Two Indications That A Marriage Might Crash

Two Indications That A Marriage Might Crash

Reading Time: 2 minutes

Two Indications That A Marriage Might Crash. Our Marriages will not crash in Jesus’ name. However, there are indications or tendencies we should guard against.

These indications are sure signals that marriage will crash.

Two Indications That A Marriage Might Crash. What are they?

1. When the couple lives in deception
No marriage can be built on deception. Deception is a sandy, fragile, frail, and flaky foundation that would seem to hold a marriage for a while, but will give in, and crash eventually. 

Deception brings with it, false promises and this even becomes intense when both husband and wife are deceiving and lying to each other.

It is a matter of time before the loud crash is heard around and beyond. 

Pro 27:6 (KJV)  Faithful are the wounds of a friend; but the kisses of an enemy are deceitful.

It is even worse if the couple knows they are in deception, and they keep encouraging each other rather than seeking help.

2. When the couple lives in isolation
A couple that lives in isolation will die in desolation.

It is not a curse, it is a predictable end.

A couple that has nobody speaking into their lives is at risk.

There must be a place you are drawing from.

Who can you report your spouse to?

If there is nobody, something is not quite right. 

Who mentors your marriage?

Whose marriage models yours?

Find that person prayerfully and stop fighting alone.

There are battles you can fight for days in a marriage that could have been ended by wisdom in a few statements in the heart of someone around you.

Pro 25:12 (KJV)  As an earring of gold, and an ornament of fine gold, so is a wise reprover upon an obedient ear.

A wise reprover is likened to precious jewelry with which you adorn yourself and come out beautifully.

Do you want a beautiful marriage?

Do you desire a beautiful home?

Then my question is, “who is your wise reprover?”

If you have none, then prayerfully find one together and agree on being mentored.

May God give you more understanding! These are the Two Indications That A Marriage Might Crash

Be blessed!

CONFESSION FOR THE DAY
I will go for wisdom 

PRAYER FOR THE DAY
Pray that God will lead you to the right mentor  

THOUGHT FOR THE DAY
Pro 25:12 (MSG)  And a wise friend’s timely reprimand is like a gold ring slipped on your finger.

ACTION PLAN FOR THE DAY
Have a heart-to-heart talk with your spouse 

BIBLE READING
Romans 11

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This Dream Requires Your Prayers

This Dream Requires Your Prayers

Reading Time: 2 minutes

This Dream Requires Your Prayers. Today’s devotionals are basically the same, for singles and married, because of the significance of the message. Dreams and visions are valid languages of God through which He often chooses to communicate to us. The Holy Spirit will reveal and bring warnings as needs be from time to time.

You will recall that Joseph had dreams. You will also recall that Joseph had a dream in which He was instructed to run away with Jesus. Have you ever thought why God would ask Joseph to run away as against protecting them without having to run?

Peter had a trance in Acts 10

It was somewhat of unrest and I am calling on us to Let’s Pray Against Unrest In Nigeria

People and vehicles were still able to move about but in panic. I saw crowds. I saw people running and trying to escape from something. What it was, I don’t know exactly.

I saw people crushed under the weight of others running and trying to escape.

I saw people fall into ditches and sink below the ground. There was pandemonium. There were a few deaths here and there.

It looked like unrest, not a war situation. Riots and unrest, and the accompanying violence and looting that follows.

People were kind of animated and excited, and yet you could see fear and panic at the same time. It was also a picture of confusion. Maybe you want to call it civil unrest. However, there were casualties. 

I believe strongly this is a prophetic dream. This Dream Requires Your Prayers.

This is calling on the body of Christ to pray! This kind of dream will come because God wants us to pray to avert the plans of the devil at such a time as this.

While I will in no way impose my convictions on people, I feel strongly that God is asking the body of Christ to pray about this!

May our nation be preserved in God. May God give us a leader after His own heart!

May Nigeria be great again! This Dream Requires Your Prayers.

CONFESSION FOR THE DAY
We will not be thrown into confusion 

PRAYER FOR THE DAY
Lord, heal our Nation

THOUGHT FOR THE DAY
2Ch 7:14 (KJV) If my people, which are called by my name, shall humble themselves, and pray, and seek my face, and turn from their wicked ways; then will I hear from heaven, and will forgive their sin, and will heal their land.

ACTION PLAN FOR THE DAY
Pray for Nigeria 

BIBLE READING FOR THE DAY
2Ch 7

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Ten Good Habits of Great Couples

Ten Good Habits of Great Couples

Reading Time: 3 minutes

Ten Good Habits of Great Couples. A lot of married couples are often caught up in the hustles and bustles of life and become distracted. Here is a reminder list of what you should do regularly to each other and how to go about it.

Ten Good Habits of Great Couples.
1. The Praying Couple

Pray for her. Let it be genuine. This helps you to harness the help of God to come to bear for you.

2. The Calling Couple
Whether you will see each other later in the day is not the issue, the issue is that communication is the live wire of any relationship or marriage that will survive. Keep in touch. Send SMS. Use chats.

3. The Exchanging Couple
It doesn’t have to be expensive! But let it be touching. Notice what I wrote, exchange gifts; not collect gifts! Those little gestures help to keep the fire of your relationship and marriage aflame.

4. The Sharing Couple
Share with him or her what God is dealing with you in His word.
Whatever God tells you in your devotion or in your personal walk with God, will also bless him or her as long as it blesses you.

5. The Encouraging Couple
You are his number-one fan. You are her number-one fan. Don’t discourage each other. Don’t dissipate your energy on criticism. Be aware that your input goes a long way because you are the closest person.

6. The Forgiving Couple
Forgive each other so that your heavenly father will forgive you also. You are not perfect, are you? So don’t become a judge, rather lovingly overlook and forget any mistakes that are meant to show up.

7. The Correcting Couple
Do you know it takes up to nine affirming statements to be able to accommodate and see one criticism as it should be seen? But you know what people do is give nine brutally critical statements and one of none of affirming statements. It will not yield any positive result like that.

8. The Obedient Couple
Seek to help each other in obeying God’s instructions. You are the greatest influence. Don’t encourage him or her to sin. Stand on the path of truth and help him or her to resist temptations.

9. The Balanced Couple
Don’t feed each other’s weaknesses. Rather, you should balance him or her out, because you will always have strength in areas where he or she is weak. Be available to help him stand. Be there to help her say No to iniquity. Don’t be seen as a partner in crime, or partner in iniquity. Let him or her be able to say, I trust my spouse; he will never compromise. Trust one another and protect your trust.

10. The Accountable Couple
Be accountable together. Make sure you have a mentor you talk to from time to time. Sometimes, very intense issues and disagreements are dissolved with a few statements. Well, that is the grace of God upon our lives and upon this ministry; to provide positive intervention in crisis-laden marriages and to provide godly counsel for those in courtship. Accountability to those who have done what you are trying to do is a lot of wisdom. Stay close to these devotionals that have been succor to a lot of marriages and relationships across the world, discuss them from time to time and keep on making adjustments! So help us, God! These are the Ten Good Habits of Great Couples. 

CONFESSION FOR THE DAY
I respect my spouse out of respect and honor for God.

PRAYER FOR THE DAY
God, I receive grace to love my spouse in my relationship.

THOUGHT FOR THE DAY
Eph 4:27 (KJV)  Neither give place to the devil.

ACTION PLAN FOR THE DAY
Find practical ways to be a great couple

BIBLE READING
Matthew 18

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Identifying The Wrong Voices In Marriage

Identifying The Wrong Voices In Marriage

Reading Time: 3 minutes

Identifying The Wrong Voices In Marriage. God is a good God. God speaks to us. The devil is a bad devil. He also attempts to speak to us. That is why the scripture declares:

Joh 10:4-5 (MKJV) And when he puts forth his own sheep, he goes before them, and the sheep follow him. For they know his voice. [5] And they will not follow a stranger, but will flee from him, for they do not know the voice of strangers.

As children of God, God speaks to us as a father will speak to his children. When we listen to His voice, we will not get into problems. When we disregard His voice, we start listening to another voice. The moment we don’t flee or run away from that voice, we get into a serious mess.

When we make up our minds to listen to God and fill our hearts with His word daily and consistently, we will not listen or take heed to the voice of the evil one. That is why the way Jesus refuted and refused to listen to the voice of the devil during the temptation was to speak out God’s word. Three times he was tempted, three times he said, ‘It is written…’ What if he doesn’t know what is written?

This morning, by the Spirit of God, I want to identify ten areas where we might have been listening to the wrong voice. It comes in subtle ways mostly.

The devil often uses people and situations to speak to us. We must be careful. Here are the people and voices the devil often uses.

Identifying The Wrong Voices In marriage.

1. The user’s voice
I can marry her, but I don’t have to be committed to her

2. The deceiver’s  voice
I don’t have to let my spouse know everything, or else the marriage can be jeopardized.

3. The religious voice
Everybody has a lover somewhere, God must accommodate that or we will all go to hell.

4. The foolish voice
As long as I have a prophet somewhere that I consult and prays for me, I can continue with my lifestyle.

5. The sensual voice
I am not sure of my spouse’s commitment. I can as well explore and also live my life.

6. The greedy voice
I can collect money from him to help my spouse. After all, it’s for the family. It’s for us and that can be a secret. If I don’t do it, we will be hungry.

7. The unbeliever’s  voice
My family does not need Jesus. I have enough money. It is poor and hungry people that go around praying.
Are you Identifying The Wrong Voices In Marriage already?

8. The self-righteous voice
I don’t want my family to be fanatical. We don’t have to go to church. The church is full of hypocrites.

9. The carnal voice
I serve God passionately and I give. But God knows that addictions cannot really go like that. I will keep on working on it and one day God might even give me a sign to stop.

10. The confused voice
The only way to keep this man married to me is to allow him have his way with other ladies out there. As long as he doesn’t bring them home, he can do whatever he wants. Life is give and take, I can’t be policing him around, since he doesn’t disturb me from doing what I am doing.

Well, all the above statements are defective These types of statements are defective statements indicative and symptomatic of deeper spiritual problems. They are belief systems that are sure to crack and leave you cracked. That will not be your portion in Jesus’ name.

If you are married, and one or more of the above seems to be the scenario, you will need to pray a lot for God’s help and intervention and then seek counseling as well.

In life, God has laid out His principles and when we deviate from them, things will not work out however we try because the scripture cannot be broken! In any way where you seem lacking, God will forgive, forget, redeem and restore as necessary when you genuinely repent.

Why not call upon Him this morning?

CONFESSION FOR THE DAY
I will not be confused

PRAYER FOR THE DAY
Lord, give me a sensitive heart  

THOUGHT FOR THE DAY
Eph 4:27 (KJV)   Neither give place to the devil.

ACTION PLAN FOR THE DAY
Refuse to listen to or entertain the wrong voice

BIBLE READING
Matthew 17

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Tender Loving Care For Married Couples

Tender Loving Care For Married Couples

Reading Time: 2 minutes

Tender Loving Care For Married Couples. In the below verse, there are three instructions that I believe every married couple should take cognizance of.

Eph 4:32 (KJV)  
And be ye kind one to another, tenderhearted, forgiving one another, even as God for Christ’s sake hath forgiven you.

1. Be kind to one another

2. Be tenderhearted.

3. Forgive one another 

These three instructions will go a long way to help couples in relating with one another and also help in managing a lot of issues.

A kind husband living with a kind wife will minimize unnecessary quarrels. This is what Tender Loving Care For Married Couples is all about

Then it says to be tender-hearted. 

That is, let your hearts be tender towards each other. 

Do you know how a mother is tender towards a day-old baby?

How does she handle her, feed her, carry her and nurture her? 

What if you are tender this way to your loved one?

You won’t shout at each other.

The husband will never lift his hands against his wife.

The wife will never use abusive words on her husband.

Then it talks about forgiving one another.

And this is powerful.

Don’t be bitter towards each other. Forgive easily and quickly.

Take a look at the Message translation:

Eph 4:32 (MSG)  
Be gentle with one another, sensitive. Forgive one another as quickly and thoroughly as God in Christ forgave you.

Be gentle.

Be sensitive.

Let forgiveness be quick and thorough.

Do not forgive halfway. 

Finally, let’s take a look at the amplified Version:

Eph 4:32 (AMP)  
And become useful and helpful and kind to one another, tenderhearted (compassionate, understanding, loving-hearted), forgiving one another [ readily and freely ], as God in Christ forgave you.

Take a look at the words used.

Compassionate. Understanding. Loving.

This attitude will eliminate screaming at each other, shouting at each other, being at each other’s neck, being vindictive, being in strife, being violent at each other, and speaking wrong words at each other. This is Tender Loving Care For Married Couples

I pray that God will grant us more understanding.

I pray for your marriages, that God will abate every storm and crush every opposition in Jesus name!

The plans of the devil over your marriage are destroyed in Jesus’ name!

Be blessed!

CONFESSION FOR THE DAY
I will love my spouse with tender loving care 

PRAYER FOR THE DAY
Lord, give us a tender heart 

THOUGHT FOR THE DAY
Luke 1:78   (CEV) God’s love and kindness will shine upon us like the sun that rises in the sky.

ACTION PLAN FOR THE DAY
Give your spouse some TLC!

BIBLE READING 
Matthew 16

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Know These And Know Peace In Marriage

Know These And Know Peace In Marriage

Reading Time: 2 minutes

Know These And Know Peace In Marriage. I want to talk about two crucial things in marriage. They are pivotal to a smooth relationship as couples. Let’s dive into it.

Know These And Know Peace In Marriage

1. Renewal and Recharge Junctions

In marriage, you must learn to take breaks from work and relax. You have to have time that you spend together as husband and wife.

You need to go back to what used to excite you before the wedding and do those things again and again.

Apart from reading your Bible and praying in the Holy Ghost which refreshes and recharges your spirit, you should also learn to be relaxed once in a while.

2. Mentoring  

Every marriage must have a mentor to whom you defer and seek wisdom.

There is something that a couple that has been married for thirty years knows that a three-year-old couple is oblivious of.

It is plain wisdom to seek counsel.

Most issues that lead to serious strife and possible separation and divorce could easily have been resolved by seeking knowledge.

That is why I am a little scared of couples who talk to nobody! Something is not quite right with that.  Part of having a marriage mentor is being humble.

3. Sincerity and Openness 

Finally, this is so crucial to the survival of any marriage! Be open

Marriage is not a secret cult! Talk about everything and anything.

Hiding things and allowing your spouse to discover will only lead to mistrust and suspicion. The rule of the game is to talk about everything. That will go a long way to establishing trust. Know These And Know Peace In Marriage

If you keep talking exactly how it is, it would be difficult to go into adultery, because adultery is perpetuated in the platform of insincerity and deception. May God help us all. 

CONFESSION FOR THE DAY
I have God’s wisdom in my marriage 

PRAYER FOR THE DAY
Lord, give us a humble heart  

THOUGHT FOR THE DAY
Psa 51:10 (KJV) Create in me a clean heart, O God; and renew a right spirit within me.

ACTION PLAN FOR THE DAY
Discuss on mentorship and agree

READ THROUGH THE BIBLE IN ONE YEAR 
Mark 7

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Communication Is So Important In Marriage

Communication Is So Important In Marriage

Reading Time: 2 minutes

Communication Is So Important In Marriage. I started writing yesterday on things that should be present in every marriage and we looked at one thing yesterday. Today we look at four more things. 

The second thing that must be present in every marriage that will succeed has to do with communication.

Communication Is So Important In Marriage. Constant Communication. A man was once asked what the three most important things in a marriage are.

His response:

1. Communication
2. Communication
3. Communication

Do I agree? Yes, I fully do!

When communication dies, assumptions, suspicions, lies, and deception will take over.

There is nothing as beautiful as a marriage where both parties can fully express themselves.
Hear each other out!

When a man talks, his goal may be a logical explanation, but when a woman talks, it is more than an explanation, it is a release; an emotional release.

So every time she is muted, there are pent-up tensions being stored up for a later time. 

It is akin to the molten magma within, nothing shows on the surface much, but one day, the magma can no longer hold still, and there will be a volcanic eruption causing untold havoc!

Unexplained hurts, unexpressed bitterness, are all like the molten magma in the belly of the ground.

So, when you tell your spouse to “shut up” continually, and it looks as though you are in charge and winning, well, you are not really winning, you are actually losing!

Allow free expression in your matrimonial home.

When a lady is also reluctant to talk or communicate, it shows some deeper issues as well.

Both husband and wife have to be committed to communication. The excuse of temperaments should not be brought in.

Well, people at work, in church, or elsewhere can look at you and say you are a quiet person, but your spouse should be able to say “you are not quiet to them!” This shows they are friends!

Make the commitment to be friends and to keep talking. Communication Is So Important In Marriage.

CONFESSION FOR THE DAY
I will keep communicating with my spouse

PRAYER FOR THE DAY
Lord, help me to work on areas where I am lacking 

THOUGHT FOR THE DAY
Mat 12:35 (MSG) A good person produces good deeds and words season after season. An evil person is a blight on the orchard.

ACTION PLAN FOR THE DAY
Have a time out with your spouse 

READ THROUGH THE BIBLE IN ONE YEAR
Matthew 12

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This Must Be Present in Every Marriage

This Must Be Present in Every Marriage

Reading Time: 2 minutes

This Must Be Present in Every Marriage. A lot of things must be implemented for a marriage to succeed. 

Conscious and deliberate inputs must be in place so the marriage can bring bliss and not blisters.

Here is one of them

Prayers. This Must Be Present in Every Marriage.

A family that prays together stays together.

A husband and wife that pray together will overcome the flesh easily.

Prayer protects, shields, and connects you to your inheritance in God.

As husband and wife, pray for one another rather than tear one another apart.

Intercede for each other. 

What the devil wants is a tearing apart, do not cooperate with him. 

Wake up in the middle of the night and pray together.

The power of agreement is better harnessed as a couple.

In the first few years of our marriage, my wife and I would wake up by 12.00 am and pray in the Spirit.

I am persuaded that those prayers advanced our lives and ministries. 

There is a purpose for coming together in marriage.

It is not just for making love and then dying at the age of ninety. 

There is a purpose in the heart of God.

That purpose is not to be decided, it is to be discovered.

When you discover that purpose, you just stepped into your wealthy place.

You can only discover in the place of prayers. 

The devil will do all he knows to make sure you don’t pray.

You will notice that each time you decide to pray, something else will interrupt it. Those are not natural. The devil doesn’t want you to pray at all. Prayer-less couples will leave so many cracks and loopholes open for the devil to explore.

The devil will not access your marriage. Your marriage will be preserved in Jesus’ name!

Do not let anything interfere with your prayer times. May God help you and your spouse in Jesus’ name

Be blessed!

CONFESSION FOR THE DAY
I will respect my loved one

PRAYER FOR THE DAY
Lord, give us a humble heart  

THOUGHT FOR THE DAY
Jas 4:7 (KJV)  Submit yourselves therefore to God. Resist the devil, and he will flee from you.

ACTION PLAN FOR THE DAY
Start praying together if you weren’t doing that 

READ THROUGH THE BIBLE IN ONE YEAR 
John 6

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Six Things Husbands Expect From Wives

Six Things Husbands Expect From Wives

Reading Time: 2 minutes

Six Things Husbands Expect From Wives. This will give wives an idea of what husbands want from them

1. The Issue of Respect
We all know that respect is the greatest need of a man. Every wife should strive to honor and respect her husband.

This will go a long way to make your husband honor you as well because you always reap what you sow

2. The Issue of Support in Career/Ministry/Business
My wife should be my greatest and Number one fan of course!

As a wife, you should support, encourage and strengthen your husband to go forth and fulfill destiny and purpose.

3. The issue of Prayers and Intercession
Women are powerful prayers. The genuine prayers of a happy wife will advance a man’s life in no small measure.

Wives, pray for your husband!

4. The Issue of caring, homeliness, and love
A woman who is not homely shows no care and detests cooking will be a constant source of frustration to the husband.

There is something in women that makes caring natural for them

5. The issue of beauty and looking good always
All men are moved by sight including me! So, I expect my wife to look good always. Women, do not get careless with your appearance and your looks.

Look your best all the time!

6. The issue of keeping the bedroom hot!
Sexual satisfaction is paramount to any marriage that will not collapse. Wives, do not get careless in this area. Never use sex as a reward or punishment. These are the Six Things Husbands Expect From Wives

It is an obligation!
1Co 7:5 (AMP)  Do not refuse and deprive and defraud each other [ of your due marital rights ], except perhaps by mutual consent for a time, so that you may devote yourselves unhindered to prayer. But afterwards resume marital relations, lest Satan tempt you [ to sin ] through your lack of restraint of sexual desire.

Be blessed!

CONFESSION FOR THE DAY
I am a good spouse

PRAYER FOR THE DAY
Lord, make my heart right   

THOUGHT FOR THE DAY
1Co 7:5 (MSG)  Abstaining from sex is permissible for a period of time if you both agree to it, and if it’s for the purposes of prayer and fasting—but only for such times. Then come back together again. Satan has an ingenious way of tempting us when we least expect it.

ACTION PLAN FOR THE DAY
Give your spouse a special treat 

READ THROUGH THE BIBLE IN ONE YEAR 
Matthew 13

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One Thing Married Couples Should Avoid

One Thing Married Couples Should Avoid

Reading Time: 3 minutes

One Thing Married Couples Should Avoid. At the meeting of married couples I facilitated sometimes back outside the country, I was asked whether married couples can view pornography since they are already married. My response was No!

“Pastor, why would you say so? At least, we are married, and we can do anything in the sanctity of our marriage!”

James 1:14-15 But each one is tempted when he is carried away and enticed by his own lust. Then when lust has conceived, it gives birth to sin; and when sin is accomplished, it brings forth death.

Well, here are a few reasons why I would not advocate that you bring viewing pornography into your marriage.

  1. There is a spirit behind pornography

The strongman of perversion is behind pornography. When you start viewing pornography, single or married, you open yourself or your home to the influence of these spirits. 

There will be what is called transference of spirits. And you will not like the consequences of that, especially years later. 

When a two-year-old who has not been exposed to anything sexual whatsoever, start humping against the wall or against a teddy bear, you can guess where the inspiration is coming from.

Everything carries a spirit. You wouldn’t want those wrong spirits messing up your home.

Avoid soft porn, Kama-Sutra, and some disguised pornography. It is a subtle attempt of the devil to have an in-road into your precious family. Do not cooperate with the devil in that area!

2. It would suck you in the more
The second reason is the fact that it will not only get your heart dirty with all the sadistic and demonic drama, but it will also come with a strong pull at your heart.

The possibility of addiction is so strong that if you are not careful, sex will be incomplete until you have watched pornography. After a while, regular pornography will not satisfy you, and there will be a pull towards more unimaginable perversion like bestiality, bondage, and submission dimensions!

You will start exploring sexual toys! All these terrains are not the way to go for a believer!

It has the capacity not only to mess up your sex life but to destroy the marriage and also to mess up your relationship with God. This is One Thing Married Couples Should Avoid

3. There will be a comparison
Your spouse would be placed under undue pressure of performance of all you have seen and watched. 

What you fail to realize, however, is that all the drama and sexual antics are mostly done under the effect of drugs, so powerful to numb every dignity out of a human!

It will be so unfair and almost bothering on wickedness to ask your wife to act out what you see in pornography. 

You might be violating her conscience, and yours as well and then eventually awakening the liberty for her to cheat on you as a result of all you watch together.

You need to know that what you see is acted. They are performing for the screen and money!

Forced to act enjoying what is humanly debilitating! Well, I will stop here this morning! I want to believe you have been blessed with this topic “One Thing Married Couples Should Avoid”

Remain blessed!

CONFESSION FOR THE DAY
I refuse every form of perversion

PRAYER FOR THE DAY
Lord, set me free from all forms of bondage in the mind     

THOUGHT FOR THE DAY
Mat 5:28 (MSG)  But don’t think you’ve preserved your virtue simply by staying out of bed. Your heart can be corrupted by lust even quicker than your body. Those leering looks you think nobody notices—they also corrupt.

ACTION PLAN FOR THE DAY
Take out every pornographic item from your house and destroy them

READ THROUGH THE BIBLE IN ONE YEAR
Nehemiah 11

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You Don’t Have Much Time!

You Don’t Have Much Time!

Reading Time: 3 minutes

You Don’t Have Much Time! Sometimes back, in not too much of a distant past, God gave us a boy. So tiny, so little, I could carry him with one of my palms. Fast forward to now, the guy is presently serving with NYSC.

Everything was fast! In a couple of years, I would easily and successfully become a grandpa! What? I am still trying to feel like a dad and now the grand dad thing is beckoning gently!

The scripture says:
Eph 5:15-16 (KJV) 
See then that ye walk circumspectly, not as fools, but as wise,  [16]  Redeeming the time, because the days are evil.

The Message Translation puts it this way:

Eph 5:15-16 (MSG) 
So watch your step. Use your head.  [16]  Make the most of every chance you get. These are desperate times!

Dear husband and wife, this is the time to work together.  This is the time to make the most of every chance you have.

Don’t use half of your lifetime quarreling, settling quarrels, getting in and out of strife, living in perpetual suspicion, and never harnessing the power that lies in the prayer of agreement.

The scripture makes us understand that as husband and wife, your productivity is supposed to mount up in leaps and bounds.

You are supposed to get better in a divine synergy that will touch lives around you.

This requires you to make up your mind to avoid unnecessary quarrels, stay out of strife and forgive quickly.

Not talking to each other for weeks, picking quarrels at every instance, and trying to change your spouse are all energy wasters. You Don’t Have Much Time!

Take a look more at this:
Rom 13:11 (MSG) 
But make sure that you don’t get so absorbed and exhausted in taking care of all your day-by-day obligations that you lose track of the time and doze off, oblivious to God.

Never get so absorbed in other things at the expense of God

It is only with God that your time can be maximized. 

It further says:

Rom 13:12 (MSG)  
The night is about over, dawn is about to break. Be up and awake to what God is doing! God is putting the finishing touches on the salvation work he began when we first believed.

The night is about to be over!

You don’t have much time, do you?

That dream that lies in the pages of your diary, gathering dust on the shelf, when will you give birth to it.? The pregnancy of aspirations you have carried for years when will deliver?

I think it is about time!
Finally look at this:

Rom 13:13 (MSG)  We can’t afford to waste a minute, must not squander these precious daylight hours in frivolity and indulgence, in sleeping around and dissipation, in bickering and grabbing everything in sight.

Work together as a husband and wife and let the glory that is embedded in the purpose for which you came together come into reality!

The price to pay is to decide to follow God, forgive easily, love each other unconditionally and pray more!

I pray sincerely for you this morning!

God will strengthen you to work together and fulfill your destiny!

The reason for which you came together as a family will become a reality in Jesus’ name! Remember, You Don’t Have Much Time!

Be blessed!

CONFESSION FOR THE DAY
We will be productive 

PRAYER FOR THE DAY
Lord, keep us together

THOUGHT FOR THE DAY
Rom 13:12 (CEV)  
Night is almost over, and day will soon appear. We must stop behaving as people do in the dark and be ready to live in the light.

ACTION PLAN FOR THE DAY
Have a hearty discussion 

READ THROUGH THE BIBLE IN ONE YEAR
Rom 13

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How To Leave And Cleave To Your Spouse

How To Leave And Cleave To Your Spouse

Reading Time: 2 minutes

How To Leave And Cleave To Your Spouse. The words “Leave” and “Cleave” stand out in the verses we are considering today. An understanding of those words will greatly help us in our marriage!

Gen 2:24 (KJV)  
Therefore shall a man leave his father and his mother, and shall cleave unto his wife: and they shall be one flesh.

The word “Leave” means to loosen, relinquish, permit, and forsake

It is a total departure.

But it is never a disconnection.

The man has to do the leaving.

Without leaving, there will never be a successful marriage.

All undue interference and control from the parents must be minimized.

The word “Cleave” means cling or adhere; to catch by pursuit: – abide, follow close (hard, after), be joined (together), and pursue hard

Allegiance must shift from parents to your wife. 

This is what marriage is.

Your wife comes first on the wedding day.

Your spouse becomes your priority.

Your mum is another man’s wife, not your wife.

 Your own wife must be your priority.

Cleaving means to catch by pursuit, so you never stop pursuing your wife.

You keep at it, even after the wedding.

In the pursuit lies the cleaving.

The man is to cleave unto HIS OWN wife!

An attempt to cleave to another man’s wife will usher in a marital crisis.

 It also means to follow close.

Be joined and connected to her emotionally and otherwise.

When things seem not to be going right, you don’t quit.

This is How To Leave And Cleave To Your Spouse

You don’t pack your stuff and start singing songs of divorce when there is a little provocation.

This is what cleaving is.

It is just like your relationship with God.

You are to cleave unto Him and not try to leave when things seem not to be going your own way.

Leaving God and refusing to cleave will complicate issues, and that is the same thing in marriage.

You are to cleave for life!

Any attempt to leave is a tearing part that would be painful. 

Stay with each other no matter what.

Cleaving means that you are dedicated to each other.

It means sharing with each other on the deepest level.

It means enjoying each other and supplying warmth for yourselves. This is How To Leave And Cleave To Your Spouse

Ecc 4:11 (KJV) 
Again, if two lie together, then they have heat: but how can one be warm alone?

 I pray that God will grant understanding.

Your marriage will not suffer a crisis.

Your marriage will not lose that godly steam.

I pray that God will pour new wine into your marriage and cause the love between you to come alive!

Have a great day!

CONFESSION FOR THE DAY
I will cleave to my spouse

PRAYER FOR THE DAY
Lord, help to leave completely and cleave fully to my spouse   

THOUGHT FOR THE DAY 
Ecc 4:11 (CEV)  If you sleep alone, you won’t have anyone to keep you warm on a cold night4

ACTION PLAN FOR THE DAY
Cleave to your spouse in a special way today

READ THROUGH THE BIBLE IN ONE YEAR 
Gen 2

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Building Intimacy By Meeting Needs

Building Intimacy By Meeting Needs

Reading Time: 2 minutes

Building Intimacy By Meeting Needs. There cannot be intimacy where needs are not met. We are drawn to ourselves more when we meet each other’s need. Women have needs that are so different from the needs of men. These needs are very genuine and you grow intimately when you focus on meeting these specific needs. 

Basically, we meet our spouse’s needs by speaking their love language. What is the language your spouse is speaking right now? We have different needs per time. Are you meeting those needs by speaking his/her love language? Be committed to Building Intimacy By Meeting Needs.

For example, a husband feels he’s working hard to provide for the wife while the wife may need him to just be around her at the time because she’s going through a lot of emotions or maybe she needs him to be a friend.

You may have been working hard in the wrong direction.

The husband may get angry, frustrated, and disappointed that she’s not being grateful. It is not that she’s ungrateful, it’s just that you have not spoken her love language and have not met her needs.

 This can lead to arguments and quarrels. If it is not handled well, the couple can begin to drift apart. Especially if good communication is not encouraged. This can be resolved by finding out and trying to understand why he/she is not happy when you feel they should be excited.

Note that you cannot meet the needs you don’t know anything about. Both husband and wife must be committed to communication. There is nothing like, “I am the quiet type!” You are to strive and commit to talking all the time to keep communication alive. This is what Building Intimacy By Meeting Needs entails.

Your marriage will thrive.

CONFESSION FOR THE DAY
I am intentional about being intimate with my spouse. I am careful to notice what their needs are and I meet those needs.

PRAYERS FOR THE DAY
Help me Lord to grow in my intimacy with my spouse.

THOUGHT FOR THE DAY
And Adam said: “This is now bone of my bones And flesh of my flesh; She shall be called Woman, Because she was taken out of Man.” Therefore a man shall leave his father and mother and be joined to his wife, and they shall become one flesh”. Gen 2:23-24 NKJV

ACTION PLAN FOR THE DAY 
Be intentional about being intimate with your spouse. Seek to know what love language your spouse is speaking par time and meet their needs.

BIBLE READING FOR THE DAY
Gen 2

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How To Build Intimacy Intentionally

How To Build Intimacy Intentionally

Reading Time: 2 minutes

How To Build Intimacy Intentionally. This is a very interesting topic and I hope we all are ready to learn one or two things. For our marriage to work and be blissful, we have to invest in knowledge. Knowledge is very important in the issue of marriage.

Men and women are so different. We have to humble ourselves to learn and keep on learning.

The whole concept of marriage is for intimacy. Intimacy simply means “into me see, into my needs, or a deep connection between spouses”. It is when two people become one flesh. 

Gen 2:23 -25 And Adam said: “This is now bone of my bones And flesh of my flesh; She shall be called Woman, Because she was taken out of Man.” Therefore a man shall leave his father and mother and be joined to his wife, and they shall become one flesh. And they were both naked, the man and his wife, and were not ashamed. 

Many people build their marriage on different things e.g. kids, career, fame, ministry, and so on, whereas we should build our marriages on our relationships with one another. 

The kids will grow and go, what happens to our relationship with each other?

Marriage is meant to survive anything where there is intimacy. It can survive infertility, infidelity, lack, poverty, health challenges, or interference. Interference of in-laws or third parties thrives in a marriage without intimacy. 

The bond and covenant of marriage are strong enough to withstand any of these pressures.

When we build intimacy in our marriage that’s when we begin to enjoy the rewards of unity. Where we begin to have great rewards, we begin to chase 10,000 more as a couple.

How do we build intimacy in our relationship? Let’s look at the acronym ‘INTIMACY’.

How To Build Intimacy Intentionally

1. INTENTIONAL

We cannot build intimacy in our marriage without being intentional. We don’t become one at the altar on the wedding day. We are pronounced ‘one’ and then go through the process of becoming one which involves the two spouses.

No marriage suddenly breaks; couples gradually drift apart.

Love can die. If love can grow then it can also die. We have to be intentional about keeping love ablaze. 

As powerful as fire is, something has to keep it burning. Such is the passion of love. We start a marriage with emotional love where we love almost unconsciously. 

As the marriage grows, we need to be intentional and conscious about loving our spouses, knowing them, meeting their deepest needs, and being there for them.

Good couples become intimate by chance but great couples become intimate by choice. This is How To Build Intimacy Intentionally

CONFESSION FOR THE DAY
I am intentional about being intimate with my spouse. I am careful to notice what their needs are and I meet those needs.

PRAYERS FOR THE DAY
Help me Lord to grow in my intimacy with my spouse.

THOUGHT FOR THE DAY
And Adam said: “This is now bone of my bones And flesh of my flesh; She shall be called Woman, Because she was taken out of Man.” Therefore a man shall leave his father and mother and be joined to his wife, and they shall become one flesh”. Gen 2:23-24 NKJV

ACTION PLAN FOR THE DAY 
Be intentional about being intimate with your spouse. Seek to know what love language your spouse is speaking par time and meet their needs.

BIBLE READING FOR THE DAY
Gen 2

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Here Are Reasons Why Affairs Happen

Here Are Reasons Why Affairs Happen

Reading Time: 2 minutes

Here Are Reasons Why Affairs Happen. Bode has been starved of sex in his matrimonial home. His wife, Sandy feels justified to “close shop” for him because she suspected he was cheating on her. This even increased his vulnerability and drove him more into the hands of the daughters of Eve who have been itching to have him! Why do affairs happen?

A major point of conflict between couples has to do with adultery! This does not have to do with those without the church alone. There is adultery within the church as well.

An affair can be defined as a sexual relationship, romantic friendship, or passionate attachment between two people without the knowledge of the other spouse.

Nobody is immune to having an affair. Nothing can justify having an experience. God frowns at it.

Why do affairs happen?

Once we can know the root cause, the solution is not far-fetched.

Here Are Reasons Why Affairs Happen
1. Warning and Wake-Up Call
Some people have affairs in other to simply “warn” their spouse and tell them what they are capable of doing. Can you beat that?

When you try to warn or get back to your spouse through an affair, the consequences that follow are really not pleasant.

Pro 6:32-33 (MSG)
Adultery is a brainless act, soul-destroying, self-destructive;  [33]  Expect a bloody nose, a black eye, and a reputation ruined for good.

2. The Needs
When the sexual and emotional needs of either party are not met, it could lead to an affair.

As couples, strive to satisfy each other’s needs as much as you can.

It helps to reduce the vulnerability that arises as a result of unmet needs.

3. A Bruised Ego
This may sound ridiculous, but men often have affairs to repair broken-down egos!

At the same time, this may sound “valid” to men, but affairs are still wrong and always come with attendant consequences.

There is never a “good reason” for adultery! The after-effects care less why it happened.

Wives, don’t deliberately bruise your husband’s ego.

Instead, massage it, and protect it. Here Are Reasons Why Affairs Happen

May God grant you more understanding in Jesus’ name.

CONFESSION FOR THE DAY
I will not be trapped

PRAYER FOR THE DAY
Lord, shield my marriage from all evils   

THOUGHT FOR THE DAY
Pro 6:32 (GW)
Whoever commits adultery with a woman has no sense. Whoever does this destroys himself.

ACTION PLAN FOR THE DAY
Set boundaries to prevent affairs

BIBLE READING FOR THE DAY
Prov 6

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What Husbands and Wives Are To Build

What Husbands and Wives Are To Build

Reading Time: 2 minutes

What Husbands and Wives Are To Build. Let’s start with the wife. Women are powerful.

To show you how powerful women are, the Bible never says a man builds a home. It says a woman builds.

Pro 14:1 (KJV)
Every wise woman buildeth her house: but the foolish plucketh it down with her hands.

Dear wife, there is a lot of power and accompanying responsibilities that lie with you.

Your decisions, prayers, and actions will eventually build your home or tear it down, therefore, you cannot afford to be foolish.

Be wise and cooperate with what God is trying to do in your life.

How do you do this? 

Avoid all the strife, bickering, quarrels, and the like for that is how a foolish woman tears down her home. Cooperate with your husband and be submissive as the Bible says.

Now, to the husbands.
What Husbands and Wives Are To Build. Since it is the woman building the house, what then is the responsibility of the man?

Build the woman! The husband is to build the builder!

That is what the husband should do. Build the woman.

Dear men, build your wife so that your wife can build the house.

Invest in your wife. Support her endeavors and career.

Be interested in her passion and you know what, she will give it all it takes to pray for the family.

May your marriage be blessed. These are What Husbands and Wives Are To Build 

CONFESSION FOR THE DAY
I am a wise builder.

PRAYER FOR THE DAY
Lord, give me the wisdom to build.

THOUGHT FOR THE DAY
Jas 1:5 (KJV) If any of you lack wisdom, let him ask of God, that giveth to all men liberally, and upbraideth not; and it shall be given him.

ACTION PLAN FOR THE DAY
Ask God for wisdom

BIBLE READING FOR THE DAY 
Genesis 24

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The Art Of Listening In Marriage

The Art Of Listening In Marriage

Reading Time: 3 minutes

The Art Of Listening In Marriage. Women are known to speak more words than men. In fact, studies have shown they speak 10,000 more words than men.

Even the introvertish woman is speaking maybe not out loud but she is talking in her mind. Every woman loves talking because to them it is therapeutic.

When a woman is stressed she likes to talk. To her, talking is for affection and for connection. Unlike men who talk for information.

When women talk about an issue or a problem, they are not talking because of the solution, or to be judged, criticized, or corrected. They talk because they want to feel connected to their spouse, they want companionship and affection. They usually feel better after they have talked.

However, men need to be careful not to muzzle their wives, especially the introverted ones.

When men understand how women see talking, it will help them in having meaningful conversations with them and not kill the conversation with their wives.

It’s not out of place for women to remember things that happened in the past. It’s not because they are revengeful that they bring up issues of the past, it’s because they have a larger capacity to store information.

Whenever they bring up such issues, don’t criticize or judge them, just reassure them and apologize. It’s okay to apologize for issues of the past. 

These are four ways couples should best handle conversations.

1. Don’t Debate
Men, don’t fall to the temptation of debating with your wives when they talk to or with you. Men are hunters and territorial beings. They are warriors and fighters. They enjoy conquest and whatever they do, they do for honor. Men, your wives are not competing with you. It’s just conversational. Be careful of how you use your words. Don’t Debate with her. In the same way, wives should not argue rudely with their husbands.

2. Don’t Dismiss 
Don’t Dismiss her during her conversations. Don’t dismiss what is a reality to her as not being important. Don’t Dismiss her feelings. Don’t trivialize what is serious to her. Empathize with her or just listen to her giving your full attention. Wives, don’t even try to dismiss your husbands. It may not land well with him.

3. Don’t Disagree
Two wrongs never make a right. Since both husband and wife are very different with over fifty differences, you will always have different opinions. Submission is not shutting up her uniqueness and individuality but with her different opinion allowing her husband’s opinion take the lead. Husbands, never kill your wife’s initiatives. You may be killing the conversation in her unknowingly. We can disagree to agree especially knowing that we are better as two different persons. We have two different perspectives to bring to the table for more wins. You must both understand The Art Of Listening In Marriage.

4. Don’t Defend
Sometimes when your wife brings up an issue that she feels hurt about all she needs and all she is hoping to get from you is a simple “I am sorry”. I am sorry does not diminish your leadership role but validates it. If your wife says she’s hurt then that means she is hurt. Don’t defend your actions, don’t sermonize her. Be concerned more about her person and wellbeing than you are about fixing her or putting her in her right place. The same goes for husbands, learn to empathize with your husband because he is really hurt if he can say he is.

Wives usually need reassurance while men need affirmation.

The health of the marriage is more important than any other thing.

Our marriage will thrive. This is The Art Of Listening In Marriage.

CONFESSION FOR THE DAY
I honor the marriage covenant. I respect my marriage. I appreciate our differences and I adjust to making marriage work

PRAYERS FOR THE DAY
Father give me your wisdom to honor my spouse in Jesus name 

THOUGHT FOR THE DAY
So every married man should be gracious to his wife just as he is gracious to himself. And every wife should be tenderly devoted to her husband. Ephesians 5:33 TPT 

ACTION PLAN FOR THE DAY 
Begin to listen to your wife

BIBLE READING FOR THE DAY
Eph 5

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The Commitment Of Marriage

The Commitment Of Marriage

Reading Time: 3 minutes

The Commitment Of Marriage. God is our creator, He made us and we are the sheep of His pasture. He also created the marriage institution and knows how best it is to be worked. He didn’t just leave us clueless but gave us His guidelines.

The Bible is our manufacturer’s manual. It becomes our road map to doing marriage well. God has promised the days of heaven on earth in our marriages. We can only achieve this when we live according to the dictates of the Bible.

Any diversion from the commands of God’s injunctions leads to a negative experience. God may lead us around but He definitely will not lead us wrong. 

There are instructions for living individually because it is two whole individuals that make a good marriage.

We are to study the Word of God for living. The Word is to transform us. 

Let’s look at one of the core instructions to married couples in Ephesians. It speaks specifically to husbands and wives. This is The Commitment Of Marriage

Husbands and wives are to pursue these instructions with the whole of their hearts. They are to study it in different translations of the Bible and ask the Holy Spirit for Grace to do it no matter what. 

That is how to follow God. The rewards are for the Word practitioners. Talk is cheap, quoting the scriptures is cheap but being a doer of the Word is where the real work is.

Ephesians 5:21-33 TPT
And out of your reverence for Christ be supportive of each other in love.

For wives, this means being devoted to your husbands like you are tenderly devoted to our Lord, for the husband provides leadership for the wife, just as Christ provides leadership for his church, as the Savior and Reviver of the body. 

In the same way, the church is devoted to Christ, let the wives be devoted to their husbands in everything. 

And to the husbands, you are to demonstrate love for your wives with the same tender devotion that Christ demonstrated to us, his bride. For he died for us, sacrificing himself to make us holy and pure, cleansing us through the showering of the pure water of the Word of God. All that He does in us is designed to make us a mature church for his pleasure, until we become a source of praise to him—glorious and radiant, beautiful and holy, without fault or flaw.

Husbands, have the obligation of loving and caring for their wives the same way they love and care for their own bodies, for to love your wife is to love your own self. 

No one abuses his own body but pampers it—serving and satisfying its needs. 

That’s exactly what Christ does for his church! He serves and satisfies us as members of his body. 

For this reason, a man is to leave his father and his mother and lovingly hold to his wife, since the two have become joined as one flesh. 

Marriage is the beautiful design of the Almighty, a great mystery of Christ and his church. 

So every married man should be gracious to his wife just as he is gracious to himself. 

And every wife should be tenderly devoted to her husband. This is The Commitment Of Marriage.

This remains the core of the marriage relationship. Couples having issues in their marriage should come to a point where the Word becomes the final authority they both submit to.

Each couple should embark on a personal journey of doing everything possible to unravel this instruction. Study, meditate and confess this scripture.

Any teaching that is outside these instructions is not the Word. 

Let me leave us all to study this scripture. May the Lord grant us understanding

Our marriage will thrive

CONFESSION FOR THE DAY
I live by the word. I honor the Word. I humble myself under the mighty hand of the Word. As I obey the Word, my life and marriage is transformed.

PRAYERS FOR THE DAY
Father give me your wisdom to honor my spouse in Jesus name 

THOUGHT FOR THE DAY
So every married man should be gracious to his wife just as he is gracious to himself. And every wife should be tenderly devoted to her husband. Ephesians 5:33 TPT 

ACTION PLAN FOR THE DAY 
Study this scripture until you have understanding and revelation on it.

BIBLE READING FOR THE DAY
Eph 5

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The Five Magic Words For Couples

The Five Magic Words For Couples

Reading Time: 2 minutes

The Five Magic Words For Couples. If you attended a good nursery and primary school, you will probably have learnt that there are five magic words

When growing up, it must have been the training passed down to you by your parents. The use of these magic words is the normal etiquette of any relationship

As couples, these five magic words should not be far from our lips. We should be courteous to each other.

The Five Magic Words For Couples

1. Thank you
The first magic word is thank you. As couples, we should be quick to thank our spouses. For little things and big things. You may not know the sacrifices they are going through. Being married to you is a lot of sacrifice, that we should thank our spouse for.

Take nothing for granted.

2. Please
This shows courtesy and respect for the person you are talking to. Please close the door, please make rice for me, please take the bin out etc. Don’t talk to your spouse as if they were your servant.

3. Sorry
Apology can never be wrong. Some spouse feel too big to say sorry. You should learn to say sorry. Humble yourself and tell your spouse “I am sorry”. Let your sorry be from a genuine heart

4. Excuse me
Another word that shows you respect your spouse

5. Pardon me
You cannot just bump on your spouse all in the name of superiority complex. 

These are The Five Magic Words For Couples. All these magic words should be used by couples when interacting with each other

Your marriage will thrive.

CONFESSION FOR THE DAY
I am courteous when talking to my spouse. My words are gracious seasoned with salt

PRAYERS FOR THE DAY
Father give me your wisdom to honor my spouse in Jesus name 

THOUGHT FOR THE DAY
Reckless words are like the thrusts of a sword, cutting remarks meant to stab and to hurt. But the words of the wise soothe and heal. Proverbs 12:18 TPT 

ACTION PLAN FOR THE DAY 
Make the five magic words a part of your words

BIBLE READING FOR THE DAY
Pro 18

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Two Ways Couples Hurt Each Other

Two Ways Couples Hurt Each Other

Reading Time: 3 minutes

Two Ways Couples Hurt Each Other. I want to start today’s devotional by quoting verses from the Bible. If you are a believer, then you will recognize the Bible as the highest authority on earth and heaven. We live by its instructions and heed its advice.

1. Your Words

As couples, we need to place close attention to our choice of words, speech, and tone. Couples should not just say anything they feel like saying without considering its effect on their spouses. God the covenant witness between the two of you is watching.

Lovers of God think before they speak, but the careless blurt out wicked words meant to cause harm. Proverbs 15:28 TPT 

Reckless words are like the thrusts of a sword, cutting remarks meant to stab and to hurt. But the words of the wise soothe and heal.  Proverbs 12:18 TPT 

Your words are so powerful that they will kill or give life, and the talkative person will reap the consequences. Proverbs 18:21 TPT 

You must stop speaking evil, hurtful words and never deceive in what they say. Always turn from what is wrong and cultivate what is good; eagerly pursue peace in every relationship, making it your prize. 1 Peter 3:11 TPT

The Bible tells us to stop speaking evil and hurtful words. You can stop it. Even if you are a hot, inconsiderate temperament. You have a new life in Christ.

We are to pursue peace in every relationship especially that with our spouse.

If your speech causes a bridge in the marital covenant, then you are allowing the devil to use your speech to accomplish his purpose which is to steal, kill and destroy. May that not be your portion in Jesus’ name.

Let your words rather soothe and heal your spouse.

Not thinking before you speak or weighing your words or reckless words do more harm than good.

Two Ways Couples Hurt Each Other.

2. Your Actions 

Usually, the hurtful words are as a result of hurtful actions. The hurtful words emanate from a completely frustrated spouse. Your spouse is distracted, causing you harm, your BP goes up and you can literally see yourself dying. In your desperation, you blurt out words in other to get the attention of your spouse who seems oblivious to your actions! Hurtful words will do harm. Hurtful actions will do harm as well!

Infidelity issues, emotional adultery, lack of communication, insincerity or lying, drinking, smoking and many more are some of the hurtful actions that couples can get into.

I think once your spouse says this habit is killing me, raising my BP, and so on, if you truly love that man or woman, then you will work on your weaknesses and not feed them! It is one thing to be tempted by the devil, it is another thing for you to be tempting the devil. Don’t pursue your lusts! Don’t set yourself up! Don’t follow lustful desires like you are uncontrollable! Ask God to create a new heart in you!

Psa 51:10 (KJV) Create in me a clean heart, O God; and renew a right spirit within me.

Marriage is work!

Back to hurtful actions and words, the simple way to deal with this is to be friends, focus on each other, respect your issues and please yourselves after pleasing God.  Communicate well, be open and be sincere. You will see that those issues will be resolved. Alternatively, seek a mentor and talk! Some couples actually need a therapist!

Most people who lie impulsively, live in denial and have depression waves one after the other may be dealing with bipolar issues and some other mental issues which will require an expert in that field.

Your marriage will thrive. These are Two Ways Couples Hurt Each Other.

CONFESSION FOR THE DAY
My marriage will work. I will stop killing my marriage and spouse with my words. I am not Satan’s agent doing his bidding in my marriage

PRAYERS FOR THE DAY
Father give me your wisdom and strenght to always yield my tongue to the Holy Spirit in Jesus name 

THOUGHT FOR THE DAY
Reckless words are like the thrusts of a sword, cutting remarks meant to stab and to hurt. But the words of the wise soothe and heal. Proverbs 12:18 TPT 

ACTION PLAN FOR THE DAY 
I will stop using hurtful words like swords on my spouse but I will use my words to build him/her up

BIBLE READING FOR THE DAY
Pro 12

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