Marriage Goals: Why Counselors and Mentors Are the Ultimate Relationship Hack

Reading Time: 2 minutes

So, you’re married or planning marriage, and everyone keeps talking about how it’s the “best adventure” and also “hard work.” Spoiler alert: they’re right. But here’s the good news—like any epic quest, you don’t have to do it alone. Let’s talk about why having a counselor or mentor in your corner isn’t just a “nice-to-have” but a game-changer for your relationship.

Marriage Is a Journey, Not a Solo Mission

First off, can we just admit that marriage isn’t all highlight reels and couple selfies? Sure, there are cute date nights, but there are also moments when you’re wondering why they still don’t load the dishwasher right. (Just me?)

Here’s where counselors and mentors step in. Think of them as the GPS for your marriage road trip—guiding you around potholes, dead ends, and those “we’re lost but too stubborn to ask for help” moments.

Proverbs 11:14 says it best: “Where there is no guidance, a people falls, but in an abundance of counselors there is safety.” Translation? Wisdom from others = better chances of success.

Why Communication Is Harder Than It Looks

Raise your hand if you’ve ever had a disagreement over nothing that spiraled into a full-blown fight. 🙋‍♀️🙋‍♂️ Yup, same. A lot of it boils down to communication—or lack thereof.

Counselors are like communication ninjas. They teach you how to actually listen (not just wait for your turn to talk), say what you mean without a side of passive aggression, and handle conflict like grown-ups.

And mentors? They’ve been there. They know what it’s like to fight over finances, forget anniversaries, or navigate in-laws who “mean well.” Their advice isn’t coming from a textbook—it’s real talk, grounded in experience and grace.

The “Strong Foundation” Everyone Talks About

Let’s get real: building a strong marriage is more than just saying “I do.” It’s about figuring out how to keep choosing each other every day.

Mentors, especially those whose relationships you admire, can show you what that looks like IRL. They can share how they worked through the tough seasons—like raising kids, career struggles, or that time one of them accidentally booked the wrong flight for vacation (oops).

Meanwhile, counselors can help you unpack what’s going on under the surface. Are you carrying unresolved baggage? Struggling to align your priorities? They’ll guide you through the deep stuff so you’re not just putting Band-Aids on bigger issues.

But Do We Really Need Help?

Okay, maybe you’re thinking, “Can’t we just figure this out ourselves?” Sure, you could. But why would you? Even the best athletes have coaches, and marriage is way harder than learning to throw a touchdown pass.

Getting help doesn’t mean you’re failing. It means you’re serious about thriving. Plus, how cool is it to have someone in your corner cheering for your marriage to win?

A Few Final Thoughts (and a Pep Talk)

Look, no one walks into marriage with all the answers. It’s a journey of faith, growth, and a whole lot of grace. Ecclesiastes 4:9-10 says, “Two are better than one… For if they fall, one will lift up his fellow.” And sometimes, lifting each other up means calling in reinforcements.

Whether it’s learning how to communicate better, setting a solid foundation, or just having someone to remind you that you’re not alone, counselors and mentors are there to help. So don’t wait until things are falling apart—invest in your relationship now. Future you (and your spouse) will thank you.

You’ve got this. And with a little help? You’ll go from “just married” to “happily ever after.” 🖤