Uncovering Four Damaging Character Flaws

Uncovering Four Damaging Character Flaws

Reading Time: 2 minutes

Uncovering Four Damaging Character Flaws

Character flaws are not death sentences but defects that we should be willing to change. Change doesn’t come easy. However, to grow we all need to change. The only constant thing is change.  No one is born with the perfect set of characters, we all learn and cultivate them.

Many character flaws are destructive in relationships and marriage. It is essential to talk about them because once we are in love, we may not realize or pay attention to the signs that character flaws are present in your fiance or fiancee. 

Here are four character flaws

1. Pride

Once married you and your spouse are joined together as one and you don’t want to be destroyed along with your spouse. Pride goes before a fall.  You will notice pride when your partner has an over-inflated ego, doesn’t listen to correction, thinks he knows it all, and feels they are always the boss.  Humility is a virtue and it can be learned. Satan was proud and that was why he was cast down. So if you notice even the slightest trace of pride begin to do something about it. Often the person with the flaw may be ignorant of it.

Job 36:9 (MSG) God tells them where they’ve gone wrong, shows them how their pride has caused their trouble.

2. Insincerity

This is a character flaw that may have been learned from childhood as a coping mechanism. Some use it as a defense mechanism. It is not being truthful. The Bible recommends that our Yea be Yea and our Nay be Nay.  When your partner has problems with being sincere you need to pay attention to this character flaw.

3. Laziness 

A lazy person is the devil’s workshop. One of the virtues one should look for in a partner is hard work. Not just working hard but also working smart. If you learn to work hard, you will learn to cultivate your garden and grow your barren land turning it into a green pasture. There is dignity in labor while a lazy partner will always find fault with his tools. Fulfilling our destiny requires some level of tenacity and hard work. If you notice your partner is lazy, please pay attention to this character flaw.

Pro 15:19 (MSG) The path of lazy people is overgrown with briers; the diligent walk down a smooth road.

4. Greed

This is another character flaw that will eventually lead to destruction.  Yes, one should have the drive to want more in life, but greed happens when there is an insatiable and burning desire for more material things. This is what we call the mundane things. Anyone chasing the mundane things cannot be a God chaser and a chaser of His kingdom. A greedy person will chase shadows at the expense of the real things. A greedy person will neglect his family all in the name of making more money. 

Pay close attention to these character defects to avoid stories that touch the heart.

Be blessed.




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The Grandeur of Loving Her

The Grandeur of Loving Her

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The Grandeur of Loving Her

How should a person love their fiancee or spouse? That is what I will be looking at this morning. Love is an action word and if there are no actions to show you love her, you don’t love her in the real sense. Just like respect is a big deal for the guys and it is God’s order that their fiancee and wife respect them out of honor to God and not necessarily because he deserves it.

The same way, God expects and requires that every man loves his own fiancee.

One of the marks of maturity is when a man has the ability to overlook the weakness of his fiancee and despite all, still love her unconditionally.

Eph 5:25 (MSG)

Husbands, go all out in your love for your wives, exactly as Christ did for the church–a love marked by giving, not getting.

As husbands-to-be, you are to model Christ. Your leadership role is that of a servant leader. Your headship over her is not an authoritarian rule but one marked with sacrificial love.

One that is patient and kind. One that is meant to nurture and bring out the best in her.

Loving your fiancee begins from the time of your courtship and not when you are married. You start walking by the principle of genuine, God kind of love. This love definitely does not include sleeping with her or dishonoring her body. Any guy who sleeps with a lady before marrying her has shown the highest level of dishonor for the lady. That definitely is not love.

I do not condemn any body because most of these things were done in ignorance. But repentance is needed especially now that you know. Not engaging in pre-maritals is the honor you give to God that the marriage institution is ordained by God.

You are to love her like your own body because she actually is. You begin to learn to treat your fiancee as you would treat yourself. Treat her with dignity, don’t shout on her. Don’t shut her up. Don’t ignore her or her opinions. Don’t compare her to other ladies, don’t put attention on her weak areas.

Learn to celebrate her, appreciate her and hold her in high esteem.

Loving her is every man’s God given assignment. Don’t fail in this assignment.

God bless you.




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Statements That Show You Are Not Loved Part 2 

Statements That Show You Are Not Loved Part 2 

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Statements That Show You Are Not Loved Part 2 

We started on this yesterday! We will continue this morning!

3. Out of all my girlfriends, you are the best

This is often a logical way to manipulate the emotions of the lady. As a lady, I don’t know what you are doing with someone who tells you out-rightly that you are not the only one he is seeing. 

Are you encouraging adultery after marriage and giving him the go-ahead? Men don’t change after marriage! When a man has the guts to tell you that he has several ladies as lovers including you, then as a lady you should have the guts to walk away from such affliction!

4. We don’t have to tell anybody about this relationship

When a guy begins to make this statement, your antenna should go up! Something is defective right there. There are no commitments when he hides the relationship from friends and family. 

There may be occasions when the parents are not interested in marriage and it is wise to keep quiet for some time, but at least, he should be willing to notify his pastor. What if he doesn’t have a pastor? The answer to that is another question. What are you doing with such a person?

5. I am just managing you and you should thank your stars

When a guy doesn’t love you, he will verbalize it one day, one way or the other. If you are sensitive, you can pick it up from his words. When a guy says he is just managing you, that sounds like wickedness to me. 

Probably the lady in question has a self-esteem issue, but as a lady, you don’t have any business with anybody who doesn’t value you or appreciate you as a person. After marriage, you don’t want to be treated as a doormat, you want to be valued as a help.




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Tender Loving Care For Couples

Tender Loving Care For Couples

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Tender Loving Care For Couples

You know, when I read Ephesians 4:32, it got me thinking about something really important for couples. 

Eph 4:32 (KJV)  
And be ye kind one to another, tenderhearted, forgiving one another, even as God for Christ’s sake hath forgiven you.

The verse suggests three key things: being kind to one another, having a tender heart, and forgiving each other. I think these are super crucial in marriage and can help iron out a lot of issues, you know?

Imagine having a kind and gentle partner – it’s like having a shield against unnecessary arguments. And being tender-hearted? It’s all about treating each other with the same love and care a mom gives her newborn. What if we could be that tender in our relationships? I bet there would be less yelling and definitely no hurtful words thrown around.

Then, there’s the part about forgiving one another. This one’s powerful. Holding onto bitterness can be toxic, so why not just forgive quickly and completely? I like how The Message translation puts it: “Be gentle with one another, sensitive, and forgive as quickly and thoroughly as God forgave you.”

Taking on this attitude of compassion, understanding, and love can change the game. It can put a stop to shouting matches, violent tendencies, and all the negative stuff. I hope that this understanding and love will seep into your marriage and overcome any challenges that come your way.

I wish you all the best and pray that every obstacle in your marriage gets crushed. Here’s to a blessed and loving marriage journey!




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Respect As Singles and Couples

Respect As Singles and Couples

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Respect As Singles and Couples

Let’s dive into the respect pool, especially regarding our men. Like, seriously, why is respect such a big deal for them? 

It’s not about whether your guy is a superhero or not. It’s more about God’s grand plan – respect and honor are the secret sauce to keeping the relationship vibe alive.

Living life by God’s rules is like sticking to a recipe. No arguing, no adding your secret spices – just follow the script. And guess what? Your opinion doesn’t get a starring role. It’s all about playing by God’s rules.

Now, for all you single ladies out there, respect isn’t just a married folks’ thing. It starts way back in courtship. If you’re dissing your dude-to-be now, turning into a respect queen will be difficult after tying the knot.

And hey, respect and submission are not forced on anyone. The Bible’s like, “Respect and submit to your hubby.” Simple, right? So if a guy is not who you can respect, honor, and admire to the point of submitting to him, DON’T marry him.

Marriage is like a legal pact, and breaking it is a big no-no. So, if you’ve decided to say “I do,” it’s like signing a respect contract.  

All attention is placed on the head because that is where the seat of decision, thinking, sight, speech, smell, hearing, and eating is. All vital action takes place in and on the head. Beauty and radiance, intellect, and reasoning are all found on the head.

Yes, the body is very important too. But by design, the head gets the full attention and responsibility rises and falls on the head. The lady or wife is equally important.

Let’s say she is the heart. We know there is no life apart from the heart. The head honors the heart because of its life-giving ability. But the heart is secured and protected because of its makeup and vulnerability.

That is God’s design. And it makes a whole lot of sense, both logical and spiritual sense. 

Respect is:

a feeling of deep admiration for someone or something elicited by their abilities, qualities, or achievements.

admire (someone or something) deeply, as a result of their abilities, qualities, or achievements.

To help you learn respect go through the definition and synonyms of respect and note where you are lacking.

Synonyms: esteem, admire, think highly of, have a high opinion of, hold in high regard, hold in (high) esteem, think much of, approve of, appreciate, cherish, value, set (great) store by, prize, treasure, look up to, pay homage to, venerate, revere, reverence, adulate, worship, idolize, put on a pedestal, lionize, hero-worship, honor, applaud, praise, favor

Eph 5:22 -24
Wives, submit yourselves unto your own husbands, as unto the Lord.
For the husband is the head of the wife, even as Christ is the head of the church: and he is the saviour of the body.
Therefore as the church is subject unto Christ, so [let] the wives [be] to their husbands in everything.

Stay cool and keep the respect vibes rolling!




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