The Answer is Yes! You can marry an imperfect person because nobody is perfect. Nobody!
We are all a work in progress.
But wait… let’s make some clarifications.
An imperfect person is not someone who is living in an unrepentant habitual sin, sinning willfully and enjoying the pleasures of sin.
In other words, I am saying, you cannot marry someone who is living consistently in habitual sin, with no remorse or repentance.
Such a person is going to get you into trouble and drag you into misery.
About being imperfect, the scriptures let us know we will get better as we stay in the Word, study the Word, pray in the Spirit, and pay attention to the things of the Spirit.
Is your lover doing all these?
Can I Marry An Imperfect Person?
Check the scriptures:
2Co 3:18 (KJV) But we all, with open face beholding as in a glass the glory of the Lord, are changed into the same image from glory to glory, even as by the Spirit of the Lord.
Again we see here:
Rom 12:2 (KJV) And be not conformed to this world: but be ye transformed by the renewing of your mind, that ye may prove what is that good, and acceptable, and perfect, will of God.
We are promised a change as we pay attention to the Word.
This is entirely different from a habitual sinner. He is not interested in changing or getting better in God.
He may profess interest in change with his mouth, but his heart is far from that.
He or she is not interested in God’s word, he is only religious, and he goes to church.
He is a serial fornicator. He plays sports with sin.
The Bible warns against such people.
Can I Marry An Imperfect Person?
Here are some clear instructions:
1Co 5:9-11 (MSG) I wrote you in my earlier letter that you shouldn’t make yourselves at home among the sexually promiscuous. [10] I didn’t mean that you should have nothing at all to do with outsiders of that sort. Or with crooks, whether blue- or white-collar. Or with spiritual phonies, for that matter. You’d have to leave the world entirely to do that! [11] But I am saying that you shouldn’t act as if everything is just fine when one of your Christian companions is promiscuous or crooked, is flip with God or rude to friends, gets drunk or becomes greedy and predatory. You can’t just go along with this, treating it as acceptable behavior.
You are not to be friends with such people and not to talk about getting married to such because of perceived benefits.
I will continue where I stopped two days ago. Previously, I wrote about the fact that God gave every woman the ability and capacity to be a builder.
Our text in Proverbs 14:1 KJ V says,
“Every wise woman buildeth her house: but the foolish plucketh it down with her hands’.
We also talked about how we need to build according to the pattern.
Ex 25:40 And look that thou make them after their pattern, which was shewed thee in the mount.
God is the architect, He gives us the blueprint of what we should build, the material to use in building, and how we should build. It is building according to the pattern that makes us wise women who build our homes.
Today, we will be looking at how we should build our homes and families.
1. We should build with prayers
Jud 1:20-But ye, beloved, building up yourselves on your most holy faith, praying in the Holy Ghost,
Our homes and families have different aspects just like any building has different sections and areas like the sitting room, the bathroom, the bedroom, the kitchen etc. Each of these different component of the building have different functionalities and you cannot replace them with each other. In the same way, the different aspects of our homes and families need to be built up through prayers.
You must build every aspect of your home, marriage, and family with prayers. As a woman, you are not permitted to joke with prayers. Pray for each child. In fact, praying for them starts from conception. And the best way to pray for your children is in tongues as the Holy Spirit grants you utterance. You pray for and about your spouse and every detail of his life. It is an assignment. Your husband’s success should be your prayer burden. Pray for yourself because you are also part of that building. It is full-time work. There are so many aspects of your home and marriage that you build up through prayers.
2. We should build with the Word
Luk 6:47 Whosoever cometh to me, and heareth my sayings, and doeth them, I will shew you to whom he is like:
Luk 6:48 He is like a man which built an house, and digged deep, and laid the foundation on a rock: and when the flood arose, the stream beat vehemently upon that house, and could not shake it: for it was founded upon a rock.
The word of God is our only guarantee of a strong and solid foundation for our homes, marriage, and families. The infallible word of God is what ensures that what we are building stands the test of time and can weather the storms of life. So that whatever beats against our family and marriage, we will still be standing.
When we take time to build intentionally with fervent and continuous prayers and the Word of God we are wise. Don’t let us be like the foolish builder in Luke 6:49. Let’s learn to build according to the pattern God has shown us.
It is my prayer that we will be wise indeed and that the Lord will give us strength and Grace to carry on His mandate for our lives as women.
Today, we’ll look at the signs of an unhappy or dying relationship and marriage. This will allow us to diagnose and eliminate these problems swiftly. Let’s get started.
Signs of a Dying Relationship or Marriage
1. When trust has died and has been cremated
The foundation of any marriage’s success is trust.
Create trust! Please don’t break it! Without trust, the marriage has no foundation.
How do you sever trust?
When you consistently disappoint your partner with lies and deception, trust will crumble. When confidence in a marriage is lost, the end is imminent. You cannot do without trust! Build trust deliberately through honesty.
Do everything you can to maintain trust by being truthful to a fault. Let your spouse r finance be able to line up your words with your actions! Be completely honest.
A trust may be re-established once it has been destroyed, but it takes time and perseverance.
Signs of a Dying Relationship or Marriage
2. When the couple disregards God
There is really little you can accomplish without God.
God is the one who builds homes. God is the architect of marriage.
It is a waste of time to strive to construct without God.
Psa 127:1 (KJV) Except the LORD build the house, they labour in vain that build it: except the LORD keep the city, the watchman waketh but in vain.
As a form of retaliation, some couples engage in adulterous acts. It is only a matter of time before the impending crash becomes apparent.
Iniquity is always a destructive path. Don’t toe that path!
Sin’s wages are death, thus when sin enters a marriage system, it dies by default.
I pray your marriage does not end in divorce!
I prophesy over your marriage and household, and I pray that God will protect you in Jesus’ name!
Life as a married couple is extremely demanding and requires a lot of wisdom.
There are many areas you should focus on as couples. This morning, I will be identifying just a few of these areas as we all make up our minds to work on our marriages. Singles should learn from this too as a preparation for their wedding.
Pay attention to these details, and your marriage will flourish.
Focus On These Areas In Marriage
1. You should never make your partner feel threatened.
Marriage is a collaboration, not a boss-bondmaid relationship. Nobody is better or worse than anyone else.
Learn to value one another as human beings first. The husband is the head of the household, but it does not make him superior.
The wife is to submit but that does not mean she should be muted and silenced in the home.
Husbands must come into that place of maturity to give wings to their wives to fly while wives must learn to be a help meet indeed by fully submitting to their wives and respecting them.
Focus On These Areas In Marriage
2. Never allow for adultery or infidelity.
It is never worth it, no matter how much you are tempted. Adultery will always be regarded as a dumb sin.
Extramarital affairs are frequently extremely expensive. Nothing compares to the cost of shattered trust.
Stay together and eliminate every emotional interference.
3. Never deny each other.
Don’t deprive your spouse of the enjoyment God intended for sex in marriage. Try various styles. Proper hygiene is also essential.
On the other hand, singles are to keep their bodies under and not indulge in sexual compromise.
The biblical instruction remains the same, sex should be kept till after the wedding! God is not about to change that injunction!
Focus On These Areas In Marriage
4. Maintaining secrets in a marriage is a dead end.
It is likely that you withhold certain sensitive subjects from your spouse for a better time. But no secrets, please. Be open and be transparent with one another. Whatever is covered never heals, and moreover, if your partner had to discover themselves, the trust would have been broken.
If this has happened once, forgive and move on but learn from it!
The Crazy Thing About “I Do” The day you walked down that aisle and said “Ido,” something happened. It’s almost crazy! Your body is no longer your own, it belongs to your spouse.
A fusion takes place in the realm of the spirit, which is so strong that God proclaimed, “let no man put asunder!”
God becomes the witness of this union, and any attempt to drive a wedge in between this union is coming against God Himself.
As couples who are believers, and well-grounded, the weapon of the devil against you is strategic.
If you are a weak believer with no firm resolve, he can easily bring adultery and infidelity to the table and you will be swept off your feet if you are far from God.
But with those who may be grounded, the devil still has strategies. His weapon is to keep you divided, torment you in your thoughts, and keep you perpetually in strife.
You are not in adultery, but in your mind, you are probably worse off.
This will affect the whole family because your thoughts are magnetic and will determine many things around you.
How will you pray and agree together when the mind of one of the spouses is riddled with doubt, contempt, and dislike for the other?
This is the devil. And you get to know this in little things.
Your spouse is easily excited talking to others but irritated when you are alone.
The friend you saw in your spouse as courting sweethearts has evaporated into thin air!
Sometimes, this shows up as singles in courtship too. Unexplainable and perpetual irritation from one party could be an indication of deep-seated issues.
Before you start blaming him or her, you should take responsibility first for where you find yourself, humble yourself and ask God to help you.
It is another problem entirely when you keep blaming your spouse for your own actions, neglect, and carelessness. That can be unfair and you will never change that way.
It is like a General Manager who keeps blaming his employees for losses and the employees who keep blaming the Manager for their ineffectiveness. That organization is in a quandary!
Stop the blame game! It is a trap of the devil.
See, there is no point wasting your time, there is much to do!
Why would you fast forty days and then use four days of strife to rubbish everything?
Why would you sow seeds for years and then pull them out with careless, selfish thoughts and words?
Common, get on the same page and combine your weapons against the enemy of your soul.
From the day you got married, you can no longer do it alone!
So, get over trivial issues, be it husband or wife, and be on the same page so that you can both enjoy the fullness of God’s blessings in your life.
As singles in courtship, you are simply dissipating a lot of power when you entertain strife continually!
May God bless your relationship, marriage, and home.
CONFESSION FOR THE DAY I will cooperate with my spouse
PRAYER FOR THE DAY Devil, take your hands off my marriage in Jesus name
THOUGHT FOR THE DAY Rom 14:16 (KJV) Let not then your good be evil spoken of
ACTION PLAN FOR THE DAY Write down what you love about your fiance/spouse and thank God for those things.
