All of us know how we have tried threatening God before!
Lord, If I don’t meet my spouse by next month, I will marry just anybody that comes!
Yes, the threats come in many flavours and colours,.
And somehow, I believe God is never threatened.
He would probably be amused.
Those threats do nothing to God, but they can put you in the desperate mode.
That God is not threatened does not mean He is not concerned.
In fact, if you will like to know, God is more interested in your marriage than you are interested in it.
So, then why is it not happening?
For the same reasons!
He is not only concerned, He wants to ensure you get it right!
So He crosses the “T”s and Dots the “I”s.
God is never for once confused about the whole thing.
He has all of it figured out, not when you clocked twenty five, not even after you were born, but before you were ever born!
Yes, spouse, wedding, location, career and more were all figured out.
With God, you can never enter “one chance!
O Lord, I Must Marry Or…
Jeremiah 29:11 (MSG) I know what I’m doing. I have it all planned out—plans to take care of you, not abandon you, plans to give you the future you hope for.
Hey, take some rest, don’t panic! All of it has been planned out! Up to your bride’s maid and your ring bearer!
Even the food we will “chop” on that day!
Trust in God.
He will not fail you.
Try and look back, each time you try to put things in your hands, it wouldn’t work out!
So, rest in Him! Hold on. Be patient. You will see GOOD!
O Lord, I Must Marry Or…
For married couples, the same principle applies. God has played out how He will take care of you and your family! Just be sure to walk in His plans and follow His map! Stay with the divine blueprint by finding out His plans for your life at every stage and every phase. This is the secret of a long lasting successful relationship!
The Answer is Yes! You can marry an imperfect person because nobody is perfect. Nobody!
We are all a work in progress.
But wait… let’s make some clarifications.
An imperfect person is not someone who is living in an unrepentant habitual sin, sinning willfully and enjoying the pleasures of sin.
In other words, I am saying, you cannot marry someone who is living consistently in habitual sin, with no remorse or repentance.
Such a person is going to get you into trouble and drag you into misery.
About being imperfect, the scriptures let us know we will get better as we stay in the Word, study the Word, pray in the Spirit, and pay attention to the things of the Spirit.
Is your lover doing all these?
Can I Marry An Imperfect Person?
Check the scriptures:
2Co 3:18 (KJV) But we all, with open face beholding as in a glass the glory of the Lord, are changed into the same image from glory to glory, even as by the Spirit of the Lord.
Again we see here:
Rom 12:2 (KJV) And be not conformed to this world: but be ye transformed by the renewing of your mind, that ye may prove what is that good, and acceptable, and perfect, will of God.
We are promised a change as we pay attention to the Word.
This is entirely different from a habitual sinner. He is not interested in changing or getting better in God.
He may profess interest in change with his mouth, but his heart is far from that.
He or she is not interested in God’s word, he is only religious, and he goes to church.
He is a serial fornicator. He plays sports with sin.
The Bible warns against such people.
Can I Marry An Imperfect Person?
Here are some clear instructions:
1Co 5:9-11 (MSG) I wrote you in my earlier letter that you shouldn’t make yourselves at home among the sexually promiscuous. [10] I didn’t mean that you should have nothing at all to do with outsiders of that sort. Or with crooks, whether blue- or white-collar. Or with spiritual phonies, for that matter. You’d have to leave the world entirely to do that! [11] But I am saying that you shouldn’t act as if everything is just fine when one of your Christian companions is promiscuous or crooked, is flip with God or rude to friends, gets drunk or becomes greedy and predatory. You can’t just go along with this, treating it as acceptable behavior.
You are not to be friends with such people and not to talk about getting married to such because of perceived benefits.
I will continue where I stopped two days ago. Previously, I wrote about the fact that God gave every woman the ability and capacity to be a builder.
Our text in Proverbs 14:1 KJ V says,
“Every wise woman buildeth her house: but the foolish plucketh it down with her hands’.
We also talked about how we need to build according to the pattern.
Ex 25:40 And look that thou make them after their pattern, which was shewed thee in the mount.
God is the architect, He gives us the blueprint of what we should build, the material to use in building, and how we should build. It is building according to the pattern that makes us wise women who build our homes.
Today, we will be looking at how we should build our homes and families.
1. We should build with prayers
Jud 1:20-But ye, beloved, building up yourselves on your most holy faith, praying in the Holy Ghost,
Our homes and families have different aspects just like any building has different sections and areas like the sitting room, the bathroom, the bedroom, the kitchen etc. Each of these different component of the building have different functionalities and you cannot replace them with each other. In the same way, the different aspects of our homes and families need to be built up through prayers.
You must build every aspect of your home, marriage, and family with prayers. As a woman, you are not permitted to joke with prayers. Pray for each child. In fact, praying for them starts from conception. And the best way to pray for your children is in tongues as the Holy Spirit grants you utterance. You pray for and about your spouse and every detail of his life. It is an assignment. Your husband’s success should be your prayer burden. Pray for yourself because you are also part of that building. It is full-time work. There are so many aspects of your home and marriage that you build up through prayers.
2. We should build with the Word
Luk 6:47 Whosoever cometh to me, and heareth my sayings, and doeth them, I will shew you to whom he is like:
Luk 6:48 He is like a man which built an house, and digged deep, and laid the foundation on a rock: and when the flood arose, the stream beat vehemently upon that house, and could not shake it: for it was founded upon a rock.
The word of God is our only guarantee of a strong and solid foundation for our homes, marriage, and families. The infallible word of God is what ensures that what we are building stands the test of time and can weather the storms of life. So that whatever beats against our family and marriage, we will still be standing.
When we take time to build intentionally with fervent and continuous prayers and the Word of God we are wise. Don’t let us be like the foolish builder in Luke 6:49. Let’s learn to build according to the pattern God has shown us.
It is my prayer that we will be wise indeed and that the Lord will give us strength and Grace to carry on His mandate for our lives as women.
When You’re Ready for Marriage. Let’s take a look at some hints that show you are really ready for marriage.
1. You are not lonely.
This is because marriage is never the solution for loneliness. You can be married and be lonely! Ask some married folk. You are not ready for marriage if you are lonely. Adam was not lonely; he was alone. Loneliness and being alone are not the same thing.
Marriage is never meant to alleviate loneliness; rather, it is meant to supplement and provide companionship.
If you look up the word “helper,” you’ll see what I mean.
Genesis 2:18 (KJV) And the LORD God said, It is not good that the man should be alone; I will make him an help meet for him.
The Amplified Bible calls it a helper and then expands on that word.
Genesis 2:18 (AMPC) Now the Lord God said, It is not good (sufficient, satisfactory) that the man should be alone; I will make him a helper (suitable, adapted, complementary) for him.
When You’re Ready for Marriage
2. You are not looking for house help.
A woman is to be a helper rather than a house help The definitions have been established. They are not the same thing.
Depending on the circumstances, she can do the laundry, but she is not a dry cleaner or washing machine.
She hasn’t come to work her hands to the bone while her husband watches the news and football.
This is especially crucial now since there are so many career women.
If the young couple does not have housekeepers or anyone else to assist them, they must both face the labor and not delegate it to one side. This is what real love is!
This does not diminish the wife’s hard work and industriousness, as demonstrated by the virtuous woman, but it also does not render the husband superfluous in the home.
There should be “labor division” in love!
hen You’re Ready for Marriage
And this is why single should not spend weekends with boyfriends in order to secure a wedding.
That is not how it works.
You’ll have more sex (which is sinful) )and less meaningful conversations to develop your marital aspirations.
The time that should be spent getting to know each other and examining character flaws is instead spent wrapped up in each other’s embrace, in passionate sex, which is why difficulties arise after the wedding.
You never got to know that person with you on the bed.
Life as a married couple is extremely demanding and requires a lot of wisdom.
There are many areas you should focus on as couples. This morning, I will be identifying just a few of these areas as we all make up our minds to work on our marriages. Singles should learn from this too as a preparation for their wedding.
Pay attention to these details, and your marriage will flourish.
Focus On These Areas In Marriage
1. You should never make your partner feel threatened.
Marriage is a collaboration, not a boss-bondmaid relationship. Nobody is better or worse than anyone else.
Learn to value one another as human beings first. The husband is the head of the household, but it does not make him superior.
The wife is to submit but that does not mean she should be muted and silenced in the home.
Husbands must come into that place of maturity to give wings to their wives to fly while wives must learn to be a help meet indeed by fully submitting to their wives and respecting them.
Focus On These Areas In Marriage
2. Never allow for adultery or infidelity.
It is never worth it, no matter how much you are tempted. Adultery will always be regarded as a dumb sin.
Extramarital affairs are frequently extremely expensive. Nothing compares to the cost of shattered trust.
Stay together and eliminate every emotional interference.
3. Never deny each other.
Don’t deprive your spouse of the enjoyment God intended for sex in marriage. Try various styles. Proper hygiene is also essential.
On the other hand, singles are to keep their bodies under and not indulge in sexual compromise.
The biblical instruction remains the same, sex should be kept till after the wedding! God is not about to change that injunction!
Focus On These Areas In Marriage
4. Maintaining secrets in a marriage is a dead end.
It is likely that you withhold certain sensitive subjects from your spouse for a better time. But no secrets, please. Be open and be transparent with one another. Whatever is covered never heals, and moreover, if your partner had to discover themselves, the trust would have been broken.
If this has happened once, forgive and move on but learn from it!
