Angry situations occur in life. We feel angry when people do or say things about us that we don’t like. Anger is an emotion that can lead us to say harsh words to others.
Your sibling wears your shirt without your permission and stains it. It’s probably happened a couple of times and you have warned him. Yet, he failed to listen but this time you plan to give him a piece of your mind.
Harsh words fly out of your mouth and land on your brother. Soon the poor boy has tears in his eyes or he suddenly loses self-esteem and locks himself up in his room for the whole day. You must therefore learn how to manage angry situations.
Your brother is not right in taking your shirt without your permission. You are not right also with your choice of words.
Instead of your words helping the situation, they have only caused more harm. Choose your words carefully. Don’t speak out of anger. Even when someone hurts you, don’t hurt them back.
May God give you the grace for calming words.
Prayer: Lord, teach me not to speak out of anger to people around me. Amen
We started on the topic “How Couples Can Keep Emotions in Check” Yesterday, we started on this anger issue. I told us anger can be used positively, like the case of Jabez, who changed his story when he got angry.
In the context of marriage, however, you can start handling your anger in a positive way by using these 2 methods.
1. Trace back the source of your anger.
Most people’s anger could be traced to something that happened way back in their past. A parent abandoned them, the death of a loved one, something negative that happened, and so on.
We are angry because of pain. Think back and get the source of what makes you angry. Don’t just ignore it, thinking it will pass away.
Did you miss out on yesterday’s devotional, we’ve got you covered kindly go HERE. For KHC video Devotionals kindly go HERE
2. Admit your anger
What you don’t admit, you cannot take responsibility over. It is until you admit and agree that you have anger problem that is hurting you and your loved ones, it holds its grip over you.
Become vulnerable, admit it as a sin, then and only then can you be free to handle these negative emotions.
Also know that we all express anger for different reasons and in different ways. Don’t judge your spouse. Focus on dealing with your own anger problems before trying to help your spouse.
God bless our marriage
CONFESSION FOR THE DAY I will not be an angry spouse.
PRAYER FOR THE DAY Lord help me recognize the source of my anger and deal with it.
THOUGHT FOR THE DAY Proverbs 22:24 Make no friendship with an angry man; and with a furious man thou shalt not go:
ACTION PLAN FOR THE DAY Register for couples camp meeting
We all have emotions and there’s nothing wrong with having them. What could be wrong is not handling them well.
Whatever God has given us, whether money, relationships, jobs, career, gifts, talents etc, we need to take responsibility over them. Maturity is learning to handle them well, so that they are used to our advantage and not to our disadvantage.
For Example, God gave us all mouths, but do you know that some people have destroyed their marriages by the wrong use of their mouth?
Anger could be used in a positive way if we understand its great potentials. Anger is what makes us desire for things and ourselves to get better. When we get angry over the status quo we find change.
When we get angry at how we are treated by life, we seek something better, a better life for us and our families.
Did you miss out on yesterday’s devotional, we’ve got you covered kindly go HERE. For KHC video Devotionals kindly go HERE
In 1 Chron 4:9-10 it was because Jabez was angry at why a name meaning sorrow was imposed upon him that he could pray and have a change of name and destiny.
If we didn’t have the ability to get angry, we will remain as we are. Anger shows there is a problem to be dealt with. Even God get angry.
The evil of unmanaged anger like any other unmanaged emotions far outweighs the benefits.
In marriage, we must keep our emotions managed. Some couple react to situations in an explosive way while others react angrily in a quiet way. Whether it is an explosive anger or a silent anger both are destructive.
The silent anger is dangerous because it works like hot magma. It silently gathers strength and then in a moment without warning it explodes causing a lot of havoc.
Tomorrow, I will show you practical ways to handle anger in marriage.
God bless your marriage.
CONFESSION FOR THE DAY I will not be an angry spouse.
PRAYER FOR THE DAY Lord help me recognize the source of my anger and deal with it.
THOUGHT FOR THE DAY I have to deal with any source of angry but it destroys me
ACTION PLAN FOR THE DAY Register for KHC couple’s camp meeting
We’ll be discussing the topic “Demonic Activities Versus Fleshly Lust in Marriage” in our devotional for couples today
In severalcounselling sessions I have been privileged to be in with my husband, I have heard cases that are so difficult to resolve.
Now, after a few years of marriage, I have come to realize that some of those messy scenarios have their foundations in demonic influences.
We need to be conscious of this so that it helps us to effectively address issues well. We need to establish the fact that the devil HATES marriage. He loathes it with a perfect hatred. A good marriage irritates him and infuriates him. He is not just a nuisance but an enemy of your marriage and mine.
Having an understanding of who our enemy is, it becomes easier for us to properly wage war against our enemy.
Most of the issues or problems we face in marriage are due to demonic influences. I pray that God will open the eyes of our understanding today to recognize who the real enemy is.
There is the flesh that we all must see to it that we crucify. For example, a choleric husband can be given to anger. He sees himself always getting angry. It could be his flesh. All he has to do is crucify or mortify his flesh. If he doesn’t do that, his marriage will suffer for it.
And they that are Christ’s have crucified the flesh with the affections and lusts. Galatians 5:24 KJV
On the other hand are the activities of the devil through demonic influence or evil spirit. The aim of these spirits is to torment and torture us as married couples. They also don’t want is to know or serve the Lord effectively.
The thief cometh not, but for to steal, and to kill, and to destroy: I am come that they might have life, and that they might have it more abundantly. John 10:10 KJV
The abundant life Jesus came to give us, they want to make sure it is a mirage.
For example, anger becomes demonic when demons or evil spirit makes one angry at every provocation in an uncontrollable and harmful way.
In marriage, your spouse will do things that you don’t like. The devil torments and doesn’t make you enjoy your marriage when there is a spirit of anger.
Some of the emotional or attitudinal issues we experience are the activities of the evil spirits. For example, most depression, fear, rejection, sicknesses, selfishness, etc.
What we need to do to these evil spirits is to cast them out. Cast them out of our marriages and life
Behold, I give unto you power to tread on serpents and scorpions, and over all the power of the enemy: and nothing shall by any means hurt you. Luke 10:19 KJV
I will continue tomorrow by God’s grace.
God bless your marriage.
CONFESSION FOR THE DAY I have control over my weaknesses.
PRAYER FOR THE DAY Pray that God will give you the wisdom to stay above sin
THOUGHT FOR THE DAY Behold, I give unto you power to tread on serpents and scorpions, and overall the power of the enemy: and nothing shall by any means hurt you. Luke 10:19 KJV
I discussed the topic “How To Overcome Hurt In Marriage” yesterday and today, I will be concluding on the topic.
We established that the enemy often seeks to use the weapon of hurt to wrought his 3 fold agenda in marriages which is to steal, kill and destroy. No marriage is immune to the strategies and attacks of the enemy. He will often steal from our marriages, kill and snooze out life from our marriage and totally destroy all that our marriage stands for.
Hurt is a blessing blocker. When you are hurt, your heart cannot receive from God.
Getting rid of hurts and making sure your heart is guarded against any form of hurt that may arise. See the spiritual implication of hurt and what it can potentially do to your marriage.
If you don’t learn to handle your hurts the right way, it will lead to bitterness, which can lead to rage which can lead to all sorts of vices like murder.
There is a right way and a wrong way of handling hurts. Make sure you are not a victim to the deadly poison of hurt.
Some wrong and unhealthy ways to handle hurt include:
1. Vengeance or retaliation. This is when you allow the hurt to get at you so much that you act back based on the hurt. Retaliation could come in various ways, wanting to hurt your spouse back, or inflict pain.
2. Closing your heart We have a tendency to block our hearts as a way of protecting our hearts from further hurts.
3. Rehearsing or replaying the hurt We may also be in the rot of replaying the words or event that hurt us.
I know there are different levels and degree of hurt, but whichever, we have a responsibility of guarding our heart and we have a choice not to be hurt.
The best way to guard our heart against hurts is taking communion. Try it because it works so well. Take communion and plead the blood of Jesus over your heart.
Also take authority over the hurt. Exercise authority over words that cause hurts. Guard your heart against the effect of hurt using these two scriptures
Behold, I give unto you power to tread on serpents and scorpions, and over all the power of the enemy: and nothing shall by any means hurt you. Luke 10:19 KJV
No weapon that is formed against thee shall prosper; and every tongue that shall rise against thee in judgment thou shalt condemn. This is the heritage of the servants of the Lord, and their righteousness is of me, saith the Lord. Isaiah 54:17 KJV
Anytime there is a quarrel between couples and there are exchange of harsh words, you will do well to guard your heart against this hurt.
Even after you have made up and started talking, if not properly dealt with , you could still be nursing the hurt. Get rid of the hurt and don’t allow any root of bitterness defile you.
Let your heart be void of offence, bitterness or hurt against your spouse, siblings, parents, God, life, etc
God bless your marriage.
CONFESSION FOR THE DAY I refuse to be hurt. I refuse to be bitter.
PRAYER FOR THE DAY Lord, help me to forgive those who hurt me.
THOUGHT FOR THE DAY No weapon that is formed against thee shall prosper; and every tongue that shall rise against thee in judgment thou shalt condemn. This is the heritage of the servants of the Lord, and their righteousness is of me, saith the Lord . Isaiah 54:17 KJV
ACTION PLAN FOR THE DAY Decide to get rid of offense
