As a single man or lady, you sometimes are all about yourself alone. Certain decisions are made without considering anyone. When you get married, that narrative will change. Whatever you do, you put your spouse first.
What to eat, what to wear, when to return home, where to go, how much to spend, what to buy, etc.
When taking such decisions, you will have to consider your partner.
Mk 10:8 [ESV] and the two shall become one flesh.’ So they are no longer two but one flesh.
2. Forgiveness.
There is no place where offence is frequent other than marriage. The reason is clear. You get hurt by the one you love so dearly.
Marriage is not a place to keep malice. As a matter of fact, in marriage, you forgive ahead.
Who do you think can offend you 490 times in a day?
Who? Your spouse. You don’t believe, right? Ask a married person beside you.
Mat 18v22 [NIV] Jesus answered, “I tell you, not seven times, but seventy-seven times.
3. Assumptions.
Assumption is the lowest level of knowledge. In marriage, couples don’t just make babies; they talk.
They talk about everything.
What you discussed in courtship, you discuss again in marriage. Life happens, and seasons change, so the conversation you had last year may need to be revisited this year.
The moment communication dies, assumptions set in.
You can’t live your life based on hearsay. Always ask.
Oh, I am not the talking type. Really? And you want to get married?
If you don’t talk to your spouse, someone else will do the talking.
Gen 3:1 [ESV] Now the serpent was more crafty than any other beast of the field that the LORD God had made. He said to the woman, “Did God actually say, ‘You shall not eat of any tree in the garden’?”
4. Teamwork.
Marriage is not a competition where you want to find out who the better parent is. You are a team. It is both of you against the world, not against each other.
You don’t have to always have the final say; that’s why you are a team.
Carry him along. Carry her along. That way, it will take extra effort for anyone to come between you.
I am an independent person. I like to do things my own way. That is very good for your level, but the moment you agree to sign the dotted lines, that mentality has to change.
Gen 2v24 [NLT] This explains why a man leaves his father and mother and is joined to his wife, and the two are united into one.
There are a few things that add spice into your marriage. Apart from praying and doing all the spiritual aspects, the things you do physically matters too.
We need to remind ourselves of some of these things. They are so simple; in fact, some of us vowed to do these things while single, but life happens to us, and then we get overcome by events.
There is no way you can start doing these things and stay committed to doing them that your marriage will not be better and grow intimately.
Let’s take a look at some of those things.
1. Take time to touch daily
a. Hugs – aim at 3-4 hugs per day for atleast 20sec
b. Hold hands for at least 10 mins per day
c. Cuddles – at least 30 mins everyday
d. Massage – at least 10-15 min per day
e. Intimate touch – kissing, caressing & lovemaking.
Physical touch reduces stress and anxiety. Oxytocin release hormones of bonding. It promotes feelings of attachment, closeness & bonding
2. Find something to laugh about daily
a. Schedule laughing time – Set aside time to see a movie
b. Find the humor, laugh at yourself
c. Be playful – playful activities & games that bring laughter & joy in your relationship
d. Share funny stories: funny stories about your past.
These tips are simple yet practical and profound.
God bless our marriages in Jesus’ mighty name, amen.
Imagine you’re at a dinner table, having a deep and meaningful conversation with someone you love. The atmosphere is just right, the emotions are real, and everything feels perfect. But have you ever stopped to ask, Is God even invited to this table?
A lot of people trust God with their careers, finances, health, provision, etc but when it comes to relationships, they like to take matters into their own hands. They pray, “Lord, bless this relationship,” but deep down, they already know they didn’t ask Him before getting into it.
The first relationship in the Bible didn’t start with two people finding each other rather it started with one person walking with God. Before Adam ever met Eve, he had a personal relationship with God (Genesis 2:18-22). That means before you start thinking about who to date or marry, the real question is: Where does God stand in your life?
Not every relationship that feels right is from God. Samson thought Delilah was everything he wanted, but in the end, that love story cost him his strength, his vision, and his purpose (Judges 16). If emotions are leading you instead of God, you might be walking into something that looks good but is quietly pulling you away from Him.
Here’s a reality check: If you have to constantly justify red flags, hide certain things from people who care about you, or feel spiritually drained, that’s not God’s best for you. Relationships built on compromise never stand the test of time.
Ask yourself these questions: Did I really invite God into this relationship, or did I just hope He would go along with my choice? Is this relationship helping me grow in my faith, or is it quietly pulling me away? If I had to stand before God today, would I feel good about how I’ve handled this relationship? Your honest answers will tell you a lot. If you’re drifting further from God instead of getting closer to Him, maybe it’s time to pause, reevaluate, and let Him take the lead.
“Behold, I stand at the door and knock. If anyone hears my voice and opens the door, I will come in and eat with that person, and they with me.” — Revelation 3:20 (NIV)
At the end of the day, marriage is too important to get wrong. A relationship without God is like driving without direction, you might feel like you’re moving forward, but you have no idea where you’ll end up. Before you let someone sit at the table of your heart, make sure God is the One who set the table in the first place. If He’s not in it then it’s not worth it.
Loneliness is a powerful feeling. Like desperation, it can make people settle for less—for relationships they know aren’t right. They do this just to fill the empty space in their hearts. However, if you make a decision based on loneliness, it will often lead to premium tears—your temporary fix causing you long-term pain.
Sometimes we mix it up, but get it straight now. God didn’t propose marriage to Adam because he was lonely. No! There’s a world of difference between being alone and being lonely.
“And the Lord God said, ‘It is not good that man should be alone; I will make him a helper comparable to him.’” Genesis 2:18 [NKJV]
A man can be alone, but not lonely. Another man can be married to a woman, yet lonely. “Being alone” means being singular—be it physically, in an assignment or project, etc. while “being lonely” is a void in the heart—a feeling of emptiness in the soul that is often caused by a lack of active participation in purpose.
Adam was too busy with what God had committed into his hands to do that he didn’t even have time to be lonely. He was alone but not lonely. God had to come to initiate marriage when he saw that Adam needed a helper.
For singles, the temptation to say “Maybe this is the best I can get” often springs from loneliness. Seeing others in relationships makes matters worse, making you feel like time is running out. That’s desperation. But don’t let the feeling of loneliness and desperation push you into something unhealthy. It’s better to wait alone than to walk into a relationship that steals your peace, your values, or your destiny. The wrong relationship will drain you much more than loneliness ever could.
For married couples, well, you can be married and still be lonely. Loneliness can still creep in—especially when communication is broken down or when life gets overwhelming. However, the solution isn’t to withdraw, seek emotional validation elsewhere, or compare your spouse to others. The solution is to fight for your marriage to thrive again—work towards reconnecting. Talk. Pray together. Block out every channel (the opposite gender) that gives you emotional satisfaction. Remember why you chose each other. And fight to reconnect.
A good marriage is not built on constant excitement; it’s built on commitment through every season. Commit to working on your marriage. Commit to fighting for the spark to return again. Sometimes, or most times, it starts with just one of the spouses. If it’s you, then don’t get discouraged. Keep your eyes on the goal, regardless of what you see on the way. Don’t allow loneliness to last. Don’t allow it to lead you into an emotional affair and, ultimately, a full-blown affair.
Ultimately, may we all always recognize that God is always present with us, so we can draw strength from Him.
“Do not fear, for I am with you.” Isaiah 41:10.
God is always present, even in seasons when you feel lonely. So, instead of making hasty decisions out of desperation as singles, trust that His timing is perfect. While waiting, keep active with your purpose. The right love—one that honors God—will come. And if you’re married, the love you already have can be strengthened.
In Ephesians 5:22-33, the Apostle Paul provides profound guidance on marriage that reflects Christ’s relationship with the Church. For husbands, the call is clear: “Husbands, love your wives, just as Christ loved the church and gave Himself up for her” (Ephesians 5:25).
This command challenges men to lead not through authority or control but through sacrificial love—a love so deep it mirrors Jesus’ ultimate sacrifice on the cross. Loving your wife means putting her needs above your own, serving her with humility, and nurturing an environment where she can flourish spiritually, emotionally, and physically.
For wives, Paul writes, “Wives, submit yourselves to your own husbands as you do to the Lord” (Ephesians 5:22). Submission here does not imply inferiority or blind obedience; rather, it reflects trust in God’s design for order within the home.
Just as the Church submits to Christ’s leadership, a wife’s submission involves respecting and supporting her husband’s role while trusting God to guide their shared journey.
It’s important to note this mutual submission is rooted in love—both partners are called to honor one another out of reverence for Christ (Ephesians 5:21).
These roles might seem challenging, even counter-cultural, yet they point us back to the Gospel. Husbands are reminded that true leadership looks like laying down your life—not demanding respect but earning it by loving selflessly.
Wives are encouraged to embrace submission not out of fear but from faith, trusting God’s wisdom in His design for unity and harmony.
Ultimately, these instructions aren’t about power dynamics but about reflecting God’s love story.
When husbands love sacrificially and wives submit respectfully, they create a picture of Christ’s covenantal love for His bride, the Church. As Colossians 3:14 reminds us, “And over all these virtues put on love, which binds them all together in perfect unity.”
Let us pray for marriages to reflect this divine model—that homes may be places of grace, joy, and testimony to God’s unchanging love.
Whether you’re a husband striving to love well or a wife seeking to submit faithfully, remember that God equips you to fulfill His purpose when you walk in obedience to Him.
