The Bible says husbands should enjoy the wife of their youth. This means you should enjoy yourself while you have strength as young couples. Don’t be too serious at home and learn to live together as best friends.
The force of joy is very vital in the home front. Joy, celebration, thanksgiving, rejoicing, the sound of melody, praises, and worship to God all go hand in hand.
Psa 67:5-6, KJV Let the people praise thee, O God; let all the people praise thee. Then shall the earth yield her increase; and God, even our own God, shall bless us.
We are encouraged in this scripture to praise the Lord, then our earth; whatever it is that represents the earth to us will yield her increase. Whether barrenness, lack, joblessness, debt, et cetera
The logical thing to do is get moody when things are not working. But we operate from a higher level. We rejoice to get the increase.
Your boss, spouse, or colleague may be treating you badly. Rather than fight back, you switch into praise.
Receive Grace and strength to enter into praise. God inhabits your praise. Your praise invites God to fight on your behalf.
Php 4:4 Rejoice in the Lord alway: and again I say, Rejoice.
Let nothing steal your joy. Let your rejoicing be in the Lord
Don’t allow the pressure of finances, raising children, in-laws and others destabilize your togetherness and joy.
Nothing must come in between your joy. Between the two of you, one person will be more playful and tend towards being joyful all the time.
Let the playful one take the initiative and the other follows suit.
The Holy Spirit knows what He’s saying when He says enjoy the wife of your youth.
Be deliberate in making each other happy. Do not make others outside your home or marriage happy at the expense of your spouse.
Read books together and discuss them. Invest in each other.
I pray your marriage will be beautiful and filled with new wine.
God bless your marriage.
CONFESSION FORTHE DAY I love my spouse and we enjoy life together
PRAYER FOR THE DAY Lord, help us to be joyful always.
THOUGHT FOR THE DAY Ecc 9:9 Live joyfully with the wife whom thou lovest all the days of the life of thy vanity, which he hath given thee under the sun, all the days of thy vanity: for that is thy portion in this life, and in thy labour which thou takest under the sun.
ACTION PLAN FOR THE DAY Rejoice and enjoy yourself
Talking about gratitude or being grateful, I think every couple should be overly grateful to their spouse. Not only is it for the woman to be grateful but also for the man. We all owe ourselves a lifetime of gratitude.
If not for anything, that he/she married you. You know how difficult it could be, being married to you. The times you threw tantrums, the times you were ‘mad’ (literally), the time you did not understand yourself, the time you were under pressure, the time you were in debt, the time when you were sick and all these times your spouse stood with and by you.
I think we all should throw a gratitude party and make our spouses the special guest of honour.
But instead, what do we have? A grateful wife and a complaining husband. I think we all should repent. If only we could change roles we would see that it has not been easy.
If the woman changes roles and becomes the man for a while and the man becomes the woman, we would appreciate our spouses more. The truth is that there is a lot of work in being either of the spouses. Let no one blow his/her own trumpet.
But I want to shed more light on how the wife can use gratitude as a weapon to win the battles on the home front. Well not really battles but more of confrontations.
All women have the tendencies to nag and complain. There are so many things the wife wants to change in her husband. She’s an emotional relational being and so sees all the wrong things her husband does.
The route of complaining and nagging will never work. If anything, it will make your husband battle-ready. The role of the wife is that of influence. Before you can adequately influence, you must have accepted him.
Acceptance comes with praise, gratitude, and thanksgiving. Be grateful first for the hundred thousand before complaining that he didn’t give you a million. Be grateful for the trash he threw out even though he didn’t mow the grass.
I can give so many examples and show us many opportunities we have to be grateful for. As a wife, let gratitude be your daily weapon. Let no day pass without you being grateful. Look for something to be grateful for and do it enthusiastically.
CONFESSION FOR THE DAY I will love for my spouse
PRAYER FOR THE DAY Lord, grant me more wisdom and grace in my marriage
THOUGHT FOR THE DAY Bless your fresh–flowing fountain! Enjoy the wife you married as a young man! Lovely as an angel, beautiful as a rose–– don’t ever quit taking delight in her body. Never take her love for granted! Why would you trade enduring intimacies for cheap thrills with a whore (Proverbs 5:18-20 Message)
ACTION PLAN FOR THE DAY Decide to settle all quarrels amicably
Yes, we need to take foreplay to another level. It is very possible to enjoy the other room in marriage
Foreplay is so relaxing, soothing, and rejuvenating. After such a tiring day, there is nothing as good as good love-making preceded by good foreplay.
I like the fact that it is therapeutic in nature. The release of hormones makes it a good medicine and it is also a good exercise.
I know some marriedcouples don’t have it as good. So I would like to address both husband and wife.
First, to those who are not really enjoying or having it regularly.
Whatever issue is causing you not to have regular love-making is demonic and an attack from the pit of hell. You cannot be married and be sleeping in different rooms. It’s simply unacceptable.
Such things as he snores, she snores, he has body odour or she has body odour are not enough reasons to abandon your spouse. What matters is that you are married, you two have become one flesh and nothing should separate you.
It is abnormal for a guy not to have it with his wife when he is not sick. For a man, it is more of releasing tension. Without regularity, he can’t really function as he should.
So see whatever is preventing you from having it in marriage as an attack. Address it ruthlessly. Don’t say you can handle it or you don’t care. Divorce and adultery are the consequences of such neglect.
If you have to plan it and do like a timetable, do it. The fire must never go down in the bedroom. When the fire goes down in the bedroom, the whole home catches fire.
It should be regular. For a very busy couple at least once or twice a week is okay.
To those of us who are enjoying it, we should try to improve. There is always room for improvement. Find creative ways to satisfy each other.
Take your foreplay to another level. Spend time with each other. Explore each other’s bodies. A healthy love life makes you more productive, more relaxed, and more focused. You will be more coordinated.
Create the right atmosphere that will make you enjoy yourself. If you can get away, plan it out. Go to a hotel or a resort center just by yourself. Just like we do sometimes. Leave the children with someone reliable and take time out to enjoy yourselves. When you come back, you will be refreshed and more relaxed than before you went.
God bless your marriage.
CONFESSION FOR THE DAY I give myself to my spouse
PRAYER FOR THE DAY Lord, help us in this area of life
THOUGHT FOR THE DAY 1Co 6:16 (MSG) (paraphrased)There’s more to it than mere skin on skin. It is as much spiritual mystery as physical fact. As written in Scripture, “The two become one.”
Have you ever been unresponsive to your husband’s playful advances? I have been several times. That was before I learned that part of my role as a wife is to be responsive to him and to be his playmate every time and any time.
Do I respond every time? No. I still consider my husband playful and don’t join, thankfully we have three boys who can play with him.
My husband sometimes considers me as being too serious. I never grew up with a sanguine in the house so having fun was not a regular thing. We were quiet in our family and our idea of fun was little laughter here and there.
My husband is not so much of a Sanguine but his Choleric tendencies have made him an extrovert at least to me. He seems quiet when he wants to but when he is in his rhyme, he really wants to talk and play.
Sometimes he wants to play, sing *winks*, be funny, talks, disturb me and all the rest. He is just full of energy and he wants to release some.
The one thing that men don’t leave behind from being boys is playing and having fun. They love to have fun and as their wives, you have to learn to have fun with them.
You may be pushing your husband out to look for a playmate. You must learn to be jovial. Be responsive to his jokes. Laugh with him. Laugh at him. Your role as his wife is not to stop him from playing, it is to play with him.
Don’t stop him from watching his football games or any other games, join him in. Don’t be too busy for him. I know you have a lot to do especially when you don’t have help. The idea is to let your husband occupy the first place and every other thing will find its place.
God bless your marriage
CONFESSION FOR THE DAY I am my husband’s playmate
PRAYER FOR THE DAY Help me Lord to cast my care upon you
THOUGHT FOR THE DAY Eph 5:23 (KJV) For the husband is the head of the wife, even as Christ is the head of the church: and he is the saviour of the body.
ACTION PLAN FOR THE DAY Be responsive to your husband’s play and jokes.
Words are powerful. Words are eternal. They don’t die.
Jesus said words are spirits.
Joh 6:63 KJV It is the spirit that quickeneth; the flesh profiteth nothing: the words that I speak unto you, they are spirit, and they are life.
Nations have gone to war because of words spoken and battles have been known to come to an end because of words.
Jesus also said that words reveal what is in a man’s heart.
Luk 6:45 AMP The upright (honorable, intrinsically good) man out of the good treasure [stored] in his heart produces what is upright (honorable and intrinsically good), and the evil man out of the evil storehouse brings forth that which is depraved (wicked and intrinsically evil); for out of the abundance (overflow) of the heart his mouth speaks.
You can decode a man’s attitude from his words. His words, when analysed will show you where he is going.
This morning, I want to show you a few words that men who claim to be your lover often say that show something is defective somewhere. They let you know that your relationship or marriage needs some attention and counsel. Here are a few of those statements that your lover may not be saying.
1. I am not a religious freak. I don’t like church stuffs. I can’t be a fanatic.
What he is really saying: I don’t want to be spiritual. I will not always go to church. I don’t believe in God that much. Once we are married, you will have to stop going to church as you do now.
The implication: Your spiritual life will be depleted. You will not be on the same page. Without a good foundation of spiritual life and relationship with God, you will be limited, you will do a lot of things with struggles and you will never be able to enter the fullness of God’s blessings for your life.
2. There is nothing wrong with sex as long as we love ourselves, although I am not insisting. Even pastors are messing up.
What he is really saying: I will soon get you. It is a matter of time. I will wait for you to get emotionally connected with me and fall in love hopelessly and then you won’t be able to say No. How will I be in a relationship without having sex? ‘You never know anything!’
The implication: His word already reveals his heart. If you stay in a relationship with such a person, you will soon compromise. It is just a matter of time. If you value your relationship with God, you will disconnect from any tiny appearance of compromise before you become entangled and fall in love.
3. Let’s keep our relationship to ourselves for now. I don’t want any pastor or parents to know. Don’t even tell too many of your friends for now. I am a private person and I don’t like being discussed all over the place. Let it just be between the two of us. When the time comes to go public, I will let you know.
What he is really saying: I don’t want to go all the way with you. I don’t want any commitments; all I want is sex! Let’s make the casualty to be only you and not involve any authority figure that will tie me down.
The implication: He will not walk the aisle with you. He is not interested in marriage and there is no point wasting a few of your years with him. A good courtship is not supposed to operate as a secret cult!
4. I really love you and that is why you are number one out of all my girlfriends. You are the one I want to get married to.
What he is really saying: I have other girlfriends that I sleep around with. Be careful so I won’t change my mind about you because I have so many of them in my hands.
The implication: He is manipulating you with that statement and he may not get married to you eventually. Even if he does, there would not be an automatic disconnection with his girlfriends especially if they are sexually involved. You will have to contend with that after marriage and practically fight battles that could have been avoided. As a child of God, you are to be loved and adored by your husband. The moment you are being threatened this way, something is not quite right. Don’t stay under a manipulative man; that is not God’s plan for you.
5. Even though, I am married, I don’t love my wife. I don’t know why I have not met you before I got married. You are my true wife. I will find a way to leave that woman and marry you. You are so caring, loving and I can do anything for you. Just stay with me, I will give you anything you want and I will marry you eventually.
What he is really saying: You think it is so easy to leave the mother of my children? You are just a baby, and I will keep on giving you paltry sums of money to get what I want. I will rent a house for you and buy you a car and I will visit you there for sex. The day you say you are no longer interested, I will collect my car and my house.
The implication:Adultery is not worth it. You will simply waste your youth and practically stop your life. It will look sweet initially but soon turns into gravel in your mouth. Disconnect from such relationships because God doesn’t want you there.
CONFESSION FOR THE DAY I am wise. I have a better understanding of my lover. I know what my lover is saying and not saying.
PRAYER FOR THE DAY Pray that God will show you what your lover is not saying.
THOUGHT FOR THE DAY It is the Spirit who gives life; the flesh is no help at all. The words that I have spoken to you are spirit and life. (John 6:63 ESV)
ACTION PLAN FOR THE DAY Review all your relationships and follow God’s instructions to find out what your lover is not saying.
