These Four Things Will Bring Regret. Regret is one of the sad things that can happen to anyone. It is a terrible feeling that leaves one feeling guilty, depressed, and sometimes despondent. It is a feeling of, ‘If I had known it will turn out this way, I would not have done it’. It is a feeling of wishing things never turned out the way they are. A feeling of wishing one can turn back the hands of time.
A feeling of hopelessness. What makes regret bad is that with all these feelings, really you cannot change what has happened. It is like crying over spilled milk. My prayer to a lady out there this morning experiencing great regret is that God will turn things around for your good. He will show you great mercy and bring a testimony out of the trial. Most of the time, the things that will later cause sorrow or regret don’t look like it and that’s what makes it painful.
You never thought in your wildest imagination he can jilt you, you never thought after promising you heaven and earth he could sleep with you, abandon you for another lady and accuse you. The list could be endless. But for every blow of the devil, God has more than enough grace and mercy to heal. However, I believe prevention is better than cure and God will have us move into maturity while we know what to do and what will bring regret later and avoid doing them. Particularly ladies, they get to bare the brunt and feel the heat of hurt most of the time, May God help us in Jesus.
These Four Things Will Bring Regret 1. Becoming emotionally attached to someone who is not ready to marry you
Emotional attachment is a dangerous place to be because at that time you are not ready to reason nor willing to hear advice, direction, or instructions even from God. When emotions are involved, it’s like going on a sloppy, slippery road, descent is easiest and becomes unavoidable. Don’t be quick to get your emotions involved, do your findings first, pray, and ask questions. Be slow to get emotional. Don’t give your emotions the lead or the driver’s seat in your relationship, it will lead to an accident.
On the other hand for the married, emotional attachment is necessary, as it also reflects the one flesh principle in marriage. This emotional attachment with your spouse helps you to relate on a deeply emotional level and that connectedness helps your marriage and even your prayer life. Anything that will threaten that connection should not be allowed.
I will stop here this morning and conclude tomorrow with “These Four Things Will Bring Regret”
CONFESSION The Lord is my strength today in all I do
PRAYER Lord, give me the wisdom to avoid regrets in Jesus’ name
THOUGHT Wilt thou not revive us again: that thy people may rejoice in thee? Shew us thy mercy, O Lord, and grant us thy salvation (Psalms 85:6-7 KJV)
ACTION Decide to live above regrets and focus on the future
Overcoming Rejection After Breakfast Is Served. Sally was head over heels in love with George. Everything was looking great with all the butterflies flapping their wings. It was not for long however, George served Sally breakfast! Sally was heartbroken. What would she do?
All of the time, I tell people like Sally, it is not time to cry, it is time to move on. You cry when there is a loss of a loved one. That is understandable. But when somebody decides to leave you and move on, yes, you can cry a little, but you need to shake yourself into reality and understand that rejection is not always a disappointment, rejection can actually be a direction from God!
Love is two-way, it is mutual. But when one party decides he or she is no longer in love, don’t break your neck over that!
As a child of God, if you pray a lot, and you serve God with the integrity of heart, and then you fall in love with a guy who is deceiving you and who will eventually harm you one way or the other in the future, what do you think would happen?
God Himself would orchestrate a breakup because He doesn’t want any evil to befall you.
It is a reality that as humans, one can fall in love with a person that will eventually hurt you. Sometimes, you even know and you can see the signs. You can see the uncontrollable anger. You can see the unrepentant heart. You can see a penchant desire for pre-marital sex without any sense of guilt. You can even see that he or she is cheating on you, and yet you still hold on, believing that you will change him.
If you are a child of God and God loves you which I know He does, that kind of relationship will break up. You see, there are some relationships that break up and the next thing you should do is thanksgiving!
What do you do in Overcoming Rejection After Breakfast Is Served? You should just go ahead and thank God for saving your life! There are some strange ladies out there you get involved with and after a breakup, you thank your God, not getting into some pity party! You see, you thought you love him or her? Not really? It is because you have been embroiled with sex. You have tasted the stew before it was ready and now your tongue is burnt. When you get involved with sex before the wedding, confusion enters the soul.
Why is that? Because the injunctions of God have been violated.
When there is confusion in the soul, your mind becomes unclear. You continue to love the wrong person. You cannot disconnect from the one that hurt you from time to time. A soul tie has been established and illegal soulical bonding has been effected.
He or she decides to move on but you are wrecked emotionally. Months after, you couldn’t pick up your life. What do you do in such instances?
You run to God. The scripture says in Psalm 23, He restroreth my soul…
When you go to Him, He will heal the hurt, pacify the wounds, and touch you where no hands can reach. He will put the nuts to the bolts, and then you can see clearly, and then you wonder why you were loving a lair, a user, a manipulator, and a cheat in the first place.
So, you let go of such abusive relationships. If the wrong person doesn’t go, the right will not show up.
But why would he or she just leave me like that? Am I worthless? No, you are too much for him or her. Your destiny weighs more, and only the right one can handle your glorious destiny!
Every Abedne-go will eventually go! Let them go. For those who are married, there can also be rejection from your spouse. That is not the time to shut down as if you are a PC.
That is not the time to recoil into your shell like a snail. That is not the time to run into a cave. It is time to communicate with your God and with him or her to know the source of the rejection. Never assume, for assumption is the lowest form of knowledge. Never allow rejection to degenerate into strife. I see a glorious future ahead of you. I see God coming into your situation and bringing help your way and that will be your portion in Jesus’ name! This is what you do in Overcoming Rejection After Breakfast Is Served
CONFESSION I am not rejected, because God has not rejected me
PRAYER Pray that God strengthens you to make the right decisions
THOUGHT Hosea 14:4 I will heal their backsliding, I will love them freely: for mine anger is turned away from him.
O Lord, Where Is My Spouse? From counseling experiences, I know some of us have done all we know to do and yet it doesn’t look like anything is happening. When you find yourself at this point, what do you do? What else is there to do?
I want to write to both singles and married this morning. For singles, It can really be frustrating when it looks like nearly all your friends are married except you. It is even more frustrating to know that some of those who are already married are not as beautiful as you and they are not as spiritual as you!
“If anybody should be married by now, it ought not to be Sister Sube who got born again last year! I have been serving God consistently for five years! What is happening here?“
O Lord, Where Is My Spouse? Here are a few things to know that will help you.
The Covenant
The first thing that you need to know that will help you in this situation where you might be experiencing a seeming delay is that you are a child of Covenant. This knowledge is the foundation of the entirety of your Christian life. It is on this spiritual truth that every other blessing springs. You must have a consciousness of that Covenant.
Listen to me, you are not just here floating to nowhere, you are in a covenant! A covenant is like an agreement that cannot be broken. You are in a certain agreement with God concerning your life, marriage, and destiny! This covenant stipulates that you can never be abandoned by God!
It is not just possible. Its possibility does not exist, that God will abandon you! How do I know? God swore by Himself and put His throne on the line, that all He has promised you, He will bring to pass and that He is committed until it is completed.
Take a look at it:
Hebrews 16 – 19 For men verily swear by the greater: and an oath for confirmation is to them an end of all strife. Wherein God, willing more abundantly to shew unto the heirs of promise the immutability of his counsel, confirmed it by an oath: That by two immutable things, in which it was impossible for God to lie, we might have a strong consolation, who have fled for refuge to lay hold upon the hope set before us: Which hope we have as an anchor of the soul, both sure and stedfast, and which entereth into that within the veil;
This is the anchor of your soul. When doubts come, when tests and trials come, when your faith is shaky, when your feet seems imbalanced, when your heart begins to vacillate, what will keep you strong and unshakable is nothing other than the covenant.
If you are a child of the covenant, you are too covered, too blessed, too favoured. This covenant sense and perspective must be there in your life. It is on this covenant that you stand.
How can this covenant be rooted in your heart? You have to understand the terms of the covenant first. The terms can only be found in the covenant document and that is God’s word. Get familiar with it. Get to know and study what rights you have in God.
When you are oblivious to this covenant and the covenant rights, you will be easily depressed and discouraged from time to time.
When you get to know this covenant, it will give birth to something powerful. It will give birth to Assurance!
O Lord, Where Is My Spouse?
For married couples, the covenant consciousness will ensure an infidelity-free marriage. Once the couple recognizes that they are in covenant with each other and the covenant witness is God Himself, it will engender a distaste for sin. Who really wants to offend God in that sense?
The covenant awareness will keep both of you sane. This is why you should strive as couples to be covenant minded in your marriage.
Covenant violation does not come with nice consequences.
Dan 11:32 (AMPC) And such as violate the covenant he shall pervert and seduce with flatteries, but the people who know their God shall prove themselves strong and shall stand firm and do exploits [for God]. Good morning.
CONFESSION I am a child of the Covenant PRAYER Lord, open my eyes to see all that belong to me in the covenant
THOUGHT That by two immutable things, in which it was impossible for God to lie, we might have a strong consolation…
Attraction In Relationships And Marriage. As a single, you don’t want to spiritualize everything and say attraction doesn’t matter! It matters a lot!
Marry somebody you like and you love, a friend you can play with and laugh with. That is why the scripture says, “…rejoice with the wife of thy youth.“
You also need to know that God will not force anybody on you. This idea that you are marrying somebody not because you love the person but because God said so is defective.
As a lady, when a guy walks up to you and tells you that God has spoken to Him, you also need to hear God as well.
The other day, a guy who is the president of his fellowship proposed to a lady within the fellowship this way:
“Young lady, God has spoken to me. Thus saith the Spirit of God, you are my wife. I will like you to cooperate with God’s voice. You don’t need to pray again because God has spoken to me. It is wise to listen to God lest one is faced with His wrath.”
That is nothing more than intimidation, manipulation, and witchcraft!
The scripture clearly identifies the importance of physical attraction when it comes to marriage. God in His wisdom knows that if a man does not derive satisfaction from his wife, he would seek it elsewhere, which of course will not only be detrimental to him but to his whole family.
Have you noticed that when a man commits adultery, the whole family suffers the consequences?
So, God advises man:
Let thy fountain be blessed: and rejoice with the wife of thy youth. Let her be as the loving hind and pleasant roe; let her breasts satisfy thee at all times; and be thou ravished always with her love. And why wilt thou, my son, be ravished with a strange woman, and embrace the bosom of a stranger? For the ways of man are before the eyes of the Lord, and he pondereth all his goings (Proverbs 5:18-21 KJV)
In other words, what God wants is that you focus on your wife and not somebody out there. He said all your ways are before Him and He will inquire about everything you do. More or less, the affair that you think is secret is actually open to God.
Now, we have established that physical attraction is very important! But there is a balance! Physical attraction alone is not the only thing that determines your choice! See the scripture:
Favour is deceitful, and beauty is vain: but a woman that feareth the Lord, she shall be praised. (Proverbs 31:30 KJV)
Message Translation says: Charm can mislead and beauty soon fades. The woman to be admired and praised is the woman who lives in the Fear–of– God. (Proverbs 31:30 Message)
So we see here, the only thing shouldn’t be outward beauty, but also inner beauty. It is okay if she has hot legs, but her heart must also be hot for God! A hot leg without a hot heart will get your hands burnt at the end.
So in a man or in a woman, I should have an attraction for him or her, while he or she must have an attraction for God.
Attraction In Relationships And Marriage is very important!
Be patient and wait for the salvation of God in your marriage. If you are already married, stay focused on your spouse!
May God help us all.
CONFESSION I am a child of God. I am beautiful
PRAYER Pray that God will be your wisdom and strength
THOUGHT A good woman is hard to find, and worth far more than diamonds. Her husband trusts her without reserve, and never has reason to regret it (Proverbs 31:10-11 Message)
Two Things You Shouldn’t Ask A Lady Firstly, do not ask her to stay over before the wedding. Secondly, do not ask her for money repeatedly. In every kingdom, there are lifestyles and there are ethics that go with them When you adhere to these ethics, you don’t get into trouble. When you flout them, there will be consequences. It is the same way in the scriptures.
Here are Two Things You Shouldn’t Ask A Lady
1. Do not ask her to stay over before the wedding
When you have a relationship with a lady, either dating or in courtship, you should not put pressure on her to come and pass the night in your place. You are meant to “leave” before you “cleave, ” but when you invite her over, you are trying to “cleave” without “leaving.” That is the wrong order. Destinies will be clipped when you cleave before you leave.
Therefore shall a man leave his father and his mother, and shall cleave unto his wife: and they shall be one flesh. (Genesis 2:24 KJV)
When you go over to pass the night in his place, it is like trapping yourself. You are on his territory and anything can happen. Amnon couldn’t carry out his lustful thoughts on Tamar, but the moment she was in his room, the equation changed. He bolted the door and raped her!
When you are in a guy’s house you are not married to, the stage is set for compromise and because of the way a man’s body is wired, something will usually happen.
What if nothing happens? Are the angels clapping for you? I doubt! You have misrepresented Christ in a way, and you are passing the wrong message across. Your life is meant to be an example. Your lifestyle is meant to be a living gospel, so you need to be careful of how you behave.
On the other hand in marriage and for couples. do not stay outside your matrimonial home because of some quarrels. Do not ask your wife to leave the house because of some little provocation.
“I will send you back to your father’s house!”
That is a statement or thought you should not dance with under any circumstance!
Taking it further, do not leave your bedroom and go spend the night elsewhere. Stay in your bedroom regardless of what is happening. Resolve it rather than prolonging it.
Two Things You Shouldn’t Ask A Lady 2. Do not ask her for money repeatedly
There is nothing wrong in giving your fiance money if he is not financially disposed like you and you are in a position to help, but it is quite wrong to ask for money from her every other opportunity.
In fact, you may be seen as a leech at the end of the day who is only trying to manipulate the emotions of ladies to get what you want. This even becomes more intense when the relationship doesn’t end in a marriage. The lady will feel used and will end up hurt.
It is also not good for a man to keep borrowing money he has no intention of returning. That bothers on integrity and insincerity. It doesn’t matter if you are born again. There is nothing like holy fraud. Fraud is fraud!
It is also very wrong to keep collecting money from someone you intend to dump later. Life is about seed, time, and harvest and you don’t want to be sowing that kind of seed into your future.
It is the height of irresponsibility, for a man to ask all the time without reciprocating. If she gives you out of love, it is okay, if you ask her once out of a blue moon to sort something urgently, it is okay, but when you ask every other time and come up with one story or the other, it is not healthy for both of you!
On the other hand, in marriage, do not allow your wife to ask for money all the time before you make it available. There is nothing like “my money” again in marriage. The money belongs to both of you and it should be seen that way, irrespective of who is making it or making the most.
Never use money to control each other in your marriage. Do not give access to mammon spirit in your home. If you try to control her with money, she may end up trying to make “her own money” in desperate ways, which of course might be counterproductive to the marriage and the home. These are the Two Things You Shouldn’t Ask A Lady.
CONFESSION I have God’s wisdom in my relationship/marriage
PRAYER Lord, grant me more wisdom and grace in my relationship/marriage
THOUGHT Let no man despise thy youth; but be thou an example of the believers, in word, in conversation, in charity, in spirit, in faith, in purity. (1 Timothy 4:12 KJV)
ACTION PLAN Have a discussion with your loved one if there is need to make amends.
