Comparing your spouse or anything you have or don’t have in marriage is actually a trap. It leaves you unsatisfied and ungrateful.
The comparison trap as defined in the dictionary is the habit of measuring your life against others and is one of the most toxic behaviors we can engage in. The idea “the grass is greener” is a wild misconception fueled by jealous evaluation, and often leads to stress and anxiety.
Marriage should be lived with the two couples fully into themselves. Whatever they are or whatever they have should be celebrated by the couples. Little can become much if both can focus on what they have.
In marriage, both couples strengths are multiplied to achieve even greater results. Rather than wasting their energies in comparing and preferring another persons spouse to their God given spouse.
Every marriage is unique and has a unique purpose. No two marriages are the same, will go through the same exact path, experience the same things and have the same seasons.
Did you miss out on yesterday’s devotional, we’ve got you covered kindly go HERE. For KHC video Devotionals kindly go HERE
Each marriage is to celebrate their own uniqueness. They are to find joy and happiness in being themselves and in going through their journey.
What comparison does is to stifle the joy in doing life together. Life comes with its own challenges, ups and downs. The strength that God gives, trusting in His word, relying on the Holy Spirit for help, and being on the same page with one another will make the journey sweeter.
Comparing your spouse with the other person deprive your spouse the opportunity of working together with your gifting and talents to achieve the common goal.
Most wives easily fall prey to comparison trap. It is not only in terms of finances is your spouse compared, but in very many ways. From looks, to mannerisms, to gestures, to emotional and mental attributes, to spirituality, intelligence, to material things.
No two people are the same and no two people will go through life in the same way. So give your spouse to grow and become who God says they should be.
This doesn’t mean we should be satisfied with the status quo, No. We are to push ourselves and press on to becoming better. While improving ourselves, we should go through life encouraging our spouse not comparing them.
We may not be satisfy at where our spouse are but we cannot change them, we can only encourage, pray for and trust God for them to become better.
The Lord will help us all in Jesus name.
God bless our marriage.
CONFESSION FOR THE DAY I am wise. I will not compare my spouse with another.
PRAYERS FOR THE DAY Oh Lord, make me satisfied with my spouse.
THOUGHT FOR THE DAY 2 Corinthians 10:12 For we dare not make ourselves of the number, or compare ourselves with some that commend themselves: but they measuring themselves by themselves, and comparing themselves among themselves, are not wise.
ACTION PLAN FOR THE DAY Stop comparing your spouse
God wants and desires husband and wife to naked and not ashamed. The covenant of marriage is meant to be 100% transparency.
God is honored when the husband and wife see themselves in the light of what God ordained marriage to be.
Sincerity in marriage could be defined as the absence of pretense, deceit or hypocrisy.
We do so many things in marriage that doesn’t add up to being sincere. There are lots of half-truth, outright lies, insincerity, hiding things, pretense and being hypocritical.
When there are lies, we build our marriage on falsehood. One degree away from the truth is falsehood and this can be dangerous to the wellbeing of the union.
It is the truth that sets free. The degree of openness is the degree to which there is power available for the couples to be in agreement.
And ye shall know the truth, and the truth shall make you free. – Joh 8:32
Did you miss out on yesterday’s devotional, we’ve got you covered kindly go HERE. For KHC video Devotionals kindly go HERE
It is high time couples learn to be sincere with themselves. Let truth be said in all things. Let’s have zero tolerance for insincerity.
If anything happens, we should be courageous enough to say it as it is. Let’s cast out the spirit of fear from our lives. It is fear of what your spouse will say or do or how he or she will feel disappointed that most of the time, keeps us from saying the truth.
You can ask yourself this simple question; ‘If you say the truth, will he or she kill you?’ He /she may be angry at first but I am sure he/ she will respect you more for the truth you said.
By saying the truth, you shut the door on the devil to keep you bound. You set yourself free. The problem with lies is that you will need more lies to cover up the first lie.
The most distressing thing to do is to be insincere. You belabor yourself trying to hide and cover up.
Another reason we need to be careful of lies in our marriage and home is because lies is in the domain of the devil. Jesus called the devil the liar and the father of all lies.
Let’s learn to say the truth always. It is the truth that sets free!
Little children, let us not love [merely] in theory or in speech but in deed and in truth (in practice and in sincerity). – 1Jn 3:18
May God help us all!
God bless our marriage.
CONFESSION FOR THE DAY I am truthful at all times
PRAYER FOR THE DAY Reject the operations of the devil in your marriage
THOUGHT FOR THE DAY After all, we don’t want to unwittingly give Satan an opening for yet more mischief – we’re not oblivious to his sly ways! (2Co 2:11 MSG)
ACTION PLAN FOR THE DAY Decide to be truthful no matter what
We started on this topic yesterday and when we read Proverbs 31, we should do so with the mind of; ‘it’s possible, let me glean wisdom, work and walk towards becoming a better woman
8. She depends on the Holy Spirit for strength to run her home.
She doesn’t run her home on the traditions or expectations of men. The Holy Spirit is her senior partner. She knows how to engage his help. She seeks for the help of the Holy Spirit on all things nothing is too small or too big.
9. Her husband is her best friend
She is closest to her husband. He is not just her friend, he is her best friend. She talks to him, confides in him, and cherishes their relationship together.
10. She takes care of her physical looks and her emotions
She looks good all the time for her husband. She is not too expensive she is simply pretty. She also learns to take care of her emotions. She smiles all the time and does not harbor hurt, bitterness, or anything that can kill her joy. She is always bubbling over with joy. She has made up her mind to remain joyful.
11. There is no word like divorce in her dictionary
Divorce is a NO, NO for her no matter what. Come rain or high waters, she respects her covenant before God.
Did you miss out on yesterday’s devotional, we’ve got you covered kindly go HERE. For KHC video Devotionals kindly go HERE
12. She is 100% focused on her home, knowing that her home is the first church.
She does not compare her home to others. She appreciates the home and her family because she knows they are gifts from God. She prioritizes her home and does all she needs to do to make sure her family is exactly what it is meant to be.
13. She respects her in-laws and treats them as souls for the kingdom of God.
She loves and respects her in-laws as her own.
CONFESSION FOR THE DAY I am a virtuous woman
PRAYER FOR THE DAY Lord Jesus, help me to be an award-winning woman
THOUGHT FOR THE DAY Proverbs 31:11[NLT]Her husband can trust her, and she will greatly enrich his life.
The Proverbs 31 woman is certainly a superwoman; I used to think no woman can beat her record. Sometimes I used to feel like it is impossible for one person to have it all figured out as she does. Then, there was a time I just concluded that it cannot be a real contemporary woman of our time.
At another time, I didn’t like to read about the proverb 31 woman because she showed me how inadequate I was. All these different emotions and thoughts went through my mind at different stages of my twenty-two years marriage experience.
Now, I think I am wiser and more secure. When I read Proverbs 31, I read with the mind of; ‘it’s possible, let me glean wisdom, work and walk towards becoming better.
Here is wisdom to glean. Please do read through proverbs 31.
1. She is 100% committed to her husband’s vision.
We are to reorder our steps if you love your kids more than your husband. The right order is to be 100% committed to your husband. You have a covenant responsibility towards him. You are to care for your children.
2. She watches and prays over her entire household like Mother Hen.
Be like a watchdog. We have a male and female Caucasian dog, and it is amazing that it is the female that is always barking and restlessly watching the gate. Why? Because of her puppies, she has her little ones to protect.
3. She makes a giant out of every dwarf that lives under her roof. She also does not dim people’s star
She brings out the better of everyone, not only her children but everyone that comes in contact with her.
4. She invests more than she spends. Nothing diminishes in her hands. She is too busy-minded.
Don’t be a consumer alone. Don’t be a CAN (Consumer Association of Nigeria). Try and create wealth, produce something, multiple things. Do business.
Did you miss out on yesterday’s devotional, we’ve got you covered kindly go HERE. For KHC video Devotionals kindly go HERE
5. She is hard working. No room for idleness or gossip.
Being a woman is not synonymous with being a gossip. Be productive, use your time wisely. If you are not caring for the children, be tending the home, care for your husband, pray in tongues for creative ideas, a woman has her plate full, there is a lot to do. Make no room for gossip.
6. She fears God, serving faithfully, tithing dutifully, assisting the less privileged.
She takes her services to God seriously. She knows that God is at the center of everything and he is the one that holds it all together.
7. She does not refuse her Husband Jeru trip for whatever reason.
She is fully aware that Jeru trip is a core course at the university of marriage. She does everything, yet does not neglect and take with levity her roles and duties. She doesn’t fail in her core course.
I will continue tomorrow by God’s Grace.
May God bless our marriage
CONFESSION FOR THE DAY I receive strength to be who God has made me to be
PRAYERS FOR THE DAY Pray for a submissive heart
THOUGHT FOR THE DAY After all, we don’t want to unwittingly give Satan an opening for yet more mischief – we’re not oblivious to his sly ways! (2Co 2:11 MSG)
ACTION PLAN FOR THE DAY Decide to work on your marriage
We started this topic by looking at how Apostle Peter admonished all wives to be devoted to their husbands. He also encouraged wives to avoid nagging as it doesn’t work.
Verse 5
1Pe 3:5 Holy women of long ago who had set their hopes in God beautified themselves with lives lived in deference to their own husbands’ authority.
This verse gives wives examples of women of old and how they navigated their marriage in a God-pleasing manner. These women first have set their hope in God. That means they made God their priority. The Bible tells us they lived in deference to their own husband’s authority.
Now deference means polite submission and respect, to their own husband. That means you have to respect your own husband and politely respect him in all things.
Verse 6
1Pe 3:6 For example, our “mother,” Sarah, devoted herself to her husband, Abraham, and even called him “master.” And you have become her daughters when you do what is right without fear and intimidation.
Did you miss out on yesterday’s devotional, we’ve got you covered kindly go HERE. For KHC video Devotionals kindly go HERE
This verse sets Sarah as our ‘mother’ and advises us to do the same if truly we want to be her daughters. We have to live our lives devoted to our husbands. That is when we have God’s blessings and He grants us favor and prospers the works of our hands.
We have to take responsibility and take up our cross and follow Jesus. Sarah was devoted to her husband and called him master. We should do the same and we will enjoy our married life and be fulfilled as a wife.
May God grant every wife strength to be the wife He has called us to be.
God bless our marriage.
CONFESSION FOR THE DAY I receive strength to be who God has made me to be
PRAYERS FOR THE DAY Pray for a submissive heart
THOUGHT FOR THE DAY After all, we don’t want to unwittingly give Satan an opening for yet more mischief – we’re not oblivious to his sly ways! (2Co 2:11 MSG)
ACTION PLAN FOR THE DAY Read the bible passage in other translations
