I Want To Apologize! Today is our 23rd wedding anniversary! God has been good! It has been an interesting journey! There have been ups and downs, but God has taken all the glory all the way! It has been stormy, windy, and dusty, but we are still here, serving the Lord, joyfully and tenaciously holding on to the call.
This morning, I want to apologize!
It’s been 23 years! God is good!
Wow, Pastor has done something really terrible? Well, we’ll see! You love “jist” and you want to know what Pastor has done? See how you are glued to your phone and reading with all rapt attention! lol… sometimes your spouse needs that kind of attention!
This morning, I want to quickly address married couples and singles! I want to bring out some choice words from the intricacies of my heart this morning as we take the 23rd floor of the marital mansion!
Back to my apology! I want to apologize to all the wives on KHC and beyond…
To all the wives, I want to apologize on behalf of your husband. I know some of you are hurt, oh…hurt is an understatement. Deeply hurt and intensely too. You’ve been keeping on the appearances, just going through the religious and domestic motions…but very disappointed and lacking energy within. Hurt and bitter. It’s just that you can’t get better by being bitter! You’ve attempted to cover the tears with powder and pomade. I want to say sorry! You have hibernated into your shell and withdrawn your affection! Sorry! Perhaps, you have begun or beginning to channel your thoughts to another…hey! It’s a trap to entangle your soul!
To all husbands, I want to apologize on behalf of your wives! She may not even know she has offended you, but you are withdrawn emotionally and just acting alone. You are succumbing to the trap of the stranger’s bosom gradually! Hey! It’s not the way to go! It’s the way of ruin! Focus only on her breasts…that is what you are covenanted to!
You have been disrespected and she doesn’t seem to understand! Sorry! You are the man! Brace up and give leadership by forgiving. Show the way by being faithful to the wife of your youth!
To all singles, I want to apologize to God! Many singles who are in “courtship” have deserted the “ship” and only “court” is left, courting disaster! Lord, I say sorry!
The bed has been desecrated, without remorse! It has become a form of greeting yourselves! This is not the faith handed over to us! Sex has become the sustenance of courtship, the spree is unending! Oral sex is the norm and you crave for the taste…how that is held confidently in private and microphone held in public day after day without a dint of repentance requires your pause, stop and return to the Almighty, for you have left Him for too long, and things go awry for those who leave Him!
Shall we enter the room of kinky sex and BDSM? Oh no, that is a forbidden area, akin to the evil forest of the olden days that no Homo Sapien is authorized to trudge!
Dear wife, he is sorry! Find a place for forgiveness, that you do not become headless!
Dear husband, she is sorry! Embrace her, and let her be your help and not your hell.
Dear singles, it’s time to say to your Lord and the lover of your soul, we are sorry! It’s time to make amendments and follow the book! God loves you and will forgive all misdemeanors and won’t even remember again upon repentance!
Let the turnaround begin in our relationships! Let the healing begin in our marriage! This is my prayer for you as we celebrate our 23rd anniversary today!
My family with the Ekines
May God bless you today and always! Don’t forget to share this devotional on Facebook, WhatsApp, and groups if it blesses you!
Conflict Resolution In Relationship And Marriage. George and Sally fell in love with each other. They were so happy, they knew God was in it. They had prayed, fasted, and involved their pastors along. They were so sure it is going to be a time of heaven on earth.
Sally had a lot of childhood expectations for herself and the love of her life. She had plans and had her imagination filled with how they would live together in courtship. To her greatest surprise, not too long into their courtship, they started having clashes.
George was insensitive with his words and often passed unpleasant jokes and comments about Sally. Sally on the other hand was being overly sensitive. This continued for a long time until they both began to contemplate going their separate ways.
It was a rude shock to Sally that despite being in the center of God’s will they still have issues. The problem is that she is not even sure what she is doing wrong. If she must save her courtship she must know how to handle issues between them.
She decided to write out the things they were doing wrong in their courtship. She came up with the following.
Conflict Resolution In Relationship And Marriage
They were shouting at each other.
They were accusing each other.
They were full of retaliation.
Rather than listen to one another, they would defend themselves.
They both wanted to win the argument.
They were fond of reporting one another.
They will keep malice for days and they both found it difficult to forgive and let go. After writing about all the problems they were facing in their relationship, She had a light bulb moment. Those were the things they should never do to each other. They must find a way to eliminate and handle the issues correctly.
On the other hand, the Johnsons have been married for three years and their marriage seems to go through high waters. They seem to argue over everything. It didn’t look like they went through courtship. Their differences seem so much and they don’t know how to manage them. Mrs. Johnson could not take any of these again, it was already affecting her health. They tried a few times to stop the incessant quarrels but soon they were back to square one.
There were times it got so bad, and other times they tried managing themselves. What could be wrong with us? She started to ask some questions. As she sat before me, I proffered some solutions to their issues. Here are some things she learned.
Conflict Resolution In Relationship And Marriage
Be positive. Think good of each other. Don’t assume.
Identify the problem. Do not muddle things up
Never attack your spouse. You’re a team.
Express your feelings in love. Be considerate
See any mistake as our mistake.
Never be too big to apologize.
Be prayerful and learn to talk to God
Seek a professional counselor, not a family member to help resolve the conflict.
With these tips, she and her husband are on their way to recovering their marriage. Mrs. Johnson was determined more than ever before to do everything in her path to enjoy bliss in her marriage.
In the same way, we must be determined to seek help and do all we can to ensure our marriage is great! Conflict Resolution In Relationship And Marriage
How To Understand That Special Gender. Mrs. Johnson has just arrived from the salon where she had gone to make her hair. Mr. Johnson is in the living room, relaxing and watching the Television.
Mrs. Johnson: (knocks on the door) Mr. Johnson: Who is that? Mrs. Johnson: My dear, it’s me! Mr. Johnson: (Stands up and opens the door, takes a look at his wife, and then his countenance changes)Mrs. Johnson: What is it dear? Mr. Johnson: What is this on your head? Mrs. Johnson: (She didn’t answer, but walked past) Mr. Johnson: What kind of useless hairstyle is this? Mrs. Johnson: But it’s fine now? Mr. Johnson: You have no mirror, right, this thing on your head that makes your head look like that of a chicken?
Well, Mr. Johnson thinks he is being blunt, but he is actually foolish and unwise. Now, this kind of conversation or communication will devastate any woman. It would even be worse if her love language is “words of affirmation.”
It is okay for Mr. Johnson not to like a particular hairstyle. But it is wisdom for him to have first looked at the many hours spent fixing that hair and appreciated that first. After a week or so, he can just give her some money and ask her to change her hairstyle. That is wiser, simpler, and would save the marriage.
What is the point of being in strife because of hairstyle? This is just one of many examples.
In the school of relationships and marriage, communication is the core curriculum. Communication is so important.
How To Understand That Special Gender. Now, there is no effective communication without a language. Even in non-verbal communication, there is “language”
Language is so important that it was the only thing that God needed to tamper with when the human race got ambitious and wanted to build a tower that would reach into the heavens.
God, Himself looked down and said these people are going to succeed because they have “one language”
“And the Lord said, Behold, they are one people and they have all one language; and this is only the beginning of what they will do, and now nothing they have imagined they can do will be impossible for them.” (Gen 11:6, AMP)
The only thing God could do to stop their ambition was to garble their language. And that was what He did. The moment they could not understand themselves, the project was impeded and subsequently suspended.
What does that tell you?
When you don’t speak the proper language, a relationship or marriage will have serious issues.
Good and constant communication is the oxygen that relationships and marriage need.
The tower of Babel came to a halt. God simply “scattered” their language.
However, at Pentecost, there was the restoration of languages.
“Then how is it that we hear, each of us, in our own (particular) dialect to which we were born?” (Act 2:8, AMP)
At Pentecost, they heard themselves in the languages they understood most!
From these, we can see how important languages can be even in the things of the Spirit, how much more in a love relationship?
If your fiancee’s or wife’s love language is words of affirmation, what it means is that she doesn’t really sense any love until you affirm her with words.
The moment you keep ignoring this language, she will never be happy. Love languages are like passwords, so learn to speak her love language.
The greatest mistake is to keep speaking the direct opposite of her love language, which is critical words!
When you keep on doing this carelessly, you will never have the best of her. You may not notice much in courtship, but in marriage, she will never be happy. And that will affect a lot of things.
How To Understand That Special Gender. God wants you to make each other happy. Whenever any of you is unhappy, it can affect or hinder your prayers.
In a relationship or marriage, ladies get hurt through “insignificant issues” These issues are insignificant to men, but they are pertinent issues to them.
A successful relationship or marriage is about understanding the other person and trying to please him or her without displeasing God. That is what makes it work.
If your fiancee’s or wife’s love language is words of affirmation, you have to go out of your way to speak her language.
I am sorry. God bless you. Thank you. You are beautiful You are the best. You are the greatest thing that has happened to me. You are God’s greatest gift to me. Anytime I think about you, I cannot but thank God for His favour on my life. Since I met you, my life has never been the same. You are a fresh breath into my life.
I love this food. You are so great at anything you do!
I once heard Dr. Albert Oduwole said that it takes nine affirming words from you before criticism can be well received! Learn from that.
Words mean a lot to women. Words are powerful.
“Pleasant words are as an honeycomb, sweet to the soul, and health to the bones.” (Pro 16:24, KJV)
But there are also words that can bring bitterness to a lady. Avoid speaking those words to your loved one! Be wise.
You are just stupid! You are a dunce! I regret the day I met you! You are a strange woman, you’ve brought bad luck into my life. You are so ugly, I am just managing you! And so on.
Those kinds of words will tear any relationship or marriage apart. It is a matter of time.
Find out what her love language is and keep speaking that language. It will eliminate a lot of unnecessary friction.
Read this slowly as I conclude this morning:
“The same goes for you husbands: Be good husbands to your wives. Honor them, delight in them. As women they lack some of your advantages. But in the new life of God’s grace, you’re equals. Treat your wives, then, as equals so your prayers don’t run aground. Summing up: Be agreeable, be sympathetic, be loving, be compassionate, be humble. That goes for all of you, no exceptions. No retaliation. No sharp-tongued sarcasm. Instead, bless—that’s your job, to bless. You’ll be a blessing and also get a blessing. Whoever wants to embrace life and see the day fill up with good, Here’s what you do: Say nothing evil or hurtful;” (1Pe 3:7-10, MSG)
Did you get blessed, go ahead and share! How To Understand That Special Gender
The Greatest Investment For Your Lover or Spouse. Sally and George talked into the night. The love between them was palpable. As they gazed away at the sky dotted with stars that seem to cooperate with their emotions, Sally turned and looked at George. George was expecting a kiss. At last, she was going to yield.
Thoughts raced through his mind. The earth seems to stand still. George has been transported away in the rapturous romantic setting as he imagined what it would be like locking lips with Sally…and he was enjoying it until his fantasy was rudely interrupted by a question from Sally,
He woke up from his fantasy adventure, rather disappointed.
“George, what do you think would be your greatest investment into my life?”
“Hmmm…”
George had no idea what response Sally wanted exactly and he didn’t want to say something that will douse the romantic fire of the night.
“It would be your quest for knowledge. It would be an ongoing investment in your mind! Sally said.
Chai! This girl doesn’t know the times and seasons at all! George thought!
He sheepishly nodded his head in agreement with what Sally said. “Yes, the mind!” He said.
The Johnsons, who got married a few years back have not been enjoying their marriage as they expected. They couldn’t place their hands on what could be wrong.
Rather than search for answers, they kept on blaming themselves. The quarrels became incessant.
The reality is that every couple comes into the marriage with their baggage. These items of baggage are filled with experiences, opinions, outlooks, and so on.
However, the place of marriage is a place of learning and unlearning!
You have to be open to knowing more and also realize that you don’t know a lot!
What is The Greatest Investment For Your Lover or Spouse?
It is your quest to know more that ensures you will keep working on your marriage, making adjustments, and investing heavily in knowing more! This is The Greatest Investment For Your Lover or Spouse
Who is that woman you are married to?
Who is that man you want to spend the rest of your life with?
Who is that guy you are walking the aisle with?
Who is that lady that will bear your children and be their mother?
How can you keep pleasing each other?
Like the scriptures says:
Pro 1:20-23 (AMPC) Wisdom cries aloud in the street, she raises her voice in the markets; [21] She cries at the head of the noisy intersections [in the chief gathering places]; at the entrance of the city gates she speaks: [22] How long, O simple ones [open to evil], will you love being simple? And the scoffers delight in scoffing and [self-confident] fools hate knowledge? [23] If you will turn (repent) and give heed to my reproof, behold, I [Wisdom] will pour out my spirit upon you, I will make my words known to you.
Wisdom is everywhere. They are in the books. They are encapsulated in people around you!
This is what Kisses and Huggs Club devotionals attempt to do. To daily bring the wisdom of God to you for your relationships and marriage! Bringing to you The Greatest Investment For Your Lover or Spouse on a daily basis
Make up your mind to invest in your relationship and marriage today! It is The Greatest Investment For Your Lover or Spouse
Spirituality And Reality Of Soul Ties. Sally and George have been engaged for only three months. But in the short time they were together, they could not remember as many times as they had been intimate. When they quarreled after three months, they parted ways and went differently.
Somehow they kept thinking of each other. They had moved on differently and each of them even have new relationships but they kept on thinking of each other.
What happened to them? Why couldn’t they move on? Spirituality And Reality Of Soul Ties
The Johnsons, on the other hand, married a few months back and have their issues as well. Mr. Johnson couldn’t enjoy intimacy with his wife without importing the thoughts and images of his exes. He would have to disconnect from his wife and reconnect in his mind to a certain ex before he can reach the crescendo.
What was his issue? Spirituality And Reality Of Soul Ties
Sexual intimacy is created by God for your enjoyment and to bring you closer to marriage. It is the highest level of knowing your spouse. God is so particular about it that He said you must not deny or defraud each other. In other words, satisfy each other.
As a matter of fact, when you starve each other of this great blessing that God has afforded you, you actually make yourselves vulnerable. And the devil is quick to set up such traps in offices and anywhere. So, married couples, learn to satisfy each other, that is exactly what God wants.
The issue that Mr.Johnson has is called soul ties with previous lovers.
For Sally and George, the reality is that they have what is called a “soul tie!”
This is what pre-marital intimacy does! How does this happen? Spirituality And Reality Of Soul Ties
In marriage, it brings a bonding between the couple, because that is one of the purposes of intimacy. It cements the couple and joins them together at the highest possible level. Their souls become knitted together. They become one. They are glued together, and God says nobody should put them asunder.
But in intimacy outside marriage, there is also a bonding. It is just that it is another kind of bonding. It is an illegal bonding that gives access to the operation of demonic entities in one’s life. It is called soul ties.
This is what the scripture is talking about here:
“Know ye not that your bodies are the members of Christ? shall I then take the members of Christ, and make them the members of an harlot? God forbid. What? know ye not that he which is joined to an harlot is one body? for two, saith he, shall be one flesh.” (1Co 6:15-16, KJV)
Can you see that?
In pre-marital intimacy, the two people also become one body! They are not married, but there is an illegal bonding that gives access to legal operations of demonic activities because of disobedience.
Message Translation puts it this way:
“There’s more to sex than mere skin on skin. Sex is as much spiritual mystery as physical fact. As written in Scripture, “The two become one.”” (1Co 6:16, MSG)
So we see that this is spiritual. As a matter of fact, when you get involved with someone, you are actually having intimacy with everybody that person has had intimacy with! It is not uncommon to see a person suddenly stealing after being intimate with someone that steals!
There is nothing like casual sex. Nothing is casual about it, it is spiritual. There is nothing like a one-night stand. One night stand can lead to an eternity of woes and damnation.
There is nothing like a quickie outside marriage. One quickie and one’s destiny can be quickly set back by five years or more!
This is just the reality! Spirituality And Reality Of Soul Ties
How do you break soul ties from past sexual mistakes?
1. Ask God to forgive you for the mistake 2. Repent and make up your mind not to do it again. 3. Fast and pray and ask God to severe every bonding and soul ties 4. Disconnect from such a person. Stop all the calls and chats 5. Psalm 23 says, “He restoreth my soul!” Ask God to restore your soul 6. Stop living in sin. Jesus told that woman, “Go and sin no more!” 7. Patiently wait for the salvation of God in your relationship. Don’t be hasty. Cooperate with God’s plan. 8. Believe that God has a plan for you and that the plan will become a reality. 9. Keep reading and studying God’s word. Your mind will be renewed over time. For example, if you can follow this devotional consistently, your mind will be renewed in this area and you will get to know a lot of things and be prepared for marriage and as married. A lot of people have testified to that.
I pray for you this morning that God will grant you more understanding.
Right now, I break every form of soul ties that may exist in Jesus’ name. I destroy every plan of hell over your destiny, I declare you free from consequences of past mistakes and I ask in the name of Jesus and by the power of the Holy Spirit that your soul be restored now to God’s desire for you as an individual and in your relationship/marriage….in Jesus name! Spirituality And Reality Of Soul Ties
