As I listened to God’s Spirit to know what I will write this morning, I heard something about focus. So I believe the few words you are about to read are heaven’s message for you this morning.
And Jesus said unto him, No man, having put his hand to the plough, and looking back, is fit for the kingdom of God. – Luk 9:62 KJV
Dear married couple, I write to you this morning on one ingredient you need, not only in your marriage but in life.
It is called focus! I like the definition that says “To concentrate attention or energy.”
In this contemporaneous world filled with mega distractions, there is no such time as this when this message becomes relevant.
When the devil wants to trap you, he brings distractions. The moment you are enticed and yielded, the focus is broken and the process of what God is trying to do in your life becomes delayed.
A child of God attending night parties for example will have his or her focus broken. There are things they do at night parties that you wouldn’t be able to share testimonies about, so there is no point wasting your time in such places. It’s just distractions.
There are ungodly friends that you keep that can break your focus. Many a life has been ruined by wrong associations.
When you engage in adultery, it’s a distraction and your focus will be broken. No matter how nice the person is, what is wrong is wrong!
The moment you put your hand on the plough, a process about your life and the plan of God for you begins and it is gradually unveiled. The moment you start to compromise, you tamper with that process! You are not supposed to look back. Looking back is not a kingdom mentality.
In the amours of a believer listed in the book of Ephesians, only the back has no protection! Why? You are not meant to look back!
The question is what do you focus on?
CONFESSION FOR THE DAY I am focused. I will not be distracted.
PRAYER FOR THE DAY Pray that God will give you focus and cause your face to be set like a flint
THOUGHT FOR THE DAY Isa 50:7 AMP For the Lord God helps Me; therefore have I not been ashamed or confounded. Therefore have I set My face like a flint, and I know that I shall not be put to shame.
ACTION PLAN FOR THE DAY Consciously disengage yourself from every distraction
SINGLES – Dear Pastor, Can I Kiss My Fiancé or Fiancée?
A few days ago, on one of our WhatsApp platforms, a question was raised on the subject of kissing and we had several interesting comments. By the way, if you are single and yet to join our discussion hub on WhatsApp, do so HERE. There are discussions, questions, and answers you can learn from on a daily basis.
I have been asked several times about this issue. A lot of people believe there is nothing wrong with kissing. In fact, most people believe it is godly. The question is, ‘is it right or wrong?’
Before, I answer the question; let us look at the scripture that is often quoted to justify kissing in relationships.
Salute one another with an holy kiss. The churches of Christ salute you. – Rom 16:16 KJV
All the brethren greet you. Greet ye one another with an holy kiss. – 1Co 16:20 KJV
Greet one another with an holy kiss. – 2Co 13:12 KJV
Greet all the brethren with an holy kiss. – 1Th 5:26 KJV
From the above scriptures, it looks like a kiss is not a sin, and sincerely, in the context of the above scriptures, it is not a sin.
What is the above context? It is a cultural context. A Jewish kiss is a form of greetings in those days. Nothing more! See an example here:
And his father Isaac said unto him, Come near now, and kiss me, my son. – Gen 27:26 KJV
The issue with us in this part of the world is that we don’t greet with a kiss. You can’t lock your lips with your fiancée for over thirty minutes and then turn around to say you’ve just been greeting her! What kind of greeting was that? What type of greeting were you doing that your heartbeats accelerated and your hands got busy?
The scripture above says to greet one another with a holy kiss. Now, the Jewish kiss may be holy, but I am not sure that the Nigerian kiss is holy!
To be continued…
CONFESSION FOR THE DAY Lord, I receive wisdom to discern between positive and negative influences in my life and grace to avoid the negative.
PRAYER FOR THE DAY In Jesus’ name, I resist the power of negative influence over my life.
THOUGHT FOR THE DAY Rom 7:25 MSG The answer, thank God, is that Jesus Christ can and does. He acted to set things right in this life of contradictions where I want to serve God with all my heart and mind, but am pulled by the influence of sin to do something totally different.
ACTION PLAN FOR THE DAY Cut off your association with any person, place, or thing that is influencing you negatively.
It will probably bring more. You have one more life to manage. If you cannot manage yours and you venture into marriage, it will be a disaster. When the children start coming, there will be more pressure. Learn to take pressures head-on by casting your care on Jesus and refusing to worry as the scripture advises.
5. Marriage is not all about lovemaking.
Ask somebody who is married. Yes, sexual intercourse is a marital glue, a healing balm in the soul for couples, and a blessing that keeps couples together. But it is not like you think intercourse in the morning, afternoon, and evening. Average couples actually make love twice or thrice in a week. However, the more frequent it is for married couples, the better for them.
6. Your spouse will neither be a magician nor is he the Holy Spirit.
He will be a human being with his own issues. You will always need God. He might be very anointed on the pulpit and filled with God’s glory while she is ministering in the choir, but at home, he or she is a human being with all the weaknesses complete. Learn to separate the office or position of your spouse from his or her person at home.
7. Marriage is not all about kisses, flowers, cinemas, cakes, chocolates, and vacations alone.
It is about cooking, pampers, crying babies, working, paying school fees, and so on. It is about budgets, plans, strategies, and divine wisdom. It is about submission to your husband who you sometimes think is hard, insensitive, and unloving. It is about loving your wife who you sometimes think is stubborn, does not want to be corrected, and can nag from morning till the next day. Few Things Marriage Will Not Do For You
CONFESSION FOR THE DAY I keep on praying over my relationship in season and out of season.
PRAYER FOR THE DAY Lord, let your grace rest upon my relationship in Jesus name
THOUGHT FOR THE DAY Php 4:6 KJVBe careful for nothing; but in everything by prayer and supplication with thanksgiving let your requests be made known unto God.
ACTION PLAN FOR THE DAY Decide to be a happy single
SINGLES – three types of men ladies need to know about.
1. HUNTERS
They use ladies for their own satisfaction or consumption. They are skilled at searching for beautiful but ignorant and naive ladies. They watch out for rich ladies to service their financial needs. They are in it for what they can get out of the lady.
They look out for ladies living abroad or who have foreign citizenship, who works in juicy places like the Oil and Gas sector to capitalize on.
This is a wrong motive for a relationship and it will always come with its attendant consequences. What the hunter does not know is that he cannot be smarter than God. He is soon consumed in his own lust.
Hunters are manipulators, their headlight is fixed and when they focus on potential prey, they have a way of hypnotizing them.
How do you avoid a hunter?
Stay in God’s word and always seek his face before you take any decision.
Our soul is escaped as a bird out of the snare of the fowlers: the snare is broken, and we are escaped. –Psalms 124:7 (KJV)
What do you do as a single if you find yourself in this kind of relationship?
Deliver thyself as a roe from the hand of the hunter, and as a bird from the hand of the fowler. –Proverbs 6:5 (KJV)
Disconnect! A relationship is not by force, but by choice. You have the power to choose.
CONFESSION FOR THE DAY I will not fall into the hands of a hunter or scavenger. I am a fruitful vine.
PRAYERS FOR THE DAY I refuse to be the object of abuse by any man. I ask that you help our men occupy their place in destiny, Amen.
THOUGHT FOR THE DAY Deliver thyself as a roe from the hand of the hunter, and as a bird from the hand of the fowler. –Proverbs 6:5 (KJV)
ACTION PLAN FOR THE DAY Get yourself out of any abusive relationship
SINGLES – How To Be Sure Of Your Choice In Marriage
Being directed or led by God is the most important issue before marriage; when you are not led, it only leads to misery, pains, sorrow, and regrets.
My prayer is that you will not experience these. If your answer to that prayer is amen, now is the time to be sure that the person you are in love with is God’s choice for you.
Just because you are in love with someone does not give you enough basis to enter into a lifetime covenant with the person. It’s very easy to fall in love, all it takes is that person having all the qualities you admire, being physically attractive, spending time together, giving him/her a special place in your heart, thinking about him/her a lot and you’re already in love.
You’ll agree with me that it’s possible to fall in love with more than one person but only one person is qualified to be your wife/husband.
Once you have identified your spouse, you are no longer permitted to desire others, but to only admire them.
GOD then used the rib that he had taken from the Man to make Woman and presented her to the Man. The Man said, “Finally! Bone of my bone, flesh of my flesh! Name her Woman for she was made from Man.” Therefore a man leaves his father and mother and embraces his wife. They become one flesh. –Genesis 2:22-24 (MSG)
The above scripture shows that God himself was very much involved in bringing the man and the woman together.
For as many as are led by the Spirit of God, they are the sons of God. –Romans 8:14 (KJV)
The question is, do you have God’s spirit? Are you born again? If yes, how are you working on your relationship with God? How consistently do you study God’s word?
What service do you render in a local assembly? How well you answer these questions will determine how well your spirit is developed to receive directions from God, not only in matters of your relationships but in all areas.
You must also make sure that the three aspects of you agree with the choice of your life partner.
Man is essentially a spirit; you have a soul and live in a body. Do these three (spirit, soul, and body) agree in perfect harmony.
Is there peace? Is he/she intelligent and emotionally mature?
Are you friends? Someone said friendship in marriage is about one soul living in two bodies.
Physically, does he/she meet your standard of beauty? Are you attractive to each other?
Go to any length to find adequate answers to these questions. Ask him/her a lot of questions. Find out where he/she is going. Can you fit in?
Is the guy a good leader? How well has he led himself? Can he lead you well?
Becoming sure is all about erasing every doubt or question in your heart about the person, the relationship, and the future. No one can be sure for you. Until you’re totally sure and convinced, don’t say YES!
Don’t tie the nuptial knots until all the knotty issues are resolved. I pray that God will send help your way in Jesus name!
CONFESSION FOR THE DAY I have direction from God. In my relationship decisions, I am being led by the Spirit of God. I am not confused in Jesus Name. I will not fall in love with the wrong person. The Spirit of God will help me to be sure.
PRAYER FOR THE DAY I destroy every spirit of distraction and deception in Jesus name.
THOUGHT FOR THE DAY Take me by the hand; Lead me down the path of truth. You are my Savior, aren’t you? Psalms 25:5 (MSG)
ACTION PLAN FOR THE DAY Think deeply about your relationships and take an inventory
