As a single man or lady, you sometimes are all about yourself alone. Certain decisions are made without considering anyone. When you get married, that narrative will change. Whatever you do, you put your spouse first.
What to eat, what to wear, when to return home, where to go, how much to spend, what to buy, etc.
When taking such decisions, you will have to consider your partner.
Mk 10:8 [ESV] and the two shall become one flesh.’ So they are no longer two but one flesh.
2. Forgiveness.
There is no place where offence is frequent other than marriage. The reason is clear. You get hurt by the one you love so dearly.
Marriage is not a place to keep malice. As a matter of fact, in marriage, you forgive ahead.
Who do you think can offend you 490 times in a day?
Who? Your spouse. You don’t believe, right? Ask a married person beside you.
Mat 18v22 [NIV] Jesus answered, “I tell you, not seven times, but seventy-seven times.
3. Assumptions.
Assumption is the lowest level of knowledge. In marriage, couples don’t just make babies; they talk.
They talk about everything.
What you discussed in courtship, you discuss again in marriage. Life happens, and seasons change, so the conversation you had last year may need to be revisited this year.
The moment communication dies, assumptions set in.
You can’t live your life based on hearsay. Always ask.
Oh, I am not the talking type. Really? And you want to get married?
If you don’t talk to your spouse, someone else will do the talking.
Gen 3:1 [ESV] Now the serpent was more crafty than any other beast of the field that the LORD God had made. He said to the woman, “Did God actually say, ‘You shall not eat of any tree in the garden’?”
4. Teamwork.
Marriage is not a competition where you want to find out who the better parent is. You are a team. It is both of you against the world, not against each other.
You don’t have to always have the final say; that’s why you are a team.
Carry him along. Carry her along. That way, it will take extra effort for anyone to come between you.
I am an independent person. I like to do things my own way. That is very good for your level, but the moment you agree to sign the dotted lines, that mentality has to change.
Gen 2v24 [NLT] This explains why a man leaves his father and mother and is joined to his wife, and the two are united into one.
There are a few things that add spice into your marriage. Apart from praying and doing all the spiritual aspects, the things you do physically matters too.
We need to remind ourselves of some of these things. They are so simple; in fact, some of us vowed to do these things while single, but life happens to us, and then we get overcome by events.
There is no way you can start doing these things and stay committed to doing them that your marriage will not be better and grow intimately.
Let’s take a look at some of those things.
1. Take time to touch daily
a. Hugs – aim at 3-4 hugs per day for atleast 20sec
b. Hold hands for at least 10 mins per day
c. Cuddles – at least 30 mins everyday
d. Massage – at least 10-15 min per day
e. Intimate touch – kissing, caressing & lovemaking.
Physical touch reduces stress and anxiety. Oxytocin release hormones of bonding. It promotes feelings of attachment, closeness & bonding
2. Find something to laugh about daily
a. Schedule laughing time – Set aside time to see a movie
b. Find the humor, laugh at yourself
c. Be playful – playful activities & games that bring laughter & joy in your relationship
d. Share funny stories: funny stories about your past.
These tips are simple yet practical and profound.
God bless our marriages in Jesus’ mighty name, amen.
Five Qualities a Husband Cannot Resist from His Wife
Marriage is one of God’s most beautiful designs, meant to reflect the love and unity between Christ and His Church (Ephesians 5:25-33). While every relationship has its unique dynamics, there are certain qualities a husband cannot resist from his wife that can strengthen their bond and glorify God. These qualities aren’t about striving for perfection but about cultivating godly character that honors both your spouse and the Lord.
1. Respectful Communication: One of the top qualities a husband cannot resist from his wife is respectful communication. Proverbs 18:21 reminds us, “The tongue has the power of life and death.” Speaking with kindness, patience, and respect—even during disagreements—creates an atmosphere of trust and understanding. Men feel deeply valued when they are respected, and the Scripture encourages wives to honor their husbands as leaders (1 Peter 3:7).
2. Gentle Spirit: Another quality a husband cannot resist in his wife is a gentle spirit. The Bible says, “A gentle answer turns away wrath” (Proverbs 15:1). A calm and peaceful demeanor fosters harmony in the home, even amid challenges. 1 Peter 3:4 highlights this inner beauty, describing it as “of great worth in God’s sight.”
3. Faithfulness to God: A wife who prioritizes her relationship with Christ inspires her husband in ways nothing else can. Faithfulness to God is a quality a husband cannot resist from his wife because it strengthens the spiritual foundation of their marriage. Joshua 24:15 calls families to serve the Lord wholeheartedly, and a godly wife leads by example.
4. Supportive Partnership: Husbands long for partners who believe in them and support their God-given vision. Ecclesiastes 4:9-10 illustrates the power of two working together: “If either of them falls down, one can help the other up.” This supportive partnership is another irresistible quality a husband finds in his wife.
5. Joyful Presence: Finally, a joyful presence is a quality a husband cannot resist from his wife. Proverbs 31:25 describes a virtuous woman whose “joy is her strength.” Her laughter and positivity make her husband feel loved and cherished.
These qualities aren’t about perfection but about pursuing Christlike character. As wives grow in these areas, they not only bless their husbands but also glorify God.
I pray for you: your marriage will reflect the unbreakable bond between Christ and His Bride—the Church.
Marriage is one of life’s most significant commitments, and it requires careful preparation, self-awareness, and a strong foundation. Before jumping into this lifelong partnership, it’s essential to assess whether you’re truly ready emotionally, spiritually, and practically. Below is a quiz designed to help you reflect on your readiness for marriage. Answer honestly, and use the results as a guide for further growth.
1. Do You Have a Deep Relationship with God?
Marriage should be grounded in faith, especially for Christians. A strong relationship with God equips you to navigate challenges, make wise decisions, and prioritize love over selfish desires. If you feel distant from God or unsure about His role in your life, consider investing more time in prayer, Bible study, and spiritual growth before committing to marriage.
2. Can You Communicate Effectively?
Healthy communication is the cornerstone of any successful marriage. Are you able to express your thoughts, feelings, and needs clearly? Can you listen actively without becoming defensive? Misunderstandings and unresolved conflicts can strain relationships, so mastering communication skills is crucial before tying the knot.
3. Are You Emotionally Mature?
Emotional maturity means understanding and managing your emotions while showing empathy toward others. Do you handle stress well? Can you take responsibility for your actions and apologize when necessary? Emotional immaturity can lead to unhealthy patterns in marriage, such as blaming, controlling behavior, or avoiding tough conversations.
4. Do You Know Yourself Well?
Self-awareness is vital for building a healthy marriage. Are you clear about your values, goals, strengths, and weaknesses? Do you understand what you bring to the table—and where you might need improvement? Knowing yourself helps ensure that you enter marriage as a whole person, not someone seeking completeness through another.
5. Are You Financially Responsible?
Money is one of the leading causes of conflict in marriages. Do you have a basic understanding of budgeting, saving, and financial planning? Are you free from excessive debt or reckless spending habits? While no one expects perfection, being financially responsible demonstrates maturity and readiness to manage household responsibilities together.
6. Have You Resolved Past Hurts?
Unresolved issues from past relationships or family dynamics can resurface in marriage if left unaddressed. Have you worked through any lingering pain, trauma, or bitterness? Healing these areas ensures that you don’t carry unnecessary baggage into your new life together.
7. Do You Share Core Values with Your Partner?
While differences can enrich a relationship, core values like faith, family, career, and lifestyle priorities must align for long-term harmony. Do you and your partner share similar beliefs about raising children, finances, and commitment to God? Compatibility in these areas lays a solid foundation for lasting love.
In conclusion, if you answered “yes” to most of these questions, congratulations—you’re likely ready for marriage! However, if some areas need improvement, take the time to grow and prepare. Remember, entering marriage prematurely can lead to unnecessary struggles. Trust God’s timing, and invest in yourself and your relationship. After all, a successful marriage isn’t just about finding the right person—it’s also about being the right person.
Marriage is a beautiful journey, but it also brings its own unique set of experiences and lessons that singles might not fully comprehend until they embark on their own path. While being single provides freedom and opportunities for personal growth, married life introduces new dimensions of love, sacrifice, and collaboration. Here are five things couples may be aware of that singles might not yet fully grasp:
1. The Beauty (and Challenge) of Compromise In marriage, two people become one, which means learning to give and take on everything from chores to where to go on vacation. Singles can make decisions all by themselves, but in a relationship, both partners have to think about each other’s needs and wants. This can be tough sometimes, but it also makes you and your partner closer and more united. Through compromise, couples grow together and learn how to put their goals first over their own wants.
2. The Depth of Emotional Intimacy
Singles can have deep friendships or romantic connections, but there’s something special about the emotional bond between spouses. Marriage takes a lot of vulnerability, trust, and being open with each other. Over time, this intimacy grows as couples share happy times, tough times, and even the little things that happen every day. It’s a level of closeness that really makes your heart and soul feel strong, because you both promise to love and support each other.
3. The Power of Grace and Forgiveness
Even if you’re head over heels in love with your partner, disagreements are bound to happen. What makes marriages truly special is the ability to show grace and forgiveness over and over again. Singles might find it easier to let go of grudges because their relationships aren’t as deeply connected. But in marriage, patience and mercy become superpowers that keep the peace and harmony flowing. As the Bible says in Ephesians 4:32, “Be kind and forgiving to each other, just as Christ forgave you.””
4. The Selfless Act of Marriage Marriage is a beautiful journey that teaches couples to prioritize each other. Whether it’s staying up late to comfort a loved one or giving up a hobby to spend quality time together, selflessness becomes a natural part of their lives. For singles, life is all about personal goals, but marriage shifts the focus toward serving and supporting another person. This act of surrender is a powerful reminder of Christ’s example of sacrificial love.
5. The Joy of Building a Legacy Together Marriage is a beautiful journey of creating a legacy together. It’s not just about building a family, a home, and a community, but about creating something meaningful that stands the test of time. From raising our little ones to serving others, we find immense joy in co-creating God’s plan for our lives. And let’s not forget the dreamers out there! While they may dream of this future, married couples live it every day, knowing they’re part of something extraordinary.
Singleness has its perks, but marriage is like a treasure trove of experiences that mold your character, strengthen your faith, and show you how God meant for us to connect. Both life stages have their ups and downs, but marriage shows you the true meaning of love, the sacrifices we make, and the beauty of unity that only those who’ve been on this journey can truly appreciate.
