Do you mean the Bible advises on some form of intoxication? Do you mean I can really get high and still make heaven?
Well, it depends on what is intoxicating you!
The Holy Writ expressly and without mincing words says you should be intoxicated with your wife!
Really?
Go ahead and read it for yourself!
Proverbs 5:18-19 English Standard Version 2016 (ESV) Let your fountain be blessed, and rejoice in the wife of your youth, a lovely deer, a graceful doe. Let her breasts fill you at all times with delight; be intoxicated always in her love.
Be Intoxicated Always!
To be intoxicated means to be drunk or under the influence of drugs.
Just that the drug is now the love for your wife!
Why would God be advising this?
He knows times will come and you will be irritated with your wife for several reasons. Some genuine, some out of ignorance, some out of arrogance, and some just some selfish ego trip.
It becomes even more intense when you are irritated with your wife and getting intoxicated with another! Ha!
That is sitting on a keg of powder! You ready don’t want to do that! I’m just advising you ni o!
So choose your source of intoxication wisely! Be enraptured with her love always! Please take my advice and have peace of mind!
Be Intoxicated Always!
My Birthday Gift For You and Your Loved One!
In another good news, I will be 51 in a few days! What? It’s amazing to realize that it’s been 51 years! I feel 21!
God has been faithful. The faithfulness of God is like a check that you can take to the bank with your full chest!
His faithfulness never fails! Not once!
Has God been faithful to me?
The answer is Yes, a billion times! God has been faithful to me!
On my birthday and the day after, I will have a FREE webinar for Singles and Couples! That will be my gift for you!
It’s going to be a loaded one you don’t want to miss! Registration is Free but required and you can find details and registration link below!
Joy is a serious business of heaven, so says Rev, Mark Hankins
As I was meditating on the phrase, the Holy Spirit whispered in my spirit,
“If joy is the serious business of heaven, then sorrow must be the serious business of hell!
Don’t Let The Devil Steal Your Joy
Sorrow, perpetual guilt, depression, despondency, and regrets are the tools of hell to create a loophole, entry point, and landing place for the cohorts of hell
The devil cannot just access your life, finances, family and so on, with a loophole Such loopholes are created when you lose your joy!
Later today, I will post a message on joy you need to listen to!
Marriage wine can often dry up, turn sour, or simply lose taste. Relationships can lose the spark, the fun, and the glee!
Love can wane, can grow old, and can fast dissipate. Feelings are fickle, never with a forever status.
What do you do when love seems to wane, when the tummy butterflies have all rested their wings, love birds have no more songs, when his or her words evoke no more feelings, and the blushing, the dimples, and the smiles have all gone?
What do you do at such times?
You are in courtship and everything seems intense, but of recently, you are no longer excited.
You don’t even look forward to hearing from each other and yet you still have peace that you are in the right relationship.
You are married, and the marriage bed has gone cold.
Intimacy used to be a trip but right now it is a complete bore. You could almost be reading a novel while you are at it. And yet the Bible unequivocally advises that Pro 5:19 (KJV) Let her be as the loving hind and pleasant roe; let her breasts satisfy thee at all times; and be thou ravished always with her love.
What happened?
Here are a few things that could steal the wine off the marriage shelf, that could sap out and zap off every fun in the union.
What To Do When Love Wanes
1. When you allow pressures to stifle the pleasure
There will always be pressures, especially pressures from work. Wise husbands and wives learn to leave office pressures at the office and not bring them home.
For those in courtship, do not allow work pressures to swallow up fun communication times, times of bonding, and times of aligning the souls.
Decide to enjoy your courtship through vibrant communication and unhindered flow irrespective of the pressures that be
What To Do When Love Wanes
2. When you allow the hustles and bustles of life to steal your rest in God
Whether you like it or not, there will always be issues to deal with.
You must have a commitment to each other in a relationship or marriage to put each other first place after God.
3. When you refuse to spend quality time together
Love will wane when you don’t spend time with each other.
Nothing will ever replace quality time spent together enriched with destiny discussions and plans for the future.
Those times of fellowship can never be replaced with any other thing
For singles in courtship, this quality time must not be tainted with sexual sins.
With compromise, quality time will become dangerous time, bringing with it, damnation and guilt.
But essentially, it’s no longer about you alone, it’s now the two of you!
Are You Single Or Married?
2. You must be responsible
Marriage life requires responsibility. It’s a life of being responsible.
You don’t live for yourself alone. You think about your spouse and your family’s well-being.
You think and carry the thoughts of your family everywhere you go.
That will inform your decision at the time. You don’t just wake up one morning and decide to travel for three weeks.
Your life as a married man or woman must reflect responsibility in all areas.
That’s why society frowns at it if a married woman or man dresses seductively because that is not expected of him/her. A married person is expected to be responsible.
God bless you this morning! Have a fantastic day ahead!
Marriage is a lifelong journey and you want to be sure you travel light.
You don’t want to carry unnecessary baggage that will make your journey strenuous and unpleasant.
There are stuff that are anti-blissful marriage.
Someone once said if you want to travel by flight you go light.
That is why your luggage is weighed at the airport before you board the plane.
If the purpose of God for your marriage and home is going to be accomplished, you must decide to let go of certain habits or mindsets.
They may not necessarily be sins but the Bible talks about laying aside the weight that easily beset us.
Heb 12:1 Wherefore seeing we also are compassed about with so great a cloud of witnesses, let us lay aside every weight, and the sin which doth so easily beset us, and let us run with patience the race that is set before us.
Your marriage is the race set before you and you must be prepared to run it with patience. You will not make a shipwreck of your marriage in Jesus’ name.
I’ll be writing to the men today as they are the leaders of the house.
Loving your wife doesn’t sometimes come naturally, especially if you have been married for a while. To love your wife, you have to learn it and practice it from time to time.
Here are practical ways to love your wives as recorded in the scriptures.
Eph 5:25-28 MSG – Husbands, go all out in your love for your wives, exactly as Christ did for the church–a love marked by giving, not getting. Christ’s love makes the church whole. His words evoke her beauty. Everything he does and says is designed to bring the best out of her, dressing her in dazzling white silk, radiant with holiness. And that is how husbands ought to love their wives. They’re really doing themselves a favor–since they’re already “one” in marriage.
Strategies for Loving Your Wife Like Never Before
1. Go all out for her: This is the first instruction given in the passage above. Go out of your way. Go all out in your love. Don’t hold back in expressing your love for your wife. Love your wife deeply. Love her with your substance. Love her with your commitments.
Love her genuinely and be interested in her progress, all around. Express that love both in action and in words Do not give your emotional space to any other except for her. Go all out for her even in your emotions!
Be there for her emotionally. This means being there to listen, understand, and comfort her during both the good times and the challenging ones.
Strategies for Loving Your Wife Like Never Before
2. Give, don’t just get: As a husband, let your love be marked by giving, not just by getting. Be a giver. That’s the way things are done. Give your time. Give your attention. Give your love. Give them to your family, not to a strange woman out there. Provide for the family. Go the extra mile to make her happy. Let your family be your priority.
Marriage is sacrifice. Let your wife see your love, commitment, and sacrifice.
Give her your time! Sacrificing time for meaningful, quality moments together is crucial
What else can you give? Thoughtful gestures will go a long way! Surprising her with a treat, leaving romantic notes, or having date nights can make her feel cherished and loved.
Don’t just get intimacy, give her too. Give her a listening ear and a shoulder to lean on, she will need it when she is down
You Will Be Joy-Full!. Happy New Month! Welcome to October! It will be a great month for you in Jesus’ name!
This month is our month of JOY-FULL! Your joy will be full in Jesus’ name!
Joh 16:24 (KJV) Hitherto have ye asked nothing in my name: ask, and ye shall receive, THAT YOUR JOY MAY BE FULL.
1Jn 1:4 (KJV) And these things write we unto you, THAT YOUR JOY MAY BE FULL.
God wants your joy to be full!
The question is, “What is that thing that God will do that will cause your joy to be full this month?
In your relationship or marriage, business or career, what is that thing that God would that will cause your joy to be full?
Get ready for it to be done! You Will Be Joy-Full!
Hitherto, you have asked nothing, go ahead and ask now! Hitherto, you have not really been in faith because you think it can’t be done. Well, go ahead and ask now, because God is going to do it!
I pray for you according to the word of the Lord, this month your joy will be full.
Something great, something beautiful, something extraordinary, something that will make you laugh, rejoice, and dance, that thing will be a reality in your life in Jesus’ name!
So what do you do?
Start rejoicing before the rejoicing!
There is always a dance before the dance! You Will Be Joy-Full!
To celebrate this month, we have an incredible resource for Singles and Couples alike! We are going to give you the ability to enjoy the first set of classes for just a peanut! Why are we doing this? We want all of you to enjoy this resource in your relationship or marriage, single or couple alike. Find the deals below!
For Couples:
The 7-Week Ultimate Marriage Course: Reconnect is a seven-week experience consisting of seven videos to watch, a workbook session and a session with Rev Dunamis and Sophia and the cost is N70,000
However, as a new month package, couples can have the first class, with the workbook for session 1 for only N2,000! That’s crazy, right? Well, you will be able to have an idea of what the course is all about for a peanut You will also have access to a workbook session for Class 1. So go ahead, it’s only available for a limited time Go ahead and register here – https://kissesandhuggs.selar.co/sample
For Singles:
We also have an incredible new month package for singles in courtship or preparing for a wedding in the near future. There is a special pre-wedding session for Singles at 50,000
For a new month package, you can have Class One complete with Sample Video and workbook for only 1,500! Yes, you heard me right! That is less than $2
We all have seeds to sow in our marriage at every point in time.
God will never leave any man without a seed. Seed is the only influence we have to change our tomorrow.
God used the principle of seed time and harvest. The whole world we see today started with just one man and one woman but today we have billions of men and women who have lived on the face of the earth.
If you have the seed(s) and you recognize the seed you have, you can change your future.
Everyone married has seeds and we have to see them and put them to use or sow them. Having seeds is useless if it is not planted. It abideth alone, so says the scriptures.
Two Seeds To Sow Into Your Marriage
1. The Seed of Time:
Every one of us has the gift of time. The people whose marriages are blissful have 24 hours and those whose marriages are troublesome also have 24 hours. The question is: what are you doing with your time?
You cannot be partying around and expect your marriage to come out better than those who give attention to their marriage. How much time in 24 hours do you give or dedicate to your family, after God?
Your marriage is like a garden. If you want a good garden, you have to spend time tending it. How much time do you spend together to talk about yourselves and get to know each other more? You have to sow the seed of time in the right direction to reap the right harvest in your marriage.
Two Seeds To Sow Into Your Marriage
2. The Seed of Words:
We all can speak. We all have the gift of words but what are we saying in our marriage?
Pro 18:21 Death and life are in the power of the tongue: and they that love it shall eat the fruit thereof.
By using their tongues negatively, some people have literally destroyed their marriages. Some curse their spouse and with their own hands have pulled down their marriage.
They destroyed the wealth of their husband and made the creativity of their wife nonsense by their negative tongues.
Some of us don’t curse but we also don’t bless our marriage and our spouse. We should consciously bless (speak good things about) our marriage and spouse.
Even when things are not working as they should be or your spouse does not know the Lord as he/she should, that’s the best time to continually declare God’s word over them.
God used the same principle
Gen 1:2-3 And the earth was without form, and void; and darkness was upon the face of the deep. And the Spirit of God moved upon the face of the waters. 3. And God said, Let there be light: and there was light.
He spoke when the earth was without form and void. He spoke about what He wanted to see.
A man of God said in his book that God spoke to him one day, “My people are busy saying what they can see, what is happening, instead of saying what they want to see”
You have to say what you want to see. Then in time, you will have what you say
Mar 11:23 For verily I say unto you, That whosoever shall say unto this mountain, Be thou removed, and be thou cast into the sea; and shall not doubt in his heart, but shall believe that those things which he saith shall come to pass; he shall have whatsoever he saith.
May God grant us understanding.
God bless your marriage. We shall continue tomorrow by God’s Grace
What Happened On Your Wedding Day The day you walk down that aisle, something happens.
It’s almost crazy! Your body is no longer your own, it belongs to your spouse.
A fusion takes place in the realm of the spirit, that is so strong that God proclaimed, “Let no man put asunder!”
God becomes the witness of this union, and any attempt to drive a wedge in between this union is coming against God Himself.
As couples who are believers, and well-grounded, the weapon of the devil against you is strategic.
If you are a weak believer with no firm resolve, he can easily bring adultery and infidelity to the table and you will be swept off your feet if you are far from God.
But with those who may be grounded, his weapon is to keep you divided, torment you in your thoughts, and keep you perpetually in strife.
You are not in adultery, but in your mind, you are probably worse off.
What Happened On Your Wedding Day
This will affect the whole family because your thoughts are magnetic and will determine a lot of things around you
How will you pray and agree together when the mind of one of the spouses is riddled with doubt, contempt, and dislike for the other?
Your spouse is easily excited talking to others but irritated when you are alone.
The friend you saw in your spouse as courting sweethearts has evaporated into thin air!
Before you start blaming him or her, you should take responsibility first for where you find yourself, humble yourself, and ask God to help you.
It is another problem entirely when you keep blaming your spouse for your actions, neglect, and carelessness. That can be unfair and you will never change that way.
What Happened On Your Wedding Day
It is like a General Manager who keeps blaming his employees for losses and the employees who keep blaming the Manager for their ineffectiveness. That organization is in a quandary!
Stop the blame game! It is a trap of the devil.
See, there is no point wasting your time, there is much to do!
Why would you fast forty days and then use four days of strife to rubbish everything?
Why would you sow seeds for years and then pull them out with careless, selfish thoughts and words?
Common, get on the same page and combine your weapons against the enemy of your soul.
From the day you get married, you can no longer do it alone!
So, get over trivial issues, be it husband or wife, and be on the same page so that you can both enjoy the fullness of God’s blessings in your life.
Let’s talk a little about the power we all have. Whether you are married or single, man or woman, tall or short, rich or poor, privileged or disadvantaged. We all have this very unique power.
We have long been ignoring this power.
It is the same power God used to create the world and Jesus during His earthly ministry used it all through.
Jesus, our perfect example taught us ‘the how’ to recognize this power.
He showed us how to effectively use it to our advantage no matter what we are going through or what the issue is.
I am talking of the power of the little organ right in our mouth!
Wow! I am sure most of you were thinking, Oh, what is that great power I have?
Well, that is it!
It is as simple as that.
Every Couple’s Got It
It is right there when you open your mouth, and it is the power of your ‘TONGUE’.
Let’s see what the Bible says about our tongue.
Pro 18:21 Death and life are in the power of the tongue, and they who indulge in it shall eat the fruit of it [for death or life]. [Matt. 12:37.]
And as a result, this is what happens:
Pro 18:20 A man’s [moral] self shall be filled with the fruit of his mouth; and with the consequence of his words he must be satisfied [whether good or evil].
This is an open cheque. The bible says we shall eat the fruit of our tongue whether life or death.
That means God is giving everybody equal chances to create the fruit they will eventually eat in their life and of course, marriage.
You cannot be saying death and expect to eat life.
The thing there is that, the devil makes us unaware of this power and in turn makes us say careless words about our marriage, ourselves, and life in general.
We just speak words as though those words don’t have any effect on our lives.
Become deliberate and don’t just say anything that is not ‘life’ from your mouth.
Use your tongue to bless yourself, your marriage, your children, your work, your business, your everyday situation, and your circumstances.
Don’t envy the fruits of another person. Every Couple’s Got It
Everybody will eventually eat the fruits of what they have been saying over time.
Begin to bless that husband of yours. Begin to bless and speak life to your wife.
Before long, you will begin to eat the fruits of your tongue.
Everybody has got to tend their garden, and tending your garden requires handwork and not giving up.
The grass is always greener on the other side but somebody is tending it.
There are so many things you can do to make your marriage blissful and happy.
But like Jesus told Martha that faithful afternoon, ” One thing is needed and Mary has chosen it and it will not be taken from her.
Luk 10:41-42 (KJV) And Jesus answered and said unto her, Martha, Martha, thou art careful and troubled about many things: [42] But one thing is needful: and Mary hath chosen that good part, which shall not be taken away from her.
Here is God asking you whether you are willing to do what it takes for your marriage to be what it ought to be.
What He will be asking you to do may be different from what He is asking me to do.
We will all be required to do different things at different times.
Joy is crucial, my dear! Joy in the Holy Spirit is one of your greatest weapons that you must hold tightly to as a lifestyle!
Joy is crucial to your continual victory in the everyday endeavour!
Joy has been given to you by God to employ against the vicissitudes of life!
Joy doesn’t come automatically, it is always a decision to make!
Hab 3:17-18 (KJV) Although the fig tree shall not blossom, neither shall fruit be in the vines; the labour of the olive shall fail, and the fields shall yield no meat; the flock shall be cut off from the fold, and there shall be no herd in the stalls: [18] Yet I will rejoice in the LORD, I will joy in the God of my salvation.
All of those things might happen, yet…!
Broken relationships, yet I will rejoice!
Disappointed a few weeks before the wedding, yet I will rejoice!
We are used to instant victory. Indomie noddles kind of thing.
Even in natural things, nothing just happens. There are no instant millionaires.
In a weight loss programme, it’s easier to gain weight than it is to lose it.
You gain more calories by eating cakes, pastries, and ice cream. You will have to work out for hours and days to lose what you have gained.
My point is, you cannot have an instant weight loss or anything for that matter.
In the same way, we cannot expect instant victory over where we have been defeated before. It takes time and effort.
The Power of Incremental Progress
Some of us have been used to a certain way of thinking and doing things (in a negative way).
We have learned certain bad habits that are not making our marriage work out.
We shout, lie, are selfish and self-centered, we are bossy, we nag, we are lazy, we are insincere, we are not trustworthy, we unnecessarily keep quiet and withdraw, and the list goes on.
It took you years to get to that point and then you are expecting an instant change.
Deu 7:22 And the Lord your God will clear out those nations before you, little by little; you may not consume them quickly, lest the beasts of the field increase among you.
Deu 7:23 But the Lord your God will give them over to you and will confuse them with a mighty panic until they are destroyed.
The Power of Incremental Progress
This is God talking to us. He says your victory will come ‘little by little’.
I feel this little-by-little victory causes us to be sober and keeps us coming to God holding on to Him and looking up to Him for His Mercy.
I believe ‘ the beast of the field’ among us is PRIDE.
Where we feel, ‘ Yes, I can press the button, and …the victory comes.
Remember it took Jesus, dying on the cross to give us this victory. It was a great price.
So don’t get discouraged on your journey to making your marriage beautiful.
Pro 23:18 For surely there is a latter end [a future and a reward], and your hope and expectation shall not be cut off.
God has promised you victory. He has promised that your expectations will not be cut off.
That marriage will be blissful.
That husband will love you.
That wife will be supportive and submissive.
Those children will be obedient and together as a family you will enjoy prosperity. You will move forward. You will increase.
That contract will come through.
God bless your marriage.
Rev. Sophia Okunowo
Giving & Partnership with Ministry Kisses and Huggs Club MONIEPOINT: 8247660079 GTB:0150088032
1. Marriage is so demanding, that God has to understand.
God wants you to put him first place in your life. Every other thing can come later. Our God is a jealous God. No matter how demanding marriage is, God wants you to give him what’s his.
Your family shouldn’t take the place of God. Likewise your business or career. Your waking moment as a family should be given back to God. Create time out of no time to give back to God.
Four Critical Beliefs to Ditch
2. I can flirt a little since I am not sure what my spouse is doing as well.
This is nothing but a deception from hell. Never allow evil to manipulate your thought pattern. If you give the devil an inch, he will take a mile from you. Stay away from all forms of compromise. Focus on your spouse. Don’t give the devil an avenue to strike your family. Marriage is a covenant, so don’t joke with it.
You don’t say things like I will ‘show’ you. You are actually ‘showing’ yourself because you are one in marriage. Yes, disagreement will come but you need to resolve it quickly and immediately, so as not to give room for funny thoughts. If you and your spouse are not on talking terms, you need to deal with the hurt first and then ask for God’s help. Seek counsel from someone you both submit to.
Four Critical Beliefs to Ditch
4. I make money available, what else do they want?
Money is good. It is important in marriage but it should not be placed above your family. Your wife wants time and attention. Your children need their father. Yes, you need to provide for your family, but not at their expense. You can plan a vacation, a retreat etc. Just make sure you are there for your family.
I pray for you this morning, every situation in your home is corrected by the mercies of God right now. The shalom of God envelopes your marriage. The joy you once had about your spouse is restored right now in the name of Jesus.
Certainly––but only within a certain context. It’s good for a man to have a wife, and for a woman to have a husband. Sexual drives are strong, but marriage is strong enough to contain them and provide for a balanced and fulfilling sexual life in a world of sexual disorder. (1 Corinthians 7:2 Message)
As married couples, make sure you satisfy each other sexually. You will chase adultery away like that. But, Pastor my husband has a higher libido and wants it all the time! Receive grace to satisfy him, okay?
With understanding and love, you will be able to strike a balance but make sure he is not frustrated to the point of considering exploring and looking for it outside.
You have married because you are to help each other. Don’t deny one another in the bedroom.
Depths of Sexual Connection in Marriage 2
5. Comfort
Ask every married man; sexual intimacy can be so comforting with one’s spouse when he or she is down. In hard times, in difficult moments, when he or she is at the lowest ebb, sexual intimacy can be so comforting.
There are times when sexual intimacy is wanted and there are times when it is needed. Be sensitive. It is wanted when either spouse asks for it, it is needed when your spouse is down and you decide to comfort your spouse.
Outside of marriage, it brings confusion, disorder, selfishness, and outright disobedience to God’s way of doing things. Now you don’t want to be in a place where you will not have God’s support, and favor.
The question is would you rather go for confusion rather than comfort?
God wanted you to have pleasure! Conception and reproduction could have taken place in a million ways. Some cellular division could have taken place and there would be kids staring at you. But God wanted pleasure!
God does not want intimacy without marriage commitment. God does not want you sleeping with everybody you set your eyes on. God in His divine wisdom knows what He is doing.
So why did God create Intimacy between a husband and wife?
1. Procreation
The first obvious reason why God created sexual intimacy is because of reproduction. The deposit of seed by the man, the fertilization process in women, the trimesters’ experiences, and the completion of the gestation period, are all processes that God designed to help us value human life.
If it had taken us less than two hours to get pregnant and then give birth, probably we would have been killing our kids once they offend or get stubborn or they didn’t come out cute since we could have another one in the next two hours!
The Depths of Sexual Connection in Marriage
2. Closeness
And Adam knew Eve his wife; and she conceived, and bare Cain, and said, I have gotten a man from the Lord. (Genesis 4:1 KJV)
This knowing is nothing more than sexual intimacy. When a couple who is married, a man and a woman, (not a man and a man, or a woman with another woman,) come together in sexual intimacy it is the highest possible way they can physically know themselves.
It brings a bond that cements the couple together. It is an expression of love for each other, stronger than a thousand words.
Let thy fountain be blessed: and rejoice with the wife of thy youth. Let her be as the loving hind and pleasant roe; let her breasts satisfy thee at all times; and be thou ravished always with her love (Proverbs 5:18-19 KJV).
God wants you to have pleasure! When you look at your wife and you are turned on in marriage, it is very holy! God didn’t make mistakes when He said let her breasts satisfy you at all times!
The problem begins when you start to derive satisfaction from the breast of another man’s wife or somebody you are not married to!
When the scripture says be thou ravished with her love, literal Hebrew says be thou intoxicated and enraptured with her love!
When all you are thinking the whole day, is about your wife and the sexual intimacy you will have with her later in the night, it is okay and holy! You need to understand that sex in itself is holy! It is when man decides to get selfish and disobedient that it becomes unholy.
There is one truth I want to drive in this morning! Whether single or married, this truth will be helpful for you!
The devil’s attempt is always to limit us by what we see. But the scripture is clear on what we are to do regarding that! See it below:
2Co 4:17-18 (KJV) For our light affliction, which is but for a moment, worketh for us a far more exceeding and eternal weight of glory; [18] While we look not at the things which are seen, but at the things which are not seen: for the things which are seen are temporal; but the things which are not seen are eternal.
This One Too Shall Pass
First of all, it says our affliction is light! It is not heavy enough to kill us. God is not a taskmaster and He would not allow us to be tempted beyond our strength!
He allows tests and trials, not to kill us but to work for us eventually.
But then there is an instruction in the above verse. Do not look at those things that are disturbing you. Please don’t focus on them. There is no need for your BP to rise!
Don’t give mental consideration and acceptance to the issues you are facing. Why?
They are temporal! Glory to God. They are not eternal. They do not have a forever status! They are transient and they shall pass. That is why I like the phrase “And it came to pass”
This One Too Shall Pass
Whatever it is, my dear, that one shall pass too
Those issues that were like life and death issues some five or ten years ago, where are they now? They passed. This one too will pass!
Who then do you focus on? Focus on God and His Word. Judge Him faithful. Meditate on His goodness always and you will experience that goodness in your relationship or marriage. Good morning!
Being married is a call to selflessness. God is love and love is an action word. Love is practical. You cannot say you love your spouse while you are being selfish. Just as you love yourself, you must love your spouse too.
Couples should avoid these types of selfishness
Don’t Be Selfish To Yourself
1. Selfishness in taking care of yourself
Self-care and self-love are recommended for healthy living, good mental health, and good self-esteem. However, in marriage, we are to look out for each other. A selfish spouse is known in few ways. How do you treat your spouse when he or she is ill? Some expect their spouse to be all over them, taking care of them. There is nothing wrong with this. In fact, that’s how it should be. However, everything is wrong, when you don’t reciprocate the same to your spouse.
You treat them with levity. Husband, how do you treat your wife when she is pregnant? Do you tell her to get up and do the house chores and cook because you don’t know how to cook?
Do you buy stuff for yourself and forget your spouse or buy a cheaper version for your spouse?
There’s a funny video on Instagram where the wife serves her husband food but hides more chicken in her own food. Are you like that? Learn to treat your spouse well, if not better than yourself.
Always find ways and opportunities to celebrate your spouse. Celebrate your spouse’s physical beauty, mental capacity, cooking skills, organizational skills etc
Appreciate them for them to be able to do better. Whatever you appreciate will not depreciate. Whatever you disregard, depreciates.
Always look for ways in casual conversations with friends and colleagues to celebrate your spouse. Never miss an opportunity to do this. It could be very painful when you don’t celebrate your spouse but celebrate others. Do this and your spouse will learn from you to do the same.
My husband had to correct me on this. It is not hero worship, it is being minded of your spouse, being smart, and being their number one cheerleader. If you appreciate your spouse, you are appreciating yourself. Papa E.A Adeboye does that a lot. My husband too does this.
Some spouse are always blowing their own trumpet. Without attributing some accolade to their spouse, as if they don’t have any good qualities worthy of appreciation. Be very generous with appreciating your spouse. If you find it difficult to appreciate your spouse then you are not a grateful person. A grateful soul will always find things to appreciate about their spouse. This will also reflect on how grateful you are to God.
The deliverer’s greatest struggle is the deliverance within! Perhaps, that would be the greatest lesson from the life Mobhad, the young singer who just died. He was in the music industry, bringing fun, music, and excitement to others, while he was dying inside from harassment, bullying, and attacks from those he trusted. May God comfort his family.
Perhaps he tried to talk, but I doubted whether he actually spoke to those who could really help! It was a case of bringing fun to others while dying and eventually dying in the process.
A lot of Pastors are on this table. Preaching, teaching vibrating and yet dying slowly within, often with nobody to talk to! You see your greatest mistake would be not to seek help! A lot of young couples are sitting nicely on this table, watching their homes torn apart slowly and yet refusing to do the right thing!
Yes, it is possible. A person can be so proud that the pride rides him into the grave. The devil’s method is to keep you muted till you are lifeless. That will not be your portion!
Job was once frustrated He was bringing hope to many, being the greatest man in the East, and yet when he was at his lowest ebb, his friend disappointed him so much so that he said,
Job 16:2b (KJV) miserable comforters are ye all.
Have you ever been surrounded by the wrong comforters who bring more misery? Not all your friends can help you!
When The Deliverer Needs Deliverance
I was on this table sometimes back. I was dealing with a serious issue while bringing hope to many daily!
Well, I reached out to those above me, and thank God help came!
Would there even be a time, when you would not be dealing with something in your marriage? I doubt, as long as you are in days of your flesh! Jesus promised us victory, provided you reach out and seek help.
Most times it would cost you time, finances, and your ego!
When a person is not ready to sacrifice any of that, a crash is imminent!
You won’t know it all. Those you are admiring and comparing yourself with know where they seek help from, they are smarter.
A couple can keep quiet in their pride and watch their marriage and home degenerate! Going through the motions, helping others while you ate crying within. That is not God’s plan for you. Jesus already died for you, you don’t need to die for anybody!
Jesus Christ, with having direct access to God, still begged his friends and disciples to pray with him. Sadly they failed him.
When The Deliverer Needs Deliverance
In the moment when I needed help, a dear older woman of God got us some materials that totally arrested the situation! My wife and I diligently went through these materials over and over again, and then help came!
I have gone through the pain of putting this resource together online for your marriage, alongside the journal/workbook. You are your spouse will spend seven weeks to turn things around in your marriage, whatever the issue is.
Additionally, Pastor Sophia and I will have seven sessions with you and your spouse diligently crossing all the ’T’s and dotting all the ‘I’s in your marital endeavor, prayerfully trusting God to bring help to your situation, and even after the course, we will still be available to mentor you.
It is not free, No, it is not. If you wish to invest this in your marriage, then check it out HERE while the discount is still running. Husband or wife, run to your spouse and convince them to get on this programme asap because both of you have to do this together!
Cheers to a better, newer, fresher, and blessed marriage as you make the little investment! This investment will be “coins” compared to the lawyer’s fees and all the anguish and agony that comes to the whole family as a result of a separation or divorce.
Let’s look at a few more things you shouldn’t do to your spouse!
1. Don’t be selfish in Prayers
A couple can be selfish in the place of prayer when all prayer points are about them. They forget to pray for their spouse!
In this case, it is what is in the heart that is being played out. Your greatest prayers should be directed to your spouse in love. Pray for one another’s career business, desires, aspirations, and dreams. Be wise!
Invariably, you are praying for yourself when you pray for your spouse! God answers such prayers.
Don’t Do These To Your Spouse
Seven-Week-Marriage Rejuvenation
I am interested in the “The 7-Week Ultimate Marriage Course: Reconnect and Renew” with Pastors Dunamis & Sophia. I understand this will bring my spouse and I closer, restore and renew our love, and heal us where it’s hurting. Scan Code or Continue HERE
2. Don’t be selfish in family relationships
When there is selfishness in family relationships, either spouse would only get in touch, call, text, or chat, with parents and siblings.
Relationship with spouses’ family is zero! Hey, this is selfishness raised to power hundred!
You need to understand what the Bible says about marriage. You leave your parents and cleave to your spouse!
This does not mean you will not get in touch with them, but it does mean that your relationship must not be lopsided in favor of your own parents and siblings!
Prioritize your spouse and everything that concerns him and you will have less trouble.
Don’t Do These To Your Spouse
3. Don’t be selfish in cheerfulness
Here, you are cheerful with everybody, you make the whole world laugh, and you are the office comedian but at home, you are as cold as frozen fish! Not fair!
Your spouse cracks a joke and you look at them with disdain and disgust as if they just uttered some stupidity.
Another person cracks a less funny joke and you are reeling with laughter, with tears coming out of the corner of your eyes. It is called selfishness. If you are like that, you need a change of heart and some prayers too.
If your spouse cracks a joke, whether it is funny or not, just laugh! If you call their joke dry or senseless, then you are the spouse of a dry and senseless joker! Whatever you are doing to them is what you are doing to yourself. You are joined together.
If they crack a joke, just laugh, even if the joke is boring. Laugh. Be the number one fan of one another. This is how to keep the marriage going. There are many examples, but I would like to stop here.
