I will be taking us on a series and I believe it will help our marriages. The points I will be sharing with us are from a Whatsapp post. I will not just be giving us points but will be taking out time to discuss the points and how it affects our marriage.
If you can also discuss these points with your spouse or in a small group as we do on KHC women whatsapp group, it will be more effective.
Why do we have to build a happy and lasting Marriage? Because like any institution, marriage has the capacity to become old and obsolete. It is our responsibility to build into our marriage values that will keep it renewed.
Did you miss out on yesterday’s devotional, we’ve got you covered kindly go HERE. For KHC video Devotionals kindly go HERE
Like a machine, it has to be greased, oiled, serviced and its parts replaced or repaired. In marriage, no one knows it all. When the husband begins to think he is right all of the time and cannot be wrong, trouble is brewing.
We want to be sure the ingredients we are using to build our marriage can stand the test of time. We need to raise a standard of the blood of Jesus against all that is militating against our marriage, especially in this end times.
There are specific wisdom needed to build our homes and marriages which does not answer to the wisdom we have in business or in nation building or in leadership, although some principles do apply.
Let’s go into the points.
1. Understand each other.
This is huge in any marriage that will succeed and will last. It will be pride for a husband and wife to think that they know or fully understand their spouse.
Understanding your spouse is what you will never graduate from. Both spouses must be willing and ready to keep on understanding each other.
You are different and may never be the same forever. Respect the fact that you are individuals with strengths and weaknesses.
The marriage is as strong as you strengthen each other’s weaknesses when you respond and not react to each other.
Marriage is like the jigsaw puzzle, the puzzles are never the same but fit perfectly to form a beautiful picture which individually can never be formed.
I will stop here today. May God build with us and help us build lasting marriages in Jesus name. God bless our marriage
CONFESSION OF THE DAY I seek to understand my spouse
PRAYER FOR THE DAY Lord I receive grace to understand my spouse more
THOUGHT FOR THE DAY 1Pe 3:8 Finally, be ye all of one mind, having compassion one of another, love as brethren, be pitiful, be courteous
ACTION PLAN FOR THE DAY Be patient to understand your spouse
According to the Oxford English Dictionary, the word trust is defined as the firm belief in the reliability, truth, or ability of someone or something.
Relationships have to be built on trust.
The very core, basis, and foundation of the marriage covenant is trust. Once the trust is ruptured, there is virtually nothing that can be done or said.
If the foundations be destroyed, what can the righteous do? – Psa 11:3
Once trust is broken for whatever reason, what is left is suspicion. Suspicion in marriage is so dangerous. It leaves either of the parties a victim in his/her own matrimonial home.
To be suspicious is, ‘causing one to have the idea or impression that someone or something is questionable, dishonest or dangerous.’
Did you miss out on yesterday’s devotional, we’ve got you covered kindly go HERE. For KHC video Devotionals kindly go HERE
A marriage covenant is an oath or pledge between the couples to protect each other, help each other, defend each other, fight for each other, stand by each other, and much more.
In a covenant, the husband and wife are pledging to each other that your strength becomes my strength and your weaknesses become my weaknesses. I fight to defend your cause and I fight against your enemies. Your enemies are my enemies and your friends my friends.
Little wonder when God was cutting a covenant with Abraham he said
And I will bless them that bless thee, and curse him that curseth thee: and in thee shall all families of the earth be blessed. – Gen 12:3
When there is suspicion, the very foundation for the marriage covenant is broken.
When a husband or wife fails to trust his spouse, he may also have trust issues with God.
Lack of trust may be borne out of fear. Fear of the unknown, fear of losing your spouse, fear of infidelity, insecurities,
Another reason why suspicion is dangerous is that according to Job, what you fear, your open the door for the enemy to afflict. You literally open up your marriage to be oppressed by the devil.
For the thing which I greatly feared is come upon me, and that which I was afraid of is come unto me. – Job 3:25
Another basis for suspicion is a lack of genuine love and forgiveness. When you find it difficult to forgive whole-heartedly. You hold on to the past and make that the basis of your conduct in marriage.
To enjoy your marriage and to experience your strengths being multiplied, you need to trust one another and lift up each other in prayers.
It is my prayer that the Lord help us all to uproot seeds of suspicion in our marriages.
God bless our marriages.
CONFESSION FOR THE DAY I trust my spouse wholeheartedly.
PRAYER FOR THE DAY Lord, teach me how to trust my spouse in Jesus name.
THOUGHT FOR THE DAY I exhort therefore, that, first of all, supplications, prayers, intercessions, and giving of thanks, be made for all men; 1Ti 2:1
ACTION PLAN FOR THE DAY Decide to show genuine love to your spouse.
There are some things every couple must not joke with in the marriage. They must constantly ensure these things are present in their marriage no matter what happens.
Marriage is for two mature people that are whole. Each person brings his or her wholeness to the marriage to form a whole marriage.
In the natural, it is half plus half that makes whole but in a godly marriage, the equation is different. It is whole plus whole that makes one or whole. In fact, it is whole plus whole plus God that makes a whole entity in marriage.
So let’s look into these few things.
1. Agreement
Do two walk together except they make an appointment and have agreed? – Amo 3:3
There must be an agreement between the couple. They must ensure they always come to a place of agreement. It takes a lot of maturity, respect, and understanding to do that.
I remember when my husband first told me we will be praying online every day 5:30 am to 6:00 am. On that first morning, my body wanted to resist. I had to put my body under and be in agreement for us to do the will of God. And now my body clock has adjusted.
In such a way, we must be in agreement so we can achieve great feats in our lives.
Did you miss out on yesterday’s devotional, we’ve got you covered kindly go HERE. For KHC video Devotionals kindly go HERE
2. Effective Communication
Your relationship started in the first place because you were able to effectively communicate to your lady that you love her and that you want her to marry you. You made your intentions known to her.
This communication must be an essential tool throughout your marriage and you must be skillful in using it.
Both men and women need to be skillful in communicating. Timing is also important in communication. There are certain times to say certain things. There is the best time when your husband will listen to what you have to say.
There is also the ‘how’, talking about the presentation of what you have to say. There is always a better way to arrange your points, especially if your husband is pretty smart, intelligent, and not too patient. You want to present the most important issues first and sandwich it with accolades.
God bless our marriage
CONFESSION FOR THE DAY I am in agreement with my spouse in all areas.
PRAYER FOR THE DAY Lord, teach me to be supportive of my spouse in Jesus name.
THOUGHT FOR THE DAY I exhort therefore, that, first of all, supplications, prayers, intercessions, and giving of thanks, be made for all men; 1Ti 2:1
ACTION PLAN FOR THE DAY Begin to look at areas you can give your support and begin to give it.
We started this topic yesterday. Let’s go further as we unravel the mystery behind having a model marriage.
1. Be supportive
The role of the wife is that of support. Support in what? Support in whatever and everything your husband is doing? In the small things as well as the big things, serious or not so serious things, relevant or not so relevant things.
It is difficult to say what is relevant to him or not because women and men are wired differently. That is why you need to make up your mind to be supportive in all areas.
This cannot be overemphasized. Our role is that of support. As a wife, you have to learn it, pray it into your life and ask for Grace to be a supportive wife.
You can give your support in very numerous ways. Be observant and sensitive you will know where to support your husband.
You may also have to ask him from time to time, how you can support him now because seasons in marriage change. So don’t be rigid. Support him with your finances. Don’t detach your support from your finances.
Did you miss out on yesterday’s devotional, we’ve got you covered kindly go HERE. For KHC video Devotionals kindly go HERE
2. Be prayerful
As a wife, if you don’t pray for your husband, who or what do you then pray for? We should be praying for our husbands daily as top priority.
And when he was at the place, he said unto them, Pray that ye enter not into temptation. And said unto them, Why sleep ye? rise and pray, lest ye enter into temptation. – Luk 22: 40, 46
When you pray, you guide yourself from entering into unnecessary temptations. If your husband is anointed, he needs prayers. If he is not so anointed, he needs prayers. Whichever way you want to look at it, he just needs prayers.
He needs prayers to take the right decisions. He also has authority over you.
I exhort therefore, that, first of all, supplications, prayers, intercessions, and giving of thanks, be made for all men; For kings, and for all that are in authority; that we may lead a quiet and peaceable life in all godliness and honesty. – 1Ti 2:1-2
When we pray for our husbands, we are also praying for ourselves because only then can we live a peaceable and quiet life.
To be continued tomorrow…
CONFESSION FOR THE DAY I am a supportive and praying wife.
PRAYER FOR THE DAY Lord, help me to do all that is needed to have a model marriage
THOUGHT FOR THE DAY Luk 22:46 And said unto them, Why sleep ye? rise and pray, lest ye enter into temptation.
ACTION PLAN FOR THE DAY Begin to look at areas you can give your support and begin to give it.
I almost can hear someone say, ‘can one really have a model marriage?’ My answer is an absolutely yes. You can have a model marriage, but you have to be willing to work at it. Marriage is work, but God promised that our labor of love will be rewarded.
The work requires the input of both the husband and the wife. It is not supposed to be the sole responsibility of one spouse to do all the laboring. Both should labour for the marriage but in different aspect of the marriage.
Marriage requires hard work, commitment, sacrifice and like someone puts it, you have an appointment with 4 things,
1. Appointment with losing
2. Appointment with dying
3. Appointment with sacrifice
4. Appointment with suffering
All these look negative but in reality, they are just God’s way of developing our faith muscle and causing us to die to the flesh.
Did you miss out on yesterday’s devotional, we’ve got you covered kindly go HERE. For KHC video Devotionals kindly go HERE
It is not only women who need to lose, die, sacrifice and suffer, but both the husband as well as the wife.
A wife loses her life just to care for her children. So it’s not really losing, dying, sacrificing in terms of punishment but to gain something higher and worthwhile.
So also, you have to die to your own convenient ways or your opinions if things will work out In the marriage.
Tomorrow, I will point out some things the wives can do to have a model marriage.
God bless your marriage!
CONFESSION FOR THE DAY I am supportive of my husband in all areas.
PRAYER FOR THE DAY Lord, teach me to be a supportive spouse in Jesus name.
THOUGHT FOR THE DAY Eph 5:22 For wives, this means being supportive to your husbands like you are tenderly devoted to our Lord.
ACTION PLAN FOR THE DAY Begin to look at areas you can give your support and begin to give it.
