God’s Method for a Stronger Marriage. Single or Married, God has a method He has instituted to save you from unnecessary embarrassments and heartaches in your marital journey. He has a “deliverance” package for us, before the problem showed up!
Well, if He didn’t do that, He would have been an insensitive God, since this area is in major focus at certain seasons of our lives.
As a matter of fact, in the scripture, He actually used the word “deliver!”
Take a look at them:
For the woman:
Proverbs 2:12 (KJV) To DELIVER thee from the way of the evil man, from the man that speaketh froward things;
For the man:
Proverbs 2:16 (KJV) To DELIVER thee from the strange woman, even from the stranger which flattereth with her words;
God’s Method for a Stronger Marriage
Here is the provisioning system for your deliverance and protection when it comes to emotional decisions and marital conclusions.
In other words, if you follow the instructions here, you will not enter “one chance!”
What are these things that will “deliver” you?
It mentioned three things:
a. Wisdom b. Discretion c. Understanding
It all still boils down to one thing we have been emphasizing in these devotionals for years!
Spend time with God and His word before making decisions.
That is where you get wisdom, discretion, and understanding!
God’s Method for a Stronger Marriage
For those who are already married, this is also what will get you out of any storm or issue you are going through!
His word is powerful. His word is mighty!
As you read and study His word, wisdom, discretion, and understanding will come.
There will be clarity and everything will become explicit.
That which has been a puzzle is suddenly dissolved, and enigmas are unraveled.
As singles, when you are confused, get into that word. Clarity will come. Decisions to take will seep into your spirit.
As couples, rather than pick up draining quarrels with your spouse, use this deliverance method instead!
God still guides.
He has shown us His deliverance method, stick with it and He will bail you out of that imbroglio!
Satan’s Sneaky Strategy Through Thoughts. Thoughts! Thoughts! Thoughts!
That’s his channel, his pipe way, his major interest, the very same reason the mind is referred to as the battlefield.
If you refuse to lose in your thought realm, then you will not lose in life. But if you lose there, there is little anybody can do.
The devil doesn’t waste his time trying several weapons against you. He studies you and deploys arsenals that are specific to your weakness, usually beginning from your thoughts.
Most marriages have been messed up, not by outright sinful adventures, but by seemingly harmless thoughts.
The devil bombards your mind endlessly, filling your thoughts with images that are designed to trap you, weaken you, and draw you away from God’s favour.
This is why you have to consciously build a fence around your mind.
Pro 4:23 (AMPC) Keep and guard your heart with all vigilance and above all that you guard, for out of it flow the springs of life.
You are responsible for securing your hearts against fiery darts, sexual thoughts, pornographic images, undressing people with your mind, and so on and so forth.
Guard your mind and do not allow thoughts about some other persons aside from your spouse to infiltrate your mind.
If you live your thought gate open carelessly, intruders will flood your mind and mess it up.
In no time, you find yourself becoming what you are thinking.
If those thoughts already infiltrated your mind, what do you do?
2Co 10:5 (KJV) Casting down imaginations, and every high thing that exalteth itself against the knowledge of God, and bringing into captivity every thought to the obedience of Christ;
Cast them down. When you do, the Holy Spirit is there to help you so that your mind can be sanctified! This is done by filling your mind with His Word. Spend a lot of time in the Word!
You can have the mind of Christ where the Holy Spirit begins to think through you.
As you begin to take responsibility for your thoughts, you will begin to take charge of your life.
May God bless, strengthen and hold you by the right hand in your relationship and marriage in Jesus’ name!
The Irresistible Power of Your Beloved’s Voice. Words. Utterances. Extremely powerful. Words come out with a sound. Everything begins with a sound. When heaven went quiet for thirty minutes, it was recorded because heaven is a place for sounds!
Nobody gets married without words. You have to ask for her hand in marriage. And there is no true union without a response. The agreement has to be mutual, and validated by what is said.
On the wedding day, husband and wife come together in a string covenant recognized by God Himself, and yet all they did was say some “words” we usually refer to as vows.
When these words are spoken, something miraculous takes place in the realm of the spirit and the man and woman become one flesh!
It would have been easier if they become one spirit. One flesh? That is how powerful words are.
That is why God attributes judgment to those who break the covenant because they are coming against their very words.
When a baby enters the milieu for the first time, he has to make a sound.
Words are powerful.
The Irresistible Power of Your Beloved’s Voice
If the words of a man were that powerful, how much more would be the words of God?
How great would it be to hear God speak to you? How blessed can you be if you refuse to make any move until you have heard Him?
How great will it be for relationships and marriage wherein the lovers won’t do anything until they have heard Him?
All our troubles, were they not initiated because we did not listen to Him and we choose to respond to the voice and dictates of our flesh?
The Irresistible Power of Your Beloved’s Voice
The beauty of listening to Him before acting is that His voice comes with power. A lot of power. Enough to destabilize the enemy, render opposition ineffective, reduce them to ruins, and give you a resounding victory!
Song of Solomon 2:8 (KJV) The voice of my beloved! behold, he cometh leaping upon the mountains, skipping upon the hills.
The voice of God has the capacity to leap over mountains and skip over hills!
That issue, that problem, that imbroglio, cannot and will never defy the voice of God!
Before you conclude on your fiancee or spouse, listen to what God is saying! His instructions come with the power to overcome that very issue!
The quality of your life is pegged by the quality of your thoughts. If you think you can, you are right. If you think you can’t, you are also right! Too many relationships and marriages have been ruined by the kinds of thoughts that were entertained. Thoughts are so powerful that they will eventually overwhelm your life and give your life direction.
In this devotional, we will delve into the power of thoughts and how they shape our lives. We will also explore how negative thoughts can ruin relationships and marriages, and how to stop negative thoughts.
Dealing With Negative Thoughts
Have you ever wondered why some people seem to have everything they want, while others struggle to make ends meet? The answer lies in the power of thoughts. Your thoughts shape your beliefs, which in turn shape your actions. And your actions determine the quality of your life.
Dealing With Negative Thoughts
The Power of Thoughts
Thoughts are so powerful that the greatest robberies were first carried out mentally before execution. Thoughts can be so healthy that they would drive sicknesses away. Thoughts can be so sickening to the point of physical paralysis. How do you convince a man or woman to become a suicide bomber? They simply work on the thought realm. Once the person embraces the proposition in the thought realm, the rest is easy.
The power of thoughts is not limited to negative thoughts. Positive thoughts can also have a profound impact on our lives. When you think positively, you attract positive things into your life. You become more confident, more optimistic, and more resilient.
No wonder, the method through which God will change you daily into becoming who He wants you to be is through the renewal of your mind.
“And be not conformed to this world: but be ye transformed by the renewing of your mind, that ye may prove what is that good, and acceptable, and perfect, will of God.” (Rom 12:2, KJV)
Transformation comes as a child of God as you read, study and meditate on God’s word.
Dealing With Negative Thoughts
Negative Thoughts Can Ruin Relationships and Marriages
In the same way, the method that the devil would use if he wants to ruin a relationship or marriage is through thoughts. Precisely, negative thoughts and lies!
All the quarrels in a relationship and marriage first of all start in your thoughts. When you are negative-minded, full of doubts and mistrust, the relationship or marriage in question will be shaky.
When you are negative-minded, you will misinterpret every effort of your spouse. You will suspect every move and you will not give your spouse breathing space.
Dealing With Bad Dreams and Nightmares. Dreams are like windows into the realm of the spirit. Dreams can come from God, from the devil, and from you.
God can warn you through dreams. They are often a language of the Holy Spirit through which He communicates to us and warns us of dangers ahead.
The devil can cause dreams too through which he injects the spirit of fear and trepidation in other to create a loophole and have access into your lives. Once the spirit of fear grips you and you do nothing about it, it’s an expressway for the devil to cause chaos and carry out his plans.
Some dreams are harmless, however. These are the ones you have because of the multitude of thoughts and watching too many films or playing an engrossing game. Suddenly you become Jack Bauer and you want to help complete his mission in 24!
Dealing With Bad Dreams and Nightmares
Now, if you have the gift of seeing and knowing, you have to be careful of what you feed yourself. You have to deliberately avoid junk in order not to contaminate that gift!
Back to the issue of bad dreams, once you have them, when you wake up, go into the offensive using relevant scriptures, come against those dreams, take authority over them, nullify them, plead the blood of Jesus, and declare that only the counsel of God will stand in your life!
Joel 2:28 says we will dream dreams! Dreams can be a tool in the hand of the Lord.
Ensure that you are not living in any habitual sins so that the pipe way of information can be sanctified. Once contaminated, confusion sets in!
Dealing With Bad Dreams and Nightmares
You will not be confused in Jesus’ name!
Every spirit assigned to waste opportunities around you via bad dreams, we take authority over them in Jesus’ name!
Join Revive Prayers throughout this week as we pray against bad dreams!
The Reluctance to Change In Marriage. In marriage, you only have to choose once. Circumstances emerge that present an opportunity to choose again, and even again, but those experiences are not what you pray for, and they usually come with unpleasant accomplices. Nobody prays for the loss of a spouse, separation, or divorce.
Ideally, you are stuck in a marriage with that fellow. You better choose wisely if you are still single.
And if you have chosen, decide to make it work and go the long haul.
Marriage is not designed with reverse gear except in very extreme cases.
The Reluctance to Change In Marriage
I am over fifty, and my wife is almost fifty, and we have not really changed. We only become “mature” in our tendencies.
It’s as simple as that. I am still as playful and funny as I used to be. She is still as “reserved’ as she used to be.
Yes, she borrows my playfulness a few times, as occasions demand, but she is essentially who she is. Reserved.
I borrow her reservation, a couple of times, but inside me, in the midst of the reservation, I am still as naughty as ever.
Playfulness and reservation in all excellencies!
The Reluctance to Change In Marriage
That difference was what attracted us.
Then that same difference irritated and repelled us when we got married. And then we wanted to change one another. Frustrating attempts.
Then we had to learn how to manage the differences to have peace at home.
Then the differences we didn’t want in our spouse, which cause quarrels and endless tantrums, become what you smile and laugh over. That is maturity!
That point is where you must get to and then life becomes peaceful and enjoyable.
The differences to live with do not include bad habits and sinful dispositions. Those are to be prayerfully and lovingly confronted and refused for the health of the marriage and the upbringing of the children.
That is how it works.
Those that are still single, don’t get lost in the ice cream or in the movie halls. Don’t enter his inner chamber yet! Choose wisely. Dig dip and pray well, the first thing is not sex! Never! That confuses the soul! Sex should be reserved till after marriage!
Unleashing Your Best Self In Marriage. Growing up in my family, I had several responsibilities in the house. At one time, I was the “sweeper” Can you imagine? I hated sweeping the living room with a passion. But that was my job and I had to do it because I am a member of the family. At one time, I had to do the dishes. At another time, I was the car washer! The only thing remaining for me was to open a car wash!
I remembered the day I locked my youngest siblings, aged 6 and 4, in the car, wind up, and forgot them there for over two hours. When I remembered, I rushed downstairs to open the car door, they were both there crying and sweating like no man’s business. That was the last day I allowed them to move near the car when I am doing the washing.
Unleashing Your Best Self In Marriage
The point here is that every family member has something he has to contribute to the family, in terms of home chores.
As singles and married, we are to have the regular “chores” we do in the church we belong to!
I really don’t understand believers who do nothing in their local assembly! A church is a spiritual family unit and everybody should have “chores”
As a matter of fact, when a single person says he has found a lover, my next question is always, which church? And which unit does he belong to?
I want to know if that person is responsible in his local assembly.
Does it mean a church worker will not have issues in marriage? I never said that. But being a worker and showing some level of responsibility is a step ahead of someone who attends church and does nothing, contributing nothing.
We don’t have that kind of spirit.
In the same way, married couples, find something to do in your local assembly. Be responsible. Pay your tithe, and be involved. When you are faithful in what belongs to others, then God will give you your own. Serve, Do your part, and be interested in advancing God’s kingdom
Unleashing Your Best Self In Marriage
There is a blessing in serving God over you, your family, your finances, and your health! See it here:
Exodus 23:25 (KJV) And ye shall SERVE the LORD your God, and he shall BLESS thy bread, and thy water; and I will TAKE SICKNESS AWAY from the midst of thee.
The reason Mr. Johnson and Mrs. Johnson kept quarreling and never understood each other was that they actually don’t understand God’s love.
If singles can ensure they marry someone who understands a little of the depth of God’s love, a lot of complications will be averted.
What do I mean?
Let me take you back to the text we have been considering for the past few days. This is something the Holy Spirit showed me, right?
NB: Singles and Couples’ Hubs Whatsapp Meeting is Weekly. Use the links below to join and participate
Mat 8:5-8 (KJV) And when Jesus was entered into Capernaum, there came unto him a centurion, beseeching him, [6] And saying, Lord, my servant lieth at home sick of the palsy, grievously tormented. [7] And Jesus saith unto him, I will come and heal him. [8] The centurion answered and said, Lord, I am not worthy that thou shouldest come under my roof: but speak the word only, and my servant shall be healed.
The Love Secret Every Couple Should Know
What the centurion responded with is our focus this morning.
I am not worthy that you should come under my roof…
How many times have we messed up in our relationships and marriages that we have concluded, there is no need to pray? I can’t even invite God to come under my roof!
How much of negative words have we uttered that have become swords of cryptic decoration hanging down from the roofs of our marital roofs, lacerating and causing more wounds on the lovers?
And the devil taking this back to God to accuse you to God, based on the words he instigated you to say?
And then coming back to accuse God to you convincing you that Jesus can’t come under your roof because so much damage has been done!
REVIVE CONVERSATIONS now holds on ZOOM!Drop all relationship /marital questions, issues, and troubles ANONYMOUSLY, or just vent and pour your heart out. We will respond and judge the situation together by 9.00pm (Tuesdays and Thursdays) – https://khcng.com/vent/
And you believing all this, you are not worthy to come under my roof.
The Love Secret Every Couple Should Know
However, in an incredible twist of divine love, such that we have not comprehended the length, breadth, width, and depth of it, Jesus wants to come into your HEART, not just your roof.
His entrance into your heart is what will bring peace under your roof. With Him in your hearts, no third party can infiltrate your roof.
Dear single, look for the one whose heart has been completely occupied and has no vacancy for any other.
Dear couples, seek to grant an entrance to Jesus in your hearts and let His love and His word regulate your marriage.
This is where peace, Shalom, nothing missing, nothing broken begins from.
The Romantic Yes You Want To Have. The day was like any other day. But It was to remain a special day for me and there would be no way I would write the story of my life without referencing that day. It was the day my wife said Yes!
We were campus sweethearts and our love story was woven on the threads of the Institution we attended.
She had come to collect her plate, (another story entirely), when I got that almost elusive Yes!
What an excitement as the realization of finally having a whole human being agree to go on the marital journey with me. Do I have to tell you I was both full of ecstasy and fear at the same time? (Again, another story)
The Romantic Yes You Want To Have. God will never refuse you!
That Yes can begin a new course of life, but a lot of people have their story of several “NO”s. Feelings of being rejected and jilted are not pleasant at all.
Are we aware that God will not refuse anybody who asks for His help? Yes, His answer may not be the method we wanted, but He will always respond.
In the verses we have been looking at:
Mat 8:5-7 (KJV) And when Jesus was entered into Capernaum, there came unto him a centurion, beseeching him, [6] And saying, Lord, my servant lieth at home sick of the palsy, grievously tormented. [7] And Jesus saith unto him, I will come and heal him.
Jesus didn’t say, sorry I can’t come.
He never says, your case is “irreconcilable!’
Have you really taken your relationship or marriage to Him? Or you are busy trying to figure things on your own, installing spy apps to monitor your spouse, cameras around the house, recording calls, and so many actions emanating from insecurities and mistrust.
The Romantic Yes You Want To Have. Is the Relationship or Marriage Sick?
Like this man said, “my servant lieth at home sick…”, have you ever told Jesus, “my marriage lieth at home sick…”
You know what, Jesus will never refuse you. He will come. He will come with His winnowing fan and clean out every marital junk from your marriage!
Mat 3:12 (AMPC) His winnowing fan (shovel, fork) is in His hand, and He will thoroughly clear out and clean His threshing floor and gather and store His wheat in His barn, but the chaff He will burn up with fire that cannot be put out.
That is powerful!
Take a look at the Message Translation:
Mat 3:12 (MSG) He’s going to clean house—make a clean sweep of your lives. He’ll place everything true in its proper place before God; everything false he’ll put out with the trash to be burned.”
The Romantic Yes You Want To Have. Let Him Clean the House!
God knows how to clean the house. He would place the side chick in her proper place! He would place the husband and wife in their proper places. Every false guys and side chicks will be trashed out!
Before you call on the lawyer, call on Jesus. He will not refuse you.
Do You Truly Desire Your Lover? The Johnsons have been married for a while. Too many quarrels riddled their marriage and they are at their wits’ end.
Bode and Sally who have been in a relationship for two years are also at a point where they want out. They feel they have exhausted all possibilities.
Yesterday, I admonish us from a scripture:
Mat 8:5 (KJV) And when Jesus was entered into Capernaum, there came unto him a centurion, beseeching him,
I explained that Jesus entered, Capernaum, and the centurion came unto him. Jesus entrance wasn’t enough to complete the cycle of an intervention, the centurion had to go to him.
REVIVE CONVERSATIONS now holds on ZOOM!Drop all relationship /marital questions, issues, and troubles ANONYMOUSLY, or just vent and pour your heart out. We will respond and judge the situation together by 9.00pm (Tuesdays and Thursdays) – https://khcng.com/vent/
But I want to talk to singles and married this morning, that after Jesus entered, the centurion came, there is still one more thing to do.
Do You Truly Desire Your Lover?
The scripture says that the centurion came, BESEECHING Him!
One of the meaning of the root word is “Desire”
Do you really desire your partner?
Or is somebody distracting you out there and messing up with the “desire juice’ meant for your partner?
Have you really beseeched the Lord about your relationship or marriage?
NB: Singles and Couples’ Hubs Whatsapp Meeting is Weekly. Use the links below to join and participate
When last did you pray together? I mean together, not some isolated grumbling where you are asking God to judge your partner speedily! If possible, kill him joor!
Ha! Has it come to that?
Marriage is such a strong one flesh arrangement that any prayer you offer against your spouse is a prayer against yourself.
Before you conclude, on separation or divorce, Have you allowed Jesus to enter? Have you gone to Jesus? Have you beseeched Him?
Do You Truly Desire Your Lover?
There is a price to pay for a blissful marriage. It is never automatic.
There are things to do. Beseeching involves exploring all forms of communication, counseling, therapy, counsels and all.
Not that you are ready to drop your spouse like hot potatoes at the slightest provocation.
Go to the Lord with genuine desire for your relationship and marriage and beseech Him.
Crossing the Divide: An Entrance And A Coming. You are born again. Your spouse or fiancee is born again. You both go to church. And for that, you believe so much it’s going to be living joyfully ever after.
But it didn’t turn out to be. Issues arose. Differences spiked. Hot voluptuous words were vociferously exchanged. Things fell apart quickly and in an unbelievable happenstance, the one you loved so much became the one you are irritated with so much.
You could not reconcile the days he used to show up with chocolates and gifts with the present day he would show up with frowns and a cranky attitude.
He complains about everything.
She is so disrespectful.
He is so insensitive and uncaring.
She doesn’t know how to cook again. Her soup is now sour.
He simply deceived me. How did I fall for his lies? He really didn’t love me.
The both of you begin to wonder how you claim to have Jesus and all of this is happening.
Crossing the Divide: An Entrance And A Coming
Well, let me admonish you from one verse the Holy Spirit quickened to me early in my prayer time this morning.
Mat 8:5 (KJV) And when Jesus was entered into Capernaum, there came unto him a centurion, beseeching him,
Just as Jesus entered Capernaum, He did enter your lives. But that is not the end of the story.
That verse went on to posit, that there came unto Him…
It is not enough that Jesus entered your lives, now you must come unto Him.
Both of you.
Consciously. Deliberately.
Crossing the Divide: An Entrance And A Coming
You must seek Him in your relationship and marriage, and involve Him in all you do.
You may be an expert lover boy or lover babe, but your romantic dexterity will not be enough to navigate the complex waters of marital endeavor.
So daily, if possible, hourly, you call on Him, you converse, you listen, and you heed His instructions.
After nearly 24 years after wedding my wife, I can tell you this works.
Put Him first place. Honour Him and then you will know how to Honour one another.
Number One Quality To Look Out For. Do you really want to know? Having been married for 24 years, I can tell you that quality is Meekness! It is one quality that will help your relationship last longer! Meekness means being submissive, and teachable. It does not mean being weak or weak-willed; rather, it is strength under control. The dictionary says that meekness can be seen as having or showing a quiet and gentle nature; not wanting to fight or argue with other people.
Let’s take a look at the scriptures: 1Pe 3:3-4 (KJV) Whose adorning let it not be that outward adorning of plaiting the hair, and of wearing of gold, or of putting on of apparel; [4] But let it be the hidden man of the heart, in that which is not corruptible, even the ornament of a MEEK and quiet spirit, which is in the sight of God of great price.
Number One Quality To Look Out For
Here the scriptures advise that besides beauty, which is evident in adorning the hair, use of jewelry, and nice wear, let there be an adorning of the heart as well–this is an ornament of MEEKNESS (or being MEEK). You see, we all come into relationships and marriages with baggage–unwanted thoughts and feelings from past emotional upheavals, tensions arising from strained relationships in the past, highly opinionated postures emanating from parental upbringing, warped ideas resulting from emotional, verbal, sexual, and physical abuses.
To be teachable and submissive is the only way to make it in a relationship or marriage. A hard posture and statue-like stance will almost always destroy any relationship or marriage. Flexibility and willingness to adjust and learn new things will go a long way to add spice and fun to your relationship or marriage. Beware of opinionated, stubborn, and unwilling to change-partners!
Even as a child of God, your success is predicated on the continual renewal of your mind with the word of God. This constant transformation has to be taking place. That is why you go to church; that’s why we send you KHC devotional daily; that’s why you should read your Bible daily.
Number One Quality To Look Out For 2Co 3:18 (KJV) But we all, with open face beholding as in a glass the glory of the Lord, are changed into the same image from glory to glory, even as by the Spirit of the Lord.
If you are already in a relationship or married, that is one way to start changing. You cannot change your lover or spouse; if you attempt it, you will be frustrated. But with the word of God and its study, anybody can make a change in his or her life.
God loves those who are meek and teachable! Psa 25:9 (KJV) The meek will He guide in judgment: and the meek will He teach his way.
The meek person will always rise to the top in any situation. Psalms 147:6 (KJV) The LORD lifteth up the meek: he casteth the wicked down to the ground.
The point is that you should look out for a meek lover.
Beware of any lover who doesn’t want to be taught, who is not submissive to any authority, and that his or her parents cannot talk to.
One of the saddest statements I have heard in counseling sessions was when a person said their spouse doesn’t listen to anybody, not even their parents!
Do not marry anybody who is not accountable to someone! If you do, you are on your own!
Pay Attention: Don’t Dismiss These Statements. At work, Mrs. Johnson became sidetracked and started falling for another man. Despite her sincere love for God, she was losing ground. She found it hard to believe. Her emotions were like a roller coaster, and her mind was chaotic. Her spouse didn’t understand the delicate predicament she was in despite her repeated attempts to communicate it to him in very subtle ways.
George, who was seeing Sandy, was, however, being sidetracked by another woman. In an effort to combat the new feelings, he tried to obtain Sandy’s attention. However, Sandy was busy, which made him more vulnerable.
The truth is that comments made by married people or single people who are courting frequently reveal the depth of the trap in a marriage or relationship.
Your words can frequently disclose the types of problems you have and need to address, even if you are single and not in a relationship.
There are distractions. There are several types of traps. There are constant psychological and marital assaults.
Demonically planted traps, similar to those used to catch rats, are everywhere. Snares practically everywhere you turn.
There are some comments your partner or sweetheart makes that indicate they are preoccupied and need your attention.
In these situations, you need to be there for your partner since without you, nothing will get better.
What are these statements?
Pay Attention: Don’t Dismiss These Statements
1. You’re too busy to see me again
Your partner is constantly around you, so why does he or she say this? You must pay attention to avoid having someone else emotionally fill your position. This statement is asking you to free up some time so your partner or spouse can receive assurance that will help them cope with their new wave of emotions.
Don’t disregard it!
Stop defending!
Avoid arguing!
Make time to engage in some thought-provoking dialogue.
Let me say something to single people who are not involved in a relationship.
A single friend who says this to you is attempting to express interest while gauging your response to determine whether to pursue or back off. Analyzing the situation!
So you may respond with “no thanks” if you don’t like the individual and aren’t thinking about making any obligations.
The response will either be a green or red light.
Pay Attention: Don’t Dismiss These Statements
2. You are far from where I am.
Don’t take this statement from your partner lightly. Avoid getting into a battle or a disagreement. Pay attention to what is said and what is not stated.
Even though you may be physically close to the person you love, your emotional distance from them may be great. Couples who share a bed frequently lament their loneliness for this reason. Seems absurd, right? It is the truth!
This person is trying to tell you that the more emotionally distant you are, the larger the void you leave for others to fill.
Prioritize your relationship with your partner, married couples.
There is a twist to this phrase for individuals who are dating but are not yet married. You need to determine whether the statement is sincere or just an invitation to indulge in sex. Here, prudence and tact are required. God bless you!
Two Signs of A Toxic Marriage. Similar to how an ailment can afflict an individual without becoming evident for some time, a marriage can be unhealthy without the obvious manifestation of underlying issues.
Nonetheless, signs are bound to reveal themselves. Although there are numerous warning signs, we shall examine a few this morning.
Two Signs of A Toxic Marriage
1. Lack of a Spiritual Connection
A marriage in which the couple does not have a spiritual connection with God is likely to deteriorate with time.
Building a successful home necessitates the involvement of a higher power.
Psalm 127:1 (KJV) states, “Except the Lord build the house, they labour in vain that build it: except the Lord keep the city, the watchman waketh but in vain.”
It is only through the intervention of God that a house can become a home.
It is not enough to have a passing relationship with God; it must be built and nurtured.
This concept also applies to singles who are preparing to meet or are already in a courtship with their beloved. Falling in love with someone who does not have a profound spiritual connection is ill-advised.
It is effortless to discern whether an individual has a spiritual connection with God or not. His actions, words, choices, and priorities reveal the kind of person he is.
Don’t settle for just a good-looking partner; aim for a spiritually mature and deep individual.
A man who genuinely knows God will not resort to hitting or beating his wife, while a woman who is familiar with God will not be a perpetual source of annoyance to her husband.
Why did I say this is toxic? A person without a deep relationship with God will have no restraint and will eventually mess things up.
Two Signs of A Toxic Marriage
2. Lack of Accountability
An unaccountable couple is perched atop a keg of gunpowder that could detonate at any moment.
Wisdom is the foundation of life, and every error and setback is a manifestation of foolishness lurking within.
Accountability provides a means to learn from older couples and those who have been in your shoes before.
Falling in love with an unaccountable person is the most dangerous thing one can do in life. To those who have ears, hear now!
The saddest part of counseling is often the conversation that goes like this:
“Who is his/her pastor?” “He does not have a pastor.”
“What about his parents?” “His parents cannot speak to him. He won’t listen.”
“Does he listen to any of his friends?” “None of his friends can talk to him.”
“Then who does he listen to?” “He listens to nobody!”
Once an individual has alienated themselves from all authority figures, isolated themselves from any help, and disconnected themselves from those who can provide guidance, the situation becomes complicated.
Therefore, it is prudent to consider only those who are accountable when seeking a partner. For those already married, it is essential to address accountability lovingly and prayerfully.
This is toxic because marriage without accountability will resort to manipulation and the like, with nobody to correct the ignorance and arrogance that come with a life that is not accountable
May God assist us all.
These are two of the warning signs of an unhealthy marriage. I will be concluding here this morning.
Deconstructing the Significance of Saying ‘I Do’. When you said “I do” on your wedding day, something incredible happened. It’s almost crazy to think about it! Your body is no longer just your own; it now belongs to your spouse.
A powerful fusion takes place in the spiritual realm, so intense that even God declared, “let no man put asunder!”
God bears witness to this union, and any attempt to come between it is an attack on God Himself.
Deconstructing the Significance of Saying ‘I Do’
As believers who are rooted and grounded, the devil’s tactics against you are strategic.
If you’re a weak believer with no firm foundation, he can easily tempt you with adultery and infidelity, leading you astray from God.
But even for those who are firmly grounded, the devil still has tricks up his sleeve. His weapon is to keep you divided, to torment you with negative thoughts and perpetual strife.
Even though you may not be committing adultery, your negative thoughts can be just as destructive.
This negativity will infect your whole family because your thoughts have magnetic power and will affect everything around you.
Deconstructing the Significance of Saying ‘I Do’
How can you pray and agree together when one spouse’s mind is full of doubt, contempt, and dislike for the other?
This is the devil’s work, and it often shows up in small ways. Your spouse may seem happy and engaged when talking to others but then become easily irritated when it’s just the two of you.
The friend you fell in love with during courtship may seem to have disappeared!
Sometimes, this shows up as singles in courtship too. Unexplainable and perpetual irritation from one party could be an indication of deep-seated issues.
If you’re experiencing this, take responsibility for your own actions and ask God for help before blaming your spouse.
Blaming each other is like a General Manager who blames his employees for losses and the employees who blame the Manager for their ineffectiveness. It creates a stalemate!
Stop playing the blame game! It’s a trap from the devil. Instead, humble yourself and seek God’s guidance.
Deconstructing the Significance of Saying ‘I Do’
It is not a prudent use of your time to engage in fruitless endeavors, as there is a plethora of things to do!
What rationale exists for subjecting oneself to a forty-day fast, only to subsequently engage in four days of discordant behavior that serves to discredit one’s previous efforts?
What purpose is served by dedicating years to cultivating the growth of seeds, only to then carelessly uproot them with a thoughtless and egocentric tongue?
Decide to align yourself with a unified front in the face of the adversary that seeks to undermine the well-being of your soul.
From the moment you enter into holy matrimony, the prospect of achieving success through individual means is rendered null and void.
Therefore, it is incumbent upon you to eschew minor disputes and disagreements, and instead adopt a harmonious approach that enables both partners to partake in God’s favor.
For those in the courtship phase of a romantic relationship, the continued indulgence of contentious attitudes represents a gross misapplication of personal power and potential.
May the grace of the Almighty bless your relationships, marriages, and households, now and forevermore.
Unveiling The Hidden Passions Of Every Woman. This morning, I want to enter the shoes of a woman and write as though I am a woman. Are you ready?
Did you know that men and women are wired differently? Yup, we are! So, as a lady, I can tell you that there are some things that we all desire deep down. Here are five of the deepest desires of every woman, expressed in a more relatable manner:
1. Read my body language, babe!
Ladies can be complicated creatures, but that doesn’t mean you can’t try to understand us better! We’re not always the best with words, but we’re experts at non-verbal communication. So, if you really want to make us feel loved and understood, pay attention to our body language and try to pick up on our needs. Trust me, we’ll appreciate it!
Unveiling The Hidden Passions Of Every Woman
2. Slow down and show me some love!
Okay, guys, let me be real with you. Sometimes, you guys can be a bit too quick to get to the good stuff. But us ladies need a little more time to warm up, if you catch my drift. So, slow it down, take your time, and give us some extra attention and affection before we get down to the bedroom business. Trust me, it’ll be worth it!
Singles ladies you don’t need foreplay for anything! You don’t need any play!
Follow this advice here:
Son 2:7 (MSG) Oh, let me warn you, sisters in Jerusalem, by the gazelles, yes, by all the wild deer: Don’t excite love, don’t stir it up, until the time is ripe—and you’re ready.
It is clear from that scripture. Don’t stir anything up. All those making out, kissing, and smooching are nothing other than afflictions.
Unveiling The Hidden Passions Of Every Woman
3. Tell me I’m beautiful, baby!
We all have days where we don’t feel our best, and that’s when we need our man to step up and remind us just how beautiful we are. So, don’t just think it, say it! And don’t just tell us we look pretty, tell us why you think we’re beautiful. It’ll make all the difference, trust me!
For singles in courtship, it is okay to use good words and proclaim what you want to see in your future wife. Words are powerful, so use them to your advantage.
4. Surprise me, sugar!
There’s nothing quite like a surprise to show us how much you care. It doesn’t have to be anything big or expensive, just something that shows you were thinking of us. Whether it’s a thoughtful gift or a spontaneous outing, it’ll make us feel special and loved.
Unveiling The Hidden Passions Of Every Woman
5. Pray for me, honey!
Finally, one of the deepest desires of every woman is to feel spiritually connected with her man. So, don’t forget to pray for us, guys! It’s one of the best ways you can show us you care and it’ll fill us with confidence and peace. And trust me, we could all use a little more of that in our lives! How about prophesying into our lives regularly? That can be romantic too!
Singles, pray more than have fun all over the place. The cinemas, the beach visits, the outings, and the Ice creams are all good, but they should not be done at the expense of spiritual exercises like praying!
