We live in a world where standing up for what’s right can often lead to mockery. Staying chaste has suddenly become old-fashioned. Integrity is gradually disappearing from the body of Christ. I can only imagine the challenges Daniel must have faced from his people. They ridiculed him, laughing at his convictions and calling him foolish. They must have wondered who would reject the King’s food and wine.
Daniel and his companions were in a foreign land, victims of war. No pastors or fellowship coordinators were watching over them. No one would correct them if they strayed. No parents to guide or direct them in the place where they found themselves. They were far from home, far from their mentors and spiritual leaders, with nothing to lose.
Yet, the Bible tells us that Daniel made a firm decision in his heart to be different. He decided to uphold his foundation.
Daniel 1:8 (ERV) But Daniel purposed in his heart that he would not defile himself with the king’s meat, nor with the wine which he drank: therefore he requested of the prince of the eunuchs that he might not defile himself.
It all begins in the heart. As we’ve heard before, no miracle happens on the altar. If you are bitter and selfish as a single person, marriage won’t change that—it will just magnify those traits. If your heart is not in the right place when you’re single, you’ll carry that same misalignment into marriage.
This is why Proverbs warns us about the “strange woman” and the “wicked man”, those whose lips speak deceitfulness. This is why you cannot allow “hot legs” or “deep voice” to be your leading factor in asking for or giving a YES. What is the state of his/her heart?
There will come a time when you’ll be far from the watchful eyes of those who usually guide and encourage you. A season will come when, like Daniel, you’ll be in unfamiliar territory. The question is: when that moment arrives, will you compromise, or will you stand firm in your values? Will the wind blow you away, because of a weak foundation?
Where you place your trust and who you trust matters significantly. It plays a crucial role in determining whether the “trust” will ultimately save you or not.
Men put their trust in different things and sources. But I love what the Bible says,
Psa 20:7-8 (KJV) Some trust in chariots, and some in horses: but we will remember the name of the LORD our God. [8] They are brought down and fallen: but we are risen, and stand upright.
We are unlike those who rely on chariots or horses, but rather we will remember the name of our Lord, our God. In essence, our trust lies in the name of the Lord!
Isn’t that powerful?
That verse says they will be defeated, but because our trust is not in chariots or horses, but in the name of the Lord, we will rise and stand upright!
I can place my complete trust in Him in every aspect of my life, including relationships, weddings, marriage, jobs, careers, business, ministry, and all other areas.
Why should I place my trust in the name of the Lord? What is the assurance?
Let’s examine this.
Psa 28:7-8 (AMPC) The Lord is my Strength and my [impenetrable] Shield; my heart trusts in, relies on, and confidently leans on Him, and I am helped; therefore my heart greatly rejoices, and with my song will I praise Him. [8] The Lord is their [unyielding] Strength, and He is the Stronghold of salvation to [me] His anointed.
Wow! According to the scripture above, that strength is impenetrable and unyielding. Moreover, the scripture states that because I trust in Him, I am helped!
This year, God will indeed help you!
So much so that your heart will rejoice greatly!
You will praise Him in your songs because of the benefits you will accrue from trusting Him!
There is one key that I know works for every relationship. It works on the principle of being proactive rather than reactive.
When you are proactive, you are intentional, and that’s what we all have to do in our relationship. Every relationship has benefits to offer. God created man not to be an island but to leverage relationships in such a way that your weakness finds strength in the other person or partner.
Our relationships offer a complimentary advantage. One can only chase 1,000, while two will put 10,000 to flight.
Being proactive in relationships involves taking initiative, showing responsibility, and consistently making efforts to strengthen the bond. It also involves not allowing the weaknesses of others to determine your actions or feelings.
Many people have a hard time coping with the inadequacies of their partners. Their response to their partner is based on whatever their partner does.
Our response should be based on our core values, understanding of our purpose, and that of our relationship.
Anytime we are proactive rather than reactive, we become the bigger person- walking in love as against rendering evil for evil and tit for tat.
Let this be your rule in whatever relationship you are in.
The Song of Songs, a book of love and intimacy, opens with such profound lines that I would love to present to you today.
“Let him kiss me with the kisses of his mouth: For thy LOVE IS BETTER THAN WINE.” Song of Solomon 1:2 KJV
This verse captures a strong intimacy between the bride and her groom. There was an intense desire for one another locked up in the hearts of these lovers. This verse should, however, not just be read with the physical sensual passion in mind, but with the wholistic view of intimacy. You can’t even achieve the highest pleasure on the bed as a couple if you are not intimate outside the bedroom. So intimacy goes beyond the activities in the bedroom.
Intimacy is about how he is thoughtful about you and things concerning you. Intimacy is about how you occupy her heart. Intimacy is in those cares and little acts of kindness. Intimacy is in how nothing else competes with you in his heart, where your love is indeed better than wine. Intimacy is in how you look out for one another. It’s in those random calls to say, “I was just thinking of you.”
My dear couples, do you have this burning intimacy between you and your spouse? No? Then it’s something to begin to strongly desire, pray for, and work toward. Marriage was designed for this kind of beauty.
My dear singles, that one professing love for and to you, do you really weigh in his/her heart? Or are you simply a makeshift? Are you Someone he/she is just settling for because age is no longer a friend? Wash your eyes and marry well, my dear.
“Let him kiss me with the kisses of his mouth: For thy LOVE IS BETTER THAN WINE.”
Kai… I can’t seem to get over this. There is really something strong going on here.
What the bride was simply saying here is: Our love is intoxicating. Our love for each other is better than any other thing.
Their hearts were strongly locked in desire for one another.
Dear couple, don’t settle for less.
Not by constantly nagging your spouse, but by intentionally becoming an intimate partner while gently nudging your spouse. Plant that random kiss. Send that random text message that says “I care,” or “I’m thinking about you.” Be thoughtful and secretly buy that thing for your spouse and gift him/her.
Dear single, don’t settle for less.
Marriage is meant to be beautiful, so don’t settle for someone who doesn’t value you. Become that person who intentionally loves and doesn’t settle for one who is not. The LORD has someone amazing for you too; but if you don’t break up with the one occupying space, how will you receive the one God has for you?
God’s love for us is unconditional and immeasurable, yet it calls for a response. It is not just a gift to be received, but a call to action and a challenge to respond in a way that reflects His love.
John 3:16: For God so loved the world, that He gave His only begotten Son, that whosoever believeth in Him should not perish, but have everlasting life.
Imagine the pain of loving someone deeply and passionately, only to have that love ignored or rejected. That’s the heartache God experiences when we fail to respond to His love. His sacrifice on the cross wasn’t just an act of mercy but an invitation to engage in a transformative relationship with Him.
How do we respond to such an overwhelming love?
1. By Leading a Life of Obedience
Loving God starts with obedience. Jesus says in
John 14:21 Whoever has my commands and keeps them is the one who loves me.
Obedience reflects our intimate relationship with God. When we know Him deeply, we wouldn’t want to hurt Him. On the contrary, disobedience reveals a lack of closeness. Loving God is more than just avoiding sin. It means living according to His will and reflecting His heart in our everyday actions.
2. By Honoring Him With Our Substance
Honor goes beyond words; it shows in how we give and prioritize God. Proverbs 3:9-10 teaches us to honor God with our wealth. Honoring God encompasses all areas of life, not just about money. Your time, talents, and resources should reflect your value for God. Honoring God also means respecting the spiritual leaders He has placed in your life (2 Chronicles 20:20).
3. By Glorifying Him Through Fruitfulness
God calls us to be fruitful.
John 15:8 This is to my Father’s glory, that you bear much fruit, showing yourselves to be my disciples.”
Fruitfulness is more than achievements; it’s living a life that points others to God. Our actions, character, and choices should bring Him glory, showing the world that we are His disciples.
Understanding how to respond to God’s love changes everything about us, including how we navigate relationships, whether single or married. We must not just acknowledge His love. We must live in a way that shows we have been changed by it.
Take a moment to reflect on how you are responding to His love today!
