What kind of lover should you not marry? Follow me this morning.
They that were foolish took their lamps, and took no oil with them: But the wise took oil in their vessels with their lamps.
Mat 25:3-4 (KJV)
The lamp represents the pulchritude, it is that which is seen, it is that which attracts.
It is often polished and shiny. With all the hips, tips and lips in place.
But not all have oil in their vessel. Their lamp is only burning for a while.
Before you choose, check beyond the lamp, and be sure he has oil in his vessel.
A lamp without extra oil is an empty facade. The shame will soon be obvious to all.
Does he have the fear of God? Is she filled with the Holy Ghost?
Don’t go for phonetics alone, be sure he or she can speak in tongues. Demons have no respect for phonetics.
Afflictions of life engendered by wicked spirits can snuff out the light of the lamp quickly.
Without an extra oil, the lamp is useless, a fake life, devoid of life and substance, a shame in waiting, a disaster on queue!
I challenge you not to fall in love with foolishness.
The lyrics of Beyonce or the tune of Fela will not bail you out in the days of trouble. What is a professed child of God doing with curse-filled lyrics and music?
Invariably, you are what you listen to! You will need the word of the living God.
Plastic Christianity without a depth will lead to frustration. Religion without a deliberate relationship with God will embarrass you soonest.
Are you getting married to his bank account or the true riches of the kingdom? Money is different from wealth. There are billionaires who are bound by the spirit of poverty!
If you have no oil in your vessel, don’t ask me out!
To be concluded tomorrow.
CONFESSION FOR THE DAY I make the right choice in God.
PRAYER FOR THE DAY Lord, help me to choose wisely.
THOUGHT FOR THE DAY Isaiah 30:21 And thine ears shall hear a word behind thee, saying, This is the way, walk ye in it, when ye turn to the right hand, and when ye turn to the left.
We will be looking at finding and keeping the love of your life.
1. Where to get a good wife
House and riches are the inheritance from fathers, but a wise, understanding, and prudent wife is from the Lord.
Pro 19:14 (AMP)
A good, wise, understanding and prudent wife can only come from one source and that is from the Lord, period.
It won ’t come from clubbing around. It won’t come from sampling ladies around. It will only come from the Lord.
It is simply logical then, that a deliberate, conscious relationship with God is a must to have a good family and make a good choice.
How else can you ask God for a prudent wife without having a relationship with Him?
In essence, you want a good spouse? Go after God first, since a prudent wife comes from Him.
If the Bible says there are prudent, wise women, then it means that there are wives that are foolish and not prudent. Trust me, you want a prudent wife!
Your choice of a life partner will either make you or mar you, a delight or a disaster. Your choice will make your home a haven or an oven.
What if you are already married and you feel your wife is not prudent? Of which you may be wrong! But let’s assume that is how you feel.
What you do is to go back to God and retrace your steps. He will tell you what to do, He will give you wisdom on how to go about it.
The solution to the imbroglio you are facing in your home and marriage now is with God. Take time to find that out before you take rash decisions.
CONFESSION FOR THE DAY God will lead me to a prudent wife.
PRAYER FOR THE DAY Lord, open the eyes of my understanding.
THOUGHT FOR THE DAY Proverbs 19:14 (KJV) House and riches are the inheritance of fathers: and a prudent wife is from the LORD.
The ultimate goal of every marriage is for both the husband and the wife to grow increasingly in love and intimate with each other.
When you look at your marriage, can you say of the truth that you and your spouse are growing in love?
You may start out not being so close with each other in terms of understanding each other, but as the years roll by, you should be growing in intimacy.
However, it takes some couples longer years to grow to that level of intimacy. Some couples are like cat and mouse. They have not been able to work out their differences.
It is like a rat race, the husband always wants the wife to be exactly like him and vice versa. They always want to fashion their wife into what they want or what they feel she should be like. The same thing with the wife, always trying to make her husband into her image of what a husband should be.
God has not called us to the ministry of changing our spouses. It is a futile ministry, a ministry that will never prosper. If anything, you will end up having a spouse who is a clone of himself or herself.
Did you miss out on yesterday’s devotional, we’ve got you covered kindly go HERE. For KHC video Devotionals kindly go HERE
Allow your spouse to grow at his/her pace. Don’t try to change your spouse. Your spouse is not essentially your primary responsibility in terms of monitoring him /her. Do more prayer and intercession for your spouse and allow God to get through to him/her.
Don’t let us be too hasty in judging our spouse. Let’s learn to rather commend them to God and to the word of his grace which is able to build up and give them an inheritance among them that are sanctified, as instructed in Acts 20:32
Here are some characters to watch out for that can hinder intimacy in marriage
1. Immaturity Learn to handle things in your marriage maturely. Learn to separate issues from your spouses’ personality.
2. Being temperamental When you are too strong on your personality or being a difficult person.
3. Being too emotional
4. Not forgiving easily
5. Not respecting your spouse as an individual and God’s child.
6. Not being easy to talk with
7. Lack of understanding If you don’t understand that you and your spouse are different and that you see things from different standpoints, intimacy is going to be difficult
All these and much more are things that can prevent any marriage from experiencing the intimacy they so much desire.
God bless your marriage.
CONFESSION FOR THE DAY I choose to be intimate with my spouse
PRAYER FOR THE DAY Oh Lord, teach me how to love my spouse with all my heart
THOUGHT FOR THE DAY Gen 2:24[NKJV] Therefore a man shall leave his father and mother and be joined to his wife, and they shall become one flesh.
ACTION PLAN FOR THE DAY Register for KHC Couples camp meeting
In marriage, our intentions don’t count as much as our actions. So verbalizing our affection to our spouse is very important. Learn To Verbalize Your Love To Your Spouse
It does something to the wife hearing from her husband that she is the best cook in the world. Honestly, she will want to live to the expectation of her husband and the name he has called her.
Of course, what is good for the goose is also good for the gander. Husbands also respond to words spoken to them by their wives. If you call your husband unromantic, you are right because the little ingenuity he has will be lost and he will be very unromantic. Call your husband romantic, and I believe he will go out of his way to see to it that he is more romantic. All in all, we all respond to words whether negatively or positively.
There is a king and a beast inside every husband. It is the one you call that will come forth. As wives, we should always try to call and address the one that makes you happier. Some wives address the beast and their husbands behave like one.
Also, inside every wife is wisdom, folly, a queen, virtues as well as a beast. Address the one you want. Not just occasional but learn to do it always. If you want the queen, then address her gently and with sweetness. You will see her behavior change.
Did you miss out on yesterday’s devotional, we’ve got you covered kindly go HERE. For KHC video Devotionals kindly go HERE
This is a principle in marriage that I believe God wants us to practice.
In Genesis, where the first marriage existed, we saw Adam using the same principle.
And Adam said, This is now bone of my bones, and flesh of my flesh: she shall be called Woman, because she was taken out of Man. Therefore shall a man leave his father and his mother, and shall cleave unto his wife: and they shall be one flesh.
Gen 2:23-24
In verse 23, God was the one that took a rib from Adam and made a woman, but it was Adam that spoke up and called the woman bone of my bone and flesh of my flesh.
He called her my intimate friend, the one that is like me, the one who meets all my needs perfectly like no one else would. As a result of his confession, the cleaving process was now possible and then they could become one flesh.
The principle is very simple but it requires our commitment.
Say good things that you want to see and believe God has put inside your spouse and you will begin to see your spouse manifest such.
God bless your marriage.
CONFESSION FOR THE DAY I speak positive words to my spouse.
PRAYER FOR THE DAY God teach me how to love my spouse with all my heart
THOUGHT FOR THE DAY Gen 2:23 [TLB] “This is it!” Adam exclaimed. “She is part of my own bone and flesh! Her name is ‘woman’ because she was taken out of a man.”
You are asking this to know if his plans will accommodate and complement your own.
There are some career combinations that just would not go together. Find out if you are getting married to a sailor that may not be around several months of the year!
If you are very clingy and you cannot bear seeing people around your husband, then don’t marry a Pastor!
“Is there anyone here who, planning to build a new house, doesn’t first sit down and figure the cost so you’ll know if you can complete it?
Luk 14:28 (MSG)
4. Sisters and Mum?
How does he relate with mum and sisters? It is an indication of how he would relate to you!
If you hear him over the phone shouting and screaming at his siblings, well, the handwriting is clear on the wall what you should expect in a few weeks after the wedding.
5. Values
What are his values in life? If he goes like “I am a free thinker. I only attend church when I feel like.”
That shows some value conflict, right?
If your values are at variance, it is an indication that numerous quarrels and disagreements are in the offing.
On a final note, please understand these questions are not to turn you into a questionnaire!
The intent is not to use questions to disregard God’s direction.
Did you miss out on yesterday’s devotional, we’ve got you covered. Kindly go HERE. For KHC video Devotionals, kindly go HERE
If all your questions are not properly answered and yet you have the peace of God, please proceed, because it is only God that knows tomorrow.
However, in such cases, you have to make sure it is really peace, and not a feeling.
It is important to ask these questions, pray and seek God’s direction before falling in love.
When you have fallen in love, you really would not care about any questions or answers!
I pray that God will grant us more understanding.
You will not miss it in Jesus name!
Ee o ni bo si owo alawin ni oruko Jesu! (You won’t fall in love with the wrong person in Jesus name)
Be Blessed!
CONFESSION FOR THE DAY I will marry rightly.
PRAYER FOR THE DAY Lord, lead me to the right person for me.
THOUGHT FOR THE DAY Isaiah 30:21 [KJV] And thine ears shall hear a word behind thee, saying, This is the way, walk ye in it, when ye turn to the right hand, and when ye turn to the left.
