“When did I see You, Jesus Christ and gave you food?”
“When you gave that hungry boy in your class food to eat at school.”
“When did I give you my clothes to wear?”
“When you gave that girl on your street your old clothes.”
The sentences above are scripted from Matthew 25:34-36.
“then the king will say to the good people on his right, ‘come. My Father has given you his blessing. Come and receive the kingdom God has prepared for you since the world was made. I was hungry, and you gave me food. I was thirsty, and you gave me something to drink. I was alone and away from home, and you invited me into your house. I was without clothes, and you gave me something to wear. I was sick, and you cared for me. I was in prison, and you visited me.’” Matt. 25: 34-36 ICB
If you read further down this chapter you will see what the people asked him and his response to them.
Jesus Christ has called you to be help for others. Give to people and not grudgingly. Give with joy because that is the best way to give.
Imagine Jesus Christ telling you this when you finally meet him? How wonderful does it sound? It sounds great to me!
Don’t look down on the poor and needy. Instead, be a help to them. Share with others who don’t have as much as you do. Give your time and effort towards helping a classmate understand a lesson at school. Comfort a friend who has lost a loved one. Follow a friend to visit a sick family member in the hospital. Pray for a friend whose family is going through a hard financial period. Ask your parents if you can take foodstuff to them.
What you can do for the poor and needy is plenty. Ask the Lord for how to help them.
May the Lord make you a helper to the poor and needy. Amen.
Prayer: My Lord, Jesus Christ, teach me to give to others. Show me ways I can be of help to the poor and needy. In Jesus’ name I pray, amen.
Action point: Is there a friend or neighbor who you think will need some of the clothes you don’t wear anymore? Ask your parents for approval first.
In today’s devotional we will be looking at how to make your spouse love you forever.
31 For this cause shall a man leave his father and mother, and shall be joined unto his wife, and they two shall be one flesh. 32 This is a great mystery: but I speak concerning Christ and the church. 33 Nevertheless let every one of you in particular so love his wife even as himself; and the wife see that she reverence her husband (Ephesians 5:22-33 KJV)
In marriage, there is a joining of the man unto the wife, not just physically, but spiritually as well. But here, we see that the physical is even more emphasized. They two shall become ONE FLESH! Isn’t that interesting?
We can now understand the confusion and disorder that comes into play when two people who are not yet married are trying to become one flesh! That is clearly not God’s order! Jeru trip is for married people! Period!
How can two people become one flesh for God’s sake? That sounds so impossible! What is the full implication of that?
Well, in the next verse, Apostle Paul simply admitted that this is a great mystery that he himself does not understand fully. But there is one thing he said he knows, and that is the fact that the way Christ treats the church is the way husbands should treat their wives.
How did Christ love the church? Christ loves the church even as himself. That is why he now said in verse 33:
Nevertheless let every one of you in particular so love his wife even as himself; and the wife see that she reverence her husband.
In order words, marriage is a mystery, I don’t fully understand it, it is kind of complex, NEVERTHELESS… Husbands, love your wife, wives, reverence your husband!
Take a look at verse 31 – 33 in Message translation:
31 And this is why a man leaves father and mother and cherishes his wife. No longer two, they become “one flesh.” 32 This is a huge mystery, and I don’t pretend to understand it all. What is clearest to me is the way Christ treats the church. 33 And this provides a good picture of how each husband is to treat his wife, loving himself in loving her, and how each wife is to honor her husband.
I know it is a mystery. I know women are difficult to satisfy. I know men can be egotistical. I know both parties can be so selfish…I don’t really understand how two unlikely people are to come together in marriage, but one thing is clear, and that is all you need to know. I know the way Christ treats the church! This is how to treat your spouse
That demystifies it all. That unravels that which has been a puzzle! That brings the enigma out of the complexity! That changes the equation and solves it! If I can study God’s word as man or as a lady and follow the examples thereof, marriage is easy and enjoyable! If I can follow and do the same thing Christ does in treating the church and treat my wife likewise, Lobatan! (That’s all)
Why follow the example of Christ? See it right there in verse 33 MSG
And this provides a good picture of how each husband is to treat his wife, loving himself in loving her, and how each wife is to honor her husband.
Christ gives us a good picture of how a husband should treat his wife, and how each wife is to honour her husband.
Christ is patiently waiting for the church as the bridegroom. So treat your spouse by following Christ’s example, I know as a man, I am supposed to wait for my bride and not demand Jeru Trips before the wedding day!
Let’s break verse 33 down a little bit more because that is the way you are supposed to treat each other in a pragmatic way. Let’s take a look at the amplified version.
However, let each man of you [without exception] love his wife as [being in a sense] his very own self; and let the wife see that she respects and reverences her husband [that she notices him, regards him, honors him, prefers him, venerates, and esteems him; and that she defers to him, praises him, and loves and admires him exceedingly].
Okay we see it clearly now:
Husband’s responsibilities
1. Love your wife 2. Love your wife as you love yourself
Wife’s responsibilities
1. Respect your husband 2. Reverence your husband 3. Notice him 4. Regard him 5. Honour him 6. Prefer him 7. Venerate him 8. Esteem him 9. Defer to him 10. Praise him 11. Love him 12. Admire him exceedingly!
I don’t know how to satisfy my husband. I just don’t understand him. Seek to do all the above, you will be amazed. The scripture cannot be broken!
I don’t know what else to do to my wife. She is difficult to satisfy!
Love her as you love yourself! Not too much story! God knows the man doesn’t like too much story, so he gave you in one simple logical explanation; lest you say they are too many, simply love her as you love yourself. What you wouldn’t do to yourself, don’t do it to her! God knows the woman like stories, so He gave it to her using many words! Both parties know what to do. No more excuse!
May God grant more understanding!
CONFESSION FOR THE DAY Lord, I know how to treat my spouse or spouse-to-be
PRAYER FOR THE DAY Pray that God will open the eyes of your understanding the more to understand these mysteries.
THOUGHT FOR THE DAY So ought men to love their wives as their own bodies. He that loveth his wife loveth himself. (Ephesians 5:28 KJV)
ACTION PLAN FOR THE DAY Decide to follow Christ’s example
Ade grew up in a family where he was never loved. The only love he understood was the constant criticism he got from his mother who thought the only way to make a child responsible was to use very harsh words. His father left many scars on his body from the buckles of belts that lacerated his body on different occasions. He never knew what real love was.
Angie’s case was not different. It was not so much of physical beatings, but the emotional abuses were as intense as the physical abuse that she grew up with. She grew up in self-hate never accepting herself and always believing something was wrong with her. Even though she was a beautiful girl, she never believed that because her parents never appreciated her once.
The harsh words and negative language from her parents in her growing years were like seeds that grew up into gigantic oaks, reaching out with their branches and limiting her from making any meaningful progress in life.
Ade and Angie met later in life and got married. Both had dysfunctional backgrounds, they never loved themselves and so they could not love each other. The same use of harsh words that Angie so hated became her weapon against Ade. The same beatings that Ade endured and hated became his lifestyle as he physically abused Angie several times.
They were both at each other’s throats demanding from each other what they never experienced and what they could not offer. They found themselves doing exactly what they loathed. The abused had become the abusers! Eventually, their seven months old marriage ended in divorce.
They both think something was wrong with the other, and they were right!
One of the things you need to understand about life is the fact that you have to love yourself first.
You can never find true love when you don’t love yourself truly! Nobody has a business loving you without loving yourself first! Most of the time, we try to cover this self-hate with some activities like sports or some hobbies. But the issues remain deep down, waiting to surface at any provocation.
Ladies often cover it with nice clothes and make-up, and a very good mask, but all that never solves the deep-seated need to love yourself appropriately.
If you are already married, you need to ask yourself, do I love myself the way I should? If you don’t, you will keep having issues with your spouse! You will keep demanding from your spouse what he or she can never offer you.
Most times, it is only God and you that can offer you that which you are looking for in your spouse! So, stop putting unnecessary pressure on your spouse! The scenario becomes even more intense when the couple is both entangled in the mesh of self-hate!
What does the scriptures say?
That the communication of thy faith may become effectual by the acknowledging of every good thing which is in you in Christ Jesus. (Philemon 1:6 KJV)
You see, this is powerful! Your faith in God, the result you get in God as you relate with Him becomes effectual or productive when you acknowledge or accept every good thing that is in you!
You have to love yourself before your faith becomes effective. You have to stop all the self-hate and believe that God has a plan for you! You have to learn to stop thinking and dwelling on negative thoughts that pull you down and weigh you down. You have to fill your heart with God’s word instead, which promises you a glorious present and an incredibly blessed future!
You have to stop seeking love from guys as you offer your body for one after the other, as you can never find the answer you are desperately searching for that way! That answer is only in God! You can only find rest in God!
Come unto me, all ye that labour and are heavy laden, and I will give you rest. Take my yoke upon you, and learn of me; for I am meek and lowly in heart: and ye shall find rest unto your souls. For my yoke is easy, and my burden is light (Matthew 11:28-30 KJV)
I always love this in Message translation. It says
“Are you tired? Worn out? Burned out on religion? Come to me. Get away with me and you’ll recover your life. I’ll show you how to take a real rest. Walk with me and work with me – watch how I do it. Learn the unforced rhythms of grace. I won’t lay anything heavy or ill-fitting on you. Keep company with me and you’ll learn to live freely and lightly.”
Jesus says I will show you real rest. I will show you how to really love yourself and be loved. Learn the unforced rhythms of grace! You will discover that loving yourself can be so easy.
CONFESSION FOR THE DAY I have the love of God. I love myself.
PRAYER FOR THE DAY Pray for wisdom in the area of loving yourself.
THOUGHT FOR THE DAY The second is this: ‘You shall love your neighbor as yourself. ’ There is no other commandment greater than these.” (Mark 12:31 ESV)
ACTION PLAN FOR THE DAY Take an inventory of your life and see areas where you haven’t been loving yourself enough.
Christ has called you to be a light in a troubled and dark world.
“You are the light that gives light to the world. A city that is built on a hill cannot be hidden. And people don’t hide a light under a bowl. They put the light on a lampstand. Then the light shines for all the people in the house. In the same way, you should be light for other people. Live so that they will see the good things you do. Live so that they praise your Father in heaven.” Matt. 5:14-16 ICB.
The verses above vividly tell you one of the ways Christ has called us to be – be a light to the world. Just like it’s written in the passages above, why would anyone light a lamp and put it under their bed? Why would you not want to let others know about the wonderful love God has for everyone through Christ?
Light is supposed to make what is in the dark known to those in the dark. People who are yet to know Jesus are in the dark. They are lost, hopeless, and lonely. You are supposed to offer them hope and love through your light (telling them about Jesus).
Jesus has called you to be a light and not to hide your light. Put your light on a lampstand to shine to others so they may see and follow the way to Jesus.
Doing good is another way of showing your light to others. Your actions and words must show how good you are which is also a reflection of the Spirit of God in you. So, when you do good, you are saying to the world “I have God’s spirit in me.”
May the Lord help you today to make your light shine to the world. Amen.
Prayer: Jesus, I want my light to shine to the whole world. Show me practical ways I can do this. In Your mighty name, I pray, amen.
Action point: What light are you showing today? Good or bright light? Read John 1:4.
Seeing marriage as a covenant relationship and not as a contract relationship will help you love your wife with tender, loving care just as Christ loves the Church. The way Ephesians 5; 25-32 describes.
There is nothing wrong in loving your wife. There is nothing wrong in thinking about her. In fact, the scripture advises you do that.
Let thy fountain be blessed: and rejoice with the wife of thy youth. Let her be as the loving hind and pleasant roe; let her breasts satisfy thee at all times; and be thou ravished always with her love (Proverbs 5:18-19 KJV)
How do you love your wife appropriately?
It is when you see her with the eyes of Christ and deal with her as such in every area and aspect of your marriage.
1. For a woman, jeru trip does not start in the night with your wife. For a lady, it is an all-day affair right from when she wakes up, the way you greet her, the words you say to her, what you do for her while she is in the kitchen, the texts you send to her at work, the calls you give her, the chat you had with her, the chocolates you bought for her on your way home, the tender, loving care (TLC) you show her all day long and so on. This is what makes her totally give herself to you!
Try some of these and you will discover that your wife is not frigid like you thought, you will discover that she actually enjoys you in bed contrary to what you have always thought.
As married couples, you protect your body by learning to be patient with her. It takes a man to be ready in less than twenty seconds, but it takes a woman, an average of twenty minutes! It is an archaic husband that gets into the bedroom and rushes his wife:
“Mama Zerubabel, Come here! Lie down!” No!!!
2. Never lift your hands against her Don’t let quarrels degenerate to physical abuse. There will be quarrels, mostly because of different opinions, outlooks, temperaments, and beliefs, but in all of that, you must realize that you are one! Don’t attack each other. Guys, be patient. She will not be exactly like you.
Your duplicate is not needed. What is needed is a helper. You may seem more logical, but you are not as intuitive. You may be able to seal a business deal, but you may not be able to sense a wrong business partner as she will. You see, the devil wants you to fight all the time. That way, he knows your prayers will not be answered. Don’t cooperate with him. Love each other always. And let God bless you!
A marriage that God delights in is always a blessing.
May God bless our marriage.
CONFESSION FOR THE DAY Lord, teach me to love my wife
PRAYER FOR THE DAY Pray that God will teach you the skills needed in loving your wife
THOUGHT FOR THE DAY For the ways of man are before the eyes of the Lord, and he pondereth all his goings. (Proverbs 5:21 KJV)
