All married couples should be aware of what marriage is before they venture into getting married.
Marriage is not the next step to be taken after you are twenty-four, you have finished your Youth service, you have a good-paying job, you have a good apartment, you are good looking and to crown it all, you have a car.
Marriage is not just to fulfill a social or religious obligation nor is it just to fulfill the procreation commandment in scripture. Marriage is more than all these.
It is high time we begin to view marriage with the eyes of God who created marriage. There is a truth in the heart of God about marriage. Marriage is first of all Spiritual before it is physical, natural, and then societal.
Marriage is a mystery that cannot be explained mentally. It is a representation of the Trinity here on earth. That is, how the Godhead is in heaven, marriage is that on earth.
It is really a mystery that can only be lived according to God’s instructions. It is almost impossible to adequately live a successful marital life without following God.
Two different individuals, born and brought up by two different parents, in two different locations with different experiences, different opinions and outlooks to life, different temperaments and just living their lives with differences so parallel to each other. It is a mystery to have these two people joined together to become one flesh. It is almost impossible.
It takes a revelation and a spiritual understanding of what the marriage relationship is all about. Both parties must be meek and humble enough to learn and ask from God how to go about living this mystery.
Without these revelations and understanding, the marriage relationship will be a mirage. This revelation is progressive in nature. The husband and the wife need to be everyday students in the institution of marriage.
Until a class or lesson is passed, there is no promotion to the next class. It is this promotion that marks our progress in life. Once we devote ourselves to being committed to learning from the mysterious institute of marriage, then we begin to enjoy the benefits.
But seek ye first the kingdom of God, and his righteousness; and all these things shall be added unto you. – Mat 6:33 (KJV)
As we seek God’s kingdom to be established here on earth in our marriages, only then can we begin to see every other thing added to us. We have to aim at doing it in God’s way because that is the only way.
I pray God will enlighten our understanding of the mystery of marriage.
God bless your marriage.
CONFESSION FOR THE DAY I understand the mystery of marriage
PRAYER FOR THE DAY Lord, help me to understand the mystery of marriage.
THOUGHT FOR THE DAY Mat 6:33 (KJV)But seek ye first the kingdom of God, and his righteousness; and all these things shall be added unto you.
ACTION PLAN FOR THE DAY Study the word ‘one flesh’
4. Attach Pain To The Experience Of Having An Affair
Until an affair is associated with pain in the mind and the brain, a thorough work is not done. The erring couple must have several quiet moments of self-talk and deep ruminating of the issue. That’s why depending on the situation, the erring spouse must be left alone to have some sober reflections.
These sober reflections are necessary for certain positive conclusion to be made. Also, a lot of prayers are needed in this period. The support of the other spouse is also needed by not criticizing, nagging and not showing rage or irritability.
A lot of love, emotional support, care and reassuring words should be given to the erring spouse at such times as this.
A spouse should come out of this ordeal stronger, better and bigger, ready to help those on the same predicament. That’s the way God organized things in the kingdom. What you have overcome, you have the Grace to help set others free from.
5. Change The Environment
It might be necessary to change that environment where the affair happened. However, this may not always be possible. If you can’t change your environment, you can at least change what you do within that compromising environment.
If you have lunch breaks together alone with a particular lady, you have to change this. Note that an affair is not necessarily sexual, it could be an emotional affair. Don’t be deceived, an emotional affair is as serious as a sexual affair, in the sight of God, they are the same.
But I say, anyone who even looks at a woman with lust has already committed adultery with her in his heart. –Matthew 5:28 (NLT)
6. Make Sure You Don’t Play The Blame Game.
What has happened has happened. Don’t cry over spilt milk, don’t wallow in self-pity. That is the devil’s domain; you don’t want to cooperate with the devil to make your freedom difficult. You must embrace Gods free gift of forgiveness and obey all His principles. Don’t go to the extreme of condemning yourself.
David committed adultery and murder, yet God called him a man after his own heart. God restored him, and he was one of the most famous kings on earth.
Don’t doubt Gods love, when He says He has forgiven you, He means exactly that. Embrace His love and His forgiveness.
I believe you have found these steps helpful. May God enlighten our darkness in Jesus name.
God bless your marriage!
CONFESSION FOR THE DAY My marriage is blessed and fruitful
PRAYER FOR THE DAY Ask for the grace to be a good spouse
THOUGHT FOR THE DAY I bless GOD every chance I get; my lungs expand with his praise. –Psalms 34:1 (MSG)
ACTION PLAN FOR THE DAY Put the above points to practice
COUPLES – There are certain challenging situations that may arise in marriage. One of this is handling an affair. There are two sides to this situation; there is the part of the erring spouse and that of the other spouse.
In an affair or adultery, the bulk of the work lies on the spouse that had an affair, the responsibility is on him/her. The responsibility of the other spouse is just to be supportive and to forgive.
The erring spouse has the responsibility of being brutally truthful, sincere and repentant.
There are some scenarios that the spouse is under demonic influence and finds it difficult to be sincere or truthful. Prayers to God for healing by giving him/her a new and clean heart will be necessary; this is because to successfully handle an affair squarely requires sincerity and truthfulness.
Let’s see some practical steps in handling an affair.
1. Confrontation
The first step to handling an affair is confronting it. What you don’t confront, you can never change. The erring spouse should come to a place where he/she knows that having an affair is an attempt of the devil to steal, kill and destroy you.
You should call it a sin and not just a mistake; it is not confrontation when you still make excuses or when you explain.
2. Ask For Forgiveness
There is no forgiveness until there is a willingness to turn around from your sins. The erring spouse should acknowledge that he/she needs to be forgiven.
3. Seek Help And Support
That an affair has taken place shows that there are principles you don’t know, or there are principles you are taking for granted. You need to be educated and informed.
This is the time to search for books that talks about how to handle lust, how to handle affairs, how to set healthy boundaries, how to love and satisfy your spouse, etc.
What reading along this line does is that you get enlightened; when light comes, ignorance vanishes. It is also good to learn how you fell, because recognizing the pit-fall will help you avoid such next time.
CONFESSION FOR THE DAY I choose to honor my marriage vows.
PRAYER FOR THE DAY Oh Lord, help me to Bea faithful spouse.
THOUGHT FOR THE DAY I bless GOD every chance I get; my lungs expand with his praise. –Psalms 34:1 (MSG)
ACTION PLAN FOR THE DAY Follow the above steps of you are guilty.
I am sure Peter must have settled a lot of quarrels for many wives. Many felt invaded or, cheated, and that it’s just not fair being a woman.
They felt they had no rights and they are being trampled upon. Apostle Peter must have had compassion for them. Trying to solve their problems; which varied in dimensions, and seemly complicated.
He, by the Holy Spirit’s inspiration, gave this one all-purpose solution. If every wife follows this instruction they will solve all their marital issues and problems.
I got to a point in my life where I realized this very truth.
The instruction is in 1 Peter 3: 1-6, it is what I call the Honor code for all wives.
In like manner, you married women, be submissive to your own husbands [subordinate yourselves as being secondary to and dependent on them, and adapt yourselves to them], so that even if any do not obey the Word [of God], they may be won over not by discussion but by the [godly] lives of their wives, When they observe the pure and modest way in which you conduct yourselves, together with your reverence [for your husband; you are to feel for him all that reverence includes: to respect, defer to, revere him–to honor, esteem, appreciate, prize, and, in the human sense, to adore him, that is, to admire, praise, be devoted to, deeply love, and enjoy your husband]. Let not yours be the [merely] external adorning with [elaborate] interweaving and knotting of the hair, the wearing of jewelry, or changes of clothes; But let it be the inward adorning and beauty of the hidden person of the heart, with the incorruptible and unfading charm of a gentle and peaceful spirit, which [is not anxious or wrought up, but] is very precious in the sight of God. For it was thus that the pious women of old who hoped in God were [accustomed] to beautify themselves and were submissive to their husbands [adapting themselves to them as themselves secondary and dependent upon them]. It was thus that Sarah obeyed Abraham [following his guidance and acknowledging his headship over her by] calling him Lord (master, leader, authority). And you are now her true daughters if you do right and let nothing terrify you [not giving way to hysterical fears or letting anxieties unnerve you]. -1Peter 3: 1-6 (AMP)
The instructions here are very profound, yet simple and well spelled out.
I want to admit it won’t come naturally to obey this. You will only obey when you give heart to it, study it and spend time meditating on it, study every word and prayerful soak them onto your spirit.
I pray God grants us strength to be doers and not hearers only deceiving ourselves.
God bless your marriage
CONFESSION FOR THE DAY I am a wise wife, I obey the scriptures, and I honour my husband
PRAYER FOR THE DAY Lord, please work on my heart not to reject your word at any point in time
THOUGHT FOR THE DAY
Wives, in the same way be submissive to your husbands so that, if any of them do not believe the word, they may be won over without words by the behavior of their wives, 2 when they see the purity and reverence of your lives. 3 Your beauty should not come from outward adornment, such as braided hair and the wearing of gold jewelry and fine clothes. -1 Peter 3:1-3 (NIV)
Let’s look at this scripture below well. We will see the faith process. Whether you are believing God for babies, contract, prosperity, or general well-being the process of faith must be completed.
For verily I say unto you, That whosoever shall say unto this mountain, Be thou removed, and be thou cast into the sea; and shall not doubt in his heart, but shall believe that those things which he saith shall come to pass; he shall have whatsoever he saith. –Mark 11:23 (KJV)
Let me analyze the faith process here.
1. You must speak to your mountain. Don’t speak about it, speak to it. Address it because you have authority.
2. Speak and give direction to the mountain.
3. Don’t allow doubt in your heart.
4. Believe that you have what you SAY.
5. Then, You will have what you say.
6. Thank God in advance. The faith process is not complete until you thank God by faith for your answers.
The big question is, what are you saying about the situation you are trusting God to see changes?
Do you pray? Declare God’s word and then begin to worry?
Its time as believers to begin to exercise our faith against the attacks of the enemy. Any issue the enemy brings our way is an attack on our faith.
We can deal with the enemy by exercising our faith.
Above all, taking the shield of faith, wherewith ye shall be able to quench all the fiery darts of the wicked. –Ephesians 6:16 (KJV)
With our shield of faith we quench every fiery darts the wicked one throws at us.
When we have issues in our marriage, issues with our spouse, or our in-laws, it is not the person that is the issue. It is the wicked one stirring up issues to steal your joy, peace, prosperity and health.
Rise up in the authority of the Lord and hold up the shield of faith against the fiery darts of the wicked one. There is victory on the other side of faith.
God bless your marriage in Jesus name.
CONFESSION FOR THE DAY I have faith in God, my words align with what I believe God for
PRAYER FOR THE DAY Pray and ask God to give the grace to be steadfast in faith
THOUGHT FOR THE DAY For therein is the righteousness of God revealed from faith to faith: as it is written, The just shall live by faith. –Romans 1:17 (KJV)
