sitteth in the heavens shall laugh: the Lord shall have them in derision. – Psalms 2:4 (KJV)
And you have to laugh too because you are seated with Him. Glory to God!
Refuse to be depressed. Rejoice at your victory because that one day of yours is here!
I announce to you in the name of the Lord, your one day is here!
Be blessed!
CONFESSION FOR THE DAY My one day is here! Glory to Go
PRAYERS FOR THE DAY O Lord, turn things around in my favour
THOUGHT FOR THE DAY Psalms 2:4(KJV) He that sitteth in the heavens shall laugh: the Lord shall have them in derision.
ACTION PLAN FOR THE DAY Start singing and dancing now.
So yesterday, we looked at how to increase our love walk with each other as couples. I felt we addressed the spiritual aspect more and some people could be asking for something more practical and easy to relate to. At least, not everybody is a pastor.
More practical ways to show or increase in our love walk as couples.
6. Give undivided attention to your spouse
It is disheartening when as couples your spouse gives you little or no attention at all. You feel you don’t matter and your person is not relevant to your spouses’ life. You feel they can do without you and your input doesn’t count.
This is not a good feeling and must be avoided, if your marriage must work. Learn to give your spouse your undivided attention. The best way to do this, is by listening to what they have to say and looking at them eye ball to eye ball.
Did you miss out on yesterday’s devotional, we’ve got you covered kindly go HERE. For KHC video Devotionals kindly go HERE
7. Take time to recreate together.
My husband is a very busy man and I’m grateful to God for his multidimensional ability in painstakingly using his initiative at his work. It is translating to food on the table. Despite his busyness, he still finds time daily to play and make us laugh.
When you are with someone you love, you should make the atmosphere lively and environment conducive to laugh.
Play, joke, make jests, tell stories that touch the hearts (lol), play games together, etc. Just find something to do together.
To be continued…
CONFESSION FOR THE DAY I give undivided attention to my spouse
PRAYERS FOR THE DAY Pray for a closer bonding with your spouse
THOUGHT FOR THE DAY After all, we don’t want to unwittingly give Satan an opening for yet more mischief – we’re not oblivious to his sly ways! (2Co 2:11 MSG)
ACTION PLAN FOR THE DAY Take out time to bond wit your spouse
