Marriage is one institution you will never stop improving. No matter how old you are, you never grow too old of getting better at your marriage.
In fact, it is said that like wine, it gets better and sweeter the older it gets. I think it is true. The marriage goes through different stages and like a child you have to be patient with your marriage.
It requires a lot of work, a lot of sowing into the marriage. The formative years of the marriage are the most critical of all. Those years in a marriage which comes with so much labor and hard work.
Those years, you are still trying to understand yourselves; where the differences in temperaments and the male/female differences had to be mastered, where your spouse’s weaknesses really show, where you get pissed up by your spouse’s weaknesses, and where his strength can put you off, rather than celebrate his strength.
You may be at this critical stage in your marriage. I want to encourage you to hold on and be patient.
What God has joined together, let no man put asunder, is what the bible says. Make sure no matter what, you keep on improving on your marriage.
Never grow weary of improving on your marriage. Never grow weary of doing those things you know will improve your marriage. Don’t stop talking. Don’t stop being loving. Don’t stop being tender and kind.
Don’t stop helping your wife achieve her dreams. Don’t stop meeting her needs. Never stop treating her in a special way.
Never stop being a helper. Help him fulfill his dreams. Be romantic. Make him feel like a king. Don’t stop praying. Never stop talking to God about your marriage.
Your marriage is yours to bring the best out of it. It is yours to work out until the beauty therein appears.
God is waiting on you. Heaven believes in you to make it work. So make it work.
God bless your marriage.
CONFESSION FOR THE DAY I love my spouse
PRAYER FOR THE DAY Lord, help me to improve on my marriage
THOUGHT FOR THE DAY Php 2:13 (KJV) For it is God which worketh in you both to will and to do of his good pleasure.
This is not an absolute and ‘one answer fits all’ situation approach. There is always an exception to the rule. That is why the best thing that can happen to any married couple is to be filled with the Holy Spirit, to be a child of God, and to walk with God and know His voice.
It is a privilege to have access to the wisdom of God and He can always tell you what to do in your own peculiar circumstances.
I have witnessed the Holy Spirit help me through certain difficult times in my marriage and I am so grateful for those times.
We are talking about husbands and I believe by God’s Grace, I will also write about the wives.
We have four basic temperaments and other temperament blends. We also have modifications of our temperaments based on different factors such as our background, the environment we were raised in, our parents, their beliefs, exposure, the schools we attended, our religious beliefs, circumstances surrounding our childhood, childhood experiences, etc.
Now, you have to understand who you have married. Without understanding, you cannot be an effective helpmeet, and then it’s impossible for you to submit.
These are some qualities of a choleric husband and how to live with him based on knowledge.
1. A choleric is goal-oriented
That means he lives for achievement. He must achieve something. It is not impossible he cancels luxury at home just to cater for his goals.
Join him in whatever he wants to achieve and support him all the way. Encourage him. Don’t fight him or his goals. A choleric fight to finish and makes it a goal to accomplish.
2. A choleric is an obstacle crusher
A choleric crushes whatever is on his way to achieving that goal. Join him don’t criticize him.
3. A choleric is sharped tongued
It is not impossible he is seen verbally abusing his wife and lashing at her. Gently correct him when the event has passed.
4. He is egocentric
Don’t touch the ego. Help massage it especially in the way you talk. Talk to him in a soft tone and he will listen.
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5. A choleric maybe inconsiderate and selfish or self-centered
Whenever he is like this, point his attention to what he is doing.
6. He may defer helping
He may not help out in his wife’s project if it is not his project
Make sure you are not offended. Stand your ground but please be open.
7. A choleric husband makes coarse jokes or comments.
Guide against being offended. Be mature and don’t let his sarcasm get at you. Bear your mind out not in a fight but in honest conversation, maybe later, so that he won’t see you as contesting his ‘simple’ joke.
8. He wants to be in control and he is authoritative
See the good part of this. See it as being a strong leader and celebrate that he is being a man.
Don’t become a jelly under his authority. Enjoy him leading you. You don’t want to be in a position where the wife takes decisions.
There are more, but basically, you handle being married to a choleric husband not by being hurt, in strife, contention, or bitterness, you handle this by being honest and sincere with the way you feel.
God bless our marriages.
CONFESSION FOR THE DAY I am supportive of my husband in all areas.
PRAYER FOR THE DAY Lord, teach me to be supportive of my husband in Jesus’ name.
THOUGHT FOR THE DAY I exhort therefore, that, first of all, supplications, prayers, intercessions, and giving of thanks, be made for all men; 1Ti 2:1
ACTION PLAN FOR THE DAY Begin to look at areas you can give your support and begin to give it.
