There are three things I said yesterday that you can do when he or she is insisting.
1. Make it clear 2. Be accountable 3. Ask questions
This is Part two. We started on this yesterday! If you missed it, read it HERE. What more can you do when He is insisting?
The fourth thing you can do if the insistence will not stop is to discontinue the relationship. The continual insistence and stubborn posture to what is clearly wrong can be a symptom of a deeper issue.
You see, most of the issues you will confront in marriage would all be glaring for you to see as singles! But what do we do most times? We close our eyes to the obvious signs and bury ourselves in the mire of love. As they say, love is a blinder, but marriage is an eye opener.
Pastor, why would I stop something I have invested so much in? How will I cope with a broken heart?
Well, a broken heart is better than a broken life! There is no point in getting married to someone who outright disobeys or disregards God’s word. One of the ways you will know if a man or woman will respect you is if such a person respects God!
Anybody who doesn’t respect God, who is nonchalant at the things of God, will lack the capacity to respect you or value your person.
Especially if he or she is threatening you to break up if you don’t yield to the request! Don’t beg! And don’t yield under pressure because you want to keep the relationship.
Let Him Go When He is Stubborn! Hear this, you cannot keep or preserve anything of worth with the vehicle of compromise and disobedience. It has never worked and will never work!
It is better to walk away from compromise than to preserve it and nurture it.
Let Him Go When He is Stubborn! Don’t be like Esau!
Heb 12:16 (KJV) Lest there be any fornicator, or profane person, as Esau, who for one morsel of meat sold his birthright.
The Message Translation explains better:
Heb 12:16 (MSG) Watch out for the Esau syndrome: trading away God’s lifelong gift in order to satisfy a short-term appetite.
Remember, whatever you cooperate with now is a subtle acceptance of such like eventually in marriage!
I pray God will give you more understanding! Be blessed today!
CONFESSION FOR THE DAY I refuse to compromise!
PRAYER FOR THE DAY Lord, teach me your wisdom in my relationship
THOUGHT FOR THE DAY Heb 12:16 (AMPC) That no one may become guilty of sexual vice, or become a profane (godless and sacrilegious) person as Esau did, who sold his own birthright for a single meal. [Gen 25:29-34]
ACTION PLAN FOR THE DAY Read a book on relationships
We will be concluding this topic today and this is Part 3
Yesterday we looked at the second thing that will Sustain you in marriage, which is
2. Discover yourself ( if you missed this, check it HERE).
Things That Will Sustain You In Marriage
3. Discover your purpose.
This is very much similar to the discovery of your Person. It is after you have discovered your person that you can embark on the journey to discover your purpose.
When the purpose of a thing is not known, abuse is inevitable. The purpose of anything determines its function. When your purpose is known, greatness is inevitable because you can move faster to get things done.
Imagine if you have a washing machine and you don’t know what it’s used for. You still take out all your family clothes outside to wash with your hands. What a waste of time and energy.
Fulfillment and joy in life are some dividends of discovering your purpose. There is an inner joy that comes to your life, which your spouse can’t give you knowing you are doing exactly what you have been created to do.
Many spouses are unhappy because they are not doing what they were created to do. Many husbands and wives are doing jobs that are just stressing their lives. They experience burn out and their loved ones partake of their burnout.
Your wife can only help you fulfill the assignment you are aware God gave you.
Your purpose is to be discovered, not decided by you. You don’t decide what you are created to be. Your purpose predates your existence.
Discovery of your purpose is one of the Things That Will Sustain You In Marriage. Our purpose was already determined before God formed us.
Before I formed thee in the belly I knew thee; and before thou camest forth out of the womb I sanctified thee, and I ordained thee a prophet unto the nations. Jeremiah 1:5 KJV
Your Marriage has a purpose. You didn’t just get married to have sex, give birth to babies, have a nice job, live in a fine house, and use bone straight weave on.
This journey to discover purpose is done as you seek God. He is the creator of your life and your marriage. He knows your specific purpose.
Go to His word and seek His face in prayer. Be sincere and intentional, and He will reveal your purpose to you.
Some indications can help in your discovery of purpose. What do you naturally like doing? What are your gifts? What are the things you do without effort?
Take time and discover your purpose.
God bless your marriage
CONFESSION FOR THE DAY God created me for a purpose. He doesn’t created without a purpose. I have open eyes and I discover my purpose
PRAYERS FOR THE DAY Lord, cause the eyes of my understanding to be flooded with light, that I may discover my purpose in life in Jesus name
THOUGHT FOR THE DAY Before I formed thee in the belly I knew thee; and before thou camest forth out of the womb I sanctified thee, and I ordained thee a prophet unto the nations. Jeremiah 1:5 KJV
ACTION PLAN FOR THE DAY Ask God to reveal your purpose and that of your marriage to you.
Ps 103:1 AMP BLESS (AFFECTIONATELY, gratefully praise) the Lord, O my soul; and all that is [deepest] within me, bless His holy name!
2. Father, in the name of Jesus fill every shouter with the spirit of the fear of the Lord, so that we can continue to enjoy the favor of God in our lives
Gen 39: 5,9 KJV And it came to pass from the time that he had made him overseer in his house, and over all that he had, that the LORD blessed the Egyptian’s house for Joseph’s sake; and the blessing of the LORD was upon all that he had in the house, and in the field.
3. Lord, let the eyes of every member of SGN be enlightened in Jesus name
Eph 1:18 KJV the eyes of your understanding being enlightened; that ye may know what is the hope of his calling, and what the riches of the glory of his inheritance in the saints,
4. Father, in the name of Jesus, we decree divine lifting and promotions for every member of SGN
Psalm 75: 6-7 For promotion cometh neither from the east, nor from the west, Nor from the south. But God is the judge: He putteth down one, and setteth up another.
5. Father, let our love for You and your word be ever increasing in our hearts in Jesus name
John 14:21 KJV He that hath my commandments, and keepeth them, he it is that loveth me: and he that loveth me shall be loved of my Father, and I will love him, and will manifest myself to him.
6. Father, we decree in the name of Jesus that your promise to us in SGN this year, to pursue, overtake and recover all be fulfilled
1 Samuel 30:8 KJV And David enquired at the LORD, saying, Shall I pursue after this troop? shall I overtake them? And he answered him, Pursue: for thou shalt surely overtake them, and without fail recover all.
7. Father, we decree, our faith is ever increasing and we overcome every challenges in Jesus name
I John 5:4 KJV For whatsoever is born of God overcometh the world: and this is the victory that overcometh the world, even our faith.
8. Thank God for answered prayers
Psalms 69:30 (KJV) I will praise the name of God with a song, and will magnify him with thanksgiving.
Confession
I boldly declare over us in SGN that we are men and women of faith. We have the God kind of faith. We win and overcome by faith. We experience victory in life by faith. There is divine liftings for us. The eyes of our understanding is flooded with light. We love and serve God. We fear the Lord and does His will in Jesus name.
What Do I Do When He Is Insisting? This happens a lot in relationships, even among believers, where you don’t expect such, You are in a relationship, and he is insisting on consummating the relationship, all pleas falling on deaf ears!
What do you do at such a time?
Interestingly, and on some occasions that I have handled in counseling, it is the lady insisting on it. On one of such, the lady invited the guy over for a discussion. Upon getting there, she asked for sex. The guy refused, but the lady went ahead and stripped naked and then got on him. Of course, it ended where you are thinking!
The reality is that the scripture never asks you to stay in such an atmosphere, rather you were advised to run!
1Co 6:18 (KJV) Flee fornication. Every sin that a man doeth is without the body; but he that committeth fornication sinneth against his own body.
The word “flee” means to “run away as in terror” Like you saw bandits, that is how you the off!
Obviously, you cannot know yourself more than God knows you, and God advises you to run! You are down here, but God who up already sees fire on the mountain!
Back to our topic, What Do I Do When He Is Insisting?
1. Make it clear at the inception of a relationship that you are not there for sex, till after the wedding! It’s good to make it clear before somebody will not allow you to rest!
2. Since both of you are expected to be believers, be accountable and answerable to someone, a mentor or a pastor. That you can easily report yourselves to. That wil make Uncle or Aunty to behave! If you are locked in with an unbeliever, or what else do you expect?
What Do I Do When He Is Insisting?
3. Why is he insisting? What are his reasons? Can he or she prove that such actions will not in any way contradict what God wants from us? Of course, it would be a contradiction!
I will stop here this morning! See you tomorrow for more.
CONFESSION FOR THE DAY I will not compromise!
PRAYER FOR THE DAY
Lord, help me to stand strong in the face of temptation
THOUGHT FOR THE DAY 1Co 6:18 (AMPC) Shun immorality and all sexual looseness [flee from impurity in thought, word, or deed]. Any other sin which a man commits is one outside the body, but he who commits sexual immorality sins against his own body.
ACTION PLAN FOR THE DAY Refuse to yield to any ongoing pressures
3 Important Things In Marriage. So we started this amazing topic yesterday. This is Part 2. For us to easily remember, the 3 important things that sustain us in marriage are in ‘P’.
Yesterday, we looked at the Peace of God, which is so important. As we journey in our marriage till life do us part, (which by the way is a long time)
God knows that life will happen on the way. So in His love and Mercy, He made His Peace available to us for the taking. 3 Important Things In Marriage
The second thing we will be looking at is:
2. Discovery of your Person
God is the source of every life because He breadth the breadth of life into Adam, and we all became a living soul.
This life became regenerated when we received Christ into our lives and became born again.
However, we all carry a piece of God. We are all masterpieces and are unique in our personalities. People are the same and no one is a waste or useless. The DNA of God in us.
Let’s look at Colossians 3 verse 3 in different translations.
Col 3:3 (TPT) Your crucifixion with Christ has severed the tie to this life, and now your true life is hidden away in God in Christ
Col 3:3 MSG Your old life is dead. Your new life, which is your real life—even though invisible to spectators—is with Christ in God. He is your life. When Christ (your real life, remember) shows up again on this earth, you’ll show up, too—the real you, the glorious you. Meanwhile, be content with obscurity, like Christ.
Col 3:3 AMPC For [as far as this world is concerned] you have died, and your [new, real] life is hidden with Christ in God.
We know from this scripture in different translations, that we have a new, real life that is hidden in Christ.
This hidden life is the real you. You have to discover that real you, if not you will never be fulfilled in life and of course in marriage.
You are not what people are calling you. You are not what your spouse is calling you. You are not what your present situation is calling you. It’s not new, people will call you based on what they can see.
They don’t know you, they didn’t create you so they should never call you, or better still you should not answer what others call you (if it is not in line with the Word of God)
Lazy wife, good for nothing husband, stubborn wife, barren wife, depressive wife, harsh husband, liar, cheat, useless and the list goes on. Even in bible days, people called blind Bartimeous, Rahab the harlot, and even Jesus of Nazareth.
Like Jesus, we have to know who we really are. Only then can we fulfill our marriage mandate. Marriage is an assignment. It takes you to discover who you are to be able to function well.
It takes a wife who has discovered herself and a husband who has discovered himself to be one. Unity in marriage is impossible without a discovery of oneself.
This discovery is a personal journey you have to embark on. It is also a spiritual journey because it takes you going back to God in sincere prayers and studying the Word.
The more you know Christ, the more you discover yourself because your real life is hidden in Christ.
May we discover ourselves in Jesus’ name.
God bless your marriage. This is the second of 3 Important Things In Marriage
CONFESSION FOR THE DAY My new real life is hid in Christ. My life is hid not from me but for me to discover.
PRAYERS FOR THE DAY Lord, cause the eyes of my understanding to be flooded with light, that I may discover myself in Jesus name
THOUGHT FOR THE DAY Col 3:3 AMP For you died [to this world], and your [new, real] life is hidden with Christ in God.
ACTION PLAN FOR THE DAY Go on a personal journey to discover yourself
