Husbands, are you hurting your wife? Do you care for her emotional well-being? Or are you just focusing on what gives you fulfillment which is your job?
Do you leave your wife lonely, vulnerable and unhappy? Are you really concerned about her as a person or you just want her to be well behaved so you can have some peace and concentrate more on your job?
Do you really love her, cherish, appreciate adore and affirm your wife or you are too busy for that? Do you understand her inner struggles, unfulfilled aspirations, dreams and depression triggers?
Are you secretly cheating on her thinking that nobody will discover? Do you know that the scripture says one day will come when your sin will find you out? Even if you run to UK or USA, the ‘sin’ will collect visa too and will appear like James Bond!
Remember God has a marking scheme, and the marking scheme says, ‘Husbands, love your wife.’
Wives, are you submitted to your husband’s desires? Do you respect him even when his decisions seem hard to follow? Do you go your own way while you leave him to go his own ways? Do you spend ‘your own’ money the way you want without having the attitude that it is ‘our money?’
Are you really a loving couple or strange bed fellows? Do you seek to appreciate him? Do you make yourself available as a suitable help, adaptable to him or you are busy and consumed with just your own self?
Are you selfishly drawing or demanding attention for self without being selfless? Do you realize deep down in your mind that you can deceive somebody for a long time, but you cannot fool God for a second? That is why the scripture says God is not mocked!
Remember that if you fail in your marital assignment, you have failed in a major area of your life and destiny. But when we do fail, His mercy covers for us and he helps us in our weaknesses. He turns our failures into glory.
Thank God for grace, because God is a God of second chance. While grace is not a license for habitual sins, grace will embrace you if you make a mistake. He teaches and trains us while on the assignment. He gives us several tutorials and allows the Holy Spirit to show us some of the questions in the examination. He allows the Holy Spirit to enter the examination hall with us and help us out! What a God!
If you find yourself floundering in any areas, you have a father who will always embrace you and help you. Turn to Him and talk to Him. He has listening ears and He will not condemn you. He will rather embrace you in His everlasting and loving arms and turn your life and home around.
I pray that God will give you more wisdom in Jesus name.
CONFESSION FOR THE DAY I will make a success of my marital assignment. I will love my wife. I will be submissive to my husband.
PRAYERS FOR THE DAY Let every crisis area in my marital assignment receive healing in Jesus name.
THOUGHT FOR THE DAY Eph 5:33 (AMP) However, let each man of you [without exception] love his wife as [being in a sense] his very own self; and let the wife see that she respects and reverences her husband [that she notices him, regards him, honors him, prefers him, venerates, and esteems him; and that she defers to him, praises him, and loves and admires him exceedingly]. [I Pet. 3:2.]
ACTION PLAN FOR THE DAY Ask your wife how you can love her better. Ask your husband in what ways you can be the wife of his dreams.
I am very persuaded that when you are not living right and following God’s principles, there are a lot of things you are missing and then you make yourself vulnerable to the antics of the devil.
I can prove this to you from the scriptures and from several experiences my ears have scraped from phone calls from every continent on this earth! It is the same everywhere, tales of regrets the moment compromise has been entertained.
You see, the devil knows you are a child of God. He knows you want to make heaven. He cannot access your life until you allow him. You allow him the moment you buy into his suggestions, temptations and traps.
He sets specific traps that are unique to your weakness. And this is what you must realize! Before someone starts winking at you for extra-marital affair, the devil ensures you have been fighting your spouse thereby making you vulnerable!
Everything that happens is of spiritual significance! Nothing just happens! Before you take that action, ask yourself, is this moving me towards God or away from God? There is no middle ground!
But it also applies to you: every husband must love his wife as himself, and every wife must respect her husband. –Ephesians 5:33 (GNB)
When you were single, you were at the preparation stage, but now that you are married, you are at the performance stage of your married life. You are at the center stage and heaven’s spotlight is on you.
Your performance in marriage will either allow you to be marked right or wrong. God gave you the marital assignment and He is going to mark your script.
Dear husband and wife, it is not what you feel or think is right that you do that will earn you a pass mark in your marital assignment but what God requires according to His marking scheme (the Bible).
To be continued…
CONFESSION FOR THE DAY I will make a success of my marital assignment. I will love my wife. I will be submissive to my husband.
PRAYERS FOR THE DAY Let every crisis area in my marital assignment receive healing in Jesus name.
THOUGHT FOR THE DAY However, let each man of you [without exception] love his wife as [being in a sense] his very own self; and let the wife see that she respects and reverences her husband [that she notices him, regards him, honors him, prefers him, venerates, and esteems him; and that she defers to him, praises him, and loves and admires him exceedingly]. –Ephesians 5:33 (AMP)
ACTION PLAN FOR THE DAY Ask your wife how you can love her better. Ask your husband in what ways you can be the wife of his dreams.
Still reading from our anchor scripture Genesis 38:16, 18
…And Judah turned unto her by the way and said, go to, I pray you, let me come in unto you: And she said what will you GIVE me, that you may come in unto me? And he said what pledge shall I give you? And she said, your SIGNET, and your BRACELETS and your STAFF that is in your hand. And he gave it her, and came in unto her, and she conceived by him. –Genesis 38:16, 18 (KJV)
SIGNET is ‘chotham chotham’ in Hebrew language and it simply means a seal or a signature ring, it represents authority. It also implies, ‘finality’.
You rule in this world with authority. When Jesus was leaving his disciples, he gave them authority. It is the mark of your reign on earth; it is the proof of your royalty. And yes, that is what you let go when you desecrate yourself with what would have been rightfully yours in marriage!
BRACELET is ‘pathiyl’ and simply means twine or lace. It represents the dignity and the glory of God in your life. It is a mark of favour that makes you outstanding and beautiful in this sinfully ugly world.
STAFF is ‘matteh mattah’ which figuratively means a tribe, a rod, whether for chastising, ruling as in a scepter, and also means a support of life as in bread!
No wonder the devil plays the card of free and cheap compromise all over the place. No wonder he glamorizes and makes sin looks like the usual thing using the dual passage of technology and the media!
I have gone all the way to expatiate on this to let you see the implication of compromise. I want you to know that bed antics is spiritual and it does not end in the brothel or the hotel, it actually begins!
Would it be worth it to exchange the three most important things in your life for some few minutes of pleasure that will bring heartache and untold agony later?
Joseph would have lost the signet, bracelet and staff of a Prime Minister-ship in Egypt had he compromised with Mrs. Potiphar!
This message is not to condemn you! On the contrary, it is to call you to order. That is the anointing and unction on Kisses and Huggs Club and to the glory of God, thousands are being touched and affected from every continent on this planet!
It is your turn to drink from this grace! It is your turn to turn around!
I want you to run to God this morning. If you feel your signet, bracelet and staff are all gone and lost, God can restore! All He wants is your genuine turn around! It is as simple as that.
Ask God to give you a new beginning and He will! His love is ever available for you, and all you need to do is to embrace that love! He will not only forgive you, He will also forget about it! Believe it!
Talk to him right now! If you are still struggling with guilt and you have nobody to pray with you, you could give a call.
I pray it will be a new day for you and that all you have lost will be restored in Jesus name as you call upon God now!
CONFESSION FOR THE DAY I have grace, wisdom and diligence to develop myself as I prepare for marriage.
PRAYERS FOR THE DAY Father in the name of Jesus, I resist every hindrance to my success in my assignment.
THOUGHT FOR THE DAY So Jotham became mighty, because he prepared his ways before the LORD his God. – 2Chronicles 27:6 (KJV)
ACTION PLAN FOR THE DAY Write out all your attitudes, positive and negative. Find ways to improve on your good attitudes and eliminate the bad ones.
…And Judah turned unto her by the way and said, go to, I pray you, let me come in unto you: And she said what will you GIVE me, that you may come in unto me? And he said what pledge shall I give you? And she said, your SIGNET, and your BRACELETS and your STAFF that is in your hand. And he gave it her, and came in unto her, and she conceived by him. –Genesis 38:16, 18 (KJV)
This scripture shows that Judah made a certain exchange to have sex with this woman. He exchanged his Signet, Bracelets, and staff.
Signet: which signifies your AUTHORITY
Bracelets: which is your BEAUTY
Your Staff: represent STABILITY
Many people do not realize that at every compromise there is always an exchange. There is a lot of significance to the things he exchanged; apparently, he didn’t see it that way. Just like most people do not consider the things they give out at every compromise, for every sexual escapade either as a man/woman, you lose something.
You lose those three things each time you compromise in adultery or any other form of sexual perversion.
Every time you had a quickie that is misplaced, every time you thought you were having fun, every time you thought you were cheating on your spouse, some part of you actually die.
Let’s look at some of those words:
What PLEDGE shall I give you..?
The Hebrew word is ‘Arabon’ taken from a root word that means ‘in the sense of exchange.’
So it was actually an exchange! It was a transaction.
I pray you will not exchange your destiny because of lust! Esau exchanged his destiny over a plate of porridge and the Bible says he sought for it with tears later. We are advised not to be a fornicator, and a profane person like Esau was.
To be continued…
CONFESSION FOR THE DAY I have grace, wisdom, and diligence to build my marriage.
PRAYERS FOR THE DAY Father in the name of Jesus, I resist every hindrance to my success in my assignment.
THOUGHT FOR THE DAY So Jotham became mighty because he prepared his ways before the LORD his God. -2Chronicles 27:6 (KJV)
ACTION PLAN FOR THE DAY Write out all your attitudes, positive and negative. Find ways to improve on your good attitudes and eliminate the bad ones.
Be committed to the things of God. Don’t be so busy with your career or family life that you abandon your purpose and the assignment for which God created you. Make sure you pursue your purpose because that is where true riches and fulfillment lie.
5. Love or lust?
Be selfless! That is how your marriage will last. Let the love of God propel you in all you do. Let the love of God be shed abroad in your heart. Love her truly. Respect him indeed. That is the blueprint that keeps divorce away!
Respect means a lot to a man while love means a lot to a woman. Rather than go back and forth on who is right or wrong, go ahead with agape love, unconditional love and you will keep your home together.
6. Space and Forgiveness
Forgive easily. It is the way to go if you want your marriage to last. Practice advance forgiveness. Never hold your spouse in bitterness. Men, be patient with your spouse and make sure you love her genuinely.
Women, do not close up your spirit against your husband to a point you now live like strangers in your matrimonial home. Those are dangerous precursors to divorce!
7. Mentors
Adulterous relationships and extra-marital relationships are rooted in secrecy. The moment you can hide something from your spouse, you have planted a seed for chaos. Be open with each other. It kills the power of infidelity.
Learn to have a joint mentor who you trust, whom you can report yourselves to that will help you sort out issues that are beyond you. Take issues as they come and don’t store up hurts.
God will help you and give you grace in Jesus name!
CONFESSION FOR THE DAY I will not be in haste concerning my relationships. I will be led by God’s Spirit.
PRAYERS FOR THE DAY Lord, guide my steps so that I will not start wrong relationships in Jesus name.
THOUGHT FOR THE DAY Pro 2:10-12 KJV When wisdom entereth into thine heart, and knowledge is pleasant unto thy soul; Discretion shall preserve thee, understanding shall keep thee: To deliver thee from the way of the evil man, from the man that speaketh froward things;
ACTION PLAN FOR THE DAY Make a list of the qualities you want in a man and use it to pray.
