How to Become Responsible Lovers. Over the years, from counseling experiences, and even from the scriptures, one surefire reason for a marriage to fail is a lack of mentoring or tutelage.
God’s kingdom is so intricately planned that you are not expected to remain isolated.
Here’s what God says:
God setteth the solitary in families: he bringeth out those which are bound with chains: but the rebellious dwell in a dry land. (Psalms 68:6 KJV)
In His wisdom, God has surrounded us not only with physical families but also with spiritual families. You must be able to recognize and stay with your spiritual family.
God has placed a man or woman over you to whom you can seek knowledge and who will be able to speak into your life during storms.
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There are times when you are confronted with a problem, but the solution is only a sentence or two away in the lips of a God-anointed servant.
How to Become Responsible Lovers
This is why I am often afraid of couples who have no one to hold them accountable. I am often afraid of couples that do not have mentors. Someone correctly stated that you need mentors to avoid life’s tormentors!
Now I’ll explain why it’s critical to maintain accountability in marriage.
There are instances when couples seek counseling and there is just one way to go after listening to them.
So I’d like to pose the question,
“Who do you think is your spouse’s mentor?”
It is always disappointing when the response is
“Nobody, sir!”
As a result, I frequently reword the question,
“Who does your husband admire? “Who can speak to him?”
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Then comes a sadder response.
“Nobody, sir!”
Then I’d give it one more shot.
“What about his parents?” I would ask.
“He doesn’t pay attention to his parents!” Nobody can communicate with him!”
At this moment, the situation appears to be dire… since it is difficult to assist a solitary person!
A soul that has been disenfranchised is a vulnerable soul.
One of the most important aspects of marriage is the question of accountability!
How to Become Responsible Lovers
Let me close with this verse:
Without counsel purposes are disappointed: but in the multitude of counsellors they are established. (Proverbs 15:22 KJV)
Purposes might be sincere, but when they are unaided, they can lead to frustration and disappointment.
Check it out in The Message translation:
Refuse good advice and watch your plans fail; take good counsel and watch them succeed. (Proverbs 15:22 Message)
Good morning! Your relationships and marriages are blessed!
Today, we’ll look at the signs of an unhappy or dying relationship and marriage. This will allow us to diagnose and eliminate these problems swiftly. Let’s get started.
Signs of a Dying Relationship or Marriage
1. When trust has died and has been cremated
The foundation of any marriage’s success is trust.
Create trust! Please don’t break it! Without trust, the marriage has no foundation.
How do you sever trust?
When you consistently disappoint your partner with lies and deception, trust will crumble. When confidence in a marriage is lost, the end is imminent. You cannot do without trust! Build trust deliberately through honesty.
Do everything you can to maintain trust by being truthful to a fault. Let your spouse r finance be able to line up your words with your actions! Be completely honest.
A trust may be re-established once it has been destroyed, but it takes time and perseverance.
Signs of a Dying Relationship or Marriage
2. When the couple disregards God
There is really little you can accomplish without God.
God is the one who builds homes. God is the architect of marriage.
It is a waste of time to strive to construct without God.
Psa 127:1 (KJV) Except the LORD build the house, they labour in vain that build it: except the LORD keep the city, the watchman waketh but in vain.
As a form of retaliation, some couples engage in adulterous acts. It is only a matter of time before the impending crash becomes apparent.
Iniquity is always a destructive path. Don’t toe that path!
Sin’s wages are death, thus when sin enters a marriage system, it dies by default.
I pray your marriage does not end in divorce!
I prophesy over your marriage and household, and I pray that God will protect you in Jesus’ name!
Hello and good morning! I’ll pick up where I left off yesterday.
We started with some prayer topics that every couple should pray, and we looked at two of them yesterday. We continue from there.
3. Remove selfishness from my heart.
This is another prayer that every couple and singles should say together. Selfishness simply implies failing to consider your spouse/fiancee. In what ways may couples be self-centered? Let me name a few.
Gal 5:17 For there is a root of sinful self-interest in us that is at odds with a free spirit, just as the free spirit is incompatible with SELFISHNESS. These two ways of life are antithetical, so that you cannot live at times one way and at times another way according to how you feel on any given day.
No More Selfishness Towards My Lover
a. Communication selfishness
You enjoy talking to the whole world except your loved one. That is inappropriate!.
You simply forget to converse with your spouse! You have no recollection of it. It’s understandable if you don’t talk to or call others very often. But don’t you think something is amiss when you virtually live on Whats App or Messenger, chatting up the entire world except your spouse or loved one?
You absolutely must change your approach! Allow your spouse to be your biggest fan! The most important conversations on your phone should be with your spouse, not with an old acquaintance or family member.
Pastor, we see every day! It makes no difference. Protect your marriage by doing whatever you can. You cannot truly say you tried unless you have given it your all and made some mindset modifications.
The same way for singles in courtship. Decide to ignore the whole world rather than your lover.
No More Selfishness Towards My Lover
b. Shopping selfishness
Do you go shopping and just buy your things, fully forgetting about your spouse? That’s not quite fair!
Even if the shopping is for you, make sure you grab something for your spouse. This is how you keep the flames alive.
Dear husbands, don’t buy all the electronics unless you also buy some lady stuff. Dear lady, don’t get all the powders and make-up kits unless you also buy some guy items! Be prudent.
Pray that God should remove selfishness from your heart in every way!
Prayers have tremendous power. God answers requests. My mother told me when I was about 10 years old that I would be a pastor. I didn’t agree with her. I stated that I aspired to be a businessman. She stated that she will pray, and we shall see!
When I was sixteen, she went home to live with the Lord. When I was nineteen, Jesus appeared to me in a night vision, and I was immediately called to ministry.
God heard her requests!
I will not claim that God answered all of my prayer points, but God did respond to my prayers most of the time.
I prayed for folks over the phone and online for fruit of the womb, jobs, marital breakthroughs, liberation from sexual perversion, bodily healing, and many other things, and God answered by fire!
God responds to requests. Do not give up on your partner, marriage, or house, and do not stop praying!
Pray, and then pray some more! Never stop praying in the Spirit. God will astound you.
Here are five prayer points you should use on occasion.
Dear Couple, Never Stop Praying
1. Lord, reveal to me what I don’t know that I think I know.
The majority of marriage problems are caused by ignorance. There are a lot of things we don’t know that we think we do.
There may be no development as long as you remain stubborn, without adjusting, and without being open to the possibility that you are incorrect. Nobody knows everything, not even me.
I might have written a devotional a day for a while, then two each day for a while. Every day, I am reminded that I still don’t know a lot of things. I continue to learn, read, and am open to revelations from God’s Spirit. I am not a marital specialist. I am merely a vessel in the hands of God.
Jer 33:3 (KJV) Call unto me, and I will answer thee, and shew thee great and mighty things, which thou knowest not.
Your marriage will improve if you start learning things you didn’t know before and decide not to stick to what you used to know.
Dear Couple, Never Stop Praying
2. Lord, shield me from the enemy’s flaming darts.
The Bible speaks about the burning darts that the enemy throws at us. But have you ever needed to summon someone to remove darts from your back or neck?
No!
So, where have those darts gone?
Those darts are the devil’s thoughts and suggestions. They are mental assaults.
The Amplified Bible refers to them as missiles!
The modern English version refers to them as flaming arrows!
Be cautious, husband and wife, when unpleasant thoughts enter your minds!
I believe this is why the scriptures says:
Eph 6:16 (KJV) Above all, taking the shield of faith, wherewith ye shall be able to quench all the fiery darts of the wicked.
Rick Renner explained that
“The words “fiery darts” are from the Greek word belos. It referred to an arrow with its tip wrapped with fabric soaked in flammable fluids so it would burn with hot and angry flames. The famous Greek writer Thycidides used this Greek word belos to depict specially-made, long, slender arrows that outwardly looked harmless; however, the hollow interior of the arrow was filled with flammable fluids that, upon impact, exploded into a raging fire. This last arrow is most likely the picture that Paul had in his mind when he wrote about the “…fiery darts of the wicked.”
He continued:
“Often when the devil strikes, his attack looks inconsequential at first, like harmless little arrows that can do little damage. But when those arrows strike into the heart or emotions, they often explode and set human passions aflame, causing a minor issue to develop into a fierce, flaming situation. The damage done in such a moment is very serious — and all of it could have been avoided if the shield of faith had been held high and regularly doused in the water of the Word!”
In collusion, soak yourself in the word, it will render the arrows and missiles useless.
