How To Make Progress In Your Marriage. Your past is your past because it happened in your ‘yesterday’. That yesterday could be 20 years, 30 days, 12 years and it could be a day ago. It becomes our past the moment we consciously put it behind us.
The past before our marriage too has to be dealt with in this manner. These include past relationships, past habits, those friends you used to have late night hang out with. Any thing that you know will be detrimental to your new status as a married man or woman.
The pains, hurts, challenges, shortcomings and weights of yesterday must be laid at the feet of the cross of Jesus. If we must experience the marriage that God has in mind for us.
Some people are holding so many people in unforgiveness. Some wives are holding so many people in their minds. Even people who they have no business holding in unforgiveness. Some are unfruitful because of holding unto the past.
In your marriage, you have to let the past go. The past is too heavy a weight to carry with your today. Your spouse will offend you not on purpose most of the time. But the onus is on you to let go of the past.
We must learn to embrace the truth of how to let go of the past like the prodigal son did.
And when he came to himself, he said, How many hired servants of my father’s have bread enough and to spare, and I perish with hunger! – Luk 15:17
The Bible says, he came to himself. We must come to ourselves every now and then about our past hurts and offense.
And he arose, and came to his father. But when he was yet a great way off, his father saw him, and had compassion, and ran, and fell on his neck, and kissed him. – Luk 15:20
He arose, he took step in dealing with his past. He didn’t leave it as an intent, he did something, he took action.
Until you take action to deal with your past, don’t expect God to grant you the freedom He has in store for only those who let go of the past.
But the father said to his servants, Bring forth the best robe, and put it on him; and put a ring on his hand, and shoes on his feet: – Luk 15:22
May God help us to let go of our past in Jesus name.
CONFESSION FOR THE DAY My past does not slow me down
PRAYERS FOR THE DAY Oh Lord, heal me from my past
THOUGHT FOR THE DAY Marriage is honourable in all, and the bed undefiled: but whoremongers and adulterers God will judge. – Heb 13:4 (KJV)
ACTION PLAN FOR THE DAY Put the above points to use.
Sin is the barrier that disrupts you from accessing God’s throne and His presence as you should. It is that one thing that blocks you from being with your heavenly Father.
In the old testament, the bible records that the temple had a place called the Holy of Holies where there was a veil covering it.
“…The veil shall separate for you the Holy place and the Holy of Holies” – Exo. 26:33
But only the high priest could enter after he had undergone some cleansing rituals.
“But only the high priest could go into the second room, and he did that only once a year. He could never enter the inner room without taking blood with him. He offered that blood to God for himself and for the people’s sins…” ICB. – Heb.9:7
The God we serve hates sins totally and needs us to be pure before we can come before Him.
After sinning, the enemy suggests to a person that God can never forgive, thereby encouraging them to run away from God. This is where shame comes in.
If you allow the enemy to tell you that your shortcomings are so huge or terrible and that God can never forgive you, then you don’t know your God.
Your God is more than able to forgive your sins.
He wants nothing more than to forgive you so that the two of you can be in a loving relationship constantly.
Your heavenly father wants to forgive you so that He can bless you.
He will always forgive you but asks that you don’t allow yourself to become a slave to sin.
Never allow the enemy or anyone to tell you that God can’t ever forgive you. He gave Jesus for you. Jesus that was sinless to die for your sins that you may be called His son or daughter.
Prayer point: Dear Lord Jesus, thank you for granting me access to the Holy of Holies. I am glad that God will always forgive my sins. Sin will not overcome me. I will not hide in shame. Amen.
Action Plan: Stay away from all forms of sin
Declaration: God will forgive me of my sins. I will not hide in shame.
Now as you read this, I really want you to check yourself out. Are you holding a few people in your heart without forgiving them? Well, it could slow you down!
It could cause delays in marriages, it could cause relationships not to work out, and other havocs can be wrecked.
That’s why I tell people; don’t start another relationship immediately after one has just ended. Give yourself a break, at least, six months.
Why?
When you rush into another relationship with hurts, wounds, bitterness, and an unforgiving spirit, you will end up frustrating that other person and the relationship will still not work out. You cannot establish a relationship on a foundation of hurts, wounds, and bitterness!
When you stay in unforgiving mode, it’s like moving away from God’s protective arm into the terrain of the devil. A lot of us fast and pray fervently, but hear me and hear me well, if you don’t forgive, you will never be able to enjoy the fullness of God’s blessings.
I come to you this morning, by the Spirit of God and by His grace which He has endowed me with and I speak into your life and destiny, ‘Forgive!’
Yes, I know you are hurt! Yes, I know you were jilted. Yes, I know you were raped. Yes, I know you were defrauded. Yes, I know you were abandoned when it is just a few days to the wedding. Yes, I know there has been a divorce. Yes, I know you were cheated. Yes, I know you were wrongfully accused. Yes, I know your spouse cheated on you and manipulated you…and the list goes on.
But you cannot afford some bitterness. It is too expensive for you! You need God now, don’t you?
You yourself are not perfect, are you?
The only way God can overlook, forgive and forget your own imperfections and cause His mercy to avail for you is when you forgive that person.
CONFESSION FOR THE DAY I choose to forgive all who have hurt me
PRAYER FOR THE DAY Ask for the grace to forgive all who have hurt you
THOUGHT FOR THE DAY Beloved, never avenge yourselves, but leave it to the wrath of God, for it is written, “Vengeance is mine, I will repay, says the Lord.” (Romans 12:19 ESV)
We started this instructive devotional yesterday. If we will be successful, get it right and gain speed in 2022, we need to take these points seriously.
Not striving to be super couples only slows us down. We move in circles and we achieve very little. Whereas, God’s intention for us is to multiply grace and do ten times our normal capacity.
We looked at the following yesterday:
1. Worship 2. Understand your spouse 3. Excellence
Today, we will continue from where we stopped.
4. Forgiveness
If you can’t forgive, don’t bother getting married. Forgiving in marriage is a compulsory course. You only slow yourselves down if you find it difficult to forgive.
Some couples hold their spouse and refuse to forgive because they feel their spouse doesn’t deserve the luxury of their forgiveness. They want to hold on to wrong because they feel they are punishing their spouse.
How humorous that is. I have always said it. Not forgiving is like taking poison and expecting the other person to die. You cannot afford it.
Be like a duck that water doesn’t stay on its back. Let nonforgiveness fall off your back like a duck.
Deal with every form of hurt, malice, bitterness, strife et cetera. These are Satan’s most common arsenal.
Forgive because God says to forgive and trust God to reward you.
And his lord was wroth, and delivered him to the tormentors, till he should pay all that was due unto him. So likewise shall my heavenly Father do also unto you, if ye from your hearts forgive not every one his brother their trespasses. – Mat 18:34-35
Did you miss out on yesterday’s devotional, we’ve got you covered kindly go HERE. For KHC video Devotionals kindly go HERE
5. Fun
Be fun-loving. Don’t be too serious. Have a child-like approach to life and cast all your care upon the Lord once and for all.
Casting your care is like throwing your care on God. Don’t pick it back, drop them and leave them with the Double-breasted one.
Laugh, make jest of yourselves, play like clowns, behave like little children, pull your husband beards, do funny faces, and so on. Be creative with fun. By all means, play.
I know you are busy, but out of no time, create time. If you were told if you don’t play, you will not live past 2 months, you will take playing seriously.
It takes away the boredom and monotony out of your marriage. It even helps you to forgive better. If you have to pray for God to make you playful, do. Some of us are not naturally playful. We need the Holy Spirit’s help.
Fun in marriage is not complete without doses of intercourse. Let it be regular, spontaneous, creative, and pleasurable.
6. Be the best
This is simply being your spouse’s best friend. Remember when you were younger, how you did with your best friend. Bring the same into your marriage.
Cherish your time with your spouse. Talk about everything with the exception of nothing. Talk, talk, talk, and listen, listen and listen. Be concerned and truly care from your heart.
Think of ways to outdo yourself in being kind.
Being the best spouse to your own husband or wife entails looking into your marriage and finding out the ingredients that are missing.
Remember, you cannot change your spouse. Love your spouse without trying to make him/her conform to your own standard. Who told you your standard is the best?
Best friends never attempt to change one another. At best, they seek to lovingly influence the other person.
Do the above things, and you will be on your way to becoming a super couple. It is the doer that God promises to be blessed in his ways. Don’t just read, be a doer.
God bless your marriage.
CONFESSION FOR THE DAY I get it right in my marriage.
PRAYER FOR THE DAY Pray for the spirit of excellence
THOUGHT FOR THE DAY Mat 6:33 [KJV] But seek ye first the kingdom of God, and his righteousness; and all these things shall be added unto you.
