Don’t Let Anger Ruin Your Love Life

Don’t Let Anger Ruin Your Love Life

Reading Time: 4 minutes

Don’t Let Anger Ruin Your Love Life. Mr. and Mrs. Johnson were the quintessential couple everybody admired. But what people saw was the pulchritude. Within the family, the demon of anger reigned supreme. In no time the seemingly beautiful marriage was ruined, because of uncontrollable anger. That which could have been one of the best became a mess. Their marital life could have been a counsel to others, but they canceled each other out!

There are some things that will work and there are some things that will not work. Now, you don’t need to spend another five years trying to experiment what will work and what will not work. You only need to be willing to learn. Every time you make a mistake, it has the potential of hardening your heart against God. This is a tactic of the devil, so life is not to be permanently lived on Mistake Street by Error Avenue. You can decide to go for wisdom.

Be slow to get angry. Don’t Let Anger Ruin Your Love Life.
This is what the scripture expressly advises. Not a few have lost precious relationships because of anger tantrums. Now, it is okay to be angry sometimes as a human, I do get angry myself sometimes. But when your anger becomes compulsive, uncontrollable and bothering on violence, you need to be careful.
 
When you get angry, you beat people around you, pick up a fight or destroy things, then you need to consciously pray to God for help. Go on the net and Google ‘anger management’ and get some materials that will help you. Go into the scriptures and study every instance where the words, “anger, angry, wrath, etc occurs.
 
One of such scriptures says
Be not hasty in thy spirit to be angry: for anger resteth in the bosom of fools. (Ecclesiastes 7:9 KJV)
 
In order words, if you get angry too quickly, you are a…. (clearing throat) I didn’t write that, you said it!
 
The translation I like most is this:
Don’t be quick to fly off the handle. Anger boomerangs. You can spot a fool by the lumps on his head. (Ecclesiastes 7:9 Message)

The Message translation isn’t playing at all! The next time, you get so angry, walk away and check the mirror, if you can see the lumps there, relax first before you make a decision! Unnecessary anger will ruin relationships. Anger problems will make you say things you will regret later.
 
See the example of these guys in the scriptures who had serious anger problems.
Simeon and Levi are brethren; instruments of cruelty are in their habitations. O my soul, come not thou into their secret; unto their assembly, mine honour, be not thou united: for in their anger they slew a man, and in their self will they digged down a wall (Genesis 49:5-6 KJV)

Here, their father began to talk about these two brothers who in fits of anger, killed and wiped out a whole community! You see, unnecessary anger will lead to death…death of things, death of relationships, death of opportunities, and even death of marriage!

Do you know how many people have called their lawyers in anger and opted out of marriage, then got married to another person angrily only to discover that the new person is worse? May you not get married to an angry person who has an instrument of cruelty in their habitations. Their father was so furious at their actions and actually placed a curse on them!

Cursed be their anger, for it was fierce; and their wrath, for it was cruel: I will divide them in Jacob, and scatter them in Israel. (Genesis 49:7 KJV)
 
Look at those words: scatter, divide…that is what fierce anger leads to! Don’t Let Anger Ruin Your Love Life
 
If as a single you can see that you have anger issues, don’t ignore it and don’t play the denial card. Talk to your pastor or mentor, get books and read, get into the scripture and study so that your mind can be renewed, and pray to God to help you!
 
Now when you pray to God to help, more people will come your way to get you angry more and provoke you the more, so that each time you lose it, you can really know you need help and then you can consciously begin to work on it.
 
As married couples, if both of you are angry at the same time, it can be dangerous. There are husbands that will not talk to their wives for days. That is not being a man! There are wives that get hurt at everything and will close up their spirits against their husbands. How will your prayers be answered?! You can’t run your home like that! You are trusting God to conceive, yet you are always fighting, don’t you know that is the devil?
 
If one is angry, the other should calm down. Here is some advice for you:
A soft answer turneth away wrath: but grievous words stir up anger. (Proverbs 15:1 KJV)

Try and see how it works. When the other is angry, don’t raise your voice too. Talk in a whisper, the demon of wrath will fly away! You see that demon works by working you up and causing you to vibrate like the fan made in Aba!

So, when you refuse to vibrate and say the wrong words, the demon loses its power!
If he or she goes like, ‘You are crazy! You are mad!’ (That shouldn’t be the language of God’s children)

And then you respond with, ‘Your father is crazy, you mama don craze!”

What do you think will happen?

What about a soft answer, almost a whisper, that goes like, “dear, it is well.” Don’t Let Anger Ruin Your Love Life
 
God will help us all in Jesus’ name.

I rebuke the spirit of anger in your relationship and marriage, I ask the Spirit of God to intervene in your satiation and give you the wisdom to handle it in Jesus’ name!
 
CONFESSION FOR THE DAY
I am not a fool, therefore, I don’t get angry easily.
 
PRAYER FOR THE DAY
I curse every root of anger and wrath in my life in Jesus’ name
 
THOUGHT FOR THE DAY
Make no friendship with an angry man; and with a furious man thou shalt not go: (Proverbs 22:24 KJV)
 
ACTION PLAN FOR THE DAY
Read a book on Anger
 
BIBLE READING
Gen 16

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Learn To Calm Down

Learn To Calm Down

Reading Time: 2 minutes

CHILDREN – Learn To Calm Down

Hello Champ, its another awesome time to learn from God’s word. Today I will be talking to you about anger and why you should always control your temper.

Let me tell you a story about an Angry boy, his name was Tobi.

Tobi was a young child who got angry at the slightest provocation. He had lots of scars on this body from head to toe as a result of always getting into a fight or breaking something when he is angry.

One day, just after the school bell rang for the close of school, while Tobi walked the school hall, one of his classmate ran pass him and mistakenly touched his school bag. Tobi got angry as usual and began shouting and cursing. Then all of a sudden, he charged angrily towards his classmate, aiming to punch him and start a fight. Just as he took the first step, he fell on the floor and landed flat on his face. Immediately, his two front teeth fell out and there was blood every where. Apparently, he stepped on a banana peal that made him slip.

He was rushed to the hospital but the damage was already done. He lost his upper incisors and his upper lip was also stitched.

From that time onward, his missing tooth reminded him to stay calm when he is about to be angry.

King Solomon has a word for you in his book, let’s take a look at it.

He who is slow to anger is better and more honorable than the mighty [soldier], And he who rules and controls his own spirit, than he who captures a city. —Proverbs 16:32 (AMP)

Dear child, it’s always better to be slow to anger, you shouldn’t respond angrily to any thing. Be patient and calm at all times, it is more honorable than showing you can fight or speak more hurtful words than your challenger.

Taking charge of your situation calmly just like the bible says is not equals taking control of a whole city, that action is greater.

Don’t get in a fight with anyone for any reason, learn to calm down at all times.

May God help you.

The Effect of Anger on Your Marriage –Part 2

The Effect of Anger on Your Marriage –Part 2

Reading Time: 3 minutes

COUPLES-

In the early days of our marriage, I get angry very easily. It was a kind of subdued anger, not enough for me to raise my hands against my wife!

I have never done that and will never do that, no matter what! That is not a manly thing to do! It is unscriptural, and your prayers will be hindered when you raise your hands against a lady.

But, I used to be impatient. I am a quick person but my wife takes her time. I wanted to change her. When I am angry, I start lecturing my wife. After a while, I just had to change because the lecturing thing was not working. I had to learn early in marriage, to calm down when I am angry and then discuss it.

Over the years, I have come to learn to smile at some of the things that get me bothered and aggravated and looking back at those years, I wondered why I had to be angry in the first place! We were not meant to be the same way! A book on temperament I read was what delivered me!

If you are married to someone with an anger problem, here is some advice for you.

A soft answer turneth away wrath: but grievous words stir up anger. –Proverbs 15:1 (KJV)

A gentle response defuses anger, but a sharp tongue kindles a temper-fire. –Proverbs 15:1 (MSG)

Don’t get angry together and at the same time! Learn to calm down for each other! Get books and read and deal with that anger so that you don’t end up raising angry children who will take the anger to another level.

He that is slow to anger is better than the mighty; and he that ruleth his spirit than he that taketh a city. –Proverbs 16:32 (KJV)

A few things to do if you have problems with anger

1. Pray about it and ask God to help you by His Spirit                    

2. Seek help from your pastor or mentors

3. Stay in God’s word. Your soul can be restored when you meditate regularly on God’s word

4. Get good books that address the weakness and study

5. Discuss with your spouse and look at how you can deal with the weakness

6. Learn to keep quiet when you are angry. You often say things you will regret later, but the words, like swords could have done harm.

7. Do not make quick decisions while you are angry. Your sense of judgment is warped at such times.

8. Forgive easily. Don’t be revengeful and stubborn. Let God handle the situation for you.

9. Don’t allow anger and hurts to push you into sexual sins because you want to get back at your spouse. That will complicate issues for you.

10. Don’t listen to someone who appears ‘nice’ and wants you to sin when you are hurting badly. It is usually a trap of the devil to complicate issues when a ‘nice’ person suddenly shows up when you are at loggerheads with your spouse. Be careful!

I rebuke every spirit behind anger and wrath in your life, marriage in Jesus name. I pray for God’s help over you in Jesus name.

CONFESSION FOR THE DAY
I am calm. I am not an angry person.

PRAYER FOR THE DAY
Pray that God will give the grace to resist unnecessary anger

THOUGHT FOR THE DAY
Make no friendship with an angry man; and with a furious man thou shalt not go –Proverbs 22:24 (KJV)

ACTION PLAN FOR THE DAY
Read a book on dealing with anger

BIBLE READING FOR THE DAY
Exodus 4-6

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The Effect of Anger on Your Marriage

The Effect of Anger on Your Marriage

Reading Time: 2 minutes

COUPLES-

There is nothing that kills marriages faster than what I want to write about today. Anger! In the verses below, Simeon and Levi are brothers, but their combination was a tragedy! Both of them had anger problems. What was the eventuality? They were divided and scattered!

Simeon and Levi are brethren; instruments of cruelty are in their habitations. O my soul, come not thou into their secret; unto their assembly, mine honour, be not thou united: for in their anger they slew a man, and in their selfwill they digged down a wall. Cursed be their anger, for it was fierce; and their wrath, for it was cruel: I will divide them in Jacob, and scatter them in Israel. –Genesis 49:5-7 (KJV)

That is exactly what happens to two angry unrepentant people in a marriage. That marriage cannot survive it. Look at the way the Message translation puts it:

Simeon and Levi are two of a kind, ready to fight at the drop of a hat. I don’t want anything to do with their vendettas, want no part in their bitter feuds; They kill men in fits of temper, slash oxen on a whim. A curse on their uncontrolled anger, on their indiscriminate wrath. I’ll throw them out with the trash; I’ll shred and scatter them like confetti throughout Israel. –Genesis 49:5-7 (MSG)

One angry person can curse a lot of havoc, not to talk of two angry couples!

Are you the type of person that is ready to fight at the drop of a hat? You need to consciously and deliberately start working on that anger problem because it can ruin precious opportunities.

There is a place for a level of anger because we are all human. There is also a place for righteous indignation. But the type of anger that is dangerous is the one that lingers unnecessarily and makes you do things you will later regret.

This type of anger is almost a stupid one because you know you will eventually regret your words and actions!

Be not hasty in thy spirit to be angry: for anger resteth in the bosom of fools. –Ecclesiastic 7:9 (KJV)

Message translation is quite interesting:

Don’t be quick to fly off the handle. Anger boomerangs. You can spot a fool by the lumps on his head. –Ecclesiastic 7:9 (MSG)

I once heard a man of God in one of his messages, where he said he used to have anger problems until he read the above scriptures.

To be continued

CONFESSION FOR THE DAY
I am calm. I am not an angry person.

PRAYER FOR THE DAY
Pray that God will give the grace to resist unnecessary anger

THOUGHT FOR THE DAY
Make no friendship with an angry man; and with a furious man thou shalt not go –Proverbs 22:24 (KJV)

ACTION PLAN FOR THE DAY
Read a book on dealing with anger

BIBLE READING FOR THE DAY
Exodus 1-3

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One Person You Should Not Fall In Love With

One Person You Should Not Fall In Love With

Reading Time: 2 minutes

SINGLES –

An angry person is one to avoid. Two angry people are dangerous people! Simeon and Levi in the scriptures are brothers, but the Bible says their father placed a curse on them because of their unrestrained violent emotions.

Simeon and Levi are brethren; instruments of cruelty are in their habitations. O my soul, come not thou into their secret; unto their assembly, mine honour, be not thou united: for in their anger they slew a man, and in their selfwill they digged down a wall. Cursed be their anger, for it was fierce; and their wrath, for it was cruel: I will divide them in Jacob, and scatter them in Israel. –Genesis 49:5-7 (KJV)

They were of like tempers, dispositions, and manners, bold, wrathful, cruel, revengeful, and deceitful, and joined together in their evil counsels and evil actions which resulted in the cruel and barbarous slaughter of the inhabitants of Shechem.

If only one brother was angry, the other could have calmed his brother. But both were angry at the same time, so their anger fuelled one another!

Message translation of verse 5 says:

Simeon and Levi are two of a kind, ready to fight at the drop of a hat. –Genesis 49:5 (MSG)

As an individual, you must learn to restrain your anger and learn not to react at every provocation so that eventually when you are married, your home will be a habitable place for your children. What happens when my spouse is angry and raises his/her voice at me?

The answer is here;

A soft answer turneth away wrath: but grievous words stir up anger. –Proverbs 15:1 (KJV)

Learn to talk softly. You will be amazed! Don’t raise your voice back in anger! Just talking softly will make the anger will be defused. Learn this as singles and you will be saving yourself a lot of headaches.

That is the way Message translation puts it.

A gentle response defuses anger, but a sharp tongue kindles a temper-fire. –Proverbs 15:1(MSG)

CONFESSION FOR THE DAY
My heart will guide my mouth, and my lips will promote instruction. Jesus has been made unto me wisdom, and I will keep myself under control.

PRAYERS FOR THE DAY
Give me the grace to be quick to listen, slow to speak, and slow to anger.

THOUGHT FOR THE DAY
Make no friendships with a man given to anger, and with a wrathful man do not associate, -Proverb 22:24 (AMP)

ACTION PLAN FOR THE DAY
Try and identify your anger triggers and to seek help

BIBLE READING FOR THE DAY
John 11

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