We know money is a major part of our lives as married couples. In fact, we make about 70% of our decision based on finances.
The house we live in, the area we stay, how many kids we have, what school they go, the type of clothes they wear, the type of food they eat, how comfortable the house we live in is, do we rent an apartment or buy one, what work we do, where we work, what part of the country we live in, what type of friends we have, the type of car(s) we have, what church we attend, our spiritual level…and it goes on and on.
Money is so important that it appears in the Bible 123 times.
The only thing that can compete with God in our hearts is mammon or finances. Every sin of covetousness especially of material things is traceable to Financial issues.
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Most adulteries and fornications are basically traceable to money. For example, a beautiful lady or handsome guy who you get attracted to is attractive because she/he can afford expensive things that make her/him beautiful.
No one is attracted to an ugly and poor fellow.
Money is a defence. It can defend our spouse and marriage from falling if properly used
For wisdom is a defence, and money is a defence: but the excellency of knowledge is, that wisdom giveth life to them that have it.
Ecc 7:12 [KJV]
So, as couples, it is important we talk about finances and guard against its adverse effect on our marriage. We can make money serve us at whatever level we are in. Finances will answer and solve the majority of our marital problems.
A feast is made for laughter, and wine maketh merry: but money answereth all things.
Ecc 10:19 [KJV]
Tomorrow, I will show you some pertinent areas to discuss the issue of money with your spouse.
God bless your marriage.
CONFESSION FOR THE DAY We have money. Money doesn’t have us. We are rich.
PRAYER FOR THE DAY Lord, give us the wisdom to know how to multiply whatever amount of money we have in Jesus name.
THOUGHT FOR THE DAY Ecc 10:19 A feast is made for laughter, and wine maketh merry: but money answereth all things
ACTION PLAN FOR THE DAY Discuss the points with your spouse
Therefore shall a man LEAVE his father and his mother, and shall CLEAVE unto his wife: and they shall be one flesh.
Gen 2:24 (KJV)
The word “Leave” means to loosen, relinquish, permit, and forsake It is a total departure. But it is never a disconnection.
The man has to do the leaving. Without leaving, there will never be a successful marriage. All undue interference and control from the parents must be minimized.
The word “Cleave” means cling or adhere; to catch by pursuit: – abide, follow close (hard, after), be joined (together), and pursue hard
Allegiance must shift from parents to your wife. This is what marriage is.
Your wife comes first from the wedding day. Your spouse becomes your priority. Your mum is another man’s wife, not your wife. Your own wife must be your priority.
Cleaving means to catch by pursuit, so you never stop pursuing your wife. You keep at it, even after the wedding. In the pursuit lies the cleaving. The man is to cleave unto HIS OWN wife! An attempt to cleave to another man’s wife will usher in a marital crisis.
It also means to follow close. Be joined and connected to her emotionally and otherwise.
When things seem not to be going right, you don’t quit. This is what it means to cleave. You don’t pack your stuff and start singing songs of divorce when there is a little provocation.
This is what cleaving is. It is just like your relationship with God. You are to cleave unto Him and not try to leave when things seem not to be going your own way. Leaving God and refusing to cleave will complicate issues, and that is the same thing in marriage.
You are to cleave for life! Any attempt to leave is a tearing part that would be painful.
Stay with each other no matter what. Cleaving means that you are dedicated to each other. It means sharing with each other on the deepest level. It means enjoying each other and supplying warmth for yourselves.
Again, if two lie together, then they have heat: but how can one be warm alone?
Ecc 4:11 (KJV)
I pray that God will grant understanding. Your marriage will not suffer a crisis. Your marriage will not lose that godly steam. I pray that God will pour new wine into your marriage and cause the love between you to come alive!
CONFESSION FOR THE DAY I choose to cleave to my spouse only
PRAYER FOR THE DAY Help me to cleave oh Lord.
THOUGHT FOR THE DAY Gen 2:24 [MSG]Therefore a man leaves his father and mother and embraces his wife. They become one flesh.
1. Don’t ignore her needs When you ignore the most importantneeds of your wife over and over again, she is going to get hurt and eventually feel that you never loved her.
This feeling can degenerate to a point where she comes up with an emotional defense, and the peak of that is closing her spirit.
You see, in loving your wife, you have to do so in God’s term and her own terms and not in your own terms. This is basically because the needs of a man are miles apart from that of a woman.
So, in meeting her needs, it is often easy to interpret her needs based on your own, but it is not often so. Priorities are at variance, especially at emotional levels.
Let her communicate her needs to you, you will be amazed that what is important to her is non-issue to you!
And so, the challenge is to focus on what is insignificant to you but is a big issue for her. That is selflessness!
Her greatest needs are always towards attention and quality time!
2. Don’t make her feel stupid and dumb When you are always insinuating that your wife is dumb and stupid, she will get hurt.
Sometimes you don’t say it, but it shows in your body language and the way you dismiss whatever she tries to suggest.
Sometimes, a husband doesn’t even want to hear her opinion. She is to be seen and not heard. That is never the plan of God for marriage. The reality is that she is your helper. Her “dumb” or “stupid” suggestions would have saved you a lot only if you had listen.
You see, she may not be logical, but she is intuitive.
You know the man you want to go into business partnership with because he has all it takes, but she will tell you by reason of intuition that the man will mess things up. She has no evidence, not precedence, but she has intuition!
Don’t ignore that intuition!
CONFESSION FOR THE DAY I love my spouse on God’s terms and theirs.
PRAYER FOR THE DAY Pray that God will teach you how to love your spouse.
THOUGHT FOR THE DAY 1 Cor 13:7 [CEV] Love is always supportive, loyal, hopeful, and trusting.
ACTION PLAN FOR THE DAY Carry out the above tests on your potential partner
The fact is that there are no perfect persons and we are all projects in the hands of God. However, there are basic traits to watch out for generally. While you may not be able to find a person that successfully combines all these, the qualities should guide you in your decision.
If a person does not have character defects and does not live in habitual sin, some of these qualities can be improved upon by asking God for His grace.
1. The test of integrity. Test him for faithfulness and integrity in little and big things. Make sure she has integrity and her words and actions line up. Integrity is very important because that is what will eventually preserve you.
The integrity of the upright shall guide them: but the perverseness of transgressors shall destroy them.
(Pro 11:3 KJV)
God loves integrity. In Job 2:3, God boasted about Job and he mentioned his integrity. Integrity in that verse means ‘innocence’
The potential guy or the lady must have integrity as well. It is a great legacy to pass to the children. Integrity is from the word ‘Integral” meaning one. You are supposed to be the same person within and without.
Don’t marry a gentle saint on Sundays but a vicious man on Mondays. Be careful to not walk with persons of dual personalities who seemed to give their lives to Jesus one moment and then take the lives back the next moment.
How will you know all these? These are the things you will find out when you are friends.
That is why pre-marital sex should be avoided because it will get you confused and distracted. You see, the moment you are illegally bonded together in pre-marital sex, the obvious character defects that others can see will mean nothing to you.
They will ask you questions like, “What are you doing with that kind of person?” And you will be like, ‘leave me alone, I love him, he will change! You see, you have not even changed yourself! You are not the Holy Spirit who changes people! What the scripture says is that that you should not be unequally yoked!
Don’t become partners with those who reject God. How can you make a partnership out of right and wrong? That’s not partnership; that’s war. Is light best friends with dark? Does Christ go strolling with the Devil? Do trust and mistrust hold hands?
(2Co 6:14-15 MSG)
May God grant you more understanding!
CONFESSION FOR THE DAY I have the wisdom of God to walk with the right person
PRAYER FOR THE DAY Pray that the person who will walk you down the aisle will be a person of integrity.
THOUGHT FOR THE DAY Prov 11:3 [AMP]The integrity of the upright shall guide them, but the willful contrariness and crookedness of the treacherous shall destroy them.
ACTION PLAN FOR THE DAY Study the word ‘integrity’.
Every wise woman buildeth her house: but the foolish plucketh it down with her hands.
Pro 14:1 (KJV)
Women are just simply powerful. And that is how God created them. This is why they are also called helpers. And the only other person that was referred to as helper in the entirety of the New Testament is the Holy Spirit.
Every other time, you will hear about the prayers of mothers. Hardly will you hear people talk about the prayers of their fathers. That tells you there is something about women.
Dear wife, there is a lot of power and accompanying responsibilities that lie with you. Your decisions, prayers, and actions will eventually build your home or tear it down, therefore, you cannot afford to be foolish. Be wise and cooperate with what God is trying to do in your life.
How do you do this?
Avoid all the strife, bickering, quarrels, and the like for that is how a foolish woman tears down her home. Avoid emotional affairs. They are distractions.
Now, since it is the woman building the house, what then is the responsibility of the man?
Build the woman!
That is what the man should do. Build the woman.
Dear men, build your wife so that your wife can build the house.
Invest in your wife. Support her endeavors and career. Be interested in her passion and you know what, she will give it all it takes to pray for the family.
May your marriage be blessed.
CONFESSION FOR TODAY I chose to honor my spouse.
PRAYER FOR TODAY Pray for your wife.
THOUGHT FOR TODAY Pro 14:1 (KJV)Every wise woman buildeth her house: but the foolish plucketh it down with her hands.
