Today, we start with how to ensure your safety as a sheep in this world. A sheep knows better than to be alone without any help. The first way to ensure your safety is to have a shepherd. Jesus is your shepherd. He is the good shepherd.
“I am the good shepherd. The good shepherd sacrifices his life for the sheep” John 10:11 NLT.
He repeated it here
“I am the good shepherd; I know my own sheep, and they know me,” John 10:14 NLT.
What does a shepherd do? A shepherd looks over a flock of sheep. He is their guardian, watching over them. A protector that keeps them safe from being attacked by other animals stronger than they. He is their provider, ensuring they graze on the choicest grasslands.
As a child, you have to be under the protection of somebody. That’s why you have parents to look after you. They gave birth to you and really care for you. They will protect and provide for you. God has made them shepherds over you in this world.
Prayer: Lord, help me to obey my parents who are my shepherds in Jesus name. Amen
Action Point: Have you been disobedient to your parents? Repent.
Declaration: I am an obedient child. I listen to my parents.
”What about Deacon Joshua, you said he asked you out as well?
“That one doesn’t have money joor” Is it only preaching we will be eating after marriage?”
“Uhmmm…”Who else asked you out?”
“Brother Tomi, he is too short.”
“But it is not in heights?”
“Why is your own husband tall?”
“Susan!”
“Brother Bode also asked me out, but his mouth is too sharp, he talks too much like somebody that has mouth diarrhea!” Brother Tola is too tall, and he is bent over like somebody that is sick. I cannot marry him.” Brother Chiefo is too old for me. He is nearly forty-five. I am not sure if he is a real man.
Brother Sanmi is too busy playing the keyboard. He will not have time for me. Brother Bubu is okay but the way he smiles reminds me of my primary school teacher that nearly killed me with beating. Mr. Tony is an ideal man, but the way I see him, he will turn me into a housewife. Brother Steve said he wants to become a pastor, I cannot marry a pastor.
Brother Faith seems to like women a lot, I cannot be competing with other ladies in my matrimonial home. Brother Eze is okay, but his bow leg is a concern. Mr. Smith would have been it, but the way he walks like a village man will not befit my destiny. Brother Love is too dark like God forgot him in the oven or something like that. Mr. Scoot is too light, if both of us are light, will our children not become albinos? And Mr…..”
We need to continually remind ourselves that life as married couples require a lot of hard work. We need to always make efforts to be whatever is needed in our marriage to be a better spouse
We must all be ready to make sacrifices. Selfishness cannot be tolerated in marriage. Never can superiority complex whether spiritual, financial, societal, intellectual and any form of superiority complex for that matter be tolerated.
Now that you are married, some attitudes must be knocked out of our lives.
Here are five things to never consider. They are no-go areas, all things being equal.
1. Never make your spouse feel intimidated.
Some people are fond of intimidating their partners. They feel to lead, it has to be by force or by coarseness. It is a partnership, not a boss servant relationship. No one is superior or inferior. The husband is the head but that doesn’t mean he is superior.
2. Never cheat on your spouse
Infidelity comes at a high price. It usually costs so much when you are involved in extramarital. The cost of broken trust is very high you don’t want to meddle with it. No matter how much the temptation, it is not worth it.
Did you miss out on yesterday’s devotional, we’ve got you covered kindly go HERE. For KHC video Devotionals kindly go HERE
3. Never deny your spouse jeru trip
This goes for both husband and wife. Denying your spouse also means not being patient enough and not doing enough foreplay for especially the wife to climax and enjoy it. Don’t deny your spouse the enjoyment God indented in Jerusalem trip. Explore different styles. Proper hygiene is also important. Be considerate of your partner and help out with the kids and some house chores if you must enjoy a pleasurable trip at night.
4. Never keep a secret from your spouse
Well, it is possible you keep certain sensitive issues from your spouse for better timing. But please no secrets. Don’t keep your past a secret from your spouse, no matter how terrible it is. Of cause, wisdom is necessary here.
Don’t keep friends you share secrets and keep secrets for each other.
5. Never shut your spouse up
If you continually shut your spouse, the day you need him/her to make an input or contribution on a matter, he/she will not have confidence. Accord every opinion, suggestion with respect. Learn to listen as there may be wisdom in it. After all, God gave you your spouse to make your lives together better.
God bless our marriage
CONFESSION FOR THE DAY I am naked and not ashamed with my spouse in all things.
PRAYER FOR THE DAY Ask the Lord to teach you how to be a better spouse.
THOUGHT FOR THE DAY I exhort therefore, that, first of all, supplications, prayers, intercessions, and giving of thanks, be made for all men; 1Ti 2:1
ACTION PLAN FOR THE DAY Practice the above principles.
You can engage your greatest weapon as a child. As a child, do you know that God sets you as an example for adults?
In one of Jesus’ teachings, he teaches that it’s important for everyone to be “child like” Being child like means the person isn’t bothered about the issues of life, and believes everything God says without wondering how it will happen.
A child is quick to forgive and holds no wrong. A child is also joyful.
One of the most important things about childhood is the joy you as a child carry all the time.
This is a strong weapon (your greatest weapon) and the devil can only try but cannot steal the your joy, why? Because the next minute you are joyful about something else.
Today, I want to tell you to set the standard in your family and among your friends.
The bible says the joy of the Lord is your strength. It means you are strong if you are always joyful.
Nehemiah 8:10 (KJV) Then he said unto them, Go your way, eat the fat, and drink the sweet, and send portions unto them for whom nothing is prepared: for this day is holy unto our LORD: neither be ye sorry; for the joy of the LORD is your strength.
God numbers you as one of the strongest persons in the world because of joy. Joy is your greatest weapon.
You can teach others around you to be joyful as well, how?
“But why? You are beautiful, you are active in church and everything seems to be going on well.”
“Na beauty I go chop?” Beautiful and yet husbandless at thirty-five?”
“God has a man for you”
“Where is the man? And when will the man come?”
“Just be patient and be prayerful.”
“Shebi, you are already married, cooling off in your husband’s home, with a romantic six-packed man to rest your naughty head on every night, while I am speaking in tongues alone on cold nights with no one in sight”
“Sister Susan!”
“Sister Joy!”
“What about Brother David?”
“It is you that will marry Brother David!”
“Ah! What happened to Brother David?”
“You came to church this morning in a Toyota Lexus right?”
“Yes”
“So, I should go and marry Brother David so that I can improve on all the trekking I have done in the last thirty-five years? So that my name can enter Guinness Book of Record for The trekker of all times, abi?”
“Ha!”
“You no know say the trek wey I don trek for this world, e no get part 2?”
“You can make somebody laugh”
“How will you not laugh?” Please, don’t talk about Brother David o?”
“But my husband didn’t have a car when we married.”
“I don’t have that patience.”
“Ok, what about Brother Godwin? He asked you out and he has a car?
“That one? That bushman? He cannot even pronounce the name of his car well. He is out of it.”
“Brother James also asked you out. That one nko?”
“Brother James is too spiritual for me. He doesn’t know more than quoting Bible and praying in the Holy Ghost. I am not sure I will ever get to see a movie if I marry him.”
“Tee Boy also asked you out. He is not as spiritual.”
“Ah, that choir boy who has toasted every lady in church? He is too carnal for me.”
To be continued tomorrow…
CONFESSION FOR THE DAY I will not miss it in marriage.
PRAYER FOR THE DAY Lord, open my eyes to the realities of life.
THOUGHT FOR THE DAY Romans 14:17 [KJV]For the kingdom of God is not meat and drink; but righteousness, and peace, and joy in the Holy Ghost.
This is the concluding part of the series. Let’s go further as we unravel the mystery behind having a model marriage.
3. Be submissive
Hmmm ….here we go again. Must we always be submissive and must we always talk about this?
Yes o, my dear sister. We got to emphasize it because that is the way things in the marriage will work. That’s how God ordained it and it cannot be reversed. So darling, just align yourself to it.
Anything that has two heads is a monster. So someone has to be the head and that is your husband. Allow him to be the head. Relinquish the right to lead you to him. Let him have the baton. That’s how you have a model marriage
You too have ideas, your ideas can only work when you put them under his leadership. Submission is ‘mission under’, put your own mission under his.
Don’t give your head a headache or migraine. If he has a headache, he won’t be able to do what he should do. If the head is good, the body enjoys it.
Did you miss out on yesterday’s devotional, we’ve got you covered kindly go HERE. For KHC video Devotionals kindly go HERE
4. Be his friend
I know it may be a little difficult. For some ladies that were not really friends in courtship or were friends but life happens and it seems the friendship is going down the drain.
Listen, you can develop friendship again. You are in a life-long relationship and you don’t want to spend it with an unfamiliar person. You don’t want to spend the rest of your life being stuck with someone not your friend. Your journey together is much easier and more fun if it is spent with a friend.
5. Be a helper of his destiny
What is his destiny and purpose? Where is he going? To be his helper of destiny, you have to understand his destiny and how to come in at every different season of his life to help him. He will go far with your help.
There is no king without a kingdom. A king cannot do everything by himself. By his position, a king must be helped for the throne to be established. The more subjects the king has, the more his kingdom is established.
What makes a king different from another? They all occupy thrones, but the more those who are helping him, the greater. And his wife should be the number one helper.
We are the queens. Have you seen a king without a queen? He is just not complete. Be that queen you were created to be and the Lord will help us to have a model marriage.
God bless our marriage
CONFESSION FOR THE DAY I am supportive of my husband in all areas.
PRAYER FOR THE DAY Lord, teach me to be supportive of my husband in Jesus name.
THOUGHT FOR THE DAY 1Ti 2:1 I exhort therefore, that, first of all, supplications, prayers, intercessions, and giving of thanks, be made for all men;
ACTION PLAN FOR THE DAY Begin to look at areas you can give your support and begin to give it.
“It is not enough to know what you want. You must also know what God wants for you. You yourself, are you a virgin?”
“Not really.”
“So, is your desire fair and just? Your mind seems confused. If you are not careful, it will be long before you get married.”
“Why do you say so?”
“Stop stressing yourself, with all you want and what you don’t want.
Relax in God and allow Him to lead you. Stop all these nonsensical lists you are making because you will never find anybody that conforms to your lists and desires a hundred percent.”
“Seriously?”
“Unless you want to order for a robot that will be built to your specifications”
“So, what should I do?”
“Go and pray and let God’s Spirit lead you. When you embrace God’s leading, you will find out you have made the right choice in the end. God knows the right statistics that a lady will become in another five years and ten years that will still fit into what your desires are. Allow Him to lead you. Your brain is too small to lead you.”
“Will God also take into consideration the pulchritude?”
“Yes!”
“Then, I will follow God.”
“You had better do so. Pray and look around. She is around you. She will not fall from heaven. Ask God to open your eyes of understanding to see beyond your nose and stop making carnal fleshly decisions.”
“I hear!”
“I pray for you, you will not miss God in Jesus name! God will lead and establish His marital plans in your life in Jesus name!”
“Amen!”
“I need to go now! I have an appointment with my fiancée!”
CONFESSION FOR THE DAY I will not miss it in marriage.
PRAYER FOR THE DAY Lord, open my eyes to the realities of life.
THOUGHT FOR THE DAY Romans 14:17 [KJV]For the kingdom of God is not meat and drink; but righteousness, and peace, and joy in the Holy Ghost.
We started this topic yesterday. Let’s go further as we unravel the mystery behind having a model marriage.
1. Be supportive
The role of the wife is that of support. Support in what? Support in whatever and everything your husband is doing? In the small things as well as the big things, serious or not so serious things, relevant or not so relevant things.
It is difficult to say what is relevant to him or not because women and men are wired differently. That is why you need to make up your mind to be supportive in all areas.
This cannot be overemphasized. Our role is that of support. As a wife, you have to learn it, pray it into your life and ask for Grace to be a supportive wife.
You can give your support in very numerous ways. Be observant and sensitive you will know where to support your husband.
You may also have to ask him from time to time, how you can support him now because seasons in marriage change. So don’t be rigid. Support him with your finances. Don’t detach your support from your finances.
Did you miss out on yesterday’s devotional, we’ve got you covered kindly go HERE. For KHC video Devotionals kindly go HERE
2. Be prayerful
As a wife, if you don’t pray for your husband, who or what do you then pray for? We should be praying for our husbands daily as top priority.
And when he was at the place, he said unto them, Pray that ye enter not into temptation. And said unto them, Why sleep ye? rise and pray, lest ye enter into temptation. – Luk 22: 40, 46
When you pray, you guide yourself from entering into unnecessary temptations. If your husband is anointed, he needs prayers. If he is not so anointed, he needs prayers. Whichever way you want to look at it, he just needs prayers.
He needs prayers to take the right decisions. He also has authority over you.
I exhort therefore, that, first of all, supplications, prayers, intercessions, and giving of thanks, be made for all men; For kings, and for all that are in authority; that we may lead a quiet and peaceable life in all godliness and honesty. – 1Ti 2:1-2
When we pray for our husbands, we are also praying for ourselves because only then can we live a peaceable and quiet life.
To be continued tomorrow…
CONFESSION FOR THE DAY I am a supportive and praying wife.
PRAYER FOR THE DAY Lord, help me to do all that is needed to have a model marriage
THOUGHT FOR THE DAY Luk 22:46 And said unto them, Why sleep ye? rise and pray, lest ye enter into temptation.
ACTION PLAN FOR THE DAY Begin to look at areas you can give your support and begin to give it.
The Holy Spirit is the Spirit of God; He is the special gift. He is our friend and comforter. In the place of prayer, He enables us, especially in tough situations.
You need Him to function perfectly as a child of God. When Jesus was going to leave the earth, the disciples were sad to hear this. He said that he had to go for the Holy Spirit to come. The Holy Spirit had to come for us to receive the spirit of God.
How do you receive the Holy Spirit?
The first thing is to accept Jesus Christ as the Lord and Saviour of your life. This means that you confess all your sins because you believe God sent Jesus to die for your sins. After this, you renounce all sins and make a decision not to go back to them again.
That if thou shalt confess with thy mouth the Lord Jesus, and shalt believe in thine heart that God hath raised him from the dead, thou shalt be saved. – Rom 10:9, KJV
The next step is receiving the baptism of the Holy Spirit either by the laying of hands or by the Holy Spirit himself coming on you. The manifestation of this is the evidence of tongues. Some kids might choose not to speak in tongues, probably out of fear of what their friends or classmates might think or say about them. Others could just be afraid of what is happening to them.
Who, when they were come down, prayed for them, that they might receive the Holy Ghost: Then laid they their hands on them, and they received the Holy Ghost. – Acts 8:15, 17, KJV
I beg you not to be afraid of what people around will say or think of you. Do not be afraid of what is happening to you. The Holy Spirit is not harmful in any way.
After this, you need to start practicing the tongues you have been given. Do so as often as you can. This is a great way to pray as it enables you to weed out distractions. It helps your spiritual muscles grow.
For which cause I put thee in remembrance that thou stir up the gift of God, which is in thee through the laying on of my hands. – 2 Tim 1:6, ASV
Having the Holy Spirit, the special Gift, is one of the best things that will happen to you as a Christian.
Thinking aloud, Bob said, “O Lord, where is my woman?”
His friend Ade, looked at him, hissed and retorted, “Woman ko, Grandmother ni!’
“Abeg, I no dey talk to you o”
“You better not be talking to me and don’t bother to talk to God as well.”
“Thank God you are not God! My God will answer my prayers”
“God will not answer that prayer!”
“Kai! What is your problem now?”
“Where is your woman? She would drop from heaven?
“I am patiently waiting for God.”
“What are you waiting for? May you not wait for ever. The wife you will marry is around you.”
“Is it because you are lucky and you are getting married next month? God will do my own too.”
“God has already done it, but you are blind, proud and stubborn”
“Who are you talking about?”
“I am talking about Sade. That lady likes you.”
“I cannot marry her. That girl will fry me alive if I marry her!”
“Why?”
“That sister can talk. The other time we had a date, she dominated everything. I thought I could talk, until I met her. That day, I surrendered.”
“I think she was just being free and being herself.”
“Well. I got scared. I am not sure that is what I want.”
“Ok, what about Sandra? You went out with that one briefly too”
“If I marry Sandra, our house will be too boring. She hardly talks. She will just be looking at you like Lucozade, sitting like sitting room, and as cool as cucumber!” I need someone in-between.
“Ok, what about Sister Comfort? She is not a talkative and she is not so quiet. I think there goes your bride.”
“It is not only Sister Comfort you will see, you will soon see Sister Compassion! Why did you not marry her before you chose that damsel of yours?
“It is you that said you don’t want a loud lady and you don’t want a quiet one. Sister Comfort is just perfect for your desires.”
“She does not have the pulchritude.”
“Pulchritude” Which one is that again?
“She does not have the rotundity of my dreams.”
“Yeh! Rotundity! This brother is backslidden.”
“She does not have the tips, hips and lips. I want a babe, not just a sister.”
“Lord, God Almighty!”
“There is a difference between a sister, a sisto, a babe and a woman!”
“Ha! May you not remain a bachelor for life!”
“I simply know what I want.”
To be continued tomorrow…
CONFESSION FOR THE DAY I will not miss it in marriage.
PRAYER FOR THE DAY Lord, open my eyes to the realities of life.
THOUGHT FOR THE DAY Romans 14:17 [KJV]For the kingdom of God is not meat and drink; but righteousness, and peace, and joy in the Holy Ghost.
I almost can hear someone say, ‘can one really have a model marriage?’ My answer is an absolutely yes. You can have a model marriage, but you have to be willing to work at it. Marriage is work, but God promised that our labor of love will be rewarded.
The work requires the input of both the husband and the wife. It is not supposed to be the sole responsibility of one spouse to do all the laboring. Both should labour for the marriage but in different aspect of the marriage.
Marriage requires hard work, commitment, sacrifice and like someone puts it, you have an appointment with 4 things,
1. Appointment with losing
2. Appointment with dying
3. Appointment with sacrifice
4. Appointment with suffering
All these look negative but in reality, they are just God’s way of developing our faith muscle and causing us to die to the flesh.
Did you miss out on yesterday’s devotional, we’ve got you covered kindly go HERE. For KHC video Devotionals kindly go HERE
It is not only women who need to lose, die, sacrifice and suffer, but both the husband as well as the wife.
A wife loses her life just to care for her children. So it’s not really losing, dying, sacrificing in terms of punishment but to gain something higher and worthwhile.
So also, you have to die to your own convenient ways or your opinions if things will work out In the marriage.
Tomorrow, I will point out some things the wives can do to have a model marriage.
God bless your marriage!
CONFESSION FOR THE DAY I am supportive of my husband in all areas.
PRAYER FOR THE DAY Lord, teach me to be a supportive spouse in Jesus name.
THOUGHT FOR THE DAY Eph 5:22 For wives, this means being supportive to your husbands like you are tenderly devoted to our Lord.
ACTION PLAN FOR THE DAY Begin to look at areas you can give your support and begin to give it.
You should be part of the fold. A sheep doesn’t exist on its own or should say it wants to stay alone. That poses a huge danger to it as wild animals can prey easily on it. Also, it won’t be able to enjoy other benefits of having a shepherd around.
What is the key reason why you shouldn’t move away from the flock? The bible says that the enemy comes to steal, kill and destroy. The enemy doesn’t come to be your friend but to make sure you don’t become who God says you are.
How does this translate to you as a child of God? It simply means that you shouldn’t move with and or act like unbelievers. The bible says again that one shouldn’t be unequally yoked with unbelievers.
As a child, make friends with Christian believers like yourself, attend church regularly, practice what the bible says, and obey your parents.
A flock of sheep consists of sheep, not sheep and lions or other animals. If you find a pride of lions, it only has lions in it, not lions and gorillas. So why would a sheep want to be with a pride of lions when the lions only want to tear it into pieces?
Your place as a sheep is with your fellow sheep guided and guarded by your shepherd. The shepherd can only watch over sheep, not lions. And a sheep that has been with lions cannot be like a sheep again unless it drops the lion’s attitude and behavior.
Any sheep that refuses to be like a sheep beside its shepherd will definitely be removed from the flock. Why? So that it doesn’t influence the other sheep into becoming like it. It doesn’t contaminate their minds and teaches them how not to be sheep.
Stay with your flock so you don’t fall prey to wild animals. Let Him shepherd you as you should be.
Once you were like sheep who wandered away. But now you have turned to your Shepherd, the Gaurdian of your souls. 1 Pet.2:25 NLT.
Prayer: Lord, help me to stay within the reach of my shepherd always. Amen
Action point: Have you wandered away? Retrace your steps home.
Here is the concluding part of yesterday’s devotional
3. Marriage will not make you more spiritual
Before, all the worship is unto God, but now, it’s some for God, some for your wife! After you are through with “God I worship you, I bless you, I honor you” and so on, then you resume part two which are ‘Dear, I love you, you are the most beautiful woman I have ever seen, you are this and that!’
And trust me, it is something you have to do because the scripture advises that you love, embrace and let her thoughts fill your heart!
So the real deal is creating a balance and to make sure one does not suffer for another.
But in all of that, the couple should learn to give God the first place in their lives. When they do that, God will help them and teach them by His Spirit how to make the marriage work better.
4. Marriage will not bring joy
Marriage will not bring joy. It can bring happiness, which is temporary. The only guaranteed factor that brings joy is the word of God. So, both of you should fill your hearts with the word of God. Apart from all the chocolates and delicacies, you should also learn to “eat” God’s word regularly.
Thy words were found, and I did eat them; and thy word was unto me the joy and rejoicing of mine heart: for I am called by thy name, O Lord God of hosts (Jeremiah 15:16 KJV)
That way, joy is guaranteed, even in the midst of contradictory situations. The reason joy is so important is that it is your strength. You need that strength in marriage. Depression weakens you.
But the joy of the Lord brings strength!
…for the joy of the Lord is your strength. (Nehemiah 8:10b KJV)
Know this and understand that a successful godly marriage will not be on tripping, outings, eating out, vacations, and cinemas alone, but in righteousness, peace and joy in the Holy Ghost.
For the kingdom of God is not meat and drink; but righteousness, and peace, and joy in the Holy Ghost. – Romans 14:17
Be blessed!
CONFESSION FOR THE DAY I will not miss it in marriage.
PRAYER FOR THE DAY Lord, open my eyes to the realities of life.
THOUGHT FOR THE DAY Romans 14:17 [KJV]For the kingdom of God is not meat and drink; but righteousness, and peace, and joy in the Holy Ghost.
There is tremendous power available when we as couples live in agreement. Agreement does not mean we are the same or have the same opinion.
Husbands and wives are by design different because their roles and assignments in the marriage are different.
To enjoy a wonderful marriage where both are in sync, the husband and wife must understand this perspective. The devil understands this and that is why he fights our agreement all the time.
Again I tell you, if two of you on earth agree (harmonize together, make a symphony together) about whatever [anything and everything] they may ask, it will come to pass and be done for them by My Father in heaven. – Mat 18:19
The Bible emphasizes this truth. Couples should have a vision or goals for their family. They should make up their minds right from the onset of the marriage that it’s a No, No to divorce, they will try and communicate their needs to each other, forgiveness will be a priority and they will support one another.
You may not agree on trivial things but they must ensure they are in agreement on some core values. Unity is very important in marriage. In fact, the essence of marriage is for husband and wife to be in unity so that their strength can be multiplied.
Did you miss out on yesterday’s devotional, we’ve got you covered kindly go HERE. For KHC video Devotionals kindly go HERE
God Himself promised to be in their midst.
For where two or three are gathered together in my name, there am I in the midst of them. – Mat 18:20
The power of God flows in a marriage where there is unity and agreement, where the husband loves the wife and the wife is submissive to the husband. They move forward and are able to fulfill their dreams and accomplish great feats just as God ordain it.
When the wife gives her full support to whatever the husband is doing, knowing that if he succeeds they succeed together.
It is high time husbands and wives everywhere begin to see what the devil is doing and wants to do and shut the door against division and disunity in their home.
Their focus and aim should be to always line up in agreement with each other, to be each other’s greatest fan.
Wives, even if you don’t understand him, (as you will not most of the time), you should still give your support as an act of obedience to God and then allow God do the rest. Your position as a wife is not to tackle him, but to support him.
The instance you may not support him will be if it is a direct violation of God’s commandments.
May God help us all in Jesus name.
God bless our marriage.
CONFESSION FOR THE DAY We seek to be in agreement always.
PRAYER FOR THE DAY Lord, help me to be constantly in agreement with my spouse.
THOUGHT FOR THE DAY Mat 18:19 Again I tell you, if two of you on earth agree (harmonize together, make a symphony together) about whatever [anything and everything] they may ask, it will come to pass and be done for them by My Father in heaven.
ACTION PLAN FOR THE DAY Be in agreement with your spouse, that is what makes you one flesh.
Little one, there is power in your words. Your words reflect what your dominant thoughts are towards a person, situation, or thing. In other words, your thoughts form or influence your words.
“The Lord hates evil thoughts. But he is pleased with kind words.” Prov. 15: 26 ICB.
The types of words you speak to a person, about something or a situation tells a lot about your feelings.
So also, the degree to which you say those words, coupled with your facial expression, a lot can be understood.
A raised, angry, and harsh voice could mean anger or dislike. But a low, cool, and sweet tone could show love, respect, and care.
May God give you the grace to speak sweet and kind words to even those who hurt you. Amen.
Prayer: Lord, Jesus, I need your help with my words. Help me to deal with my thoughts so I can speak positive and life-giving words even to those that offend me in Your mighty name I pray. Amen.
Action point: After dealing with your thoughts and words, how about apologizing to someone you said some unkind words to? Try it.
Declaration: I receive the grace not to think or speak ill towards anyone.
Marriage in itself does not have much power beyond the two people involved and their relationship with God. What makes the marriage covenant effective is the personal relationship that both spouses have with their God.
For example, a man that has the fear of God and is conscious of the covenant factor in marriage will not get involved in adulterous relationships. On the other hand, a man that has no respect for the covenant will not hesitate to dishonor the marriage covenant. So in effect, the marriage relationship or covenant is honorable to the extent that both spouses honor God in their lives.
This is why we keep telling you from time to time, you cannot just marry anybody! That somebody has hot legs or that a man has a car is not enough reason to marry that person! Even though marriage is a sacred institution that God Himself instituted, it is left for the couples or intending coupes involved not to trample on that which is sacred.
Here are a few things that marriage will not do for you.
1. Marriage will not change your personality
Marriage will not change your personality because marriage is not really a change agent. Change begins from within and not from without. That you now have a man or woman beside you and wedding rings on your fingers does not change anything about you, really.
Once you notice that you have some negative personality tendencies, start working on them right away, and don’t wait till you are married.
If you are a sanguine before marriage, you will simply become a married sanguine. For ladies, your surname changes but your personality remain the same until you consciously start working on yourself.
2. Marriage will not reduce the pressures you face
Marriage brings more pressure. It gets you busier. As a single, I had so much time to pray, especially long hours of praying in the Spirit. If I needed to pray for a long stretch of time now as a married man and a father, I have to disappear somewhere to do that.
You can be praying in your study, and you are so much lost in God’s glory, in fact, you are in the third heavens, with Shekinah glory all over you in your study, and then, your little boy or girl knocks furiously on the door saying, “Daddy, I want Biscuits!”
Trust me, you will need to come down from the third heavens back to the earth and hand that Biscuits to her so that she would not grow to hate your God that is taking Daddy away!
As single, you have all the time in the world now. Use it, because it will never get freer!
To be continued tomorrow…
CONFESSION FOR THE DAY I will not miss it in marriage.
PRAYER FOR THE DAY Lord, open my eyes to the realities of life.
THOUGHT FOR THE DAY Romans 14:17 [KJV]For the kingdom of God is not meat and drink; but righteousness, and peace, and joy in the Holy Ghost.
Husbands, by the position of headship they occupy determine to a large extent what happens in a marriage. They provide leadership for the marriage and dictate the direction the marriage goes. The husband should be responsible for charting the vision for the family.
In carrying out his task, there are certain things he should not engage in.
1. Don’t frustrate your wife.
You frustrate your wife when you don’t appreciate her efforts. A woman by default does a lot in terms of taking care of the home and the family. So if there is one thing the husband should do, it is constantly appreciating his wife.
2. Don’t keep secrets from your wife.
A lot of wives are really hurt over their husband not talking to them as a friend. It is very disheartening to know that your husband has secrets he is keeping from you. Some husband’s make certain amounts of money they don’t declare to their wives. Some have affairs and even have children from other women and their wives got to discover under unpleasant situations.
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3. Don’t cheat on your wife
Adultery and infidelity is the number one cause of separation and divorce in marriage. Do everything you have to do to avoid having an affair. When you cheat on your wife, you come against the covenant that bind you together and God is not pleased. You open the door for the devil to afflict the family and the children are exposed to all sort of negative things.
4. Don’t be a Boss in your marriage
When the husband takes the route of being the boss in the marriage, things will not work out the way they are meant to be. The wife is an help meet to the husband, but you forfeit her help when you treat her like you are her boss. It is a mutual relationship and the husband is meant to be a servant leader.
5. Don’t ‘shut down’ your wife
Your wife should never be shut down. Her opinions, view points and ideas should never be laid aside as irrelevant and stupid. The husband should recognize the fact that his wife is a gift from God to help, support and assist. Even if you are of different opinions, learn to respect your wife’s opinion and treat her suggestions as valuable even if you won’t be using her ideas.
God bless our marriages
CONFESSION OF THE DAY I don’t frustrate, keep secrets, cheat, shut down my wife.
PRAYER FOR THE DAY Lord, help me to be a servant leader
THOUGHT FOR THE DAY
1 Corinthians 13:4 Charity suffereth long, and is kind; charity envieth not; charity vaunteth not itself, is not puffed up,
ACTION PLAN FOR THE DAY Start practicing these things.
We can understand a bit of the mercy of God through this story. Jordan’s heart boomed in his chest as he stood looking at his mother. He didn’t mean to break the five bottles of freshly pressed orange juice meant for the women’s meeting at church tomorrow. One of the bottles sat on the bread wrapper and as he pulled the bread out from the fridge, disaster struck.
“I am sorry, mummy,” he said.
He waited for his punishment. He couldn’t meet her eyes as she looked long and hard at him.
“It’s okay” she said. “Just clean it up.”
That was it. He couldn’t believe his ears. Instantly, he got the mop and bucket and began to clean.
Minutes later, mummy hears Juliet crying. Jordan had hit her for removing one of the tires from his toy car. It was a mistake.
“But I didn’t do anything to you when you broke the bottles of juice?”
Jordan acted like the wicked servant in Matt. 18: 21-35 as told by Jesus.
The wicked servant refused to be merciful to his fellow servant after receiving mercy from his master. He owed his master more, compared to what his fellow servant owed him.
Much like Jordan’s mistake compared to his sister’s. He could have just told Juliet “It’s okay. Just fix it.” Much like mummy said to him.
Why do you think Jordan and the servant in the story acted as they did? They did so because they weren’t grateful for the mercy they received. They forgot that their offense was worth punishing for but who they offended decided they were worth not punishing.
The story teaches us two things:
Firstly, we should be grateful for God’s mercy because we’ve all come short of mercy. And it’s only through Jesus’ death on the cross that we have the right to receive mercy from God.
Secondly, as we have received this mercy, we are meant to reciprocate it to others ‘You should have mercy on your fellow-servant, just as I had mercy on you.’ Matt. 18:33.
What do you think mommy would do to Maxwell? Well, the master in the story was angry when he found out what happened and had the wicked servant thrown into jail until he could pay back what he owed Matt. 18: 34.
Jesus said that is how God will deal with us if we don’t have mercy on others.
Who are you going to forgive today?
Prayer: Dear God, I thank you for showing me mercy. Amen
Action point: Continually ask God to help you to do this continually.
Declaration: My children show mercy. They are considerate and loving to their neighbours.
9. That he showed you does not mean you should go ahead and propose. You also need to ask Him when to go ahead and propose. There is a difference between preparation and performance.
10. In the things of God, He often shows you things ahead. Because the information is coming from God, it would look like you should act immediately. But most of the time, it is never an immediate action. He showed Joseph some things that only came to pass several years later. David was anointed but never mounted the throne immediately. Some of these promises have to be patiently obtained.
11. It is possible to get a big ‘NO’ from a lady and yet God has spoken to you. You jumped ahead and did not follow His leading completely. The lady is not ready at the time. Just like God spoke to you, God has to speak to her too!
12. The primary way God will lead you is through inner witness. You just know within you. Do not seek dreams and visions because the devil can give them. Stay consistently in God’s word and pray in the Spirit a lot. That way, God will ensure that you don’t miss it in life.
13. It is one thing for God to speak to you about a person. That does not mean it will work out or lead into marriage, especially if you unrepentantly compromise regularly, or you did not work at your relationship in terms of character development.
For example, God might have spoken to you, and yet anger problems can ruin it all.
God might have spoken, but negative attitudes can stifle that voice and the love can vaporize as quickly as it came.
I pray for you this morning, your life will not become an experiment. You will enjoy God’s leading in every area of your life in Jesus name.
CONFESSION FOR THE DAY I will hear God clearly about my life and marriage.
PRAYER FOR THE DAY Pray for the spirit of discernment.
THOUGHT FOR THE DAY Isa 30:21[AMP] And your ears will hear a word behind you, saying, This is the way; walk in it, when you turn to the right hand and when you turn to the left.
ACTION PLAN FOR THE DAY What did God say to you today? Write it down.
