How To Deal With One-Sided Love. When love is one-sided, it can be difficult and painful for the person who is not reciprocating the feelings. It’s important to remember that love is not something that can be forced or controlled. Here are a few things that can be done when love is one-sided:
1. Accept the situation As singles in a dating situation or courtship, It’s important to accept the reality of the situation, that the feelings are not mutual, and move on. There is no point beating a dead body, once the love is not mutual and you have to pursue, run after, give your eyeballs, and yet you won’t get love, just move on! Don’t even think if you give sex, anything will change. You simply end up giving your body for nothing while also getting into disfavour with God because we all know, right, that premarital sex is not what God advocates!
For those who are married, accepting the situation simply means you start digging in to know why it is so and what you can do to correct the marital anomaly! You want to be in a marriage with the one you love and who loves you!
How To Deal With One-Sided Love
2. Reflect on yourself Take the time to reflect on what you may have done differently and how you can improve yourself in future relationships. What caused it? What could be responsible? Why am I unlovable or why can’t I love properly?
3. Practice loving yourself first! Nobody will love you if you don’t love yourself! For singles, take care of yourself emotionally, mentally, and physically in order to heal and move on if you need to. It is important you love yourself! Embrace your imperfections and learn to love yourself for who you are, rather than constantly striving for perfection in the flesh. Stay away from sin and trust the Holy Spirit to give you the grace to get better by the day in that relationship or marriage!
4. Talk to someone Talking to a trusted Pastor or a therapist can be helpful in processing your feelings and getting a different perspective.
Jas 5:16 (MSG) Make this your common practice: Confess your sins to each other and pray for each other so that you can live together whole and healed. The prayer of a person living right with God is something powerful to be reckoned with.
How To Deal With One-Sided Love
5. Be honest with the person If you are the one unable to love the other person, decide to tell the person how you feel, be honest but also be prepared for the possibility that they may not feel the same way. Rather than stay in the relationship and struggle through with the possibility of continued struggling even after the wedding, it is better to open up and move on!
If you are married, you are not opening so that you can leave, because you are already married. You are opening up so that you can both get help. If you think your partner will not be able to handle it, then seek help first all by yourself once you see the issue is from your end! It is important to confront the issue!
These five ways about How To Deal With One-Sided Love are by no means exhaustive, but will guide you in taking the right steps!
The Lonely Side Of Love: One-Sided Relationships. George is head over heels for Sally! However, Sally is indifferent to the whole romantic saga. George tried all the love gymnastics but Sally is unmoved.
On the other hand, it is Mrs. Johnson that really loves her husband. All her love expressions were never reciprocated.
One-sided love can be painful in any relationship or marriage!
Can Love Be One-Sided?
Yes, love can be one-sided. This means one person in a relationship can have stronger love for the other person than the other person feels for them. This can lead to imbalances and difficulties in the relationship, and may eventually cause the relationship to end if the imbalance is not addressed.
The Lonely Side Of Love: One-Sided Relationships
Let’s Rephrase. Should Love be one-sided?
No, love should not be one-sided!
Love should ideally be mutual, in which both persons in the relationship or marriage feel the same level of love and affection for each other.
Son 2:16 (KJV) My beloved is mine, and I am his: he feedeth among the lilies.
Son 7:10 (KJV) I am my beloved’s, and his desire is toward me.
One-sided love can lead to feelings of rejection and hurt for the person who is not reciprocating the same level of love. It is essential for both parties to communicate their feelings and work towards creating a balance of love and affection in the relationship.
The Lonely Side Of Love: One-Sided Relationships
What are the causes of one-sided love?
1. Unrequited feelings One person has feelings for the other, but those feelings are not reciprocated.
2. Incompatible goals or values One person wants a deeper commitment than the other person is willing to provide.
3. Trauma or past experiences One person has unresolved emotional baggage from past relationships that affect their ability to fully open up to another person. Also, personality traits or past experiences may make someone more susceptible to being in a one-sided relationship
4. Lack of communication or effort One person puts in more effort or expresses their feelings more clearly than the other, leading to an imbalance in the relationship.
5. A lack of emotional reciprocation A person may lack the capacity to respond emotionally to love for various actors.
6. A lack of physical attraction Lack of physical attraction will certainly manifest itself in the inability to reciprocate love appropriately! Nobody has any business marrying someone he is not attracted to in the first place!
7. Low self-esteem Low self-esteem can make a person pursue a relationship where they are only giving and not receiving any love back.
8. Fear of being alone This can contribute to someone choosing to stay in a one-sided relationship.
What do you do if you find yourself in a one-sided relationship or marriage? Tomorrow, I will continue from here and let us in on what can be done to solve the issues of one-sided love.
Lover Boy of the Bible: Physical Attraction. This book is written by one of the greatest lover boys of the Bible! Here are ten lessons from the Song of Solomon on dating, marriage, and sex.
Lover Boy of the Bible: Physical Attraction
Son 1:5 (MSG) I am weathered but still elegant, oh, dear sisters in Jerusalem, Weather-darkened like Kedar desert tents, time-softened like Solomon’s Temple hangings.
Lover Boy of the Bible: Physical Attraction
I have told singles over and over again! Make sure you marry someone you are attracted to! After the wedding, you are not going to become blind, you will see other people you will still like, so it’s important that you really “like” and “love” the person you are going to live with for the rest of your life! That way, there will be fewer distractions!
You don’t want to see someone’s face early in the morning and scream “the blood of Jesus,” rather you want to look at that delectable face and “sing in tongues” and thank God for the day you met them!
Now, get this straight, nobody is ugly! Beauty is in the beholder’s eyes, and we all have “funny” things we are looking for in a man or woman!
There is that special someone somewhere who will love you passionately as you are! Don’t let the devil “body shame” you or “soul-shame” you!
You are handsome as you are and you are beautiful as you are!
Heb 10:5 (KJV) Wherefore when he cometh into the world, he saith, Sacrifice and offering thou wouldest not, but a body hast thou prepared me:
God gave you your body. Love yourself or else, nobody has any business loving you!
Lover Boy of the Bible: Physical Attraction
For married couples, you have to keep working at looking great for your spouse! Pay attention to what they want and don’t take them for granted!
Particularly, men are moved by sight, so you don’t want to dress carelessly all the time at home!
Dress deliberately to tantalize him when you are alone in the house! Get lingerie and bum shorts that will fire up his blood! Don’t be wearing Jeans and sweaters up and down the house! For what? Lol…
As a matter of fact, it’s okay to walk around with nothing on you when you are both alone. Discover yourselves and be intoxicated with each other! Ha Pastor, where are all these in the scriptures? I will show you and I will close there and continue tomorrow.
Pro 5:18-19 (GW) Let your own fountain be blessed, and enjoy the girl you married when you were young, [19] a loving doe and a graceful deer. Always let her breasts satisfy you. Always be intoxicated with her love.
Wow! Be intoxicated with the love of your spouse! Selah!
Baggage Claim: Unpacking Your Past Issues. Hey! Have you claimed your baggage yet? Hm, you can’t really disown it, you rather unpack it! Doesn’t matter what kind of embarrassing and funny items are in your bag! What matters is to unpack them so that you will not frustrate the one you profess to love!
A woman’s baggage is different from that of a man, however, both have their baggages!
It’s important for couples to be aware of these potential “baggages” and to be willing to address them in a constructive and healthy way. This may include seeking therapy or counseling, learning effective communication and problem-solving skills, and developing healthy coping mechanisms.
By working through these issues, couples can build a stronger foundation for their relationship, and create a deeper sense of trust, intimacy, and connection in their marriage.
Baggage Claim: Unpacking Your Past Issues
A few Types of “baggages” that couples can bring into their marriage include:
1. Past relationship baggage
If a partner has had a past relationship that ended badly, it can be difficult for them to fully open up and trust again. They may be unconsciously bringing in old hurt, anger, or resentment from their past relationship and then the present lover or spouse suffers unnecessarily.
Baggage Claim: Unpacking Your Past Issues
2. Family dynamics
The way a person was raised, their family background, and the dynamics within their family can all have an impact on how they relate to others, including their partner.
For example, someone who grew up in a home where there were a lot of conflicts may have a harder time with communication and problem-solving in their marriage. To unlock this baggage, one might need to improve listening skills, express thoughts and feelings clearly and directly, practice empathy, practice active listening, seek couples therapy
Baggage Claim: Unpacking Your Past Issues
3. Personal traumas
Trauma, whether it be physical, emotional, or sexual abuse, can have a lasting impact on a person’s mental and emotional well-being. It can affect the way they relate to others and can make it harder for them to trust, feel safe, and connect with their partner.
To unpack this, one might need to seek individual therapy, practice self-care and self-awareness, open communication and honesty with a partner, and work through unresolved issues.
If this baggage is not unpacked, the marriage might experience difficulty in forming connections, difficulty in trust, and difficulty in sexual intimacy.
Are you beginning to see why you need to enter the bag? We have a paid course on unpacking your baggage and getting healed. Reach me via WhatsApp if you need to take the course and it would be set up for you.
Isa 43:18-19 (MSG) [18] “Forget about what’s happened; don’t keep going over old history. [19] Be alert, be present. I’m about to do something brand-new. It’s bursting out! Don’t you see it? There it is! I’m making a road through the desert, rivers in the badlands.
There are many other baggages, but I will stop here this morning!
Tonight will be explosive in our weekly meetings on WhatsApp!
Uncovering the Secrets of the Ultimate Husbands. Who is that ultimate husband? Who is that single man who will be a great husband? How can you even know a man that will be a good husband? Discover the timeless wisdom of three biblical figures who set the bar high when it comes to being a devoted and loving husband. From Boaz’s generosity, and Joseph’s faithfulness, to David’s repentance, these men have valuable lessons to teach us about what it truly means to be a great husband in today’s world.
In this devotional, we will look closely at three men who are considered great husbands. We will explore what made these men good husbands and how their examples can be applied to our lives.
Uncovering Secrets of the Ultimate Husband: Boaz
He is a wealthy landowner in the book of Ruth. He is known for his kindness and generosity towards Ruth, a widowed relative of his, and he ultimately marries her and becomes the father of her son, Obed.
Learn From Boaz:
1. He shows kindness and generosity towards Ruth. Be a kind husband.
2. He is fair and just, as seen in his dealings with his workers. Be an upright husband.
3. He is loyal to his family and kin, as seen in his willingness to marry Ruth. Be a loyal husband.
4. Don’t be overly focused on wealth and material possessions at the expense of your partner.
5. Don’t take advantage of your fiancee or wife.
6. Don’t see your partner as a means to an end
Uncovering Secrets of the Ultimate Husband: Joseph
Joseph is known for his work as a carpenter. Joseph is known for his faithfulness to Mary, his wife, even when she was pregnant with Jesus and he was falsely accused of infidelity. He accepted and cared for his wife, even though her pregnancy would cause him many troubles, and he trusted God’s plan for his life.
Learn From Joseph:
1. He is faithful to his wife Mary. Be faithful.
2. He accepts and cares for his wife and child. Be caring.
3. He trusts God’s plan for his life and tries to do the right thing, as seen in his decision to divorce Mary quietly, rather than make a public scandal. Be a lovely husband.
4. Don’t be quick to jump to conclusions or accuse your wife of wrongdoing.
5. Don’t be unfaithful to your wife
Uncovering Secrets of the Ultimate Husband: David
David is best known for his role as the king of Israel. He is known for his deep love for his wife Bathsheba, despite his infidelity and the complications it caused. He repented of his sins and sought forgiveness, and God forgave him.
Learn From David:
1. He deeply loves his wife Bathsheba
2. He repents of his sins and seeks forgiveness, showing humility
3. Don’t be unfaithful to your wife. It can cause damage to your relationship.
4. Don’t try to hide your mistakes or sins. Be sincere.
5. Don’t let your power and position as head of the home go to your head.
In conclusion, the Bible presents many examples of men who were good husbands, and the examples of Boaz, Joseph, and David are just a few of them. Each of them had their own strengths and weaknesses, but they also shared some common traits that made them good husbands. They were kind and generous, faithful and loving, and they had a strong sense of loyalty and faith. Their examples can be seen as a model of how we should treat our partners and families, and how we can strive to be the best versions of ourselves. By learning from these men and by following Jesus’ example, we can be better husbands!
