First of all, there is a difference between one’s love language being “gifts” and when one is just being covetous or greedy.
If your fiancé/fiancée/spouse’s love language is gifts, what it means is that until you start appreciating him or her with gifts in a consistent manner, he or she will not feel loved.
How do you know if someone is not just being greedy?
1. Do or Die?
He will not always demand gifts in a do-or-die manner.
2. Love Gives
When you are in a relationship, and no gifts are forthcoming, there may be an issue there because love gives.
What if he or she has no money or has no job? As I said, a gift is a gift and it doesn’t have to be expensive. Writing her a poem is a gift!
Buying him one tiny little chocolate is a gift! What is important is not the gift itself, it is the gesture that brings assurance of being loved and cared for.
When you are able to give gifts in the midst of not too much provision, you will also be able to do so when you eventually have more income.
Your giving spirit is more of an attitude than spending power.
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3. Love is patient
He will not back out just because gifts are not forthcoming. She will not break the relationship because you are not financially buoyant.
4. He will not just be a receiver
He will not just be demanding while he folds his arms and never gives back. Love gives.
5. Giving Back
He will give away gifts too because that is the language he understands and that is what he craves. She would want to give back gifts as well.
6. Gift is not Payment
When a lady gives out her body for money, that is not about love language because what she gets is no longer ‘gifts’ it has become an illegal payment for services rendered and that is not God’s order.
7. Conclusion
In conclusion, and in expressing this language, let God’s word guide you and keep you within godly boundaries.
Don’t borrow to give gifts. Don’t take a loan just to impress someone. Don’t start what you cannot sustain. Don’t spend the money you don’t have to buy things that are not needed in order to impress people that are not looking.
May God grant more understanding!
CONFESSION FOR THE DAY I am not greedy.
PRAYER FOR THE DAY Lord, help me to love correctly.
THOUGHT FOR THE DAY Joh 3:16 For God so loved the world, that he gave his only begotten son, that whosoever believes, should not perish, but have everlasting life.
My children are responsible is our focus today. I remember when I was little and my mother gave me some money to buy fish from the market. When I got to the woman selling the fish, I couldn’t find the money I was given.
Guess what happened when I got home? My mother was angry and scolded me for losing the money.
Why do you think my mother was angry? Was she right to be angry? The answer is “yes”.
It was my responsibility to keep the money well. It was in my possession and I should have kept it well. I was trusted to keep it safe and get what I was sent.
Responsibility means doing what is expected of you and accepting the consequences for either doing or not doing these things.
This means that as a child, there are things you are meant to do, say or keep. Things you will be responsible for. And as you grow older these things increase in size and time.
“…Each person should judge his own actions. Then he can be proud for what he himself has done. Each person must be responsible for himself.”
Gal. 6:5 ICB
The bible verse above says that you are to judge your own actions, check if you are proud of what you do and that you should be responsible for yourself.
In other words, are you proud that you are responsible or not? Judge yourself.
May the Lord give you enlightenment about being responsible. Amen.
Prayer: Lord Jesus, I open my heart as I learn about responsibility. Help me to keep my heart open. Amen.
Action point: Ask your parents what your responsibilities are if you don’t know them. If you do, as the bible verse said, are you proud of your actions?
We know money is a major part of our lives as married couples. In fact, we make about 70% of our decision based on finances.
The house we live in, the area we stay, how many kids we have, what school they go, the type of clothes they wear, the type of food they eat, how comfortable the house we live in is, do we rent an apartment or buy one, what work we do, where we work, what part of the country we live in, what type of friends we have, the type of car(s) we have, what church we attend, our spiritual level…and it goes on and on.
Money is so important that it appears in the Bible 123 times.
The only thing that can compete with God in our hearts is mammon or finances. Every sin of covetousness especially of material things is traceable to Financial issues.
Did you miss out on yesterday’s devotional, we’ve got you covered kindly go HERE. For KHC video Devotionals kindly go HERE
Most adulteries and fornications are basically traceable to money. For example, a beautiful lady or handsome guy who you get attracted to is attractive because she/he can afford expensive things that make her/him beautiful.
No one is attracted to an ugly and poor fellow.
Money is a defence. It can defend our spouse and marriage from falling if properly used
For wisdom is a defence, and money is a defence: but the excellency of knowledge is, that wisdom giveth life to them that have it.
Ecc 7:12 [KJV]
So, as couples, it is important we talk about finances and guard against its adverse effect on our marriage. We can make money serve us at whatever level we are in. Finances will answer and solve the majority of our marital problems.
A feast is made for laughter, and wine maketh merry: but money answereth all things.
Ecc 10:19 [KJV]
Tomorrow, I will show you some pertinent areas to discuss the issue of money with your spouse.
God bless your marriage.
CONFESSION FOR THE DAY We have money. Money doesn’t have us. We are rich.
PRAYER FOR THE DAY Lord, give us the wisdom to know how to multiply whatever amount of money we have in Jesus name.
THOUGHT FOR THE DAY Ecc 10:19 A feast is made for laughter, and wine maketh merry: but money answereth all things
ACTION PLAN FOR THE DAY Discuss the points with your spouse
In marriage, it is our money! Marriage fuses two individuals together, and they are no longer two but one!
Wherefore they are no more twain, but one flesh. What therefore God hath joined together, let not man put asunder.
Mat 19:6 (KJV)
The Passion Translation puts it this way:
From then on, they are no longer two, but united as one. So what God unites let no one divide!”
Mat 19:6 (TPT)
There is nothing like “My money!”
Marriage wedges two destinies together, wherein you are naked and not ashamed.
In marriage covenant as ordained by God, there should be no secrets, no coded businesses or relationships, no hidden agendas, no side relationships, and so on.
Life has to be lived like an open book, the moment there are things you shield from your spouse, some form of compromise is already knocking.
As husband and wife, decide jointly on how money should be budgeted and administered.
This agreement means you are not putting your spouse in the dark as regards financial matters. There should be proper communications and involvement in all financial decisions. This will create a sense of belonging and it will be difficult for the devil to bring in assumptions and create confusion for the family.
You see, assumptions are the lowest forms of knowledge. They are mostly wrong. You need then to ensure there is proper communication so as not to render your spouse vulnerable to assumptions.
Don’t yield to that suggestion from the devil to hide any information as regards money to your spouse. Each time your spouse discovers you are hiding from him, trust will be broken and once trust is broken, it impacts a lot on the marriage.
I pray God will grant your more understanding.
Good morning!
CONFESSION FOR THE DAY I cooperate with my spouse to move our marriage forward.
PRAYER FOR THE DAY Pray against the works of the devil in your family.
THOUGHT FOR THE DAY Mat 19:6 (KJV)Wherefore they are no more twain, but one flesh. What therefore God hath joined together, let not man put asunder.
One of the greatest challenges that a man will face is how to care of his wife. This is not because a man is reluctant to do so, but simply because the definition of care in a man’s brain is sometimes exact opposite of how a lady defines care. I am not talking about when you’ve just fallen in love. Mostly at that time, your eyes are not open to reality then. At the times when you’ve just fallen in love, everything he does is okay and everything she does is okay!
A woman sees C-A-R-E as availability, attention and some good money! A man often sees C-A-R-E as money, money and money, and that is where the problem is?
Didn’t I just send you money? How can you say I don’t care? Didn’t I just send you to Dubai? You see, a woman that truly loves you doesn’t mind going to Dubai, but she doesn’t want to go alone! She wants to go with you!
I know there are some women who see C-A-R-E as money, money and money! This isn’t a genuine love, and at the end of the day, they are still frustrated despite the money because the real need is never met!
This is the bane of ladies who are of marriageable age, but refuse to love and be loved appropriately because of some man who is giving them money or who rents an apartment for them somewhere.
You call them big girls, but they are really small inside! The big girls are not the ones spending some ill-gotten money that they accumulated from using their bodies as a commodity; the big girls are the ones who refuse to compromise in the face of provocation, who decides to stand up for God!
If you are engaged to a lady who never asks for your time and attention but only wants you to send her money, you should really be worried! She is probably getting the emotional fulfillment somewhere else and you are just a tool in her hands, to get money!
On the other hand, if a lady never stresses you for money but only asks that you call regularly and be there for her, she really loves you! Though, there could be an extreme of this as well, when the lady in question is overly needy because of past experiences and self-esteem issues.
So how do you take care of lady? Be there for her. Take care of her by spending time with her. But, I have to provide for her, so I am busy and I have to be away! Yes, but you have to create time out of no time, to be available for her. May you not get the money and then lose her!
You need to understand that it is a need of hers! Initially she might not complain because the money is always there, but after a while, she would rather let you have her than the money having her.
Why do you think some rich women get depressed? Haven’t you seen ladies living in palatial mansions who are so unhappy and depressed?
Money answereth all things…that it can answer!
Like it is often said, can money buy sleep? Nay, it may buy waterbed, not sleep!
Can money buy a good heart, nay, it may get a beautiful face, not necessarily a good heart. One of the worst things that can happen to a man is a stunningly beautiful face sitting on an evil heart! Conversely, one of the greatest tragedies that can happen to a woman is a stupendously rich man and a handsome face sitting on an abusive, egocentric and violent man!
His money buys your body, your mouth and your mind! You can’t even think for yourself, that is not marriage! Sadly this is where a lot of ladies find themselves! A lady called me sometimes ago weeping profusely; that she has all the money but she cannot spend! She was living in a prison!
It is for this reason that when you are talking of a relationship or marriage with a person, the most singular important factor is God’s choice for you!
And then some people will come up with some funny ideas like; what if God gives me somebody I don’t love? What you don’t know is that God is not man, that arithmetic or geometry will never be.
That God will lead you to somebody you hate all your life? It never happens like that! You will always love what God offers because He gives you the best! Yes, initially you may not cooperate with God’s plan because of selfishness and greed, but when you come to embrace God’s plan, you will see the wisdom of God, and you will be full of praises to God!
Only God knows the man or woman that will last the whole journey with you. Only God knows the one that will pack his or her load along the way. Only God knows the one that might pull the trigger on you five years later. Only God knows the one that wouldn’t mind using you for some ritual… because God looks into the heart…while you are looking at the bank account and the face! You see why it is important you follow God’s direction?
What if you are already married and you feel you made a mistake? Stay there and correct that mistake, with prayers, good attitudes, wisdom and a lot of maturity, God can heal your marriage and make it good!
May God help us all!
CONFESSION FOR THE DAY I am not confused. I am being led of God
PRAYER FOR THE DAY Lord lead me into that place by your side.
THOUGHT FOR THE DAY My voice shalt thou hear in the morning, O Lord; in the morning will I direct my prayer unto thee, and will look up. (Psalms 5:3 KJV)