It is very true that opposites attract, so it’s not out of place to have one partner more romantic than the other.
Even though romance is a feeling, it can be properly expressed in a decent way, especially in relationships, noting that there is a way to treat your unmarried partner. Like my Pastor said, you are a male by birth but become a gentleman by choice and by learning. So, you also become a lady by choice. There is a proper way to treat each other when you are in love and an improper way to treat each other when in a relationship.
Someone might say, we don’t have to be romantic in a relationship; we have to be all spiritual, so we don’t end up in fornication.
Yes, a lot of caution has to be put in place in order to honor God in your relationship. However, romantic love should not be totally thrown out the window.
Let’s see what romantic love is.
Romance or romantic love can be defined as a feeling of love for, or a strong attraction towards, another person, and the courtship behaviors undertaken by an individual to express those overall feelings and resultant emotions.
As singles, we teach to be courteous and put the brakes on romantic love so it doesn’t get out of hand. Like the Bible says in the Song of Songs:
Song of Songs 8:4 NIV [4] Daughters of Jerusalem, I charge you: Do not arouse or awaken love until it so desires.
There should be a proper blend between being spiritual and being romantic. Being romantic has nothing to do with being sexual. As a single guy, you can treat your partner with so much respect, honor, and courtesy, and that’s being romantic.
Married couples, you have all the license to express love in the most romantic ways without applying the brakes because you are married. Now is not the time to take your spouse for granted because he/she is now yours. Still maintain that strong feeling of love and attractiveness to one another.
5 Ways to Grow Your Romantic Love
Understand their love language and speak it.
Singles, try and discover your partner’s love language and speak it. Couples, continue to express and speak your spouse’s love language in every way you can. Build on what you discovered about them when you were in courtship.
2. No love without giving
Some singles say, giving is not my thing, or we are not married yet, how can I give her/him gifts? It is abnormal to be in a relationship for a year and not to have given each other anything. It is not only ladies that should receive gifts; guys too should be given gifts. You show you care about someone when you give gifts to them.
In marriage, the gifts should continue and never cease. This is not about whether he/she really likes gifts. Everybody likes gifts. You express your love in gifts, not just in thoughts but in actions. The gifts don’t have to be expensive or elaborate, even though there’s nothing wrong with, once in a while, maybe on special occasions like a birthday or wedding anniversary, getting your spouse an expensive gift. It is the gesture and thoughtfulness in gifts that makes them a good way to express romantic love.
I will stop here and continue tomorrow. Stay blessed.
Let’s talk about something we all think about at some point: the journey from dating to saying “I do.” Whether you’re swiping right, already in a relationship, married, or just curious, you will learn something new today!
Dating Days
So, you’re dating. It’s like being on an adventure where you’re getting to know your partner. What makes them laugh, what dreams they’re chasing, and yeah, even what annoys them? Let me warn you, however, that you will never truly be able to know everything about them until you are MARRIED!
Exploration Time: Think of dating as your exploration mission. You’re learning about each other’s past, what you believe in, and what you both want down the road.
Talking It Out: Communication is key. It’s all about being real and honest with each other and building a strong foundation for whatever comes next. Talk about everything!
You Do You: It’s crucial to keep being yourself while you’re part of a duo. Balancing “me” and “we” is the real deal. Do not lose your identity because you are in love.
Dealing with Disagreements: Too many disagreements? Normal. How you tackle these moments can make or break your future together.
Taking the Leap
Getting married isn’t just about food and parties. It’s like leveling up in a game where you commit to tackle all of life’s levels together.
1. Deep Connections: Once you’re married, you share more, support more, and get each other on a deeper level. Your destinies become wedged together!
2. Money Talks: From who’s paying for dinner to saving for a dream vacation money matters start to shift once you’re married. Most quarrels emanate from money issues. It is good to settle in this area.
3. New Daily Life: It will no longer be just you, but now the two of you. You move from being selfish to selfless in other to be a good spouse!
After the “I Do”
Marriage is about growing on what you’ve already built, diving deeper into knowing and supporting each other.
Be Committed: Marriage means you’re in it together, come what may, with a stronger sense of commitment.
Deeper Chit-Chats: As life changes, the way you talk and connect evolves too. You must learn to be open, naked and not ashamed.
More Than Lovey-Dovey: Intimacy goes beyond the physical; it’s about connecting on all levels, being each other’s rock. Be there for yourselves, in the bedroom and out of the bedroom
Be on the same Page: You’ll face challenges, sure, but you’ll do it together, which only makes your bond stronger. One will chase a thousand, two will chase ten thousand!
Keep Dating!
Don’t let the flames of romance die out. Keeping the love alive is key to a happy marriage.
Date Nights: Keep dating each other, even after you’re married. It keeps things fun and fresh.
Talk the Talk: Keep the conversation going. Talk about your dreams, fears, and everything in between. The moment you stonewall, the wall is broken down and the devil will come in!
Support Squad: Support each other’s goals and dreams. It’s you two and Jesus against the world and the devil, remember?
Shake Things Up: Try new things together. It keeps the excitement alive. Be creative. Fight boredom. Do something new.
From dating to marriage, it’s about enjoying the journey together, through the ups and downs, and maintaining your joy all along the way!
Many single ladies and guys are finding it difficult to know who the perfect will of God is for them. The guy is cool, and the ladies seem pleasant but is he/she the one God has in mind for me?
This is one of the questions that has bothered the singles ever since, at least those that fear the Lord.
Some other carnal believers just think, ‘I am the one marrying here not God, so let me choose what I like and I will be good’. Nothing is farther from the truth than this.
For us married folk, I used to think, but we have the Holy Spirit and He knows all things but why are we not led by Him all the time? Especially in our marital affairs.
The answer is in the state of our mind.
It is our privilege as born-again believers to be led by the Holy Spirit. That is what distinguishes us from unbelievers. That is our ‘X’ factor. And you know what, whether you are single or married, the Holy Spirit delights to lead us.
Romans 8:14 NIV For those who are led by the Spirit of God are the children of God.
The problem is in the state of our minds. The Holy Spirit has information, wisdom, and strategies He wants to download to us, but our minds are too busy. He wants to tell us things, secrets about our spouses, about our intended partners.
We will however not be able to receive this leading because our minds are too busy. There is the normal state of mind, which is serene, calm and quiet. There is the abnormal state which is busy, filled with worries, evil thoughts, doubts, etc
God can only lead us in our relationship and marriage affairs if our mind is stayed on Him.
Isaiah 26:3 NIV You will keep in perfect peace those whose minds are steadfast, because they trust in you.
Isaiah 26:3 AMPC You will guard him and keep him in perfect and constant peace whose mind [both its inclination and its character] is stayed on You, because he commits himself to You, leans on You, and hopes confidently in You.
The Amplified Classic translation explains it well. God will only guard and guide us with His peace which is the umpire that tells us we are on the right track when choosing who we are to marry.
He will guide us with His peace when we know that the Holy Spirit is teaching us what to do in our marriage.
Our minds have to be stayed on the Word. We have to discipline our minds for it not to be wandering.
Our minds have to be focused on meditating on the word. If we want to enjoy the leading of the Holy Spirit, we have to actively keep our minds pondering, thinking, contemplating on His word, worship, and praying.
To know the voice of the Holy Spirit, we need to be ‘used’ to how He speaks.
Be disciplined with your mind. Think about what you are thinking about. Be quick to keep your mind stayed on the word. Keep your mind in worship, thinking of God’s goodness and His wondrous works. Plead the blood of Jesus on your mind to cleanse it from every dead works of unrighteousness.
Let your mind be free enough for the Holy Spirit to communicate with you and you being able to receive whatever He wants to say.
The other day, I was talking our first son and his best friend, and my question was “When are you guys getting married? Both of them just smiled and replied with an expression like, “Marriage? Who is thinking of that?” When I was my son’s age, I was already “toasting” Pastor Sophia!
Why do guys hesitate today? Why does it seem marriage is the last thing on their mind?
Let’s dive into this this morning.
The world today is a fast-paced world, where instant gratification is often a click away, but relationships and marriage seem to be following a different timeline!
This phenomenon has sparked curiosity and, at times, frustration among young ladies wanting to walk down the aisle. So, why are guys taking their sweet time to commit or walk down the aisle?
Did you miss yesterday’s devotional? Read it below!
The young man today is fiercely independent, valuing personal growth and career ambitions. Many young men are delaying marriage to focus on establishing themselves professionally and financially. This may nit be unconnected that there is “hunger” in the land! Building a career before building a home resonates strongly. For married couples, ensure there is a balance between you career and home! Family comes first!
2. Perfect Timing
The concept of “perfect timing” is another factor contributing to the delay. Guys are more attuned to the idea of timing in their lives, often waiting for the perfect moment when all stars align – career stability, emotional readiness, and finding the ideal partner. This pursuit of the perfect scenario can lead to postponements in making significant relationship milestones.
After wedding, ask married couples, three will be more responsibilities, but this also makes you to sit up and harness every grace and opportunities available to take care of your family!
I will stop here today! Watch out for the second part tomorrow!
We live in a world of constant noise – pings from social media, pressure to keep up with the latest trends, and an unrelenting expectation to be everything to everyone. It’s easy to get lost in that chaos, losing sight of who we truly are. Whether you’re single or married, there’s one prayer that strikes a chord deep within: “Lord, Deliver Me From Me.”
Psa 139:23 (MSG) Investigate my life, O God, find out everything about me; Cross-examine and test me, get a clear picture of what I’m about;
We’ve all been there, staring at our reflection, wondering why we can’t just be a little more like this or a little less like that. In our pursuit of perfection, we become our own harshest critics and biggest roadblocks. But here’s a liberating truth: It’s okay not to have it all figured out. It’s okay to be a work in progress, constantly evolving and growing.
For the singles out there, society often makes it seem like you’re on a ticking clock, that you need to have your life mapped out with a fairy-tale ending. But guess what? Your worth isn’t tied to your relationship status. Your journey is uniquely yours, and it’s not a race against anyone else. Praying “Lord, deliver me from me” is a powerful way to let go of those self-imposed pressures and anxieties. It’s about asking God to help you embrace your singleness as a season of growth, discovery, and self-love. Being single isn’t a waiting room for happiness; it’s a chapter where you get to write the rules, discover your passions, and build an unshakable relationship with yourself and God.
Now’s your golden chance to dive into what makes you tick, explore new hobbies, and figure out your dreams – just you, no plus one needed. Use this solo time to get tight with God, finding out who you are in His eyes, which is pretty amazing and so much bigger than just being someone’s other half. Don’t just solo it; build your tribe of friends, family, and mentors – these connections are priceless. Got goals? Now’s the time to chase them down, whether it’s your career or learning something new. And most importantly, take care of your heart and mind, and find joy in your own company.
For the married folks, this prayer is equally potent. Marriage is a beautiful dance of togetherness and individuality, but it’s easy to lose yourself in the duo. “Lord, deliver me from me” is a heartfelt plea to maintain your essence while being an integral part of a union. It’s about asking for the grace to grow together without losing sight of who you are as individuals. It’s a prayer for patience, understanding, and the strength to be your partner’s ally, not their adversary. Remember, your marriage is as unique as a fingerprint, and there’s no one-size-fits-all formula. Embrace your journey, with all its twists and turns, and know that it’s okay to be imperfectly perfect.
Just because you’re hooked doesn’t mean you vanish into the “we” – keep that awesome “you” shining bright. Picture your marriage like a bike ride; you both get to steer and enjoy the view. Living with your lover means patience is your new best friend. Think of your spouse as your co-conspirator in this adventure of life, not the opponent you need to outwit or outlast. Embrace the one-of-a-kind life you two are living together, and enjoy it!
Whether you’re single or married, young or old, the prayer “Lord, Deliver Me From Me” is a powerful reminder that we’re not alone in our struggles. It’s an acknowledgment that sometimes, the person we need to be delivered from is ourselves. So, let’s take a deep breath and step into this journey with open hearts. Let’s be kind to ourselves, embrace our flaws, and celebrate our victories, no matter how small. After all, life isn’t about having all the answers; it’s about trusting the One who does. Remember, you’re not alone. We’re all in this together, learning, growing, and finding our way. And in those moments when you feel overwhelmed, just whisper that simple yet profound prayer, “Lord, Deliver Me From Me,” and watch as peace fills your heart and guides your steps.
If all singles and married couples can master these 5 points, there will be fewer issues in their relationships. These are just the basic things; if you walk with the Holy Spirit, He will tell you how to tailor things to meet your specific needs in time.
He is the best companion ever in relationships and marriage. He knows what you and your partner need and knows exactly what wisdom to use and how to navigate the complex issues and nature of your relationship and marriage.
Here are the 5 tips:
Master communication.
As a single, have conversations that reveal your true self and encourage the other person to do the same. Your conversations are for connection, not just surface talk. For married couples, keep communication lines open and honest. Share your feelings, dreams, and fears without reservations. Your conversations are to deepen your connection, ensuring both of you feel heard and understood.
Understand yourself
As a single, be clear on who you are and what you want. What makes you happy. Be clear about your non-negotiable. This clarity will help you in finding and keeping the one person with whom you can truly do life together. As a couple, keep growing. Personal growth is essential to the health of your marriage. Also, encourage each other’s ambitions and passions.
Handle Conflicts Smartly
As singles, know that disagreements are a part of your journey. If conflict arises, tackle it with maturity and understanding, knowing that it’s not about winning the argument but respecting your differences. As couples, see disagreements as a means to get to know each other better. Work at solving conflicts to benefit the relationship and not just the individual.
Cherish and value your independence.
As a single, embrace and enjoy your single life, pursue your passions and interests, have friends outside your relationship. As couples, maintain personal interests and do things you enjoy. This contributes to a more healthy and vibrant relationship, which allows both partners to bring fresh experiences and insights into the marriage.
Align your goals.
As a single, nurture the vision you share together for the future, whatever it is. Being on the same wavelength can prevent a lot of heartache eventually. As a couple, constantly check if your goals and dreams are still in sync. As you grow, so do your dreams. Ensuring that you are still heading in the same direction strengthens your bond and makes your journey together fulfilling and exciting.
We have established that a good number of children of God cope with one form of abuse in their relationships or marriages. This is not meant to be so. Jesus Christ paid the price on the cross for me and you to enjoy a blissful marriage. It is the devil that is the thief that comes to steal, kill, and destroy.
However, if we can labour in the word of God, attend to God’s word, give it the needed attention, meditate on it, and confess it just like Psalm 1 instruct, we will be like a well-watered garden in our relationships and marriage.
Psalm 1:2-3 ESV but his delight is in the law of the Lord, and on his law he meditates day and night. [3] He is like a tree planted by streams of water that yields its fruit in its season, and its leaf does not wither. In all that he does, he prospers.
God’s word promises us we will prosper in all that we do including in our relationships and marriages.
Whatever we see in the world, we can see it in our world.
So let’s delve into God’s word to see what He promises us. I have carefully written out confessions for every married person and for singles not enjoying bliss in their marriage and relationships.
These confessions are based on Ephesians 5:18-30
Father, I thank you because I am continually being filled with the Holy Spirit. I walk not according to the dictates of my flesh but according to the dictates and desires of the spirit. My thoughts are filled with godly thoughts. I have a merry heart, I am always singing and making melody in my heart onto God. I am always full of thanksgiving. I thank God for my spouse/ partner. I am grateful.
We are submissive to one another out of reverence for Christ.
As singles, take this confession, I thank you Lord for this relationship. As a lady, I give myself to learning how to eventually submit. I am gracious and I grow in my relationship with the Lord.
As a guy, I practice unconditional love. I learn from the Lord how He loved not in a selfish way but in a godly way. I don’t desecrate her body but respect her as a child of the most high God. We put God first in our relationship.
Father, I thank you because I am continually being filled with the Holy Spirit. I walk not according to the dictates of my flesh but according to the dictates and desires of the spirit. My thoughts are filled with Godly thoughts. I have a merry heart, I am always singing and making melody in my heart onto God. I am always full of thanksgiving. I thank God for my spouse/ partner. I am grateful.
As a wife, I submit myself to my husband just as I submit to the Lord. Having this understanding that just as Christ is the head of the church, my husband is my head. I submit to my husband in all things irrespective of how I feel. My submission is in obedience to God and He will defend me. I graciously make my opinion known to him but allow him to have the last say. I recognize that anything that has two heads is a monster. I am not afraid to submit to my husband but I trust God to work in him. I am a God-fearing wife. I take everything to God in prayer.
As a husband, I love my wife just as Christ loved the Church and gave Himself up for her. Just as Jesus was humble and died for the church so I am willing to die for my wife. I give up my rights as the head and become a servant leader. This I do to make my wife holy, better, smarter, blossom, and thrive, this I do by following the scriptures. I present her to myself radiant. Labouring in prayers for her to be a helpful meet indeed for me. I help to bring her to maturity by investing in her spiritually, mentally, and emotionally and exchanging her weakness for the strength that is in Christ.
As a husband, I love my wife as my own body because I recognize that when I love my wife, I am loving myself. I nourish and cherish my wife with love, attention, and affection. Jesus has shown me by example how to love my wife unconditionally. I leave my ideologies or the ways and methods I learned from my background and embrace the new ways Christ shows me.
Our marriages and relationships are blissful. Our lives are full of the Lord’s blessings because we give no place to strife. We deeply love ourselves and God is revealing to us new ways to submit and love ourselves so help us, God.
Be diligent in taking this confession and see the blessings thereof.
Imagine if you take this confession every day for the rest of this year.
Once upon a time, in a bustling city filled with bright lights and fast-paced lives, there lived a young couple named Buddy and Stella.
They were deeply in love and committed to building a relationship grounded in understanding and connection.
One evening, as they sat on the rooftop of their house, Stella shared her dreams and aspirations with Buddy.
Instead of merely hearing her words, Buddy decided to listen truly. He put away his phone, looked into Stella’s eyes, and let her pour out her heart. He nodded, smiled, and used his body language to show he was fully present and engaged.
When Stella finished speaking, Buddy took a moment to gather his thoughts. He summarized and rephrased what she had shared, ensuring he understood her correctly.
Stella’s face lit up with excitement. She felt truly seen and understood by Buddy’s active listening. It made her feel valued and cherished, knowing that he was genuinely interested in her passions and dreams.
They delved into conversations about life, faith, and their shared purpose. Questions like, “What impact do you hope to make in the world?” and “What are your wildest dreams and how can I support you in achieving them?” became the fuel for their connection.
In moments of vulnerability, they acknowledged each other’s emotions, just as Jesus did with compassion and understanding.
When Buddy faced setbacks in his career, Stella listened without judgment, providing a safe space for him to express his frustrations. And when Stella experienced self-doubt in her emotions, Buddy offered unwavering support and reminded her of her inner strength!
Most importantly, Buddy and Stella learned to avoid interruptions and assumptions. They realized that true understanding required patience and the willingness to hear each other out completely. They were quick to listen and slow to speak, just as the Scriptures advised.
Their love story continued to flourish as they embraced the art of radical listening. Their relationship became a haven of trust, where they could freely express themselves and find solace in the other’s understanding.
They discovered that active listening was the key to unlocking a love that transcends generations—a love that speaks the language of the heart and nurtures the souls of both singles and couples.
And so, their love story continues to inspire others, reminding them of the power of radical listening. This power can ignite flames of love and understanding in the hearts of a generation yearning for authentic connection.
For Singles:
Are you actively practicing radical listening in your friendships and potential romantic relationships? How can you incorporate the principles of active listening into your interactions?
What are your deepest passions, dreams, and aspirations? How can you find someone who will truly listen and support you in pursuing those dreams?
Reflecting on your past relationships, were there instances where active listening could have made a positive difference? How can you improve your listening skills in future relationships?
For Couples:
How well do you currently practice active listening in your relationship? Are there areas where you can improve to foster deeper understanding and connection?
What open-ended questions can you ask your partner to foster meaningful conversations and explore each other’s dreams and aspirations?
How do you acknowledge and validate each other’s emotions in moments of vulnerability? Are there any specific ways you can enhance your empathy and support for each other?
For Singles and Couples:
Reflecting on the story, what is one action you can take today to become a more active and empathetic listener in your relationships?
How can you create intentional moments of undistracted listening with your partner or potential partner?
Are there any assumptions or interruptions that you need to be more mindful of in your communication? How can you practice being quick to listen and slow to speak?
Abuse in relationships and marriage is the most common cause of separation and divorce in marriage.
As Singles, you should watch out for signs of abuse and be courageous enough to take the necessary steps.
First, let’s look at the meaning of abuse.
Abuse means treating a loved one or partner with violence, disrespect, cruelty, harm, or force. When someone treats their partner in any of these ways, it’s called an abusive relationship. Abuse in a relationship can be physical, sexual, verbal, financial, or emotional. Or it could be all of these.
In an abusive relationship or marriage, it takes a positive mindset and courage to confront the abuser. Having healthy self-esteem will also help to know that you are not to be abused but loved and cherished. No one should be a victim, whether male or female.
When a partner is showing signs of abuse it is not alright to ignore it. An abuser in relationships will be an abuser in marriage.
There are many reasons for being an abusive partner, a major cause is a dysfunctional background. Most people who abuse their partner have been abused and they usually have a deep-seated emotional issue or immaturity.
In an abusive marriage, the husband or wife has a power imbalance and uses manipulation, intimidation, threats, and physical or emotional violence to control the other.
Abuse in relationships and marriage is often characterized by extreme jealousy, possessiveness, and a lack of respect for the other partner’s boundaries.
A lot of marriages go through abuse of various kinds and different degrees. When violence and physical abuse are involved, a professional therapist must be sought.
The use of scriptures to pray and make daily declarations and confessions is also known to get amazing results.
Declaring the word and speaking the Word over the abuser helps in rewiring the brain.
Genesis 1:1-2 (KJV) In the beginning God created the heaven and the earth. And the earth was without form, and void; and darkness was upon the face of the deep. And the Spirit of God moved upon the face of the waters.
God spoke His Word to a situation that was without form and void. You too can speak to that situation.
Singles should not go on to marry a partner who is already showing serious signs of abuse.
Based on 1 Corinthians 13:4-7, “Love is patient, love is kind. It does not envy, it does not boast.”
Your lover or spouse will test your patience! Just telling you ahead!
Throughout a relationship, there are times when you’ll need patience and times you’ll need grace to acknowledge each other’s kindness.
Patience and kindness are the strings that bind all your excesses together, helping you through every uphill and making it easier to celebrate every high.
It encourages couples to appreciate each other’s gifts, navigate through each other’s flaws with understanding, and dig in with care.
2. Love and Keep Loving
Each One of You Also Must Love His Wife as He Loves Himself, and the Wife Must Respect Her Husband.
Ephesians 5:33 encourages wives and husbands to respect each other, which is the essence of mutual admiration and understanding.
When you respect each other, you create a safe environment for your love to grow. You can disagree with respect, appreciate your partner’s opinions, feelings, and well-being, forming a strong base for any relationship.
When you understand this, you will be able love and keep loving!
3. Practice forgiveness
Colossians 3:13 reminds us, “Bear with each other and forgive one another; if any of you has a grievance against someone. Forgive as the Lord forgave you.”
The power of forgiveness allows relationships to heal, grow, and mature, building a foundation of trust. Grudges create barriers to love; forgiveness breaks them down and creates a bridge to the other person, a bridge to the heart.
My dear couple, avoid strife like a plague! You don’t want to dine with strife in any way!
4. Be honest and transparent
What is the foundation of all relationships? Proverbs 24:26 says, “An honest answer is like a kiss on the lips.”
Honest communication is the lifeline of relationships. It builds trust, dissipates misunderstandings, and gives partners a clearer path.
When we love another person, we need to know that in their love for us, they will be honest, and we can be honest with them. Then, the lines of communication are truly open!
Be sincere! You really don’t want to be caught in the web of deception!
5. God cannot be wrong!
She was intelligent, ambitious, and the love of your life. You were intelligent, ambitious, and the love of her life. God was involved. In the journey of your unfolding relationship, keep referring to the encounter you had with God before you married your spouse! That will stabilise you and remove all doubts!
These five Biblical pieces of advice can help you and your partner enrich your relationship and build a loving, respectful union that can stand the test of time and flourish in times of joy and challenge.
Whether you’re navigating the early stages of love or seeking to rekindle the flame in a long-term relationship, these timeless teachings will help you in your relationship or marriage.
A successful relationship leading to a wedding and a successful marriage as a couple requires a certain type of humility!
It is interesting how you start a relationship and you are sure you already know your lover only to find out that you are clueless.
It is equally amazing, how your solid pride about being an expert loverboy or girl is completely shattered after the wedding. You suddenly discover that all your dexterity as a fantastic and romantic human is useless and you can’t seem to please your spouse! How humbling!
Now you are married or in a relationship and your dream of living happily ever after has turned into living sadly daily!
The relationship or marriage is riddled with persistent quarrels that seem unending. Strife has become a part of the home. The once lover/husband who used to be funny than Brother Shaggy has become a shadow of himself and can no longer make you smile.
The once happy babe who laughs at any little effort has hibernated into a cocoon, which seems sealed.
What do you do, either in courtship or marriage?
You must come into that humbling space and tell God you hardly know the one you are married to. Tell God to forgive your assumptions and teach you how to love your fiancee, husband, or wife!
The anointing we have teaches us all things! Including how to love appropriately! 1 Jn 2:27
Humble yourself and pray that prayer. Read books, get a relationship or marriage mentor, and become accountable! Check some of the courses we have HERE and make an effort to invest in your relationship or marriage! You cannot just be looking while things deteriorate! I usually say it is better to invest in your relationship or marriage than to pay a lawyer to handle separation or divorce! That will never be your portion in Jesus’ name!
If these are not in place, you are not seeking a solution!
The devil doesn’t want you to live in peace! All he wants to do is scatter that union. Don’t allow him. Commit to fighting for your relationship or marriage by doing the right things, humbling yourself, and reaching out to God to help you! Good morning!
We started this amazing topic yesterday and we will be concluding this morning.
To know and experience God you need to be still. There is a level of stillness required to be able to relate and know God for who He is.
When you are still, you most likely can trust more. Especially if it is stillness in your mind and body too. When we make haste and are in a hurry, we are not still. We make mistakes.
In a state of stillness, God can perform His glorious works in our lives.
God had to put Adam to sleep when He was to make Eve.
Is 30:5a ‘In quietness and confidence lies your strength’
We exchange our weakness for His strength when we are quiet and still, trusting in God.
Dear SIngles, learn to be still. There is an intentional quietness to know Him. Quietness and stillness that come from a place of brokenness. A place and state of total and absolute surrendering to God’s will.
The partner is not yet around. Yes, it is NOT YET. He or she that will come, will come. Enjoy yourself, relax, get to know God more, and put your mind at rest. God is in control. Be still and know that God is God.
Let’s search the scriptures. In Isaiah 46:10 ‘ Be still and know that I am God.
All married couples, listen. You cannot afford to have sleepless nights over some issues. Avoid that temptation. God is never in competition with man. The Bible says He never sleeps nor slumbers. If God is awake then you are protected
You know God on your knees and in worship. It is when you are still that you can see the wonders of the Lord. He will always take charge and be in control of every situation we commit into his hands.
Place your husbands, wives, children, parents, and in-laws into His hands and leave them there.
Don’t worry about that situation that is causing you sleepless nights.
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One of the hardest things to do as a Single or married is to be still. Especially in this fast-paced life.
It seems we just got to do ‘something’. Unfortunately, this ‘ something’ is not always the right, good, or best option. We always think and take issues into our own hands. Unfortunately, we don’t get too far.
I think every single and married person should take time to read the whole of Psalm 46. It is such a beautiful portion of the scripture that offers comfort in whatever situation we find ourselves in.
The Psalm opens by telling us in verse I
God is our refuge and strength, a very present help in trouble Ps 46:1KJV
Psalms 46:1 NLT God is our refuge and strength, always ready to help in times of trouble.
Psalms 46:1 HCSB God is our refuge and strength, a helper who is always found in times of trouble.
God is described as a refuge and strength.
God is both a hiding place of refuge from the storms of life and the strength to carry us through whatever the situation is.
As singles, what is the situation you are in or facing? Is it a delay beyond your understanding? Is it a heartbreak? Is it confusion about making a decision? Is the future so bleak you feel so unsure? Is it a failed engagement with no explanations?
Whatever the situation is, God through the writer of this Psalm is introducing Himself as refuge and strength, a very present help in trouble.
He is your refuge and strength. That strength could be in the form of wisdom
Remember the Psalm says in another translation, that He is always ready to help in times of trouble.
The question is are you ready to receive His help? His help is not automatic.
The police services are ready to help, but until you call or dial 911, you can’t enjoy their help.
As married couples, what is that trouble? Health, financial, Emotional, a cheating spouse, a spouse you just don’t understand?
You have to receive Him as strength and refuge. You can’t enjoy peace amid crisis until you learn to trust and call upon Him for help.
I learned something once a situation is in court, you rest about it. You allow the court to decide, if not you could be charged with contempt of court
Once you have called upon Jesus, leave it with Him. Let Him handle it.
What most of us do is, we think we are trusting and making Him our refuge and strength, and then we start worrying and trying to handle things in our wisdom and strength.
God’s strength, method, and ways will be different from ours.
Trust Him and leave the matter with Him.
God bless. We will continue tomorrow by God’s Grace
Introduction: What does a woman want from her husband? It’s pretty straightforward: she wants to be heard, supported, respected, and loved. She’s looking for a partner who’s there for her, really listens when she talks, and stands by her side no matter what. It’s about being teammates in this big game called life, sharing laughs, tackling problems together, and having each other’s backs.
Being Heard One of the key things a woman wants from her husband is to be truly heard. This doesn’t just mean listening to her words but understanding the feelings behind them. It’s about giving her your full attention, showing interest in her thoughts and concerns, and responding with empathy. When a woman feels heard, she feels connected and valued in the relationship.
Support Support is another cornerstone of what a woman seeks from her husband. Whether it’s backing her career moves, helping out with household tasks, or being there emotionally during tough times, your support tells her she’s not alone. It’s about being her cheerleader, her confidant, and her safe haven.
Respect Respect is the bedrock of any healthy relationship. This means valuing her opinions, acknowledging her contributions to the family, and treating her with kindness and consideration. When a woman feels respected, she feels safe and esteemed, which fosters deep trust in the marriage.
Partnership Marriage is a partnership. It’s about sharing responsibilities, making decisions together, and supporting each other’s goals and dreams. When you work as a team, you build a strong foundation for a lasting and fulfilling relationship.
Love and Affection Beyond everything, a woman wants to feel loved and cherished. Small gestures of affection, kind words, and quality time together go a long way in keeping the romance alive. It’s about showing her she’s special, not just on special occasions but every day.
Conclusion The keys to what a woman wants from her husband are quite simple: listen, support, respect, partner, and love. These fundamental actions create a nurturing and joyful marriage. By focusing on these aspects, husbands can build a stronger, more loving relationship with their wives, filled with mutual respect and deep connection.
Let me open you up to today’s devotional by quoting this scripture.
Philippians 4:8 AMPC For the rest, brethren, whatever is true, whatever is worthy of reverence and is honorable and seemly, whatever is just, whatever is pure, whatever is lovely and lovable, whatever is kind and winsome and gracious, if there is any virtue and excellence, if there is anything worthy of praise, think on and weigh and take account of these things [fix your minds on them].
When we learn to obey the word of God, things happen for us in the positive.
Whether married or single, we are to intentionally find good things about our spouses to fill our minds with. Filling our minds with the good quality of our spouses keeps us kind, tender-hearted, and forgiving towards them.
As Singles, when your fiancee or fiance is trying hard to please you or your spouse is doing their best to make the marriage work, you don’t ignore their efforts.
Don’t say, that if I appreciate their efforts now, they will relax and not continue making efforts. Don’t say, that until I see 100% improvement, I will not acknowledge the efforts made.
This mindset is very wrong.
Celebrate and acknowledge the little efforts. What we appreciate, appreciates and what we don’t appreciate depreciates.
Appreciation also begets respect and willingness to do more. If all you see in your spouse are the errors, their faults, their shortcomings, and their weaknesses, then something is wrong.
If you are looking for faults, you will find them. Whatever you are looking for is what you find.
Even with the little errors, you can overlook and ignore, you use a magnifying lens to focus on them.
Remember, you are not perfect either. Neither are you easy to also live with. Fill your mind with the good in your spouse.
As singles, you can write out those good qualities in your partner and keep them before you so that you can appreciate them. Appreciation should be verbal, don’t internalize your appreciation.
When you start practicing these as a single, it becomes a habit that will help you in your marriage
As a couple, I don’t believe your spouse won’t have any good qualities. I am sure you will be able to find at least one good quality in them.
Focus on that. Begin to praise, appreciate, and celebrate that good quality and before long there will be more qualities to appreciate.
Practice these and your marriage will enjoy bliss, joy, peace, understanding, patience, and love.
You may want to ask, so what about the weaknesses? We don’t get better all at once. We get better gradually. It is one step after the other.
In today’s world, it is so easy to fall into the temptation of getting all worked up or worried or anxious about so many things.
Our relationships as singles are not spared from this strategy of hell to snuff joy, understanding, and bliss from them.
You will always see ladies more beautiful, more caring, more understanding, richer, and more respectful than your fiance or fiancee. Make up your mind with the help of God to stay focused on your partner.
You will always have desires, especially of material things. Don’t focus on what you don’t have and get anxious or agitated about those things
Celebrate your partner. Be intentional about seeing the best in each other.
Appreciate what you have and leave what you don’t have.
The same goes for us Couples. Other ladies and men will not suddenly become ugly. There will still be countless good men out there. Don’t compare the qualities of other women and men to your spouse.
Accept and love your spouse the way they are.
We are all a work in progress. The human tendency is to complain about what God has given you. The more you complain the more you will have reasons to complain. The more you appreciate your spouse the more grateful you are for them.
Don’t become anxious, especially about the good things of life, you don’t have YET. A pregnant woman does not envy the woman carrying her baby. They both carry something, it’s just a matter of time and the pregnant one will also carry her baby.
These things are not bad in themself but when you have your mind focused on them, they tend to choke the bliss out of your marriage.
Philippians 4:6 NIV Do not be anxious about anything, but in every situation, by prayer and petition, with thanksgiving, present your requests to God.
Enjoy your spouse. Thank God for the spouse God has given you. What you lack now, will become plenty only if you have the right attitude of thanksgiving.
Material prosperity will come. Let us learn to enjoy ourselves on the way to our destination.
God does not want us to be worried and get preoccupied with things we don’t have.
He expects us to make our request known to our maker through prayers.
Enjoy your spouse. Enjoy your children. Enjoy where you are and what you have in the present.
