Oftentimes, people walk away from toxic relationships, unhealthy attachments, or bad habits, thinking that the battle is over. But leaving is only the first step. The real challenge is filling that empty space with something better. It’s easy to think that once you’ve cut ties with the wrong person or situation, everything will automatically be fine. But if you don’t intentionally fill your heart with positive, God-centered things, you might find yourself slipping back into old patterns even after you might have vowed that it would never happen again.
“When an unclean spirit goes out of a man, it passes through dry places seeking rest, and does not find it. Then it says, ‘I will return to my house from which I came.’ And when it comes, it finds it empty, swept, and put in order. Then it goes and brings with it seven other spirits more wicked than itself, and they enter and dwell there; and the last state of that man is worse than the first.” — Matthew 12:43-45 (NKJV)
This is the very point Jesus was making in Matthew 12. A man was freed from an unclean spirit, but when the spirit returned, it found the house empty. Without something better taking its place, the man’s situation worsened. It’s a pattern we see in relationships, too. If you leave one behind but don’t fill your life with healing, purpose, and spiritual growth, you open yourself up to emptiness and vulnerability. This emptiness can lead you to crave the wrong things: unhealthy attention, distractions, or even another toxic relationship.
Instead of just walking away from bad relationships, it’s crucial to intentionally build a life that’s full of what truly matters—God’s wisdom, His love, and a deeper sense of purpose. Focus on nurturing your relationship with God, growing emotionally, and investing time with people who help you grow in faith. Stay busy with purpose, serve God like never before, and pursue personal growth. When you fill your life with the right things, you create a strong foundation, leaving no room for the wrong things to creep back in.
Leaving behind what’s wrong is an important step, but the real work begins after that. If you don’t fill the empty space with God’s truth, His presence, and a sense of purpose, you are at risk of falling into that same cycle. Today, make the decision to fill your life with His presence so that when love comes, you are not settling out of emptiness but embracing something beautiful because you are whole, ready, and aligned with God’s perfect plan for you.
Some people are constantly trying to earn love. They over-give, over-explain, and overcompensate—just to be seen, heard, and chosen. They do beyond what they naturally would have done simply because they want to prove they are worth loving. Maybe they grew up in a family where love wasn’t freely given—everyone worked to receive love. When you do right, you’re loved; when you make a mistake, love is withdrawn. And so that’s all they’ve known all their lives—working just to earn love. Well, here’s the truth: You were never meant to beg for what should be freely given.
“But God demonstrates His own love toward us, in that while we were still sinners, Christ died for us.” Romans 5:8 [NKJV]
You see that? Love is freely given.
For singles, if you constantly feel the need to prove your value to someone, that’s not love—it may well be a performance. Love doesn’t make you walk on eggshells. Love doesn’t manipulate you with silence or keep you in confusion. If you always feel like you’re “not enough” unless you do more, give more, or become someone else, step back and ask: Is this love or emotional slavery? You still have time to walk out of that relationship. The right person will recognise your worth without needing a presentation.
This is not a stamp of approval to remain the way you are—weakness and all. Work on being a better version of yourself, keep growing, etc., but don’t do these things simply because you are trying to buy someone’s love.
This can also creep in subtly in marriage. In such situations, you start feeling invisible—like your efforts go unnoticed, like you have to compete with work, children, or even social media just to get your spouse’s attention. And you can start feeling empty and all. But remember this: You are valuable, even when you’re unseen. And sometimes, the healing starts when you stop trying to earn love and start receiving it the way God intended—freely, confidently, and without fear.
See Romans 5:8 again: “…while we were still sinners, Christ died for us.” That’s love—undeserved, unearned, unconditional.
Let’s stop shrinking ourselves to fit into someone’s frail idea of love. And you absolutely don’t have to fight to be loved.
The position of a man plays a crucial role in his destiny. Many things we pray about that seem delayed are not necessarily being withheld by God. Rather, they require us to be in the right place to receive them.
Divine positioning is key to unlocking God’s promises. Without it, a person may struggle unnecessarily, even for the simplest things. In Genesis 12:1, God told Abram “Get thee out of thy country, and from thy kindred, and from thy father’s house, unto a land that I will shew thee.”
God had great plans for Abram, but his current location limited those plans. The wonders and blessings God had in store for him could only manifest after he moved to the place God had ordained for him. Sometimes, a shift in location physically, spiritually, or even mentally is all that is needed for a breakthrough.
One can work tirelessly and still have nothing to show for it. At such moments, the question to ask is: Am I in the right place? The right place is not just about geography; it is about being in the center of God’s will.
When Jesus healed a blind man in Bethsaida, He first led him out of the town before performing the miracle. Could it be that the town was filled with unbelief? Could the atmosphere have hindered the man’s faith and delayed his healing? Jesus knew that the right positioning was necessary for the man’s miracle.
What are you trusting God for? A new job? A spouse? A house? A business breakthrough? Sometimes, the key is not more effort or even more prayers but divine positioning.
Being divinely positioned means being aligned with God’s plan, will, and agenda. Outside of His plan, life becomes a struggle. But when we are where He wants us to be, grace flows effortlessly, doors open, and favor abounds.
Pray today, “Lord, position me in the right place, at the right time, for my destiny to be fulfilled.”
As a single man or lady, you sometimes are all about yourself alone. Certain decisions are made without considering anyone. When you get married, that narrative will change. Whatever you do, you put your spouse first.
What to eat, what to wear, when to return home, where to go, how much to spend, what to buy, etc.
When taking such decisions, you will have to consider your partner.
Mk 10:8 [ESV] and the two shall become one flesh.’ So they are no longer two but one flesh.
2. Forgiveness.
There is no place where offence is frequent other than marriage. The reason is clear. You get hurt by the one you love so dearly.
Marriage is not a place to keep malice. As a matter of fact, in marriage, you forgive ahead.
Who do you think can offend you 490 times in a day?
Who? Your spouse. You don’t believe, right? Ask a married person beside you.
Mat 18v22 [NIV] Jesus answered, “I tell you, not seven times, but seventy-seven times.
3. Assumptions.
Assumption is the lowest level of knowledge. In marriage, couples don’t just make babies; they talk.
They talk about everything.
What you discussed in courtship, you discuss again in marriage. Life happens, and seasons change, so the conversation you had last year may need to be revisited this year.
The moment communication dies, assumptions set in.
You can’t live your life based on hearsay. Always ask.
Oh, I am not the talking type. Really? And you want to get married?
If you don’t talk to your spouse, someone else will do the talking.
Gen 3:1 [ESV] Now the serpent was more crafty than any other beast of the field that the LORD God had made. He said to the woman, “Did God actually say, ‘You shall not eat of any tree in the garden’?”
4. Teamwork.
Marriage is not a competition where you want to find out who the better parent is. You are a team. It is both of you against the world, not against each other.
You don’t have to always have the final say; that’s why you are a team.
Carry him along. Carry her along. That way, it will take extra effort for anyone to come between you.
I am an independent person. I like to do things my own way. That is very good for your level, but the moment you agree to sign the dotted lines, that mentality has to change.
Gen 2v24 [NLT] This explains why a man leaves his father and mother and is joined to his wife, and the two are united into one.
This devotional is a continuation from yesterday. If you missed it, go here
5. Overwhelmed with Responsibilities:
Life’s pressures—work, finances, family obligations—can leave men feeling overwhelmed and unable to commit further. Philippians 4:6-7 encourages us, “Do not be anxious about anything, but in every situation, by prayer and petition, present your requests to God.” Supporting him spiritually can lighten his load. Being overwhelmed is another reason why men often delay decisions.
6. Lack of Clarity:
Sometimes, men delay because they lack clarity about what they want or where the relationship is headed. James 1:5 promises, “If any of you lacks wisdom, you should ask God, who gives generously to all without finding fault.” Encourage open conversations while trusting God for direction.
7. Fear of Losing Freedom:
Commitment requires sacrifice, and some men often delay for fear of losing their independence. Remind him that true freedom comes from surrendering to God’s plan. Galatians 5:1 says, “It is for freedom that Christ has set us free.”
8. Avoidance of Conflict:
Men may delay addressing issues to avoid uncomfortable conversations or potential conflict. However, unresolved problems only grow worse. Proverbs 27:5-6 states, “Better is open rebuke than hidden love.” Gentle honesty can help resolve tension constructively.
9. Testing Compatibility:
Some men delay commitment because they’re still assessing whether the relationship is right. Amos 3:3 asks, “Do two walk together unless they have agreed to do so?” Building mutual understanding and shared values can reassure both partners.
10. Misaligned Priorities:
For some, career, hobbies, or other pursuits take precedence over relationships. A man who prioritizes worldly success over relational health may need redirection. Matthew 6:33 reminds us, “Seek first his kingdom and his righteousness, and all these things will be given to you as well.” Encourage him to align his priorities with God’s will.
