Women get easily hurt. And the husbands may not even be aware that they are hurt because their needs are miles apart.
Those are the times a husband asks his wife, “what is wrong?” She simply answers “Nothing!”
She says nothing because she doesn’t feel good explaining that something so little gets her upset.
Or she knows if she tries to explain, the husband might end up making her look like an idiot. So she keeps quiet.
What are examples of those little things that could upset your wife?
1. Don’t do things that make her uncomfortable sexually. Don’t embarrass her and don’t compare her with some past escapades.
2. Don’t ignore her when it comes to making important of financial decisions. Don’t leave her in the dark, keeping her guessing all the time.
3. Don’t compare her with others especially when it has to do with her appearance, weight or hairdo. Don’t go out of your way to appreciate and dote on other women while you completely ignore her.
4. Don’t do things that you have disallowed her from doing, making her feel like a little child who cannot think for herself.
5. Don’t ignore her when she is emotionally down or physically tired. Don’t say things like, “I am tired of you. When you get out of your nasty moods, let me know!”
6. Don’t hug and embrace other ladies endlessly while you don’t even hold her hands in public. Go out of your way and offer some PDA! Public Display of Affection!
7. Don’t leave her alone to do all the house chores while still expecting her to be an amazon in bed later in the night. That would be insensitive.
8. Don’t watch football all day and all night while refusing to let her watch her favorite programs. Don’t make her look like an idiot for her preference of programs. Join her to watch sometimes, and encourage her to join you as well.
9. Don’t forget or deliberately ignore her special days like birthdays and other anniversaries. Rather go out of your way to set notifications so that you can surprise her on those special days.
May God grant more understanding
CONFESSION FOR THE DAY I am good spouse
PRAYER FOR THE DAY Lord, bless our marriage
THOUGHT FOR THE DAY Pro 5:18 (KJV) Let thy fountain be blessed: and rejoice with the wife of thy youth.
Have you ever seen a Nollywood movie where the couple are close or seen a couple where the wife is so loving?
I am sure you also must have seen couples who just seem to be close but there is something that just doesn’t add up, they are in one way or another disconnected.
When there is a disconnect and you are sensitive, you just know it, you just pick it up and are able to discern it.
Either the wife is cheating or the husband is cheating or they are just not agreed. Well apart from both couples praying together, there are some practical things the wife can do to be a good wife. The kind of wife any husband will be proud to call his wife.
1. Be loyal to your husband 2. Make your husband and his affair matter to you 3. Seek to do whatever he likes and things that pleases him. 4. Be thoughtful of and about your husband. 5. Cook his meals, serve them yourselves and make it a special something 6. Be fun to be with every time 7. Be a defender of your spouse anytime and always 8. Be his cheerleader and make him feel good about himself always 9. Enjoy the company of your husband every time 10. Absolutely let your husband trust you 11. Be gist partners 12. Be his confidant and his companion 13. Be his prayer partner and a prayer warrior for him 14. Be his mum, wife, side chick and flirt with him 15. Be his collaborator, his manager and his covenant partner
You may not be these naturally but you can engage in the place of prayer. Be the specific things you want to see yourself become.
Be focused and decisive about what is it you want to see your self become. Let it be as your goal. Let it be SMART. Specific, Measurable, Achievable, Realistic and Time bound.
The Lord will help us in Jesus name.
God bless your marriage.
CONFESSION FOR THE DAY My marriage is a blessing
PRAYERS FOR THE DAY Oh Lord, do a miracle in my marriage today.
THOUGHT FOR THE DAY Marriage is honourable in all, and the bed undefiled: but whoremongers and adulterers God will judge. – Heb 13:4 (KJV)
ACTION PLAN FOR THE DAY Put the above points to use.
5. He does not want you to provoke your children unnecessarily.
God does not want you to take out what you feel or how you feel on the children. Don’t transfer your aggression to them or else they will grow up doing exactly the same things to their siblings and then their spouses. What you do to children and around them goes a long way to influence their thought patterns and outlook on life.
Fathers, do not provoke or irritate or fret your children [do not be hard on them or harass them], lest they become discouraged and sullen and morose and feel inferior and frustrated. [Do not break their spirit.] (Col 3:21 AMP)
Parents, don’t come down too hard on your children or you’ll crush their spirits. (Col 3:21 MSG)
6. He does not want you to deny your husband sexual pleasure.
Never do this for any reason! It is unwise under any circumstance unless, of course, you are certain that your husband would transmit STDs as a result of his lifestyle. Many wives have unwittingly pushed their husbands into the waiting hands of adulterous women by starving their husbands with Jeru trip. It is not a wise thing to do. Jeru trip means to your husband much more than it means to you!
Let me drive home the point with this illustration. A couple held themselves in a good embrace at night and in a split second the husband is ready for Jeru trip and was warming up for that. To his consternation, the wife said “No. “I just wanted you to hold me, that’s all, no Jeru trip!” The husband, all worked up went to bed with a serious headache.
A few days after that, they went on a shopping spree. The wife saw some jewelry, clothes, and designer shoes and the husband asked her to pick them all. Then she saw skirt suits and trouser suits. The husband still said she could pick them. She was enraptured. As they moved over to the counter to pay, the husband said, No! I just wanted you to hold them. Hold them tight, that’s all!
7. He does not want you to nag or disrespect your husband.
Nagging is dangerous to marriage! Every man detests it. It will never work, so don’t resort to it.
8. He does not want you to discuss your husband with others.
Never make that mistake. That male colleague that seems to have a listening ear is really looking for ways to take you to bed at the end of the day. With a few exceptions, though.
That other guy with whom both of you exchange marital challenges and how your spouses have not been good is not a good relationship to keep. There would soon be an emotional affair and then it will be taken to a physical level if care is not taken.
CONFESSION FOR THE DAY God is my strength. He will guide me in the right path.
PRAYERS FOR THE DAY Lord, I ask that you open my eyes of understanding in Jesus name
THOUGHT FOR THE DAY Eph 5:33 KJV Nevertheless let every one of you in particular so love his wife even as himself; and the wife see that she reverence her husband.
ACTION PLAN FOR THE DAY Take an inventory of your life in the light of God’s principles
2. He does not want you to place your work/career before your family.
You should never make that mistake. Your family comes first and the wife is really the homemaker. If you do not put priority on your home, you make your husband vulnerable and make the children grow in a defective way.
While it is good to pursue your career, your family must come first. Too many women have pursued their career at the expense of losing their husbands and children. The key here is balance.
3. He does not want you to live a life of depression and unhappiness.
God wants you to be a happy wife! He wants you to create an atmosphere of joy in the home and not that of gloominess and despondency. A woman can literally change the mood in the house! That is how powerful women are.
Take it easy. Be humorous. Learn to relax and don’t be too closed up in your own worldview.
A cheerful heart brings a smile to your face; a sad heart makes it hard to get through the day. (Pro 15:13 MSG)
4. He does not want you to get involved with adulterous relationships.
Don’t try to revenge on your husband’s attitude by developing affairs with colleagues and friends. It may make your flesh feel good in revenge, but in the real sense of it, it will bring untold anguish and heartache. Your life will slip down to that of deception, lies, and other false intrigues.
The conscience can become seared until one sees nothing wrong in having adulterous flings just to feel good and ‘enjoy life”. Don’t cheat on your husband, the consequences are debilitating and crushing. Adultery is a stolen pleasure and the spiritual implications are not good for anybody.
Stolen bread tastes sweet, but soon your mouth is full of gravel. (Pro 20:17 MSG)
CONFESSION FOR THE DAY God is my strength. He will guide me in the right path.
PRAYERS FOR THE DAY Lord, I ask that you open my eyes of understanding in Jesus name
THOUGHT FOR THE DAY Eph 5:33 KJV Nevertheless let every one of you in particular so love his wife even as himself; and the wife see that she reverence her husband.
ACTION PLAN FOR THE DAY Take an inventory of your life in the light of God’s principles
1. He Does Not Want You To Be Disobedient or Rebellious To Your Husband.
God wants you as a wife to be obedient and submissive to your husband. Let’s look at the scriptures;
IN LIKE manner, you married women, be submissive to your own husbands [subordinate yourselves as being secondary to and dependent on them, and adapt yourselves to them], so that even if any do not obey the Word [of God], they may be won over not by discussion but by the [godly] lives of their wives, When they observe the pure and modest way in which you conduct yourselves, together with your reverence [for your husband; you are to feel for him all that reverence includes: to respect, defer to, revere him–to honor, esteem, appreciate, prize, and, in the human sense, to adore him, that is, to admire, praise, be devoted to, deeply love, and enjoy your husband]. -1Peter 3:1-2 (AMP)
Now wives, there is no way you follow the above scripture and you will not have victory in your marriage.
Why? Because it is the word of God and His word never fails. Take a look at it again!
You are to feel for him all that reverence includes: to respect, defer to, revere him–to honor, esteem, appreciate, prize, and, in the human sense, to adore him, that is, to admire, praise, be devoted to, deeply love, and enjoy your husband].
That is how to make your husband love you like no man’s business!
Before you give up in that marriage, before you start complaining, make sure you obey what God instructs you to do here.
Notice that includes uncooperative husbands, the scripture says you can win them over by your attitude! That is how powerful a woman is.
To be continued…
CONFESSION FOR THE DAY God is my strength. He will guide me in the right path.
PRAYERS FOR THE DAY Lord, I ask that you open my eyes of understanding in Jesus name
THOUGHT FOR THE DAY Nevertheless let every one of you in particular so love his wife even as himself; and the wife see that she reverence her husband. – Ephesians 5:33 (KJV)
ACTION PLAN FOR THE DAY Take an inventory of your life in the light of God’s principles