The word search is a verb; it is an act of looking for something. Looking for something with passion and not giving up until it is found.
There are several things that the word of God encourages us to search for, wisdom is one of it.
It’s very important that we seek to be wise as God’s children!
There are several reasons why you should search for wisdom as a child of God. One will be that it helps us to represent our father better because wisdom makes us exceptional.
The book of proverbs has helped identify more reasons you should search for wisdom, and want to be wise.
I hope you are set to learn something new this morning! Let’s look at our focus verse.
Blessed is the man who listens to me, watching daily at my doors, waiting at my doorway. For whoever finds me finds life and receives favor from the Lord. But whoever fails to find me harms himself; all who hate me love death.” –Proverbs 8:34-36 (NIV)
First of all, let me show you something interesting about this verse. You don’t get wisdom by wishing you were wise, or just praying to be wise. Wisdom comes by;
1. Watching Daily
2. Waiting daily
These two things denote taking efforts to search out something, and patients because it will take time to attain a certain level of wisdom, but that’s if you put in the work daily.
So, the question this morning is why should you and I search for wisdom?
Whoever finds wisdom will find life.
Whoever finds wisdom will receive favour from God.
Whoever doesn’t find wisdom will eventually harm himself.
Whoever hates wisdom loves death.
PRAYER: Father, help me to search for wisdom
ACTION PLAN: Memorize the Focus verse for today
DECLARATION: I am wise, I search for wisdom every day, and I have the help of God
A faithful man is a trustworthy man. He is a truthful man! A truthful man is not deceptive. He is not magma of flowing wickedness within covered with the façade of a nice man and waiting to erupt.
A faithful man loves a lady genuinely for who she is and not for what she gives. A faithful man is not out to satisfy his lust only to discard the lady later.
A faithful man will not insist on pre-marital sex, nay, his love for God will not prevail on the lady to compromise her virtue and offend God.
A faithful man is the protector of the lady’s body. He is not one to take advantage of her femininity!
A faithful man is not a Samson that lacks self-control and would not mind using his anointing to desecrate the one he is meant to take care of.
A faithful man is not a Samson that will preach and move in the Spirit one moment only to end up frolicking with prostitutes and ending up on Delilah’s lap.
A faithful man is not an Amnon that would profess his love one moment passionately and then would rape a Tamar the next moment.
A faithful man is not a Uriah that loves his job more than his wife all in the name of loyalty and then died in the process!
A faithful man is not a Judas that would greet and beg you with a kiss as a friend when all he is out for is your body to be crucified!
A faithful man will not compete with his wife. He is secure and he is happy when his wife is progressing.
A faithful man loves and does not lust. A faithful man does not scheme. He does not suddenly give his life to Jesus in order to marry a naïve and unsuspecting child of God and then takes his life back from Jesus after getting what he wants.
A faithful man will not raise his hands against a lady. The fear of God will not allow it knowing that he would be shooting himself in the leg by doing that!
A faithful man is not a gold-digger. A faithful man is not getting married to a lady because of papers and documents. A faithful man follows God’s direction in his life. A faithful man does not marry for money!
A faithful man does not teach against sexual perversion on the pulpit only to be caught up continually with masturbation, pornography, and fornication and yet without repentance!
A faithful man does not double date. He does not take advantage of the fragile emotions of ladies.
A faithful man does not scheme and he does not pretend.
A faithful man is a Joseph that loves God and will say a big NO to compromise knowing that compromise can truncate his destiny.
A faithful man learns to run away like Joseph in the face of sexual pressure and will not start speaking in tongues at such times. He learns to flee and will not spiritualize it by saying “let us reason together!
The list goes on but I will stop here for now. You can add your definition in the comment box.
Stay blessed!
CONFESSION FOR THE DAY I am a faithful man/virtuous woman.
PRAYER FOR THE DAY Lord, help me to become the person you have created me to be and let the faithful man/virtuous woman in me emerge
THOUGHT FOR THE DAY Thou shalt keep them, O LORD, thou shalt preserve them from this generation forever. –Psalms 12:7 (KJV)
ACTION PLAN FOR THE DAY Commit every issue in your relationship into the hands of God
Women can completely relate to the art of cooking, it’s a beautiful art that requires focus and mastery. When you want to eat a meal, it doesn’t just appear by merely desiring it, or just thinking about it.
It takes a lot of deliberateness to cook a nice and tasty meal. For food to be prepared a lot of things have to come together; these things are called ingredients.
Spice, proteins, vegetables, you name it. These things have to come together before you can have a meal, and depending on what you decide to combine, it results in the aroma, taste, and outlook of your end product.
Just like cooking is an art, marriage is also an art; the only difference is you can’t master it because every day is different.
But certainly, there are principles (ingredients) you can use to address every issue, to get certain results, regardless of whether it’s the same scenario or not.
Love is a major ingredient in marriage; it’s not just the feeling of butterflies or Goosebumps. Even those that have been married for a short while will agree with me that you don’t feel butterflies in your belly all the time.
What exactly is this ingredient called Love? Let us see what the bible says.
Love never gives up. Love cares more for others than for self. Love doesn’t want what it doesn’t have. Love doesn’t strut, Doesn’t have a swelled head, Doesn’t force itself on others, Isn’t always “me first,” Doesn’t fly off the handle, Doesn’t keep score of the sins of others, Doesn’t revel when others grovel, Takes pleasure in the flowering of truth, Puts up with anything, Trusts God always, Always looks for the best, Never looks back, but keeps going to the end. Love never dies. -1 Corinthians 13:4-8 (MSG)
As husband and wife, the greatest good you can do for yourselves is to love each other passionately, love yourself from the depths of your heart and really mean it.
Let love be without dissimulation.
I love the way that The Message Translation puts it.
Love from the center of who you are; don’t fake it. –Romans 12:9a (MSG)
Don’t fake love for each other; let your love be genuine, genuine love can be felt, and it will also reflect in every area.
Pray for one another’s weaknesses; take every anxiety and fear to God in the place of prayers. As you begin to do this, you will receive the strength to love your spouse appropriately and passionately.
So shall it be in Jesus name!
CONFESSION FOR THE DAY I will love my spouse unconditionally
PRAYER FOR THE DAY Lord, send your help into our marriage
THOUGHT FOR THE DAY He that is slow to wrath is of great understanding: but he that is hasty of spirit exalteth folly. –Proverbs 14:29 (KJV)
Still on our series to discovering wisdom this morning, we will yet consider one more thing to note about wisdom.
Our anchor scripture remains;
Counsel is mine, and sound wisdom: I am understanding; I have strength. By me kings reign, and princes decree justice. By me princes rule, and nobles, even all the judges of the earth. I love them that love me; and those that seek me early shall find me. Riches and honour are with me; yea, durable riches and righteousness. – Proverbs 8:14-18 (KJV)
8. Wisdom loves those who seek it.
One more thing about wisdom is that it loves those who seek it. If you are wisdom seeker, wisdom will love you.
If you go all out seeking for wisdom, you will find it.
There will always be a difference between someone who starts preparing for an examination from the beginning of the term, and someone who starts preparing for the same examination a day before the examination.
To get wisdom, you have to be intentional and deliberate about it.
A wise person is loved because he always something beneficial to give.
So here is the conclusion; if for any reason, you feel unloved by your parents, guardians, siblings, teachers, environment or whatever, go for wisdom.
Invest in your mind. Develop yourself. Focus on being a better you. I can assure you the narrative will change I er time.
A few days back, I began writing to you about “The Virtuous Woman”, I know a lot of you must be curious as to whether there is anything like a virtuous man, especially the lady folks.
Well, the scripture never mentions anything like a virtuous man but it did talk about men! And that is what I want us to see this morning.
The scriptures say about women:
Who can find a virtuous woman? For her price is far above rubies. –Proverbs 31:10 (KJV)
Then it says about men:
Most men will proclaim everyone his own goodness: but a faithful man who can find? –Proverbs 20:6 (KJV)
So essentially, the Bible talks about a virtuous woman and a faithful man!
The question is where can one find a faithful man? In fact, The Message translations say:
Lots of people claim to be loyal and loving, but where on earth can you find one? –Proverbs 20:6 (MSG)
The writer of Psalm 12 even sounds like you cannot find such a man again!
Help, LORD; for the godly man ceaseth; for the faithful fail from among the children of men. –Psalms 12:1 (KJV)
Other translations even added pepper on top!
HELP, LORD! For principled and godly people are here no more; faithfulness and the faithful vanish from among the sons of men. –Psalms 12:1 (AMP)
Quick, GOD, I need your helping hand! The last decent person just went down, All the friends I depended on gone. –Psalms 12:1 (MSG)
However, I will like you to know there are still faithful men! It takes a virtuous woman to be found by a faithful man!
There is someone that changes the equation of unfaithfulness. His name is Jesus. He is the only one that can make a difference in the life of a man and who can make the vilest of sinners become a faithful man!
Jesus saw Nathanael coming toward Him and said concerning him, See! Here is an Israelite indeed [a true descendant of Jacob], in whom there is no guile nor deceit nor falsehood nor duplicity! –John 1:47 (AMP)
In the above scripture, Jesus actually found a faithful man! You see when Jesus shows up on the scene, you will find faithful men!
So who is a faithful man? How do I identify one?
To be continued
CONFESSION FOR THE DAY I am a faithful man/virtuous woman.
PRAYER FOR THE DAY Lord, help me to become the person you have created me to be and let the faithful man/virtuous woman in me emerge
THOUGHT FOR THE DAY Thou shalt keep them, O LORD, thou shalt preserve them from this generation forever. –Psalms 12:7 (KJV)
ACTION PLAN FOR THE DAY Commit every issue in your relationship into the hands of God
Dear couple, today I want to show you a powerful weapon that works all the time. Regardless of whatever season you are in your life or marriage, this weapon is a formidable one.
Now therefore, our God, we thank thee, and praise thy glorious name. -1Chronicles 29:13 (KJV)
There is one thing that the enemy cannot resist; it is the power of praise, when you learn to praise God all your enemies fall down at your feet.
No matter what the problem or situation is praise is a way out, when you praise, worship, and give thanksgiving to God, the enemy is confused, and there is confusion in the enemy’s camp.
Be joyful always; pray continually; give thanks in all circumstances, for this is God’s will for you in Christ Jesus. -1Thessalonians 5:16-18 (NIV)
The devil hates joyful songs; he hates songs of adoration and thanksgiving to God, it gets him confused; he knows his strategy is not working, and his weaponry is not working.
His weapons won’t work because you are focused on something stronger, and better. you can’t be distracted, you are engaging the help of a God that consumes by fire.
Therefore, since we are receiving a kingdom that cannot be shaken, let us be thankful, and so worship God acceptably with reverence and awe, for our “God is a consuming fire.” -Hebrews 12:28-29 (NIV)
Praise God all alone when it looks like the situation is not working when it looks like things are going awry when it looks like the children are wayward.
Praise God when the finances don’t seem to be flowing, praise him into your breakthrough, and you will surely rejoice!
CONFESSION FOR THE DAY I will praise my God at all times, in every situation, and in every season
PRAYER FOR THE DAY Lord, teach me to praise always
THOUGHT FOR THE DAY Now, therefore, our God, we thank thee and praise thy glorious name. -1Chronicles 29:13 (KJV)
4. Wisdom gives Strength. Every child of God needs strength, strength to do the will of God. Sometimes doing what the bible says isn’t cool, especially when you want to impress your friends. So you will agree with me that strength is important in our day-to-day lives. Wisdom will give you and I this strength that’s what the bible says, when you have the wisdom of God then you will also have the strength to do the right thing at the right time.
Let’s refresh our memory with our focus verses;
Counsel is mine, and sound wisdom: I am understanding; I have strength. By me kings reign, and princes decree justice. By me princes rule, and nobles, even all the judges of the earth. I love them that love me; and those that seek me early shall find me. Riches and honour are with me; yea, durable riches and righteousness. Prov 8:14-18 (KJV)
5. Wisdom will make you reign as Kings do. God created us to reign on earth as kings, all of God’s sons and daughters are kings and queens, but you need God’s wisdom to function in your calling. Kings rule not only because they are called kings, but it’s also because they have the wisdom it takes to rule a kingdom, God wants you to be wise so he can trust you even as a child with certain things, you aren’t too young to be called king.
6. Wisdom will make you decree Justice like Princes. Justice is what God desires for his children on earth. Do you know what justice means? It means upholding what is right in all situations. Our God is a God of Justice, and he wants us to represent him on earth, so we all also have to be a people of justice. How do we decree justice? It’s by having God’s wisdom.
7. You will be able to rule as noble people do. God’s wisdom will not only help you to rule, it will also help people around you to identify you as a noble person whom they can learn from. It’s easy to identify wise people; you will be easily identified if you have the wisdom of God.
Some other things to know about wisdom are;
Wisdom loves those who seek it.
Those that seek wisdom early find it.
That’s the end of our teaching today, I pray God gives you His wisdom in Jesus name.
PRAYER: Father in the name of Jesus, please give me your wisdom.
ACTION PLAN: Memorize the focus verses for today.
DECLARATION: I have the wisdom of God, sound wisdom is mine.
A Virtuous woman puts the word of God first place, she is hard-working, and she is enterprising. She stirs up her gift. She is a believer, full of hope. She is a dreamer. She is a helper indeed. She is a wife not a knife. She is a supporter. She is an achiever. She is not a compromiser. She stands for the truth, she is full of integrity.
That is the woman to be! That is the woman to be or to go for! She can only be found by the man that God has prepared for her, so she is not desperate. She is patient to see God unveil His plan for her!
Not everybody is qualified to have her. A man that lacks self-control is not her potential candidate. It takes a king to have a queen. A deceptive man is not her candidate. A man that cannot zip up is not her attraction.
She is not tipped or trapped by a guy who is willing to compromise her virtue in order to satisfy his lust. She refuses to be fooled over and over again by a man who is only a sweet talker but a God hater! She will always go for a man that fears God!
If you find yourself falling short as a woman, don’t resign to fate, but rather start over in God. Make up your mind to make your life significant and to do it God’s way. And God will help you!
Here is the clincher, in every lady and woman is that seed of virtue! It doesn’t matter where you are now or where you have been, God sees you with the eyes of what you can be and what He has created you to be and not what you have done and that is why Jesus died for you while you are yet a sinner, so rise up with every fiber of your being and cry aloud: The virtuous woman in me is coming out!
I will do it God’s way! Respond to His love today and watch your life receive a turnaround!
CONFESSION FOR THE DAY I am a unique individual with a purpose to pursue and fulfill, I will forge ahead in destiny, the devil cannot hold me down.
PRAYER FOR THE DAY Father in Jesus’ name, I ask for a spirit of wisdom and revelation in discovering my purpose and the grace to maximize it.
THOUGHT FOR THE DAY If people can’t see what God is doing, they stumble all over themselves; But when they attend to what he reveals, they are most blessed. –Proverbs 29:18 (MSG)
ACTION PLAN FOR THE DAY Remove the mental block and limitation that exist only in your mind.
Dear couples in the house, it’s time to pray. If anyone asks you what time it is, tell them “it’s time to pray”.
It’s not time to play, sit, worry, think about the problem, complain about the situation, wish things were better, grumble at your maker, it is time to PRAY.
You’ve got to decide that this time, it is either you break through or you break through.
I am tired of where I am. I am tired of the status quo. I am tired of business as usual. I am tired of nothing much happening in my life. I am tired of “just being there”.
You’ve got to get to a point where you are no longer satisfied, a point where whatever is keeping you down-trodden must give way.
Whether it is a generational curse or something, it is time to get tired of it. Until you stop romancing your situation, don’t expect a change.
There are some things you have to break free from, some dangerous habits. Some things that are not making you move forward, some weights that keep drowning and pulling you back.
Some ungodly relationships you have to pull back from, some quarrels that are from the pit of hell, habits that only you know about.
You have to ask God to open the eyes of your understanding. You have to be ruthless with yourself. Whatever is not making you prosper or breakthrough, you have to address it in prayer. You must be ready to stick it out with God. God must know that “it is either He delivers you or He delivers you”.
This time I want you to make a quality decision. It is your time, and no one will take it from you. Make up your mind; decide to settle all that needs to be settled with God.
God said He will do a new thing.
I am believing Him not only for a new thing but for a new me; to be changed by the power of the most high God, to experience his Grace and His Mercy.
Set time out, a time set aside to wait on and for God, a time for God to break through in our homes, over our children.
All family issues will be dissolved during this time of prayer. All lineage issues will be broken. You will emerge. You will thrive. You will break through. God will decorate you with productivity in Jesus name.
God bless your marriage
CONFESSION FOR THE DAY Peace surrounds my home
PRAYER FOR THE DAY Lord, help me to see the peace you have surrounded me with
THOUGHT FOR THE DAY Because of that obedience, God lifted him high and honored him far beyond anyone or anything, ever, so that all created beings in heaven and on earth––even those long ago dead and buried––will bow in worship before this Jesus Christ. –Philippians 2:9-10 (MSG)
ACTION PLAN FOR THE DAY Meditate on “the benevolence of God”
Dear child, for a while now, I have been talking to you about wisdom. Our lessons have been from the book of Proverbs, we have had to digest King Solomon’s words bit by bit.
Continuing on our wisdom series, today I want to tell you what wisdom can do for you.
Let’s take a look at our focus verses!
Counsel is mine, and sound wisdom: I am understanding; I have strength. By me kings reign, and princes decree justice. By me princes rule, and nobles, even all the judges of the earth. I love them that love me; and those that seek me early shall find me. Riches and honour are with me; yea, durable riches and righteousness. Prov 8:14-18 (KJV)
1. Wisdom gives good Counsel. Everyone needs good counsel, it’s even more important for you as God’s baby to have good counsel because everyone around you looks to you for Christ-like morals and standards. What then is good counsel? Another word for counsel is advice, there is good and bad advice. What wisdom does is that it helps to know which is good and the kind of advice to reject.
2. You will get Sound wisdom. Reading God’s word will give you sound wisdom which means wisdom that is exceptional. You know how you admire certain persons when they speak, when they say things that leave every other person wondering how they are so smart, that’s another thing wisdom will do for you.
3. Wisdom gives Understanding. To understand means to clearly know something to the extent of explaining it in your own words. As a child, there are certain things that you might not be able to understand by yourself, but with the wisdom of God, you will have an understanding of all things. This is what makes you different from everyone around you.
To be continued.
PRAYER: Father in the name of Jesus, please give me your wisdom.
ACTION PLAN: Memorize the focus verses for today.
DECLARATION: I have the wisdom of God, sound wisdom is mine.
A virtuous woman is chaste. She is not available to everybody. She keeps herself for her husband. She is not generous with her body. Her price is far above rubies, she would not sell her body or give in to sex because of some amount of money.
She protects her body because she knows such things are wrong and that she would also be offending God. She does not fool herself.
She doesn’t party or frolic around. She is conscious of spiritual things. She has self-control. She develops herself before marriage. She is God-conscious.
She might have gone through some abuse, but she refuses to give up and be counted as one of the unfortunate statistics. She is a fighter. She knows that God would not consult her past to determine her future.
She might have had an abusive past, but she is willing to let her past go in order to master her future. She knows that she might have become the offspring of her past because of circumstances, but she can rebel and become the parent of her future.
She knows that the best days are ahead of her, so she pays the price for sexual sanctity by saying No to pre-marital sex. She respects her body, so others have no choice but also to respect her. She is The Proverbs 31 Woman
She knows that her source of strength is the word of God. She does not look for acceptance or love from guys; she seeks it from God because that is where it can only come from. She is truthful and she does not double-date.
She knows that double-dating is a rehearsal for adultery. She carries herself with dignity and will not allow every Tom and Jerry to fondle her body which is the temple of God!
She is a prayer machine! She prays for her fiancée and coming marriage. She knows that prayers and God’s word will solve every riddle, dissolve every enigma and bring solutions to impossible cases. The Proverbs 31 Woman
CONFESSION FOR THE DAY I am a unique individual with a purpose to pursue and fulfill.
PRAYER FOR THE DAY Father in Jesus’ name, I ask for a spirit of wisdom and revelation in discovering my purpose and the grace to maximize it.
THOUGHT FOR THE DAY If people can’t see what God is doing, they stumble all over themselves; But when they attend to what he reveals, they are most blessed. –Proverbs 29:18 (MSG)
ACTION PLAN FOR THE DAY Remove the mental block and limitations that exist only in your mind.
Before we can talk of keeping love ablaze we have to talk of couples living true to their covenant responsibilities. First, we should know that our marriage has a certain mandate in the heart of God to fulfill.
And here’s a second offense: You fill the place of worship with your whining and sniveling because you don’t get what you want from God. Do you know why? Simple. Because God was there as a witness when you spoke your marriage vows to your young bride, and now you’ve broken those vows, broken the faith-bond with your vowed companion, your covenant wife. God, not you, made marriage. His Spirit inhabits even the smallest details of marriage. And what does he want from marriage? Children of God, that’s what. So guard the spirit of marriage within you. Don’t cheat on your spouse. -Malachi 2:13-15 (MSG)
Let’s see how the scripture goes in the Amplified version.
Yet you ask, Why does He reject it? Because the Lord was witness [to the covenant made at your marriage] between you and the wife of your youth, against whom you have dealt treacherously and to whom you were faithless. Yet she is your companion and the wife of your covenant [made by your marriage vows]. -Malachi 2:14 (AMPC)
This is an indication that God takes our marriage vows seriously.
Our marriage vows are not just some cute words spoken on our wedding day, it is a promise before God and then to our spouse.
It is this understanding that will help us to see the reason why love must be kept ablaze, it is a lifelong work. We have to keep at it, at good times and not-so-good times, if we don’t understand the covenant of marriage, we will struggle.
Finally, let me add this for women. Being your best means being a virtuous woman, protecting your husband by satisfying him always sexually, know that his vulnerability will increase and become more intense if you don’t. Refuse to cheat on him no matter what, come what may.
I pray God helps us all in Jesus name.
CONFESSION FOR THE DAY The wine in my marriage will not run dry, our love is rekindled and our hearts burn for each other.
PRAYER FIR THE DAY Lord, help me to keep my marriage covenant
THOUGHT FOR THE DAY Yet you ask, Why does He reject it? Because the Lord was witness [to the covenant made at your marriage] between you and the wife of your youth, against whom you have dealt treacherously and to whom you were faithless. Yet she is your companion and the wife of your covenant [made by your marriage vows]. -Malachi 2:14 (AMPC)
ACTION PLAN FOR THE DAY Study the word ‘one flesh’
‘Virtuous’ from the Hebrew word ‘Chayil’ means excellence, strength, ability, efficiency and force.
The Bible talks about a Virtuous woman see how the scripture puts it;
Who can find a virtuous woman? For her price is far above rubies. –Proverbs 31:10 (KJV)
She is the woman considered ‘balanced.’ She has her acts together. She has wisdom and strength and the force of an army. She is the epitome of Christian virtue in feminine form. She is the one who has discovered the secret of drawing strength from her maker and Lord.
She is gracious and elegant in every way, strong within and she stands for what she believes. She is a woman who knows her individuality and uniqueness and yet submits her will, desires, and opinions to her husband.
She is not trapped, hindered, or subservient. She is just submissive. She is not limited or restricted, she is simply fantastic.
All these may not sound like what you see in your fiancée or what you are now as a lady, but there is a hidden desire in every lady to become the Proverbs 31 woman.
God does not focus on our past, or concentrate on how fragile we are in the present. God looks out with pleasure and sees what we are capable of becoming in the future.
We are all ‘projects in progress’ God is still very much at work within us, healing the wounds from our past and strengthening our weak hands. Don’t allow anybody to abuse or despise you. Don’t condemn yourself. Only one person can condemn you, and that is God! But he has refused to do that!
Believe in yourself! You are the virtuous woman in Proverbs 31; the writer just wanted you to have the honour of putting your name there by yourself. Remember, the one who formed you said ‘you are very good!’
CONFESSION FOR THE DAY I discover and develop my God-given gifts and talents.
PRAYER FOR THE DAY Father in Jesus’ name, I ask for a spirit of wisdom and revelation in discovering my purpose and the grace to maximize it.
THOUGHT FOR THE DAY If people can’t see what God is doing, they stumble all over themselves; But when they attend to what he reveals, they are most blessed. –Proverbs 29:18 (MSG)
ACTION PLAN FOR THE DAY Remove the mental block and limitations that exist only in your mind.
It is often said that a friend in need is a friend indeed. The value of friendship is known in hard and tough times. Nothing is as soothing as when a friend speaks to you in your down moments. When his or her words are like cold water to a thirsty soul.
If the effect of a friend could be that felt, how much more is the effect of a spouse? Of course, our spouse is supposed to be our best friend; who we are vulnerable with, with who we can share the joy and the privilege of being naked and not ashamed.
I think every spouse should ask themselves this question: “Am I a friend to my spouse?” Can your spouse confidently say, he/she can find a friend in you? Does your spouse find you easy to talk to?
Every spouse should ask these soul-searching questions and try to find answers to these questions.
It’s easy to point accusing fingers at your spouse, but are you also fulfilling your end? Quit playing the blame game and face reality, walk and work together to make a formidable team.
Can two walk together, except they be agreed? -Amos 3:3 (KJV)
Come in agreement with each other. Forgive every hurt and pain. Marriage is where we hurt deeply.
Some spouses are so hurt they vow never to forgive. If you have any knotty situations, talk things over with your mentors. Sometimes, the issues in marriage require the authority of someone higher than you, just a word, a prayer or a prophetic utterance can solve the issue.
Some people have destroyed their marriage because of staying on their viewpoint of being right. In marriage, it is not always about who is right or wrong, but our willingness to allow God’s purpose to be done.
Jesus our model didn’t insist on being right. He willingly suffered for us, the righteous for the unrighteous. He loved us while we were yet sinners and died for us so we can be made sons of God.
The mandate on our marriage must be fulfilled. Let’s get over with all forms of bitterness, malice, and unforgiveness, these are toxic to our being best of friends with our spouses.
A man that hath friends must shew himself friendly: and there is a friend that sticketh closer than a brother. –Proverbs 18:24 (KJV)
This scripture is very profound. You must show yourself friendly to have your spouse as your friend.
The issue is some of us don’t even know to be friends; we must aim at being friends with our spouses. I believe the Holy Spirit, the spirit of truth and revelation will help us if we ask Him to.
Here are some ways to be friends with your spouse:
1. Maintaining the right attitude and positive disposition is important.
2. Kind words and loving words; every human being responds to love.
3. Believing the best of each other.
4. Being fun to be with.
5. Not pointing attention to the weak areas of your spouse.
6. Encouraging our spouse.
7. Avoiding criticism, accusation, and blaming.
8. Being very understanding.
These are a few tips for being there for your spouse.
God help us indeed.
May God bless our marriages.
CONFESSION FOR THE DAY I am my spouse’s best friend, I am loving and kind towards him/her
PRAYER FOR THE DAY Lord, help me to keep my marriage covenant
THOUGHT FOR THE DAY A man that hath friends must shew himself friendly: and there is a friend that sticketh closer than a brother. –Proverbs 18:24 (KJV)
ACTION PLAN FOR THE DAY Study the word ‘one flesh’
Dear precious child, yesterday I began talking to you about what it means to Fear God. The fear Of God is the beginning of wisdom, and God wants you as his child to be wise, this is why the bible further explains what it means to fear God.
To fear the Lord is to hate evil; I hate pride and arrogance, evil behavior and perverse speech. –Proverbs 8:13 (NIV)
Yesterday we discussed two of these points mentioned in our focus verse:
1. The fear of God is to Hate Evil.
2. The fear of God is to Hate Pride and Arrogance.
Let’s continue today with the remaining two!
3. To Fear God is to Hate Evil Behaviour.
What exactly is evil behaviour? Things such as lying, stealing, gossiping, malice, unforgiveness, etc, these and more are more things like this are evil behaviour. There is a long list of commandments called the Ten Commandments that God gave the children of Israel through Moses. This is an indication that God wants us to act right all the time, if we as his children say we fear him, then you and I must hate any behaviour that is evil.
4. To Fear God is to Hate Perverse Speech.
Perverse speeches are wrong words, words that don’t build, but rather tire down, slang that are not godly. Children of God shouldn’t be found speaking vulgar languages or using slang that doesn’t represent Jesus. You are God’s ambassador on earth; everything you do should represent God.
This is the end of our lesson on what it means to fear God, make sure you put to use what you have learned.
PRAYER: Father in the name of Jesus, I pray that I have the fear of God in Jesus name.
ACTION PLAN: Decide to put in your best in all you do today
DECLARATION: I have the fear of God, I hate evil all the days of my life.
Sandy has been frustrated over and over again. She has been involved in several relationships that kept breaking and she is beginning to think she is cursed. All her friends are married and she seemed to be the only one left. The more desperate she became, the more relationships and marriage were evading her. She has prayed, fasted, and cried, and she doesn’t know what to do again.
On the other hand, Ade had so many girls he sleeps with regularly, and he feels that is being a man. Sadly he is misinformed and confused. He fails to realize that he has been sucked into a cycle of sexual perversion with damning consequences and only God can save him if he is genuinely repentant. The more he did that, the more he frustrates and truncates the plan of God for him in this area.
Buddy and Angie are married but are not enjoying their marriage one bit. They got married without knowing the purpose of marriage, hence abuse set it. They are both well-read and educated, but unfortunately, you are not taught how to run a marriage in school. You are left with deliberate tutoring through self-development or through mentors.
So now, the question is “how do you know the purpose of a relationship/marriage is being abused?
1. Experimenting is not the Purpose of a Relationship.
You see, a relationship is not supposed to be an experiment. It is something you initiate deliberately and purposefully. It is an institution created by God, and as such, it should be held as sacred. When God began the marriage institution, he had something in mind. He was not performing an experiment, he was deliberately packaging a purposeful institution. So, the moment you do anything experimentally, you have moved away from the original intention, hence the consequences.
2. Pre-marital sex is not the Purpose of a Relationship
During friendship or courtship, it is the mind that should be aligned, not the body. When the body comes together in a sexual relationship before marriage, the light of God’s word is tampered with because of violation and confusion enters the soul!
One common statement you will hear from people who are compromising is “I am confused!” They know it is wrong, and yet they are held in the embrace of sin because an illegal bonding has been formed. It takes God and guts to break such.
3. Initiating a relationship while still hurting or bitter.
I have said it over and over again, you don’t begin a relationship immediately after getting off one because you want to prove a point or you want to get back at your ex. At that point, your reasoning is impaired and your definition of love has been warped by the recent experience. It is always good to take a break for about six months and allow yourself to heal. Wisdom says you should find out what went wrong with the first one before you dabble into another.
If you have had several relationships broken over and over again, it is not about a curse anywhere, it is just that you lack wisdom and you are abusing the purpose of a relationship. You don’t enter a relationship because you want the person to fill some emptiness in your soul. That is only what Jesus Christ can do by His Spirit! If you haul a job meant for God on a guy or a lady, you will end up frustrating that person!
After a broken relationship, take your time. Ask questions. Why did it go wrong? Don’t jump into the next available arms just to deal with hurts and wounds. When you do that, you will get hurt the more, because you have not followed the right process. Never ever try to give sex in order to get attention or love. It will never work that way. Young ladies, drum that into your head and carry yourselves with some dignity!
CONFESSION FOR THE DAY I receive the spirit of wisdom and revelation in the discovery of my purpose, my role, and the purpose of marriage.
PRAYER FOR THE DAY Father, Lord help me to function with grace in the area of my calling. Anoint me for my calling as a husband/ wife in my marriage
THOUGHT FOR THE DAY We look at this Son and see the God who cannot be seen. We look at this Son and see God’s original purpose in everything created. –Colossians 1:15 (MSG)
ACTION PLAN FOR THE DAY Search every scripture on marriage in the bible to discover God’s mind and purpose for marriage.
