Men Need Respect and Women Need Romance. Men and women are created differently, they function differently and they see things differently. There are three major ways they are different.
Men and women are different in their personalities, their backgrounds, and their gender.
If we understand these differences, we will be able to relate to ourselves better. Meeting each other’s needs and prioritizing pleasing our spouse should be a big deal.
The number one cause of divorce is irreconcilable differences. The opposite will usually attract initially, if not managed well, these qualities that attract us to one another repel us and become a major source of conflict.
Men and women are made from different materials, so even in creation, they are different. Men were made out of dust but women were from one of the most sophisticated materials, the rib bone.
Respect for men is not just a cultural need but a scriptural need.
Ephesians 5:33, instructs women to respect their own husband. Men do things for honor, they are warriors and fighters by nature. So wives you have to be your husband’s number one cheerleader. Let nobody respect your husband more than you.
Affairs naturally develop in a boss-subordinate relationship, like a boss and secretary relationship because there is a natural flow of respect. Men Need Respect, Women Need Romance
Wives, don’t respect your boss, MD, pastor, or any other man more than your husband. You see his weaknesses, so the temptation to not respect him is there because women like to give respect when men do good things. Don’t yield to that temptation.
Understand your husband needs his space and some quiet when he is stressed. That is respect to him. Find new ways of respecting him by asking him, how you can appreciate him more.
Men, it is a crime to marry a woman and don’t give her what she needs most. Women need and love romance. Men don’t understand romance because naturally, they are rugged.
Romance is spelled tenderness. It is doing the normal things with a special touch and effect. Being thoughtful in the little things you do. Giving the little things the extra touch. For example don’t just buy your wife a gift, find out her preference. Take time to find out how she likes the gift. Women enjoy the process, so wrap the gift with a beautiful wrapper and present it in a romantic way. Romance doesn’t have to cost you an arm nor do you have to break the bank. It is romantic to just stay with her while cooking and just be with her.
You can just listen to her, give her a reassuring hug and tell her you understand her.
A woman talks for companionship because she is emotional. She tells you things not for you to correct, judge, apportion, blame, or criticize, she tells you, to empathize with her. This is being romantic.
Invest time, energy, effort, and money to meet your wife’s need for romance and you will harvest a happy, loving wife.
Men Need Respect, and Women Need Romance. Your marriage will thrive!
CONFESSION FOR THE DAY I dwell with my wife based on knowledge of that she is different from me. I respect my husband
PRAYERS FOR THE DAY Father help me to realize that men and women are different. Grant me wisdom in Jesus name
THOUGHT FOR THE DAY Eph 5:33.….husbands love your wives, wives respect your husbands
ACTION PLAN FOR THE DAY Husbands be romantic to your wives. Wives respect your husband’s.
This morning, we will be looking at the Ten Commandments For Lovers Part 2
3. Thou shalt not take the name of the LORD thy God in vain;
This is the third of ten commandments for lovers. They say you don’t know the value of something until you lose it. It doesn’t have to be your experience. Don’t take your partner’s love and commitment to the relationship for granted. Don’t be so used to each other that you expect nothing new anymore. If you are led to each other by God, then be committed to the relationship.
4. Remember the sabbath day, to keep it holy. To our brothers, remember her birthday to keep it holy. Ladies have a thing with dates. Significant dates like anniversaries, birthdays, the day she said yes etc may mean nothing to you but means a lot to her. If you need to set a reminder, please do.
Make such days memorable and use them as an opportunity to be good to the one you profess to love.
5. Honour thy father and thy mother Don’t fall in love and then disregard your parents. Respect her parents the same way you respect yours. Carry your pastors along; they are your spiritual parents. Give to your parents, pastors and mentors of your substance, that’s part of honour.
Ensure you have a mentor over your relationship. Good mentors save your from tormentors of life.
6. Thou shalt not kill. Don’t kill your relationship. Don’t always shut her up. Don’t ask her for sex. Don’t pressurize him to fix a wedding date. Don’t stop communicating. Now that she has said yes, don’t stop wooing her. Don’t dress provocatively when paying him a visit. You will kill him before you know it.
Do not sow wrong seeds into your relationship, because you always reap what you sow. Here is The Ten Commandments For Lovers Part 2. Tomorrow, we will look at Part 3
CONFESSION FOR THE DAY I will not be careless with my relationship with God
PRAYER FOR THE DAY Lord, uphold me to seek you always
THOUGHT FOR THE DAY Isa 45:19 (KJV) I have not spoken in secret, in a dark place of the earth: I said not unto the seed of Jacob, Seek ye me in vain: I the LORD speak righteousness, I declare things that are right.
ACTION PLAN FOR THE DAY Have a heart to heart discussion with your lover concerning serving God
Men Need Acceptance While Women Need Attention. Nobody enters marriage with the intention of divorcing, but along the line, there is a disconnection and couples have crises.
Men and women are different species if I can use that term. That’s why it becomes absolutely necessary for them to study and learn about each other’s world.
God has put so much investment into marriage. The first institution that God created was marriage. He made Adam a husband and a father. Marriage was the first institution before any other institution
We have successful lawyers, businessmen, and doctors, who have spent years before becoming what they are while not succeeding in their marriage because they failed to learn about marriage.
Men’s number one need is Acceptance. Women, never confront your husband. Men are warriors and fighters by nature. If you confront him, he will resist you, instinctively because the warrior in him will rise up.
When you accept him, he knows you are for him. You are an ally, not an enemy.
Women, when you want to get your husband to change don’t confront him. The direct correction will not work. He is not your child which you correct. You are to love your husband and you are to correct your children.
The rule is to accept your man, don’t confront him.
For example, if your husband dresses roughly, don’t tell him he dresses roughly and he needs to change. Tell him he is a very handsome guy and that he will even look better when he wears complimentary colours and dress sharp. He gets the message or better still, find a time he is more relaxed and tell him he looks finer with colours that match.
Women like to fix things, please don’t try to fix your man. Accept and celebrate him. Men Need Acceptance While Women Need Attention
On the other hand, women need attention. Your wife needs attention. Everything she does, the hair she makes, the cloth she wears, everything is to get your attention. Notice her, verbalize the fact that you notice her. Don’t ignore your wife. Be the first to notice what she’s wearing and comment. Notice when she makes a new hairstyle and make comments.
Tell her she is beautiful and gorgeous. Be tender towards her like you will do to a baby. Shower her with attention, don’t neglect her for another lady. It’s a No, No. Don’t show another female more attention than you show your wife, under any circumstances.
Couples, learn this about each other and make necessary adjustments.
Your marriage will thrive. Men Need Acceptance While Women Need Attention
CONFESSION FOR THE DAY I accept my husband. I give my undivided attention to my wife
PRAYERS FOR THE DAY Father help me to realize that men and women are different. Grant me wisdom in Jesus name
THOUGHT FOR THE DAY Eph 5: 33.….husbands love your wives, wives respect your husbands
ACTION PLAN FOR THE DAY Be mindful of accepting your husband and giving attention to your wife
Understanding Timing In Marriage. I once listened to a message by Bishop T.D Jakes titled, “Timing Is Everything.”
Sometimes what makes one thing bad and the same thing good is just about timing. What makes words spoken to a loved one good, bad or hurting beyond how it is spoken, is timing.
As husbands and wives, we have to study and understand proper timing. A good and skillful wife understands and uses the concept of timing to her advantage.
Women have great power and influence because they were created by God to be needed by men. God made man in Genesis 2, after He had made animals, plants, sun, and moon, He said it is not good for man to be alone. I will make a helper meet for him.
Men are not good (according to God’s standards without their wives).
Women are not just gifted more than men and extremely sophisticated, they are very much needed by men. Their make determines their functionality. Every woman is made and created to nurture and carry babies. God trusted women with the next generation.
Women are so much valuable in men’s life.
They have to understand this and carry themselves with this mentality. Wives, you have to defend your value.
You have the responsibility of ensuring you are not devalued for any reason. The value you place on yourself will determine the value placed on you. Have you ever seen a buyer paying more than the value placed on the commodity? Never, the buyer pays the value placed on the commodity.
The wife’s power of influence works better when the right timing is put into consideration.
The concept of right timing when put to use by the couple makes to things work better in the marriage.
Eccl 3:1 There’s an opportune time to do things, a right time for everything on the earth:
A right time for birth and another for death, A right time to plant and another to reap, A right time to kill and another to heal, A right time to destroy and another to construct, A right time to cry and another to laugh,
Understanding Timing In Marriage is crucial for knowing the right time to doing things as couples.
It becomes the wrong timing for the wife to make her grievances known to her husband when he is already feeling down. Men are territorial beings and will like to be in charge and in control. So telling your husband, you are not happy about something automatically puts his defence up.
Husbands, it becomes wrong timing for you not to consider the fact that your wife is an emotional being and sermonize her over a mistake she is already sorry about.
As couples let us be mindful of the things we do or don’t do considering whether it’s the right timing or not.
Our marriage will thrive!
CONFESSION FOR THE DAY I have understanding of the right time and seasons in my marriage
PRAYERS FOR THE DAY Father give me wisdom to consider the right timing before acting in Jesus name
THOUGHT FOR THE DAY Eccl 3:1 There’s an opportune time to do things, a right time for everything on the earth:
ACTION PLAN FOR THE DAY Consider the timing before acting. You don’t act out your feelings everytime
The Ten Commandments For Lovers. If the 10 commandments were written in the contemporary world, specifically for lovers, what would they look like? Let’s delve into it this morning!
The is not an attempt to change the ten commandments, no those are sacrosanct. This is just a creative way to apply them to our love life and creatively learn from them.
1. Thou shalt have no other gods before me. This is the first of the ten commandments for lovers. This means you should not double-date. Don’t add another bone to the bone God has given you. Set your face like a flint and concentrate on your partner. One god is good enough in God’s injunctions. Even the traditionalist are focused.
One guy in Abuja and another in Lagos while going out with both is not God’s idea. One babe in Canada and the other in Nigeria, while professing love to both at the same time is never the style of the kingdom.
One young man to supply gadgets and an elderly rich man to supply cash is trying to eat your cake and have it. These actions are strange to the kingdom!
2. Thou shalt not make unto thee any graven image This is the second of the ten commandments for lovers. This means don’t idolize anything, including your relationship. Not your family, not your career, not your friends. Your walk with God should not suffer because you fell in love. Your lover should not become a graven image to replace God.
In your attempt to do that, you may end up losing that lover. God is to be worshipped, your lover is to be loved, don’t get it twisted. Your lover is never to be worshipped. Your lover cannot be your god.
You fell in love and you stopped reading your Bible? It’s not a good idea. Thinking all day about your lover has replaced meditation in God’s word. Not cool at all.
You used to send scriptures that bless you to friends, now you are sending pictures; nude pictures to your lover! That contravenes the kingdom lifestyle!
I will stop here this morning. To be continued tomorrow.
CONFESSION FOR THE DAY I am focused on my relationship.
PRAYER FOR THE DAY Lord, help me to focus on my partner.
THOUGHT FOR THE DAY Isaiah 50:7 (KJV) For the Lord GOD will help me; therefore shall I not be confounded: therefore have I set my face like a flint, and I know that I shall not be ashamed.
ACTION PLAN FOR THE DAY Write out all the good things in your partner.
