Four Ways To Guard Against Adultery. There are steps you take and your destination can be predicted. It is just a matter of time. Every step you take, whether good or bad, is meant to lead to a destination. You cannot be on the path that leads to the house of ‘Mr. Marital Wrong’ and expect to find yourself in ‘Mrs. Marital Bliss apartment.’ It does not work that way in natural things; so don’t expect it to work out in your marriage.
There is a way which seemeth right unto a man, but the end thereof are the ways of death. (Pro 14:12 KJV)
Here are some steps you avoid taking if you don’t want to find yourself in adultery.
1. Guard your mind
Adultery starts in the mind. The seed first makes its contact with the mind where it is just a seed of simple admiration. You toy with a first glance and then a good look. It is still a ‘secret’ admiration. But like every seed, it has the potential of growing and becoming a forest. Wise men and women guard their minds and kill the seed of adultery. Don’t give it space, suffocate it, it is unnecessary.
You can admire anybody but desiring someone that is not your spouse is simply uncalled for. Simple innocent admiration can lead to an emotional affair and eventually adultery. At this stage also, you begin to wonder if he/she admires you too, finds you attractive, and enjoys your company. You desire to see him or check him out and consciously make yourself attractive to him/her, you even flaunt your admirable qualities for his/her observation.
2. Guard your heart
The second step into adultery after an unguarded mind is an unguarded heart. The heart is deeper than the mind and at this stage, you develop deeper emotional bonding. You deceive yourself that nothing is going on but in actual fact, this person begins to occupy your thoughts, you even imagine and fantasize your being together, you desire and work out a time to spend together without hesitation.
At this stage, the thoughts of him or her becomes an obsession despite knowing that it is wrong. You start acting it out in your heart. The seed begins to sprout, in no time the fruits will spring forth.
To be continued…
CONFESSION FOR THE DAY I guard my heart, mind, mouth, and body. I take responsibility for the things I do.
PRAYERS FOR THE DAY Lord, let the fear and love of God keep me on the right path in Jesus name
THOUGHT FOR THE DAY After all, we don’t want to unwittingly give Satan an opening for yet more mischief – we’re not oblivious to his sly ways! (2Co 2:11 MSG)
ACTION PLAN FOR THE DAY Have a ‘to-do list’ Plan today. Replace every wrong thought with God’s word
In our many years of counseling married couples, we have had to handle different kinds of issues in marriage. Some of the issues, simple and direct while others are pretty complicated and not direct at all.
The Holy Spirit helps us handle these issues. Some of these issues have their root causes in some generational issues, a complex parental issue, a background issue or a habit that was developed while growing up.
Some husbands are good with silent treatment to their wives. There could be a lot of reasons responsible for this kind of treatment but it takes digging into the issue to get to the root cause.
It will be good to note that there could be different things responsible for such actions. The husband could be frustrated at the wife nagging. The husband could be having issues at work. The husband might have difficulties communicating his deepest feelings. The husband might grow up seeing his dad do the same to his mum. The husband may be involved in extra marital affairs, thus his cold actions. The husband might be dealing with issues that the wife knows nothing about. It could be an act of wickedness on the husband’s part.
So, in the scenario above, let’s assume we are in the shoes of the wife, we have to be tactical in finding out the real cause of our husband’s coldness. E.g if he is cold because he is having an affair and we treat it as having issues at work or overact believing he is mean, we would have ended up majoring on the minor and minoring in the major, and not dealing with the issue.
That is why we have to depend on the Holy Spirit in handling issues in our marriage. Some issues may be complicated while some are not as complicated.
Let’s try to be more patient and think deep through the issues that may arise in our marriage.
Let’s also be prayerful, asking God for the spirit of wisdom and revelation. We also need discernment to discern the root cause of issues.
God bless your marriage.
CONFESSION FOR THE DAY I am a discerning spouse.
PRAYER FOR THE DAY Pray for the spirit of discernment.
THOUGHT FOR THE DAY Romans 8:14 For as many as are led by the Spirit of God, they are the sons of God.
The Family Altar And Your Marriage. You can have the eyes of the Lord upon you as a family and leave His presence with the assurance that He is around you.
The eyes of the Lord cannot be upon you and you not have His presence. His presence is all you need in this life. His presence is the carrier of His glory, His wisdom, His beauty, His intelligence, His understanding, and all of His personality.
His presence gives all-round victory.
The eyes of the LORD are upon the righteous, and his ears are open unto their cry. – Psa 34:15
There is an assurance that comes to you as you gather together as a family to call upon the Lord. That’s one of the reasons the family altar or devotion is very important.
In my family, we didn’t use to have family devotion before. We all woke up at different times and had our prayers separately. My husband was busy with our online ministry and had a different waking time. He was so busy that at times he will be up from 3 am and wouldn’t leave his desk until 9 am or 10 am.
Did you miss out on yesterday’s devotional, we’ve got you covered kindly go HERE. For KHC video Devotionals kindly go HERE
Thank God things have since changed and now our day does not start without our family devotion, where we pray, take daily confessions, and read the Bible.
During our family devotion this morning, I learnt that the eyes of the Lord are upon the righteous, and His ears open to their cry. When we come together as a family, the Lord’s presence is with us. He sees us and He is there. Our gathering together is not a waste of time or religion.
We come together as a family and are confident that He is with us and that His eyes and ears are present with our family. We approach our altar with this attitude.
We also leave our family altar with confidence and assurance that God is with us. We know that we are not alone as we go about our daily activities. Whatever we face in the course of the day, we know He is with us. We rejoice all day knowing that He has got our backs.
God bless your marriage.
CONFESSION FOR THE DAY I know that God is with me as I go out today.
PRAYER FOR THE DAY Pray for the grace to always stay faithful to your family’s devotion
THOUGHT FOR THE DAY Psalm 34:15 [ESV] The eyes of the Lord are toward the righteous and his ears toward their cry.
This happens a lot and I get to hear this from time to time.
Pastor, I don’t have feelings for him again.
Pastor, I don’t have feelings for her again.
I will tell you five things quickly that will put things in perspective and help you judge your loss of “feelings” whether they are genuine or just some ruse.
1. Feelings are different from conviction
A feeling is the voice of your flesh. It is an emotional state. A conviction is the work of the Holy Spirit in your life.
So, when it comes to relationship and falling in love, as a child of God, you need to ask, is it just feelings I have for this person or do I have a “leading” from God?
They are two different things entirely.
2. Feelings are fickle
Feelings are not bad in themselves, it is just that you should not trust them.
They are fickle, and they don’t have a forever a status.
You can wake up with seven different feelings for a supposed loved one in seven different days.
They are also temporal and they often don’t last. Feelings come and go!
Feelings are not deep. They are surface surfers. Feelings cannot endure. Feelings are like fair weather friends.
3. You will not always have feelings for him or her
The next thing you need to realize is that you will not always have feelings for him or her.
So, in effect, feelings cannot be a standard for measuring your love!
Even in marriage, there are times you wake up to see your spouse and all the feelings have gone on holiday to Bahamas or some Island of no communication!
What do you do? Are you going to file for divorce?
You see, beyond your feelings, there must be a genuine commitment arising from a conviction towards the person you want to get married to!
So, you cannot afford to be led by what you “feel” alone.
Feelings are too weak to sustain you in the midst of love adventure. Feelings will abandon you at the slightest pressure.
It is only conviction that can travel the whole length with you, in cold or summer!
To be continued…
CONFESSION FOR THE DAY I am led by the spirit of God. My feelings do not control me.
PRAYER FOR THE DAY Lord, lead me to the rightful person for me
THOUGHT FOR THE DAY Romans 8:14 For as many as are led by the Spirit of God, they are the sons of God.
Celebration is the source of life and joy. Keep Celebrating. If you want to experience constant life and joy in marriage, learn to celebrate. Let there be a constant feast in your marriage.
By feast, I don’t mean a party. It is more of the condition of the heart than it is a physical thing.
All the days of the afflicted are evil: but he that is of a merry heart hath a continual feast. – Pro 15:15
All forms of moodiness and gloominess are not meant to be allowed in your home. You have to learn to disallow certain things in your home and family. You allow joy and happiness.
Celebration is something you practice consciously. You make it a habit in your family. There are a lot of opportunities to celebrate that God brings our way. We should seize these opportunities.
Celebration puts us in faith. Abraham celebrated God by giving glory to God even when the covenant child was not even born. His celebration kept his faith alive.
Did you miss out on yesterday’s devotional, we’ve got you covered kindly go HERE. For KHC video Devotionals kindly go HERE
When you learn to celebrate, you acknowledge God as the source of your very life. You recognize God as the Lord over your marriage.
There are several opportunities in which we have to be sensitive to celebrate. Some people in a bid to appear humble say to celebrate is not to be sober like the Bible says. But the same bible says we should rejoice and again it says we should rejoice.
To celebrate is to be thankful and grateful. Celebrate every of your birthday. Celebrate the life and the lives of all those around you. Be grateful to God for victory and sparing your life. Many have been laid aside, so be grateful and celebrate life.
Celebrate your children. Celebrate your husband. Celebrate events. Create memorials. Celebrate the beginning of the term for your children. Celebrate the end of term. Celebrate anniversaries, Christmas, holidays. Look into each and find out what to celebrate.
Make things special. Make every dinner and lunch a memorable one. Let your spouse and children have sweet memories. Celebrate your pastors, your boss. Celebrate your parents, your siblings, celebrate everything and anything.
As you celebrate, you will have more reasons to celebrate.
God bless your marriage
CONFESSION FOR THE DAY I choose to celebrate at every opportunity I get.
PRAYER FOR THE DAY Lord, teach me how to love my husband/wife well
THOUGHT FOR THE DAY Eph 5:25 [KJV]Husbands, love your wives, even as Christ also loved the church, and gave himself for it;
