Well, you can know. It is so easy to know but we often close our eyes to the obvious signs. I am going to use myself as an example.
Ours is a typical campus lovebirds story. There are ways I felt and there are things I did.
While these may not be specific things he must do as well, they are just to guide you in actually knowing whether the love is genuine.
1. I wanted to be with her always
More than anything, I wanted to be around her.
Something is not in place when he is not bothered about not seeing you in months.
A lady once told me she is preparing for marriage and yet the husband-to-be had not seen her in two years despite that they were just a few kilometers apart. Well, it turned out that he eventually left her for another person.
2. I felt like I was her protector
We all know God is her protector, but I had that feeling I was responsible for her.
This feeling engendered compassion which in turn informed my actions towards her.
If you have been slapped, be careful. If you have been forcefully violated be careful.
If you have been left in the cold because he was angry not minding your safety, be careful. If you have been massively embarrassed and shouted at in front of friends and families, be careful.
3. I wanted her to be happy
I couldn’t bear the sight of her being moody or downcast.
I would always try to make her laugh, quote scriptures to her about the joy of the Lord and all that.
If he doesn’t care about you being sad and depressed for days as a result of his actions, be careful. Things are not likely to change after the wedding.
If he seems to enjoy you being down and sad, something is wrong somewhere.
If he doesn’t care about you being pregnant again despite the trauma of the abortion you went through, you need to speak to your legs. Abortion is murder, it should not be trivialized.
By the time you have aborted twice, you really need to review your life and get out of that abusive relationship that will lead nowhere.
CONFESSION FOR THE DAY I make the right choice in God.
PRAYER FOR THE DAY Lord, open my eyes to see what I cannot see.
THOUGHT FOR THE DAY 1 Corinthians 13:4 Charity suffereth long, and is kind; charity envieth not; charity vaunteth not itself, is not puffed up,
This is a very relevant topic to all people who are married. We all belong to one of these groups in our marriage.
a. Your intimacy is good and needs little improvement
b. Your intimacy is just there and you want a fast revival
c. Your intimacy is bad and you are close to compromising
d. You are enjoying your intimacy
e. Your intimate life is very dry and boring and you are bothered
f. Your intimacy is not good and you don’t care.
g. Your intimate life is bad and you are settling yourself outside.
Did you miss out on yesterday’s devotional, we’ve got you covered kindly go HERE. For KHC video Devotionals kindly go HERE
Every couple must fall under one of these seven categories. Five of these categories are very bad and need urgent attention.
You must keep the flames in the bedroom red hot. The health of a marriage is largely dependent on the health of the bedroom.
Wives, don’t use love-making as a reward system for your husband, whereby when he is good and you are happy with him, you give him your body. You are not a prostitute who gives sex for reward.
Deal with every issue before they are allowed to cripple your love life.
Intimacy is first of the heart before it becomes of the body. All inhibitions must be taken off your marriage until you both become naked and not ashamed.
Close all doors to the enemy and swallow your pride. You cannot be full of yourself and expect things to work out. Some wives issue out commands to their husbands just so that they can make love to them. They become lord of the rings.
Don’t leave your matrimonial bed. Don’t sleep in different rooms, it will not work. Pray for whatever flaws he/ she has. Don’t judge or criticize your spouse to the point of rejecting them.
Whatever the issue, you are married. Save your marriage before it is too late. Forgive yourselves and embrace each other. Your marriage can still work out beautifully well.
God bless your marriage!
CONFESSION FOR THE DAY I will enjoy my marriage.
PRAYER FOR THE DAY Lord, help me to satisfy my spouse at all times.
THOUGHT FOR THE DAY 1 Corinthians 13:4 Charity suffereth long, and is kind; charity envieth not; charity vaunteth not itself, is not puffed up,
ACTION PLAN FOR THE DAY Take your spouse to “Jerusalem”
Don’t let his shiny lamp, his fine car, and his iPhone without God deceive you. Those things bring temporary happiness that will fizzle out.
Real joy, constant victory only comes from God-ordained relationships and marriages who are constantly living by the word and the Spirit.
If he has no oil, he would think the lamp is the problem, and he would go and get more lamps, he would dabble into adultery!
They that were foolish took their lamps, and took no oil with them: [4] But the wise took oil in their vessels with their lamps.
Mat 25:3-4 (KJV)
Nothing is more excruciating to be married to a wicked spouse, cheating on you, lying, deceiving, full of frowardness, and never giving you peace of mind.
Nothing is more debilitating to be married to a strange woman, a knife instead of a wife, bringing daily hell instead of daily help!
Nothing is more fulfilling to be married to a man or woman who is faithful to God, and has no capacity for evil through cheating, lying, playing religion, brandishing lamps without oil.
Where is your oil? Where is your depth? Where is your fear for God? Where is your integrity? Do you pay tithe? Do you honour God? Then you can ask me out and only then will my heart fall for you!
I challenge you to look beyond the lamp and go for the oil, the oil will lubricate your destiny and prevent your marital engine from knocking!
I pray for you this day, with every fibre of my being and with the strength of my call, you will not miss it!
Can you pray in the Spirit a little?
I commit you into the hands of the one that will exalt your horns like the horn of a unicorn and who will anoint your head with fresh oil.
Every form of confusion is removed from your life in Jesus name!
You will not collide with losers. You will not be entangled with foolishness. God will go ahead of you and make the crooked places straight. Affliction will not have intercourse with you! Delay is removed from your race! Heaven will announce you!
Be blessed today!
CONFESSION FOR THE DAY I make the right choice in God.
PRAYER FOR THE DAY Lord, help me to choose wisely.
THOUGHT FOR THE DAY Isaiah 30:21 And thine ears shall hear a word behind thee, saying, This is the way, walk ye in it, when ye turn to the right hand, and when ye turn to the left.
Every marriage that seeks to fulfill the mandate of Heaven must seek to do these 3 things.
Every marriage, especially the ones ordained from heaven has a mandate to fulfill. This mandate requires a lot of focus and hard work. A lot of things will be screaming at you to give up pursuing your mandate.
Joyce Meyer said in one of her videos that thank God Dave never gave up on her too quickly. Was Dave frustrated? Yes. Did it seem like it was not worth it? Yes. What if Dave and Joyce had given up on themselves and their marriage? Saying the road was too though? Thank God they made it and are fulfilling the mandate upon their marriage.
Let’s go through these three important things needed in every marriage.
1. Accept your spouse.
In accepting your spouse you accept everything about them, their weaknesses, strengths, challenges, background, past, present future, their body makeup, etc. It is a full acceptance. Once you are married, you are into that person fully.
Someone said, my husband talks a lot, he snores, he is slow… oh good. It’s a whole package.
2. Believe in your spouse. You not only accept your spouse but you also need to believe in them. Believe they can get better. Believe they can change. Believe their weaknesses can become their greatest source of strength. Believe there are some ‘good’ in them. Believe God’s Mercy will find you and your marriage will work out.
Did you miss out on yesterday’s devotional, we’ve got you covered kindly go HERE. For KHC video Devotionals kindly go HERE
3. Confess your love for your spouse. This is so powerful because our confessions are so powerful. If you make it a habit to confess and declare those things you want to see in your spouse and in your relationship. The more you confess your love for your spouse the more your love for him/ her grows. Don’t confess what you don’t want to see or experience in your marriage. Continually fill your mouth with positive things concerning your spouse and your marriage.
God bless our marriage
CONFESSION FOR THE DAY My marriage will fulfill God’s Mandate on it.
PRAYER FOR THE DAY Lord, help to focus on my spouse
THOUGHT FOR THE DAY Mat 12:34 O generation of vipers, how can ye, being evil, speak good things? for out of the abundance of the heart the mouth speaketh.
ACTION PLAN FOR THE DAY I begin to put to practice what I have learned
What kind of lover should you not marry? Follow me this morning.
They that were foolish took their lamps, and took no oil with them: But the wise took oil in their vessels with their lamps.
Mat 25:3-4 (KJV)
The lamp represents the pulchritude, it is that which is seen, it is that which attracts.
It is often polished and shiny. With all the hips, tips and lips in place.
But not all have oil in their vessel. Their lamp is only burning for a while.
Before you choose, check beyond the lamp, and be sure he has oil in his vessel.
A lamp without extra oil is an empty facade. The shame will soon be obvious to all.
Does he have the fear of God? Is she filled with the Holy Ghost?
Don’t go for phonetics alone, be sure he or she can speak in tongues. Demons have no respect for phonetics.
Afflictions of life engendered by wicked spirits can snuff out the light of the lamp quickly.
Without an extra oil, the lamp is useless, a fake life, devoid of life and substance, a shame in waiting, a disaster on queue!
I challenge you not to fall in love with foolishness.
The lyrics of Beyonce or the tune of Fela will not bail you out in the days of trouble. What is a professed child of God doing with curse-filled lyrics and music?
Invariably, you are what you listen to! You will need the word of the living God.
Plastic Christianity without a depth will lead to frustration. Religion without a deliberate relationship with God will embarrass you soonest.
Are you getting married to his bank account or the true riches of the kingdom? Money is different from wealth. There are billionaires who are bound by the spirit of poverty!
If you have no oil in your vessel, don’t ask me out!
To be concluded tomorrow.
CONFESSION FOR THE DAY I make the right choice in God.
PRAYER FOR THE DAY Lord, help me to choose wisely.
THOUGHT FOR THE DAY Isaiah 30:21 And thine ears shall hear a word behind thee, saying, This is the way, walk ye in it, when ye turn to the right hand, and when ye turn to the left.
