Uncovering Four Damaging Character Flaws

Uncovering Four Damaging Character Flaws

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Uncovering Four Damaging Character Flaws

Character flaws are not death sentences but defects that we should be willing to change. Change doesn’t come easy. However, to grow we all need to change. The only constant thing is change.  No one is born with the perfect set of characters, we all learn and cultivate them.

Many character flaws are destructive in relationships and marriage. It is essential to talk about them because once we are in love, we may not realize or pay attention to the signs that character flaws are present in your fiance or fiancee. 

Here are four character flaws

1. Pride

Once married you and your spouse are joined together as one and you don’t want to be destroyed along with your spouse. Pride goes before a fall.  You will notice pride when your partner has an over-inflated ego, doesn’t listen to correction, thinks he knows it all, and feels they are always the boss.  Humility is a virtue and it can be learned. Satan was proud and that was why he was cast down. So if you notice even the slightest trace of pride begin to do something about it. Often the person with the flaw may be ignorant of it.

Job 36:9 (MSG) God tells them where they’ve gone wrong, shows them how their pride has caused their trouble.

2. Insincerity

This is a character flaw that may have been learned from childhood as a coping mechanism. Some use it as a defense mechanism. It is not being truthful. The Bible recommends that our Yea be Yea and our Nay be Nay.  When your partner has problems with being sincere you need to pay attention to this character flaw.

3. Laziness 

A lazy person is the devil’s workshop. One of the virtues one should look for in a partner is hard work. Not just working hard but also working smart. If you learn to work hard, you will learn to cultivate your garden and grow your barren land turning it into a green pasture. There is dignity in labor while a lazy partner will always find fault with his tools. Fulfilling our destiny requires some level of tenacity and hard work. If you notice your partner is lazy, please pay attention to this character flaw.

Pro 15:19 (MSG) The path of lazy people is overgrown with briers; the diligent walk down a smooth road.

4. Greed

This is another character flaw that will eventually lead to destruction.  Yes, one should have the drive to want more in life, but greed happens when there is an insatiable and burning desire for more material things. This is what we call the mundane things. Anyone chasing the mundane things cannot be a God chaser and a chaser of His kingdom. A greedy person will chase shadows at the expense of the real things. A greedy person will neglect his family all in the name of making more money. 

Pay close attention to these character defects to avoid stories that touch the heart.

Be blessed.




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Five Things to Look for in a Lover Part 1 

Five Things to Look for in a Lover Part 1 

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Five Things to Look for in a Lover Part 1 

Hey there! So, you’re on the quest for the perfect life buddy? Let’s break down the five must-haves in a potential spouse.

I met my wife when I was twenty-four and she was twenty-one, while on campus, some twenty-eight years ago! And yes, there was something I was looking out for even though I was young then! Let’s take a look at a few of these elements as they will help us in our quest for a godly lover! 

  1. The Big G – Fear of God:

Alright, first things first – the fear of God. Not the “oops, I forgot to do my chores” kind of fear, but more like having a super cool and understanding boss. Beauty fades! Beauty is not the first thing. Some strange women are beautiful and some wicked men are handsome.

But if you are blessed with a handsome man or a beautiful woman who also has the fear of God, you are blessed indeed.

Do you know why I have been faithful to my wife? Do you know why I don’t have girlfriends all over the place? The only reason I have not compromised is that I have the FEAR OF GOD! That was what Joseph had and he ran away from free sex. So, go for the fear of God! Beware of people who have the fear of God temporarily just to get what they want.

  1. Keeping It Real – Integrity and Sincerity:

Next up, we’re talking honesty, integrity, and no cheating at board games! 

The scripture says something powerful:
The integrity of the upright shall guide them: but the perverseness of transgressors shall destroy them. (Proverbs 11:3 KJV)

Now, if you come up with arguments like, there is no sincere man, every man is bad and this and that, that is what you will attract. You cannot attract what you don’t believe exists! Don’t conclude on humanity because of your experience with one man! All men are wicked, you are wrong! All ladies are stupid, you are wrong as well. You need to renew your mind by God’s word and to believe God for the best.

I will conclude this topic tomorrow. Good morning!




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Statements That Show You Are Not Loved Part 2 

Statements That Show You Are Not Loved Part 2 

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Statements That Show You Are Not Loved Part 2 

We started on this yesterday! We will continue this morning!

3. Out of all my girlfriends, you are the best

This is often a logical way to manipulate the emotions of the lady. As a lady, I don’t know what you are doing with someone who tells you out-rightly that you are not the only one he is seeing. 

Are you encouraging adultery after marriage and giving him the go-ahead? Men don’t change after marriage! When a man has the guts to tell you that he has several ladies as lovers including you, then as a lady you should have the guts to walk away from such affliction!

4. We don’t have to tell anybody about this relationship

When a guy begins to make this statement, your antenna should go up! Something is defective right there. There are no commitments when he hides the relationship from friends and family. 

There may be occasions when the parents are not interested in marriage and it is wise to keep quiet for some time, but at least, he should be willing to notify his pastor. What if he doesn’t have a pastor? The answer to that is another question. What are you doing with such a person?

5. I am just managing you and you should thank your stars

When a guy doesn’t love you, he will verbalize it one day, one way or the other. If you are sensitive, you can pick it up from his words. When a guy says he is just managing you, that sounds like wickedness to me. 

Probably the lady in question has a self-esteem issue, but as a lady, you don’t have any business with anybody who doesn’t value you or appreciate you as a person. After marriage, you don’t want to be treated as a doormat, you want to be valued as a help.




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Six Things I Expect From My Wife

Six Things I Expect From My Wife

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Six Things I Expect From My Wife

Here are six things I expect from my wife.

This will give ladies an idea of what men want from them

1. I expect my wife to respect me 

We all know that respect is the greatest need of a man. Every wife should strive to honor and respect her husband.

This will go a long way to make your husband honor you as well because you always reap what you sow.

2. I expect my wife to support and encourage my ministry/career

My wife should be my greatest and Number one fan of course!

As a wife, you should support, encourage, and strengthen your husband to to go forth and fulfill destiny and purpose.

Whether he’s conquering the corporate world or preaching to the masses, you’re the loudest cheerleader in the room.

3. I expect my wife to pray for me always and be my greatest intercessor
Women are powerful prayers.

The genuine prayers of a happy wife will advance your life in no small measure.

Wives, pray for your husband!

Be the intercessor ninja he never knew he needed. Your prayers are like a magic potion, brewing success and happiness.

4. I expect my wife to be homely, caring, and loving
A woman who is not homely shows no care, and detests cooking will be a constant source of frustration to the husband.

There is something in women that makes caring natural with them 

Forget about runway models; your catwalk is from the kitchen to the bedroom. Serve love, not just dinner!

5. I expect my wife to look beautiful always 

All men are moved by sight including me!

So, I expect my wife to look good always.
Women, do not get careless with your appearance and your looks. 

Look your best all the time!

All men are moved by sight, so keep that dazzling smile and killer outfit game on point. You never know when the paparazzi (aka your husband) might strike!

6. I expect my wife to keep the bedroom hot 

 Sexual satisfaction is paramount to any marriage that will not collapse.

Wives, do not get careless in this area.

It is an obligation! 

Never use sex as a reward or punishment.

1Co 7:5 (AMP)  

Do not refuse and deprive and defraud each other [ of your due marital rights ], except perhaps by mutual consent for a time, so that you may devote yourselves unhindered to prayer. But afterwards resume marital relations, lest Satan tempt you [ to sin ] through your lack of restraint of sexual desire.

I will stop here this morning!

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More Symptoms of Relationship Immaturity

More Symptoms of Relationship Immaturity

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More Symptoms of Relationship Immaturity

Yesterday I started on this topic and looked at five symptoms of immaturity in your relationship. I will conclude this morning with the remaining five.

Immaturity, though not inherently sinful, serves as a breeding ground for destructive behaviors within the realm of relationships. Our journey takes us through the subtle intricacies that hinder personal growth and consequently erode the foundation of meaningful connections.

Hebrews 12:1 guides us on this expedition: “Let us lay aside every weight, and the sin which so easily besets us, and let us run with patience the race that is set before us.” It’s a call to shed the burdens of immaturity, run the race of growth with endurance.

The Greatest Pitfall: Selfishness

At the heart of immaturity lies selfishness. Relationships thrive on love’s sacrificial essence. An immature connection, clouded by self-centeredness, is destined for turbulence.

1 Corinthians 13:4-6 beautifully outlines the attributes of love, emphasizing its patience, kindness, and aversion to self-aggrandizement. A relationship devoid of these qualities is a ship sailing against the winds of maturity.

More Symptoms of Immaturity:

  1. Neglecting God and His Principles
    The essence of a relationship is deeply intertwined with divine principles. Failing to prioritize God in the union reflects a lack of maturity. God’s principles are the bedrock, providing stability to the intricate dance of companionship.

    Picture this: God, the relationship superhero, swooping in with a cape made of divine principles. Neglecting that? Well, it’s like trying to fight crime without your superhero suit.
  2. Deceit in the Relationship
    Lies, deceit, and double standards are the hallmarks of immaturity. Sincerity and transparency, on the other hand, signify emotional maturity, paving the way for a relationship rooted in truth.
  3. Financial Instability
    True financial stability extends beyond material possessions. It’s about self-sufficiency, the ability to meet one’s needs without dependency. A mature partner is not meant to be a financial crutch; instead, both contribute to the relationship’s prosperity.
  4. Low Self-Esteem
    A mature individual understands their worth, deriving it from an unwavering self-esteem. Insecurity and seeking external approval are hallmarks of immaturity, capable of wreaking havoc and compromising one’s integrity.
  5. Abusive Behavior
    Any form of abuse, whether verbal, emotional, or physical, is a glaring symptom of immaturity. Relationships are mutual, complementary endeavors where superiority has no place. Abuse dismantles the foundation of shared strength and understanding. Say no to abuse; it’s not in the script!

Shedding the garments of immaturity requires introspection, commitment to growth, and adherence to divine principles. May the journey towards emotional maturity be one guided by self-awareness, compassion, and a relentless pursuit of true love.

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