Life as a married couple is extremely demanding and requires a lot of wisdom.
There are many areas you should focus on as couples. This morning, I will be identifying just a few of these areas as we all make up our minds to work on our marriages. Singles should learn from this too as a preparation for their wedding.
Pay attention to these details, and your marriage will flourish.
Focus On These Areas In Marriage
1. You should never make your partner feel threatened.
Marriage is a collaboration, not a boss-bondmaid relationship. Nobody is better or worse than anyone else.
Learn to value one another as human beings first. The husband is the head of the household, but it does not make him superior.
The wife is to submit but that does not mean she should be muted and silenced in the home.
Husbands must come into that place of maturity to give wings to their wives to fly while wives must learn to be a help meet indeed by fully submitting to their wives and respecting them.
Focus On These Areas In Marriage
2. Never allow for adultery or infidelity.
It is never worth it, no matter how much you are tempted. Adultery will always be regarded as a dumb sin.
Extramarital affairs are frequently extremely expensive. Nothing compares to the cost of shattered trust.
Stay together and eliminate every emotional interference.
3. Never deny each other.
Don’t deprive your spouse of the enjoyment God intended for sex in marriage. Try various styles. Proper hygiene is also essential.
On the other hand, singles are to keep their bodies under and not indulge in sexual compromise.
The biblical instruction remains the same, sex should be kept till after the wedding! God is not about to change that injunction!
Focus On These Areas In Marriage
4. Maintaining secrets in a marriage is a dead end.
It is likely that you withhold certain sensitive subjects from your spouse for a better time. But no secrets, please. Be open and be transparent with one another. Whatever is covered never heals, and moreover, if your partner had to discover themselves, the trust would have been broken.
If this has happened once, forgive and move on but learn from it!
O Lord, Where Is My Spouse? From counseling experiences, I know some of us have done all we know to do and yet it doesn’t look like anything is happening. When you find yourself at this point, what do you do? What else is there to do?
I want to write to both singles and married this morning. For singles, It can really be frustrating when it looks like nearly all your friends are married except you. It is even more frustrating to know that some of those who are already married are not as beautiful as you and they are not as spiritual as you!
“If anybody should be married by now, it ought not to be Sister Sube who got born again last year! I have been serving God consistently for five years! What is happening here?“
O Lord, Where Is My Spouse? Here are a few things to know that will help you.
The Covenant
The first thing that you need to know that will help you in this situation where you might be experiencing a seeming delay is that you are a child of Covenant. This knowledge is the foundation of the entirety of your Christian life. It is on this spiritual truth that every other blessing springs. You must have a consciousness of that Covenant.
Listen to me, you are not just here floating to nowhere, you are in a covenant! A covenant is like an agreement that cannot be broken. You are in a certain agreement with God concerning your life, marriage, and destiny! This covenant stipulates that you can never be abandoned by God!
It is not just possible. Its possibility does not exist, that God will abandon you! How do I know? God swore by Himself and put His throne on the line, that all He has promised you, He will bring to pass and that He is committed until it is completed.
Take a look at it:
Hebrews 16 – 19 For men verily swear by the greater: and an oath for confirmation is to them an end of all strife. Wherein God, willing more abundantly to shew unto the heirs of promise the immutability of his counsel, confirmed it by an oath: That by two immutable things, in which it was impossible for God to lie, we might have a strong consolation, who have fled for refuge to lay hold upon the hope set before us: Which hope we have as an anchor of the soul, both sure and stedfast, and which entereth into that within the veil;
This is the anchor of your soul. When doubts come, when tests and trials come, when your faith is shaky, when your feet seems imbalanced, when your heart begins to vacillate, what will keep you strong and unshakable is nothing other than the covenant.
If you are a child of the covenant, you are too covered, too blessed, too favoured. This covenant sense and perspective must be there in your life. It is on this covenant that you stand.
How can this covenant be rooted in your heart? You have to understand the terms of the covenant first. The terms can only be found in the covenant document and that is God’s word. Get familiar with it. Get to know and study what rights you have in God.
When you are oblivious to this covenant and the covenant rights, you will be easily depressed and discouraged from time to time.
When you get to know this covenant, it will give birth to something powerful. It will give birth to Assurance!
O Lord, Where Is My Spouse?
For married couples, the covenant consciousness will ensure an infidelity-free marriage. Once the couple recognizes that they are in covenant with each other and the covenant witness is God Himself, it will engender a distaste for sin. Who really wants to offend God in that sense?
The covenant awareness will keep both of you sane. This is why you should strive as couples to be covenant minded in your marriage.
Covenant violation does not come with nice consequences.
Dan 11:32 (AMPC) And such as violate the covenant he shall pervert and seduce with flatteries, but the people who know their God shall prove themselves strong and shall stand firm and do exploits [for God]. Good morning.
CONFESSION I am a child of the Covenant PRAYER Lord, open my eyes to see all that belong to me in the covenant
THOUGHT That by two immutable things, in which it was impossible for God to lie, we might have a strong consolation…
Oil for Today: Day 383 – Prayer For Relationship And Marriage
Prayer 1
Let’s begin to thank for His mercy
Ps.136.1 – O give thanks unto the LORD; for he is good: for his mercy endureth for ever.
Prayer 2
Lord, I speak mercy to my marriage/relationship.
Job 22.28 – Thou shalt also decree a thing, and it shall be established unto thee: and the light shall shine upon thy ways.
Prayer 3
Lord turn every evil counsel of the wicked over my marriage/relationship to foolishness
2Sam.15.31b – And David said, O LORD, I pray thee, turn the counsel of Ahithophel into foolishness.
Prayer 4
Lord Jesus take over the building of my marriage/relationship
Ps.127.1(MSG) – If GOD doesn’t build the house, the builders only build shacks. If GOD doesn’t guard the city, the night watchman might as well nap.
Prayer 5
I receive wisdom and understanding for my marriage/relationship.
Prov.24.3 (MSG)- It takes wisdom to build a house, and understanding to set it on a firm foundation;
Prayer 6
Wealth and glory accompany my marriage/relationship in the name of Jesus.
Prov.8.18 – Riches and honour are with me; yea, durable riches and righteousness.
Prayer 7
My marriage/relationship is fruitful in the name of Jesus.
Gen.9.7 – And you, be ye fruitful, and multiply; bring forth abundantly in the earth, and multiply therein.
Prayer 8
Appreciate God for the answered prayers.
Eph.3.20 – Now unto him that is able to do exceeding abundantly above all that we ask or think, according to the power that worketh in us,
Prayer For Relationship And Marriage
Confession
My marriage/relationship is blessed. I will not lack wisdom and understanding in this marriage/relationship because I have made Christ the foundation. Negative words or counsel will not prevail over my marriage/relationship. The wine therein is fresh everyday and will not end. God is sustaining us with wealth and honour in the name of Jesus. Amen
Help Pastor, We Don’t Communicate Well in Marriage! Communication is so important in marriage. Just as you can do for long without food, the same way, you cannot do without communication in marriage.
There must be good communication between a husband and wife.
A husband and wife must talk about everything and anything. They must not be secretive and they must not hide anything for one another.
Never allow your communication to degenerate into mono-syllable answers, where it seems only one party is doing the talking.
Communication is so important that whole cities and countries have been brought down simply because the two parties involved cannot understand one another.
This is this story of Tower of Babel. They had a great goal; to build a city whose top will reach unto the heavens, God attested to their feat that they would do it.
The only way for God to stop their ambition is to touch their language and they could not understand each other.
Their language became confounded. Once that happened, their project was brought to an abrupt end.
May I dare say that a lot of opportunities have been truncated because the husband and wife are busy fighting and throwing tantrums, and withdrawing from themselves.
Help Pastor, We Don’t Communicate Well in Marriage! Learn to talk in your marriage.
For communication to take place, there must be a person who is willing to receive and another who is willing to share.
When either party does not want to share and at the same time doesn’t want to receive, that may be a major issue there.
Help Pastor, We Don’t Communicate Well in Marriage! If you are the quiet one in your marriage, then you must consciously encourage your spouse when he or she is talking or joking.
Also, deliberately respond to your spouse and don’t just shake your head. Your spouse is not a Radio station which talks alone most of the time.
Be deliberate about good communication. I pray that God grant you more wisdom. Be blessed!
CONFESSION FOR THE DAY I am helped in my marriage. Our communication is getting better.
PRAYER FOR THE DAY Lord, strengthen me in my are of weaknesses
THOUGHT FOR THE DAY Gen 11:7 (MSG) Come, we’ll go down and garble their speech so they won’t understand each other.”
ACTION PLAN FOR THE DAY Decide to initiate a meaningful conversation between you and your spouse
God created you to exercise dominion and authority on earth. It is not right for the one who is to exercise dominion to be dominated. You are to be the man and woman God created you to be.
All such things as insecurities, low self-esteem, rejection, condemnation, guilt, approval addiction, and fears, are all an attempt of the enemy to steal your authority from you. He attempts to make you laden with a poor image of yourself. That devil is a liar.
You have what it takes to have dominion. It was inbuilt into you at creation. Every source of insecurity is giving way right now. You cannot be battling with such feelings and expect to take charge of your life.
You take charge of your life by first knowing and believing what God says about you.
God says;
You are the head and not the tail.
You are acceptable in the beloved.
You are the apple of His eyes.
You can do all things through Christ that strengthens you.
Ye are gods and children of the Highest.
You have been made the righteousness of God in Christ Jesus.
All these and many other promises you have to believe. You are secured in who God says you are. Your approval is not based on your past, who rejected you, your performance, or what you did or didn’t do.
God wants you to enjoy life and have life in abundance. Having life in abundance is being in dominion and exercising your God-given authority, where you are not intimidated by anything or anybody.
Your relationships are good. You are trusting and hoping in the Lord. You have faith in your heavenly Father that He loves you and so he is mindful of you.
Walk in dominion and God bless your marriage.
CONFESSION FOR THE DAY God’s vision over my life will not be prolonged.
PRAYER FOR THE DAY Lord, this year, your vision for my life will speak!
THOUGHT FOR THE DAY This vision–message is a witness pointing to what’s coming. It aches for the coming––it can hardly wait! And it doesn’t lie. If it seems slow in coming, wait. It’s on its way. It will come right on time. Habakkuk 2:3 MSG
ACTION PLAN FOR THE DAY Write down plans for the coming months
