Tunrayo borrowed Lola’s Geography notebook from school to copy the new lesson into her own notebook. She flung the notebook into her bag and pushed the bag aside to the wall. When it was time to leave for home, Tunrayo stuffed her books and pen into her bag, crushing all the items in it, before zipping it right. The next day at day, when she returned Lola’s book, it was not like it was before. The edges were bent, there was oil stains and water marks all over it. (Does this portray “love your neighbour”?)
‘Tunrayo, what happened to my book?’ a shocked Lola asked.
You see, Tunrayo didn’t know that she was destroying Lola’s book with the way she was handling it. And she returned it not the way she borrowed it from Lola.
Let’s see what God has to say about this in the bible, in line with love your neighbour as yourself.
“A man might borrow an animal from his neighbor. It might get hurt or die while the owner is not there. Then the one who borrowed it must pay the owner for the animal. Exodus 22:14 ICB
Well, in this case, it’s a notebook that was borrowed. Yes, Fikayo gave it back but it wasn’t the way she had borrowed it.
The thing is, would you like to receive your belongings back in a rough, torn or dirty way? If no, then why would you want to do that to someone?
Remember, loving your neighbor is a sign of how much you love yourself and how well you want to be treated. If you want to be treated well by others, treat other people well too. If you love yourself well, you will love others too; you will love your neighbour as yourself.
What should Fikayo had done with Lola’s notebook? She should have handled it with care and ensured she returned it as she had received it. Even better than she had. That would have made Lola happy and ensured that she lend more of her books to Fikayo. But with what Fikayo did with the book, Lola might likely never borrow her anything ever again.
May you receive the grace to be a good neighbour. Amen.
Prayer: Lord, make me a good neighbour. Help me to love your neighbour in Jesus’ name, amen.
Prayer point: What have you borrowed from people? Did you return them in a good condition? Or a bad one?
Yesterday, we started on the topic what a wife wants from her husband, and we listed four points that men ought to take note of.
We said a woman wants 1. A head, not a headache 2. A protector, not a manipulator 3. A caring husband, not a scary one, and 4. A praying husband, not a preying one.
Today, I will tell you two more things every wife wants from her husband.
5. A gardener, not a scavenger Every woman is like a garden of treasures. When a gardener is through working on a garden, there is order. When a scavenger is through, there is disorder. A gardener nurtures, a scavenger ruptures! A gardener prepares the garden for productivity; a scavenger is looking for what’s in it for him. It is a whole world of difference! A scavenger wants to raid your garden and if as a single you are involved with one, it’s time you send him parking and close your gate!
6. A romantic husband, not a sarcastic one Women love it when their husbands are romantic. All the things a man used to do and say while he is wooing them, they want it to continue. If the man is wise, he will oblige to that. Ladies don’t like abusive men, men who use them as joke objects all the time, identifying and poking at their weaknesses rather than emphasize their strengths! It is not a good idea when you are inspired to crack some dry jokes directed at your wife each time you see her!
You will lose her gradually doing that! Rather, learn her love language and speak that language! If what it will take for you to have a good home is to help her a little in the kitchen, then do it!
As a young couple, I would bathe our boys from when they were just four days old! My wife loved that, so I took it upon myself to do that for all the boys till they were old enough to take care of themselves. Those were the early years when I had not started writing devotionals and I had time in the mornings.
Now, that may not resonate with you, and your wife might not even want to trust you with a four-day-old baby, but find something you can do to make her happy! That is how to be a man!
May God bless our marriage.
CONFESSION FOR THE DAY I receive the wisdom of God to advance my marriage
PRAYERS FOR THE DAY Father, help me to be a husband indeed.
THOUGHT FOR THE DAY The heart of her husband doth safely trust in her, so that he shall have no need of spoil. She will do him good and not evil all the days of her life (Proverbs 31:11-12 KJV)
ACTION PLAN FOR THE DAY Support your spouse all the way.
Whoso findeth a wife findeth a good thing, and obtaineth favour of the Lord. (Proverbs 18:22 KJV)
It is interesting to note that the scripture above says, He that findeth a wife, not a sister, not a girl, but a wife! In other words, you must be a wife material before being found.
You see, the scripture cannot be broken. It is the wife material that would be found, not any other thing! So the next question is how does one become a wife material?
First of all, we will attempt to answer that question by looking at what a wife material is not. Sometimes, you find out what something is by studying what it is not.
You are not a wife material when
1. You are lazy When you read through who a virtuous woman is in the scriptures, you will know that laziness is not part of the virtue being described there. If you have doubts, go through Proverbs 31: 10 – 31. Listen to me, if you are lazy, you need to start working on that now, so that it will not affect your marriage eventually after marriage.
A good wife should Know how to cook. A good wife is a homemaker. Women are usually multipliers. Start to discipline yourself and learn the basic things.
It is not exactly like a wife should become the house help, and I am not advocating that the husband should do nothing at home. It’s so simple, a wife should not be lazy. How do you know you are lazy? Somebody would have told you! If your mum or dad has ever told you that you are lazy, it is true! Don’t argue, just say mum, how can I make adjustments? Be humble! Don’t wait for your husband to confirm that!
2. You are sleeping around You are not a wife material when you are still sleeping around and you are generous with your body! It is a direct violation of God’s way of doing things and such a lifestyle will bring difficulties into your life. The way of the transgressor is hard! A wife material is not into “aristo!”
3. You are spiritually irresponsible A wife material should develop herself spiritually. You need that spiritual maturity to help you balance your role as a wife-to-be, mother-to-be, and sometimes combining that with a vibrant career.
4. You are not accountable Accountability is powerful. As a young lady, who are your mentors? Who are you accountable to? Who can you call on the phone when you have issues and you will get good counsel? Are you a tither? Do you honor God with your time and service? Are you serving in your local assembly?
5. You are selfish A wife material is selfless. You don’t consider yourself alone! Marriage is about being selfless. Two people who are married and are selfish will soon crash their marriage. Marriage can only survive when the two people involved love themselves genuinely and are not selfish
6. You are already living with him You are not a wife material by living in his house when you are not yet married. One of the marks of being a wife material is to respect your body and honor God with it. But when you are already involved in compromise repeatedly and without repentance, you are not really honoring your body!
Don’t travel over to meet him where he is and then spend days with him. If you do that, you will be sowing the wrong seeds into that relationship and you are not going to have God’s support and favor doing that.
What if you are already doing that? Park out of his house! You are not married!
What if I park out and he leaves me? Then he is not your husband!
Your husband will be willing to wait for you. That is how you carve some respect for yourself.
When you look at the concept of a “wife” in the scriptures, it says, you are a help meet for him. Your entrance into his life translates into favour for the family!
Are you preparing yourself in that regard? You see God is not an author of confusion, so He will not bring into your life what you are not ready for! Are you really ready for marriage? Do you love yourself? Are you really single in the sense of it? Have you gone past that stage where you are looking for someone to complete you?
It is a wife material that would be found. Not any other thing, so my challenge to ladies this morning is, are you a wife material?
I pray for you this morning, that God will open your eyes the more and help you to be better prepared, and to be found by your husband! You will be found in Jesus name! I curse every operation of the spirit of delay in your life and declare that God’s counsel over your life will stand in Jesus name!
CONFESSION FOR THE DAY I receive the wisdom of God to prepare for my marriage
PRAYERS FOR THE DAY Pray for wisdom to be all God wants you to be.
THOUGHT FOR THE DAY Prov 18:22 (NET) The one who finds a wife finds what is enjoyable, and receives a pleasurable gift from the Lord.
Yesterday, we lookedat what every man wants in his spouse that women need to pay attention to. Today, it’s the other way round, we’re looking at what a wife wants from her husband, so let’s go!
1. A head, not a headache This is one of the vital things a wife wants from you. A man is supposed to be his wife’s head, not her headache. What is the head supposed to do? The eyes are located in the head, so one of the principal responsibilities of a man as the head is to cast a vision for the family and give direction as well. The mind is located in the head, so the man is supposed to be a thinker and be responsible.
Being the head does not mean she is subservient to you, for there is nothing the head can do alone. It is the body that holds the head and so the head needs the cooperation of the neck and the body to function in its assignment.
The husband provides leadership to his wife the way Christ does to his church, not by domineering but by cherishing. (Ephesians 5:23 Message)
There are some singles ladies in courtship that are already having sleepless nights by virtue of who they are involved with. This is not the plan of God for you, and when you see negative trends like that, the man is not likely to change after marriage. Don’t close your eyes to all the red lights because you want to get married desperately.
2. A protector, not a manipulator A man is supposed to be the protector of the lady, even in a dating situation. But what is rampant today is a brazen display of manipulation and high degree insincerity. We have men today who are not really interested in marriage but just in jeru trip. A wife wants to feel safe and protected
As a lady, there is no point courting such a man because if you are not careful, he will soon have his way while you are left heartbroken. A manipulator knows how to feed your weaknesses just to get what he wants. A husband that manipulates knows how to logically blame the wife for everything.
3. A caring husband, not a scary one There are wives that can’t talk in their matrimonial home. They are permanently muted. For such women, the fear of their husbands is the beginning of wisdom! There are even ladies who are in courtship and they have no say. Now, this is very defective and it is not God’s order! The man that loves God and loves his family does not scare. You don’t rule your home with an iron fist, you rule with love.
A situation where the boy is playing football, but upon hearing the blast of dad’s car horn, dives through the window, the wife rushes to the kitchen to get food ready…. all because the lion of the tribe of his house has come! Children raised in this kind of atmosphere always rebel in the end. Be caring, rather than be scary!
4. A praying husband, not a preying one It will interest you to know that every lady wants a spiritual man. Every lady wants a man that will wake her up to pray. Every lady wants a man that can lay hands on her and bless her. Now, you don’t have to be a pastor to do that. You only need to have a relationship with God.
Tomorrow, I will show us more things a woman wants from her husband.
May God bless our marriage.
CONFESSION FOR THE DAY I receive the wisdom of God to advance my marriage
PRAYERS FOR THE DAY Father, help me to be a husband indeed.
THOUGHT FOR THE DAY The heart of her husband doth safely trust in her, so that he shall have no need of spoil. She will do him good and not evil all the days of her life (Proverbs 31:11-12 KJV)
ACTION PLAN FOR THE DAY Support your spouse all the way.
Today we will be learning how to love your neighbour as yourself from the story of Tom.
Tom glanced outside of the window, away from his video game, and noticed the dark clouds signaling rain any moment now. He returned to his game till it began to rain. It rained for hours. Remember the story is about ‘love your neighbour as yourself.’
Later that day, Fikayo, Tom’s roommate returned from class and found his clothes drenched on the line. He knew Tom had seen him this morning when he was washing. Why hadn’t Tom helped him to pack his clothes off the line before it rained? Did Tom not learn “love your neighbour as yourself”?
“Tom, why didn’t you help me to pack my clothes when it began to rain?’ asked Fikayo. ‘I don’t know.’ Tom replied.
Fikayo shook his head sadly and left Tom to his video game. “You must learn to love your neighbour as yourself,” he thought as he left.
In the bible, God laid down some instructions to the Israelites concerning this “love your neighbour as yourself” matter.
You might see your fellow Israelite’s ox or sheep wandering away. Don’t ignore it. Take it back to its owner. The owner might not live close to you. Or you might not know who he is. Then take the animal home with you. Keep it until the owner comes looking for it. Then give it back to him. Deuteronomy 22:1 – 2 ICB
He says that it is a sin if you act nonchalantly towards your neighbor’s belongings. Not that you should be on the lookout for their things. No. What it means is that, when you are in a position to help keep their things safe, you should do so. Love your neighbour as yourself.
Just like Tom in our story. He knew it was going to rain and he didn’t help his roommate – his neighbor, to pack his clothes in. Even if Fikayo was not his roommate, but because he saw him washing and Tom was around when it began to rain. He should have portrayed “love your neighbour as yourself.”
All he could have done was to take some minutes to demonstrate how much he loves his neighbor by helping to pack his clothes from the line. Learn to love your neighbour as yourself.
God isn’t saying that you should love your neighbour as yourself because they are good, but because He wants you to grow to a point where you can love people irrespective of who they are or what they do to you.
May God bless you and give you a heart of love for people. Amen
Prayer: Lord, help me to act responsibly towards people’s things around me, in Jesus’ name, amen.
Action point: Be watchful of people’s thing’s around you; love your neighbour as yourself
Fathers and Fatherhood was taught by Rev. Dunamis Okunowo on the 20th of June 2021 at Shouts of Grace Center, Joke Plaza, Beside Trans Amusement Park, Bodija-UI Road, Ibadan.
In his teaching, Rev. Dunamis made mention of the following important points:
The rising of children lie in their fathers
You are designed to tap into the grace and strength of your father so that you can go farther.
A simple offence at your covering can cost you your life.
There ought to be a mutual embrace between the father and the son.
A Father Warns
I do not write these things to shame you, but as my beloved children I warn you.
1 Corinthians 4:14 (NKJV)
He reprimands you. He disciplines you. He’s not some cheerleader who pampers you.
It’s not everything you obey that you understand, but once you obey, you position yourself for favour.
Anybody that cannot be disciplined is a bastard.
If you endure chastening, God deals with you as with sons; for what son is there whom a father does not chasten? But if you are without chastening, of which all have become partakers, then you are illegitimate and not sons.
Hebrews 12:7-8 (NKJV)
When you are being corrected, your ego is bruised, but you must heed instruction.
Correction is bitter but the end result is sweet.
A Father Exhibits Humility
It is the responsibility of a father to provide for his children.
A Father Protects
If you are not covered, you will struggle all your life. You don’t fight your pastor; you don’t fight your father.
You have a covering of protection under the person you are submitted to.
A Father Preserves
Your father has authority in his voice.
A Father Provides Priesthood
A father (biological) has the responsibility to take the needs of the family to God. The devil can’t afflict your household unless you permit.
A Father Is A Prophet
The father is a prophetic personality.
It takes your prophet to show you where your prosperity is.
As a son, you must understand when there is a shift in your father’s life, and when you see it you will get double of the anointing over his life.
To listen to messages of Rev Dunamis, go HERE or HERE
1. A wife, not a knife There is a difference between a wife and a knife. A knife cuts and lacerates. Such is Job’s wife who looked at him in the height of his crisis and pain and told him to curse God and die!
A wife does not give up. A good wife stays there and believes the best for her husband and home.
The heart of her husband doth safely trust in her, so that he shall have no need of spoil. She will do him good and not evil all the days of her life (Proverbs 31:11-12 KJV)
2. A companion, not a competitor A man wants a companion in his wife. There is a difference between championship and companionship. A home is not a WWE arena. No man will feel good who thinks his wife is out to compete with him.
Competitive spirit between a couple defeats the very reason for marriage.
3. A help; not a hell You tell some men to repent of their sins or else they will go to hell. They simply laugh and tell you there is no hell hotter than the ones their wives are giving them at home. Sounds humorous, but is actually sad to hear.
Every man needs genuine help. He may not own up to it if he is overly egocentric, but the truth remains he needs help.
A woman was created to help the man. But when she decides to give him hell at home, all will not be well.
Sometimes, it is the man that pushes the woman to this point, but it is not always a good place to be in.
A joke was told of the devil invading a particular club and everybody ran away including the club owner except one man.
The devil was surprised. So he asked him,
“Are you not scared? Everybody is running from me and you are just sitting there?” The man sips his drink and calmly replied, “I am not scared of you. What can you do? I have been married to your sister for seven years, what else can you do that she has not done?
4. A friend, not a fraud Every man needs a friend. A friend is always there for you. A friend loves genuinely. Friends talk and communicate. Friends cover each other’s back. Friends want to be around each other. Friends look forward to being together.
There is no point getting married to somebody whose guts you hate.
Are you still your husband’s friend? If not, do all you can to become friends again.
If there is a courtship or marriage where the couple is no longer friends, crisis is in the corner.
5. A playmate, not a co-tenant Every man loves to play. There is a recreational tendency in every man. If he doesn’t see it in his wife, he would hang around the boys in town!
Ever wondered why your husband would leave a large LCD, curved Samsung TV at home to go and watch football in a club on a smaller TV? It is the ‘play” in the watching, the comments, the laughter, the conversations that ensues while the game is going on.
It is not wise to get so busy and leave him all alone to watch his football. Get interested; learn the names…and you will be amazed!
CONFESSION FOR THE DAY I receive the wisdom of God to advance my marriage
PRAYERS FOR THE DAY Father, help me to be a wife indeed.
THOUGHT FOR THE DAY The heart of her husband doth safely trust in her, so that he shall have no need of spoil. She will do him good and not evil all the days of her life (Proverbs 31:11-12 KJV)
ACTION PLAN FOR THE DAY Support your spouse all the way.
Who is your neighbor? Is it the familynext to your family? The families on your street? Your friend? Your classmate? Your church friend? Who exactly is your neighbor? Why should you love your neighbor?
Let’s see what Jesus did about neighbours in the bible.
And the second command is like the first: ‘Love your neighbor as you love yourself.’ Matthew 22:39 ICB
Jesus was talking about what loving someone else like you love yourself. Now ask yourself this question – “how much do I love myself?”
Thinking like this will help you take notice of how good or bad you have been treating yourself. If you are good to yourself, you will most likely treat others well and if you’re not, well, you will treat them badly.
Look at the way you think of yourself. Do you have healthy self-esteem and not self-pride. If your esteem is high, you will likely esteem others well too.
What words do you use on yourself? Are they negative words that you use to keep telling you how bad you are?
The verse above talks about how you are supposed to love someone – as yourself. And your neighbor is the nearest person to you. Not people who live beside you in the same compound or on the street. Your neighbor is whoever is close to you at any place you are.
On the bus, on the road, in class – anywhere you find yourself together with someone.
Yes, your neighbour lives beside you in the same compound or on the same street, but Jesus’ teaching wants you to see your neighbour beyond that. He wants you to see anybody you meet anywhere as your neighbour and treat them kindly just like He treats you kindly.
For instance, if you are sitting beside a young person like yourself on a bus and the person’s item falls down unnoticed by them, you should help to pick and give it to them. That’s the kind of love Jesus was talking about. Not that you ignore and look the other way.
For this series we will be looking at ways you can love your neighbour as yourself. May Jesus hi you a heart of love. Amen.
Prayer: Lord, teach me how to show much love to my neighbor In Jesus’name, amen.
Action plan: Buckle up as we learn more on this topic.
Here is the concluding part of yesterday’s devotional.
We are taking masturbation as an example.
Please, note that your weakness or lust don’t have to be sexual alone, it could be gluttony, for example.
7. You have identified it as wrong, sinful and a serious weakness.
8. The next thing to do is to seek help through counsel and prayers.
Find your pastor or mentor who you can confide in and talk to that person. Let him or her counsel you and pray with you.
The moment you have taken this step, you have also become accountable in a sense. You know that there is somebody who knows what you are dealing with and who you can call anytime for quick advice. You also give that person the right and permission to check on you regularly.
9. The next thing is to spiritually guard yourself. Every weakness and lust takes place in the heart first.
Now you need to build a fence around your heart with God’s word, not once a week, but every day without fail. The moment you stop reading, studying and meditating on God’s word, you become vulnerable. This is probably the most crucial step to take in all.
Read God’s word daily without fail! This is what this ministry tries to help believers do through KHC devotionals.
Keep thy heart with all diligence; for out of it are the issues of life. (Proverbs 4:23 KJV)
10. The next thing is to destroy every trigger. There are things that aid this particular lust. That could be a friend that sends you links, some movies you have on your drives, some pornographic materials you keep and so on.
You take a practical step and destroy every trigger. You may have to disconnect from some people. Every Delilahs, Jezebels, Amnons have to go! There are people you know that once you visit them or they visit you, it will always end in feeding your weakness and land you in a sexual sin. Disconnect from such people. That is how to preserve your destiny!
Everything appearance of them, you run the other way. That is what you have to practically do on your part.
11. Learn the power of exposure. Iniquity is perpetuated in the atmosphere of secrecy. The moment you know you are about to give in to this particular lust, which is usually behind your doors, open your door, walk out and change your environment for a moment. It helps a lot that way.
That is why the Bible says ‘Flee Fornication,’ and not ‘Let’s reason together!’ Pray in the Spirit as you flee and supply some strength to your inner man. That is how to put your body under and mortify the deeds of the flesh.
12. Lastly, the scripture says walk in the Spirit and you will not fulfill the lust of the flesh. To walk in the Spirit means to be in step with the Holy Spirit. Ask Him everything you want to do before you do them. It is a good lifestyle that will cleanse you of all immoralities.
For example, you have made up your mind to ask Him about everything. You feel like masturbating. How do you ask, “Dear Holy Spirit, can I …..”
As those thoughts of compromising come, He raises a standard within you to crush them because you are in step with Him. That is a thought that is trying to exalt itself itself against the knowledge of God, you cast it down by the help of the Holy Spirit.
He will not lead you into a guy’s house who has intentions of forcefully sleeping with you. He will tell you, ‘Don’t go there!’ You catch the drift? He cleanses your thoughts and your words when you relate with Him on that level and gives you strength to overcome every temptation.
I pray that God will give you more strength in your inner man to confront every lust in Jesus name!
What more ways do you think can be employed to deal with weaknesses? Let me hear you in the comment section.
CONFESSION FOR THE DAY I will fulfil purpose in Jesus name
PRAYERS FOR THE DAY As I explore more ways to deal with my weaknesses, Lord, help me.
THOUGHT FOR THE DAY Keep thy heart with all diligence; for out of it are the issues of life. (Proverbs 4:23 KJV)
ACTION PLAN FOR THE DAY List more ways you can confront those weaknesses.
Good students attend class regularly, pay attention during class, ask questions when they don’t understand, study after school, and repeat the process over and over till they achieve excellent grades.
Jesus has called you to be a good student of the word of God. He expects you to read and study the bible well over and over till you become excellent at it.
The bible can help you understand so many things about God, Jesus, the Holy Spirit, Heaven, life, emotions, thoughts, actions, people, and so much more.
The bible gives you practical ways to understand your walk with Christ. It teaches you how to do so with many examples starting from the old testament to the new testament.
“Your word is like a lamp for my feet and a light for my way.” Psalm 119:105 ICB
“All scripture is inspired by God, and is useful for teaching and for showing people what is wrong in their lives. It is useful for correcting faults and teaching how to live right. Using the scriptures, the person who serves God will be ready and will have everything he needs to do every good work” 2 Timothy 3:16-17. ICB
Everything you need for your walk with Christ can be found in God’s word. Jesus wants you to use all of it to become a strong, sensible, and informed Christian. One who can understand what is not good and how to deal with bad thoughts and stay away from bad friends.
I pray that the Lord will help you to read and study the word. Amen.
Prayer: Lord, Jesus, I want to be a student of the word. Teach me as I read and study Your word. In Your mighty name I pray, amen.
Action plan: Pick your bible, a writing pad and a pen and start to study the word.
Marriage is often time associated with wine, because our union with our spouse is supposed to bring joy to us.
The marriage ceremony itself is a joyous occasion with the bride and groom looking their best. Everyone is happy, lots of food to eat and drinks, music, dancing and the exuberance of finding the love of your life.
All these sum up to give joy and excitement. Both for the new couples, the parents, families, the couples’ friends and all.
But a few years down the lane we see that joy almost vanished from the face of the once over joyed couple. Why is this?
We may have differentreason why, but I want to point to us that the devil is the real culprit here.
The thief comes only in order to steal and kill and destroy. I came that they may have and enjoy life, and have it in abundance (to the full, till it overflows). John 10:10 AMPC
The above scripture identifies the devil as a thief who come to steal if not stopped, graduates to kill and then finally to destroy. Bringing to total ruins, both what you desire and what you have laboured for. He destroys legacy of families and what they stand for.
The devil is the one that steals joy from marriages. He does this through several means and does it in whose ever marriage he is allowed to perform his three-fold agenda and mission.
Every believers’ marriage is precious and priceless. The devil hates anything joyous, good and glorious. He is attracted to it, to steal from it, kill and destroy it.
The devil is not just a nuisance, he is an enemy. That is the fact and the truth. You must always take the offensive against his onslaught.
The scripture in John 10:10 didn’t just say that the devil cometh to steal, kill and destroy. It concluded that ‘I am come that they might have or enjoy life and it more abundantly.
For every of the attempt of the devil to steal the joy of and in your marriage whether by misunderstanding, strife, unforgiveness, infidelity, sin of different types, anger, works of the flesh et cetera, Jesus also came.
He came once and for all to deal with the three-fold agenda of devil. Jesus is not only the answer to the problem, He is much more than that.
It is not your wife or your husband that is hurting you or cheating on you. Am I saying we should not take responsibility for our actions? No, I didn’t say that.
We take responsibility and deal with the root cause of the issue. The devil hides under the works of the flesh or sin to carry out his three-fold agenda.
Begin to insist on your joy, peace in marriage, prosperity and every good thing Jesus already paid for there.
Therefore with joy will you draw water from the wells of salvation. Isaiah 12:3 AMPC
Joy in your marriage is not just having a good behaviour. You need your joy to draw from the well of salvation. No wonder the devil is after your joy.
Without joy, you cannot draw. You can speak in tongues, fast and pray but you also need joy. When devil throws different issues at you, he is after your joy. Insist on your joy. Respond in joy to any attack on your marriage. It is an overflowing joy, the joy that is full of glory.
Laugh at the face of lack. You begin to draw wealth and prosperity from the well of salvation.
Let nothing steal your joy. Be joyful with the wife of your youth.
May God grant us more understanding.
God bless our marriage in Jesus name.
CONFESSION FOR THE DAY Nothing will steal my joy. I have joy in the Holy Ghost
PRAYERS FOR THE DAY Lord, I ask for grace to reach my destiny in Jesus name.
THOUGHT FOR THE DAY James 4:12 MSG God is in charge of deciding human destiny. Who do you think you are to meddle in the destiny of others?
ACTION PLAN FOR THE DAY Have a hearty discussion with your spouse today
1. The first thing I want to mention is that everybody knows what his weakness or weaknesses are. You know yours; I know mine.
2. Once you know, it is good for you to acknowledge and accept that there is a weakness.
A lot of people live in denial, never accepting or owning up to what is obvious. It is self-deception, nothing more. Such people can argue with you till tomorrow on what is already too obvious.
3. After you accept that there is a weakness or a particular lust; then you are opened to help.
This is important because you cannot help a man who thinks he doesn’t need help. It is a difficult venture trying to help a man that thinks you are the one that needs help.
4. Having known this, it is important to know that your weakness is not a sin, it is the weakness that you refuse to confront that leads you into sin and becomes a lust.
5. Know in the background that God has made a way of escape for you in any kind of temptation you find yourself, so it is just simple sense that you turn to God and not trust that you can handle it yourself.
6. Tomorrow, we will pick a particular lust and see how we can practically confront it by being accountable in order to deal with it. We will be talking about masturbation.
I pray that God will help you to deal with any issues you have through these practically proven steps.
CONFESSION FOR THE DAY I will fulfil purpose. I will fulfil destiny.
PRAYERS FOR THE DAY Lord, I ask for the grace to deal with my weaknesses practically.
THOUGHT FOR THE DAY Keep thy heart with all diligence; for out of it are the issues of life.
ACTION PLAN FOR THE DAY Practically confront those weaknesses today.
No man is an island is a commonsaying that talks about the state of staying away and alone from others. It is not a good thing. This is why fellowship is important
Paul speaking in Gal, 3 said this:
“There is neither Jew nor Greek, there is neither slave nor free, there is neither male nor female; for you are all one in Christ Jesus.”
According to this, in heaven there will be no restrictions due to race, sex or social standing. It will all be about if you had Jesus or not.
This is not only going to be like this in heaven, but here also on earth. You are not meant to relate with people because of their sex, race or social standing in the society or school. It should be because they are born-again just like you. It should be because they are Christians just like you. Not because they are popular or have the best gadgets at home. Or because their parents are rich or their shoes are fine or they smell nice. What should matter is that they are born-again Christians.
As a Christian you should join other believers to worship God and for bible study at school, in church and every other place the followers of Christ gather to hear about God.
Jesus expects you to be in the midst and in constant connection to other believers. That way you don’t lose your calling as a Christian, you learn more about God and His word, and much more.
If you are not connected regularly to other believers, it opens up the door for the devil to introduce what being a Christian is not to you. You start to learn new things that could be harmful to you.
Another reason why you should be with other believers is that when you are lost, they can help to show you the way back home to God.
May the Lord help you to remain connected to the fellowship of believers. Amen
Prayer: Lord. Help me not to neglect the fellowship of the brethren. Help me to stay connected. Amen.
Action point: What gathering of believers do you need to join now?
In our concluding part, I will be talking about how your marriage can move up on the level of communication and become an intimate couple. The goal in every marriage should be to know each other and be as intimate with your spouse as much as possible.
We stopped at level 3 communication. Today, we will be looking at levels 4 and 5.
Level 4: Emotional Talk.
‘Let me tell you, How I feel’.
In this fourth level of Communication, we share our feelings. When our feelings are shared, we share ourselves. Because we are what and how we feel.
We are simply making ourselves vulnerable. When we share with our mate how we feel, the intention is not whether we are right or wrong. We mostly don’t want to be judged because of how we feel. We just need our spouse to listen, understand and accept that, thats the way we feel.
We kill intimacy when we are quick to judge the feeling. Am not saying we should not correct but first acknowledge your spouse feelings.
It is difficult for most people to share their feelings than their thoughts. These are 2 very different things
‘I feel that guy is a thief’. ‘I feel, the car will break down’ ‘I am thinking the issue with the woman is not natural’.
When you share your feelings you are expressive. When you don’t share your deepest feelings, a path of you is left hidden or covered. When you share your feelings, you are vulnerable, open, unashamed, no inhibitions.
Couple should aim at growing together into this fourth level of Communication, to enjoy a higher level of intimacy.
There is still the fifth level which is highest level of Communication.
Level 5 of Communication.
Loving, Genuine Truth Talk
‘Let’s Be Honest’.
This level allows us to speak the truth in love. It is a place of honesty without condemnation.
Most couples are finding out that such open, honest and loving communication enhances a much deeper level of intimacy. Where couples can share their feelings and thoughts without feeling unsafe. Both have a sense of safety and security. This requires an attitude of acceptance.
You know your spouse understands you even if they don’t agree with you.
We can always agree to disagree without shaming ourselves or making us look like less smart.
We can have differing opinions and still be friends. No hurts, no guilt, no condemnation and we are still good to go.
We can’t be the same. Remember, acceptance is the key.
We may start out on the first level of Communication, bit please don’t let us remain there.
As a couple we should aim at moving higher in the way we relate, understand and communicate with each other.
This will require certain level of work and being intentional about getting to understand your spouse.
The higher we grow in our Kevel of communicating with ourselves the more intimate we grow with our spouse.
I pray God will grant us wisdom and grace and help is all to communicate better in Jesus name.
God bless our marriage.
CONFESSION FOR THE DAY I know how to communicate with my wife
PRAYER FOR THE DAY Lord, give me wisdom
THOUGHT FOR THE DAY Eph 5:22 KJV Wives, submit yourselves unto your own husbands, as unto the Lord.
Yesterday, we began this discussion on how to confront addictions and bad habits.
We mentioned three points:
1. Be honest with God 2. Nail down a stake 3. Connect with God’s power
Here is the conclusion.
4. Renew your mind This is absolutely important. How do you renew your mind? By reading and studying God’s word regularly.
And be not conformed to this world: but be ye transformed by the renewing of your mind, that ye may prove what is that good, and acceptable, and perfect, will of God. (Romans 12:2 KJV)
Here is Message translation:
Don’t become so well-adjusted to your culture that you fit into it without even thinking. Instead, fix your attention on God. You’ll be changed from the inside out. Readily recognize what he wants from you, and quickly respond to it. Unlike the culture around you, always dragging you down to its level of immaturity, God brings the best out of you, develops well-formed maturity in you.
5. Focus your eyes You need to focus your eyes and stop all the bad habits. For example, if you view pornography on your phones or tab which leads to other Jeru trip, simply stop viewing those things. Don’t walk down to a cyber-café, knowing what will happen there.
6. Control your body Put your body under. Your body is not supposed to be giving direction or instructions. Your body is supposed to take instructions from your recreated human spirit.
7. Confide in a friend/mentor Have somebody you trust that you can talk to. Sin is perpetuated in the atmosphere of secrecy. Whatever you expose loses its power. Make sure you have somebody you can confide in.
8. Avoid tempting situations Do not go to compromising areas. Do not feed your weaknesses. While trying to fix a bad habit, it is a wrong time to attend a night party. If you have a problem with Jeru trip with a certain guy or lady, then don’t pack your bags to go and spend the weekend there! If you have issues with a married man or woman, stop picking the calls and stop going with him or her to Guesthouses!
9. Press on despite failures One mistake, while you try to stand straight, does not end it all. Press on, and never give up in your resolve to destroy what is attempting to destroy you. A just man may fall seven times, but He rises up again. He doesn’t stay down!
10. Go for total victory. Go for total victory because victory is in your DNA. You are designed to win. Jesus won on your behalf.
I pray for you this morning, you will not fail and you will not miss it. I declare your courtship/marriage blessed this day! You will not be cut off in the midst of your days. You will fulfill your destiny. I curse every distraction in your life. I come against every militating spirit against your destiny. I cancel every handwriting and ordinance against you. I break and severe you from every strange soul ties and I proclaim your freedom this day in Jesus name. Whosoever the son shall set free shall be free indeed, so I proclaim you free in Jesus name!
CONFESSION FOR THE DAY I am helped by God to confront addictions.
PRAYER FOR THE DAY Lord, give me the strength to confront any known addiction in my life
THOUGHT FOR THE DAY Job 31:1 KJV I made a covenant with mine eyes; why then should I think upon a maid?.
ACTION PLAN FOR THE DAY Decide to stop all forms of compromise and confront addictions slowing you down
We live in a world where negative things are so rampant that they are all over the place. We pick habits here and there largely from the environment and from friends. Some of these habits are unhealthy for us in many ways. This may include drinking, smoking, sleeping around, gambling, masturbation, pornography, and so on.
When you have an issue you are dealing with, there are steps to take to overcome them and we are going to be looking at these steps this morning in a general sense. Whatever situation you find yourself in and whatever issues you are dealing with, there are always ways to overcome them.
In the scriptures, God has not left us helpless. He has designed ways out for us in any mess or situation we find ourselves in. In fact, He has wrought victory for us in every area of our lives.
The strategy of the devil is to take advantage of our ignorance. When you are not filled with God’s word, you will not be able to walk in the fullness of the victory that God has wrought for us.
The word of God strengthens. The word of God equips. The word of God sets free. Sin is not supposed to have dominion over us again. We have been made free! For example, many believers are still under the influence of habitual sins. May still drink. Many still masturbate. These habitual sins may be prevalent, but they are not supposed to be the norm.
Why is it important to confront habitual sins? You have to work at stopping habitual sins so that you can grow in God, enjoy the fullness of His blessings, and fulfill your ministry.
Here are ten general steps you can take to deal with any habitual sin in your life.
1. Be honest with God
This is the first step. You have to be sincere with God. You have to come clean for God to help you. Never try to deceive God. He knows all things and He sees all things. But God wants accountability. That was why He asked Adam, “Where art thou?” The scriptures says, “Be not deceived, God is not mocked…” So when you go before God, be truthful. Before Jacob’s name was changed from a deceiver to a Prince, he was asked, “What is thy name?” and He had to answer truthfully.
2. Nail down a stake
A stake is used to identify an important spot or the beginning of a journey. Decide before God to put a stop to it. The scripture says sin shall not have dominion over you. Make up your mind and ask God to help you. Don’t just continue living hopelessly and helplessly.
3. Connect with God’s power
You will need God’s power. There are habits you cannot overcome in your own strength. God never designed you to overcome them in your own strength or wisdom. As a believer, you have been configured to survive with the help of the Holy Spirit. Connect with that power and walk in the Spirit and you will not fulfill the lust of the flesh.
I will stop here for today and continue tomorrow by showing us more ways to confront addictions.
CONFESSION FOR THE DAY I am helped by God to confront addictions.
PRAYER FOR THE DAY Lord, give me the strength to confront any known addiction in my life
THOUGHT FOR THE DAY Job 31:1 KJVI made a covenant with mine eyes; why then should I think upon a maid?.
ACTION PLAN FOR THE DAY Decide to stop all forms of compromise and confront addictions slowing you down
