Breaking the Chains of Vengeance In Marriage

Breaking the Chains of Vengeance In Marriage

Reading Time: 2 minutes

Breaking the Chains of Vengeance In Marriage

Let’s talk about a marriage that’s dancing on the edge – a tango of revenge and retaliation. It’s a twisted tale where love and respect take a backseat, making room for a toxic brew of fear and animosity.

In this scenario, couples aren’t motivated by love or mutual respect; it’s the fear of being crushed that drives their behavior. It’s a roller-coaster of bitterness, hurt, strife, and a cocktail of justifiable evils.

Emotional Chaos Unleashed

Here, emotional tantrums are not just tolerated; they’re practically encouraged. Outbursts of anger are the norm, creating a battleground within the supposed sanctuary of marriage.

The Unbalanced Power Play

Picture this: the man demands reverence and the woman? Well, she better worship him, or life becomes a living nightmare. Love, agreement, and cooperation – all held hostage by the looming threat of punishment.

Love Withdrawal Tactics

Trouble arises when love becomes a bargaining chip. The woman, in a bid to retaliate, withholds love, intimacy, agreement, cooperation, and goodwill. It’s a silent but potent form of punishment, casting a dark cloud over the relationship.

A Cycle of Retribution

What follows is a dangerous tit-for-tat game. The man, feeling the sting of emotional and sexual starvation, retaliates by flexing his authority as the man of the house. It’s a never-ending cycle, a destructive loop of retaliation.

The Silent Sufferers

But guess who bears the brunt of this vengeful waltz? Both the man and the woman suffer the consequences. As the Yoruba proverb wisely puts it, “When it is uneasy for the rope, it equally becomes uneasy for the bird.”

A Marriage in Flames

In the heat of this retaliation, the marriage becomes an unbearable inferno for both parties. The burning question: If we make this marriage work, is it for our own good or to save face?

The Bed We Make

Reflect on this – the way you lay your bed determines how you lie on it. If you roughen the sheets, don’t expect a restful night. But invest in your marriage, work on it, and you’ll reap the sweet dividends.

A Call to Change

If you choose the path of reacting to every provocation, insisting only your viewpoint matters, you’re in for a turbulent ride. 

Decide to do it God’s way! Don’t be vengeful! Forgive easily and avoid marital retaliation! Good morning! 

Show Love I Give/Partner I Chat Pastor Dunamis I Check Courses I Vent/Ask Questions I Join WhatsApp Channel I YouTube I Instagram I TikTok I Facebook I Twitter I Singles’ Hub I Couples Hub


The Turbulent Waters of In-Law Drama in Marriage

The Turbulent Waters of In-Law Drama in Marriage

Reading Time: 2 minutes

The Turbulent Waters of In-Law Drama in Marriage

Hey there, folks! Let’s dive into the wild world of in-law troubles, a topic that has wreaked havoc on marriages, especially in the vibrant African culture.

The Cultural Conundrum

You know, culture and ethnicity are like the spice of life, but hey, remember, the Gospel isn’t playing favorites with any of that. It’s like the GPS for life, guiding us through the twists and turns.

God’s Guidance

Now, picture this: scriptures standing tall as the beacon of truth, illuminating the path in the chaos of in-law drama. Ignore these divine principles, and you’re basically sending out invites for trouble – and who wants that?

God vs. Chaos

It’s a showdown, my friends. Your cultural beliefs on one side, and God’s word on the other. Who’s going to win? Well, hint: siding with culture might land you in the trouble zone.

Team God or Team Chaos

In the epic battle against in-law issues, husbands and wives, listen up – you’ve got two options. You either roll with God’s playbook or throw your own rulebook into the ring. Your call.

The In-Law Richter Scale

Now, let’s get real. The intensity of in-law challenges is like a rollercoaster, different for every marriage. Brace yourself and tackle it as a dynamic duo, because you’re in for a ride.

God’s Blueprint for Marriage

Enter Genesis 2:24, the ultimate relationship handbook. “A man shall leave his father and mother and cleave unto his wife.” Translation? Your spouse trumps all other ties.

Leaving and Cleaving 101

Husbands, pay attention. You’re not just physically leaving; you’re emotionally and spiritually detaching too. Your wife is now numero uno. It’s not just a suggestion; it’s a responsibility.

The Naked Truth

Hold on, we’re not getting scandalous here. According to Genesis, being “naked” means being open, vulnerable, without shame, but only with your spouse. No third parties allowed, folks!

No Man Should Put Asunder

Now, to Matthew 19:6, where God drops the mic: “What God has joined, let no man put asunder.” Translation? You’re a package deal now, and no meddling hands should break that bond. Not even in-laws

The United Front

Couples, listen close. In God’s eyes, you’re a tag team, a dynamic duo, one flesh. Anyone trying to split you apart is in for a serious reality check.

Parental Reality Check

Parents, you’re on notice too. No playing favorites, no picking sides. Both spouses are a package deal, and any attempt to treat them otherwise is a big no-no.

Diplomacy 101

Tackling in-law issues requires finesse. Let your parents know, with all the wisdom you can muster, that your spouse is the top person in your life. It’s not disrespect; it’s setting the right priorities.

Wisdom from Above

When in doubt, ask the big guy upstairs for wisdom. Never assume you’ve got it all figured out. Trust me, a bit of divine guidance can go a long way.

Alright, folks, that’s a wrap for today. Navigating in-law drama may be tricky, but with a sprinkle of divine wisdom and a dash of love, you can conquer it. Until next time, stay united and keep the love alive!

Three Things Every Husband Should Do

Three Things Every Husband Should Do

Reading Time: 2 minutes

Three Things Every Husband Should Do

1. Shower Her with Words of Love

Gentlemen, buckle up because we’re about to dive into the heart of every woman’s secret desire. Picture this: a marriage counselor spills the beans that, for the ladies, hearing “I love you” is like getting a surprise bouquet on a random Tuesday.

One woman, frustrated with her love-deprived relationship, voiced her concerns. But, oh boy, did her husband take it to the next level! He hit the recording studio, creating a love symphony, a 70-minute ballad of “I love yous.” A CD was born, a declaration of affection on repeat.

Proudly presenting it to his wife, he said, “My pepperento potatoe,” play this anytime you need my dulcet tones.” And then, like a tragic romance novel twist, she shattered it and sent it airborne. The lesson here? A CD can’t replace the real deal.

Dear husbands, take note. Compliments from others should never outshine your love notes at home. Especially after childbirth and as the midlife roller coaster hits, your wife needs your affirmations more than ever. Mirrors might be close, but your words should be closer.

2. Hand in Hand, Heart in Heart at Church

Let’s talk about spiritual unity, where the bond is as unbreakable as a hymn sung together. As the head, you’re not just the CEO of your family but also the spiritual guide. Forget the separate pew routine; attend church, grow, study, and pray together for heaven’s sake.

It’s not just a Sunday thing; it’s a build-a-strong-marriage thing. Your responsibility? Spiritual leadership and direction. This isn’t about denominations; it’s about creating a sanctuary within your marriage.

3. Love, Don’t Lift Your Hands

Now, gentlemen, a crucial piece of advice: Never, and I mean never, raise your hands against your wife. This isn’t a suggestion; it’s a commandment in the Book of Marriage Wisdom.

“Yeah, but my wife is like a whirlwind of stubbornness, rudeness, and annoyance!” I hear you. But let me be crystal clear—violence is not the answer.

In the sacred scripture of 1 Peter 3:7, it’s written: “Likewise, ye husbands, dwell with them according to knowledge, giving honour unto the wife…” Make a sacred vow, a covenant, that you’ll never harm her.

Commit to honoring, protecting, and cherishing her. As you do, watch God weave wonders into your marriage. May His blessings rain down on you, turning your love story into an epic tale of honor and fulfillment.

Be blessed on this extraordinary journey of love!

Before And After Tying The Knot Part 3

Before And After Tying The Knot Part 3

Reading Time: 2 minutes

Before And After Tying The Knot Part 3

Love Beyond Emotions: The Power of Guiding Principles

Let’s pick up from where we left off yesterday, delving into a crucial aspect of successful marriages.

7. The Nexus of Love and Principles

In the realm of matrimony, love is not an isolated entity; it’s intricately woven with principles. Contrary to the notion that emotional feelings suffice, it’s essential to recognize the distinction between love and fleeting emotions.

Love lacks a substantial foundation without principles. It is these guiding principles that provide the bedrock for a lasting and resilient love. In the tumultuous storms that inevitably hit every marriage, principles become the anchor, ensuring survival.

Life, with its unpredictable twists, affects us all. Drawing inspiration from the biblical perspective, we are declared more than conquerors through Christ. The battles will come, but adherence to principles becomes the pathway to victory.

8. Marriage: A Spiritual Commitment

Some erroneously perceive marriage solely through the lens of emotions. However, it extends far beyond mere emotionalism.

Assuming all is well because of external factors; job security, good health, and a comfortable life, can lead to complacency. Personal experience underscores the danger of becoming lax when everything seems smooth.

Marriage is inherently spiritual before it manifests in the physical realm. An essential prerequisite for a successful union is a willingness to embrace a serious relationship with God.

Every man is the priest of his family. It goes beyond superficial gestures; leadership entails leading the family towards spiritual growth. Both partners must actively participate in studying God’s word, prayer, fasting, tithing, and other covenant practices.

9. Spiritual Unity

True leadership involves more than romantic gestures. Men are called to lead their families to God, speaking in authority over their wives and children.

Reject the notion that only one partner needs to be spiritual. Both parties must be committed prayer warriors, believers in the Bible, and actively engage in spiritual disciplines.

In conclusion, the journey of a successful marriage requires a fusion of love and principles, transcending mere emotional bonds. 

May this insight grant you a deeper understanding as you navigate the intricate path of matrimony.

Before And After Tying The Knot Part 2 

Before And After Tying The Knot Part 2 

Reading Time: 2 minutes

Before And After Tying The Knot Part 2 

In the journey towards marital bliss, certain mindsets need recalibration for a harmonious union. 

I started this topic two days ago! If you missed it check it below.

Let’s delve deeper into this. 

4. Financial Fusion: Our Money, Our Responsibility

Entering matrimony means surrendering the notion of individual finances. The money you earn is no longer exclusively yours; it’s a shared asset with your spouse. Decisions regarding expenditures become collaborative, emphasizing financial prudence.

Each spending choice requires thoughtful consideration, and extravagant gestures should involve consultation with one’s partner.

Husbands, too, must exercise financial prudence. Impulsive spending without consulting one’s spouse can lead to financial instability. Transparency in financial matters not only fosters trust but acts as a deterrent against extramarital affairs.

Understanding the principles of tithing and sowing becomes paramount. Neglecting tithing severs the potential for financial blessings. Harmonizing financial beliefs strengthens the marital bond.

Check out our courses and enroll today

5. Reciprocal Love: Beyond Being Cared For

While desiring care in a marriage is natural, a skewed focus solely on receiving undermines the essence of matrimony. Marriage is a divine call to serve one another. Being cared for and loved are outcomes, not entitlements.

Marriage thrives on mutual service. Demanding care and love places undue pressure on a spouse. Instead, fostering an environment of love ensures a reciprocal flow of affection and care.

In the marital journey, refrain from demanding love; let it flow organically. By actively showing love, you create a cycle of affection that enriches the relationship.

Join our Whatsapp Channel

6. Marriage: A Garden, Not a Supermarket

Dispelling the misconception that marriage is a transactional space is crucial. It’s not a restaurant where services are demanded, nor a supermarket where desires are instantly gratified. Rather, marriage is akin to tending a garden.

The analogy of a garden aptly captures the essence of marriage. The effort invested determines the yield. A Yoruba proverb encapsulates this idea: “If you want a good pot of stew, be ready to spend good money.” In marriage, effort begets reward.

Intentional Effort for Bliss

Marital happiness is a result of intentional effort. You reap what you sow. Much like cultivating a garden, tending to the marriage is a continuous process that demands commitment.

In conclusion, a thriving marriage requires financial unity, a mindset of reciprocal love, and the understanding that it’s a garden that flourishes with intentional effort. May this wisdom guide you toward a fulfilling and lasting union.

May your journey in marriage be blessed with understanding and joy!