In marriage, our intentions don’t count as much as our actions. So verbalizing our affection to our spouse is very important. Learn To Verbalize Your Love To Your Spouse
It does something to the wife hearing from her husband that she is the best cook in the world. Honestly, she will want to live to the expectation of her husband and the name he has called her.
Of course, what is good for the goose is also good for the gander. Husbands also respond to words spoken to them by their wives. If you call your husband unromantic, you are right because the little ingenuity he has will be lost and he will be very unromantic. Call your husband romantic, and I believe he will go out of his way to see to it that he is more romantic. All in all, we all respond to words whether negatively or positively.
There is a king and a beast inside every husband. It is the one you call that will come forth. As wives, we should always try to call and address the one that makes you happier. Some wives address the beast and their husbands behave like one.
Also, inside every wife is wisdom, folly, a queen, virtues as well as a beast. Address the one you want. Not just occasional but learn to do it always. If you want the queen, then address her gently and with sweetness. You will see her behavior change.
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This is a principle in marriage that I believe God wants us to practice.
In Genesis, where the first marriage existed, we saw Adam using the same principle.
And Adam said, This is now bone of my bones, and flesh of my flesh: she shall be called Woman, because she was taken out of Man. Therefore shall a man leave his father and his mother, and shall cleave unto his wife: and they shall be one flesh.
Gen 2:23-24
In verse 23, God was the one that took a rib from Adam and made a woman, but it was Adam that spoke up and called the woman bone of my bone and flesh of my flesh.
He called her my intimate friend, the one that is like me, the one who meets all my needs perfectly like no one else would. As a result of his confession, the cleaving process was now possible and then they could become one flesh.
The principle is very simple but it requires our commitment.
Say good things that you want to see and believe God has put inside your spouse and you will begin to see your spouse manifest such.
God bless your marriage.
CONFESSION FOR THE DAY I speak positive words to my spouse.
PRAYER FOR THE DAY God teach me how to love my spouse with all my heart
THOUGHT FOR THE DAY Gen 2:23 [TLB] “This is it!” Adam exclaimed. “She is part of my own bone and flesh! Her name is ‘woman’ because she was taken out of a man.”
The Bible says husbands enjoy the wife of their youth. This means enjoying yourself while you have strength as a young couple. Don’t be too serious at home and learn to live together as best friends. Don’t allow the pressure of finances, raising children, in-laws, and others to destabilize your togetherness.
Your spring water is for you and you only, not to be passed around among strangers. Bless your fresh-flowing fountain! Enjoy the wife you married as a young man! Lovely as an angel, beautiful as a rose — don’t ever quit taking delight in her body. Never take her love for granted! Why would you trade enduring intimacies for cheap thrills with a whore? for dalliance with a promiscuous stranger?
Prov 5:17-21 [MSG]
Between the two of you, one person will be more playful. Let the playful one take the initiative and the other follows suit.
The Holy Spirit knows what He’s saying when He says enjoy the wife of your youth. Be deliberate in making each other happy. Do not make others outside your home or marriage happy at the expense of your spouse.
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Read books together and discuss them. Invest in each other.
I pray your marriage will be beautiful and filled with new wine.
God bless your marriage
CONFESSION FOR THE DAY I love my spouse and we enjoy life together
PRAYER FOR THE DAY Lord help us to enjoy ourselves now
THOUGHT FOR THE DAY Ecc 9:9 Live joyfully with the wife whom thou lovest all the days of the life of thy vanity, which he hath given thee under the sun, all the days of thy vanity: for that is thy portion in this life, and in thy labour which thou takest under the sun.
The ability to enjoy whatever God has given to us despite imperfections is the maturity that takes for happiness in life and marriage. It is in loving our spouse unconditionally that makes marriage beautiful and fulfilling. We all have so many buts, we can choose to or choose not to consider in our spouse.
The Bible says love covers a multitude of sins. It means if we choose to walk in love, we can ignore or better still, hand our spouse’s flaws to God.
This prayer becomes handy; Lord give us the Grace to change the things we can change and the courage to leave the ones we cannot.
When we hand over such things to God, we should know that God is capable of handling them in His own way. Once in God’s hands, we should rest and trust in His love.
What most people do is that they give God and then collect it back. God knows what best to do to change a man. There is no overnight transformation. Even God appreciates the process of gradual change or transformation.
Do not conform yourselves to the standards of this world, but let God transform you inwardly by a complete change of your mind. Then you will be able to know the will of God—what is good and is pleasing to him and is perfect.
Rom 12:2 GNB
Am I asking us to keep quiet and suffer in silence? No. Neither am I justifying wrong behaviors or any character flaws or defects. Most of the character flaws we see in marriage were already there as singles. It only became amplified in marriage.
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An irresponsible man had always had those tendencies. It was only fully expressive in marriage.
If we will not focus on the temperamental differences of our spouse, we would have done well.
So far as what we complain about are our differences, fear not. God will always see us through. The opposite will always attract. You found yourself attracted to your spouse and eventually married him/her because he was different from you.
If you are a fast person, you will be attracted to a quiet, easy-going person. A serious person will marry a playful person. It is these same differences that later repels, annoys and, gets us aggravated.
Some couples say, I love my spouse but she talks too much, but she is lazy, but she is careless. I love my spouse but he is aggressive, but he works too much, we can’t even go for vacation….and on and on.
What we should do is appreciate and thank God for the difference. Know that God put the differences there so you can accomplish much in your marriage. Try and let love, understanding, and patience have their full course in your lives.
You have to understand that neither you nor your spouse is correct or wrong, it is just about being wired differently, having different opinions, and seeing things from different viewpoint and perspectives.
So if you are hoping and thinking, ‘I love my spouse, but…’, you have to begin to remove the ‘but’ from your marital dictionary and begin to love your spouse despite their faults. Learn to forgive and forgive fast. Never allow issues to linger for long before seeking to forgive. Don’t allow ego or pride to finish your marriage.
I know a couple whose marriage is fast heading for the rocks. The wife has chosen to believe she is right and is waiting for her husband to come rolling on the floor begging. The husband too is unwilling to bend, saying she is fond of doing that and that he is tired of begging.
The wife has refused to listen to counsel. It is their differences that the devil wants to use to scatter their marriage. We are to walk through our differences allowing God to mature us.
May God bless our marriage.
CONFESSION FOR THE DAY I love my spouse and my sin covers his/her flaws
PRAYER FOR THE DAY Lord, help me enjoy the wife of my youth
THOUGHT FOR THE DAY Rom 12:2 GNB Do not conform yourselves to the standards of this world, but let God transform you inwardly by a complete change of your mind. Then you will be able to know the will of God—what is good and is pleasing to him and is perfect.
ACTION PLAN FOR THE DAY Study your spouse and learn to accept your differences
One of the foundational ingredients of a successful marriage is being under authority. By authority, I mean good authority because it is possible for someone to be under a negative authority.
It is good when your spouse has someone or people (not too many) that he/she listens to. The importance of this cannot be overemphasized. You should at least have a spiritual authority figure that can speak into your lives as a couple.
When you have questions or you have hot arguments, there must be someone you can run to, someone who loves you enough to correct your wrong and give you the right direction.
This has been the undoing of so many marriages. They have decided to live like an island. There are no custom-made issues in marriage. The problems in marriage are common to all marriages. They may come in a different flavor but basically, they are the same things.
You take the pressure off your marriage when you have someone you can talk to and most importantly, LISTEN to.
The person has to be considered a mentor because he/ she is considered older, more experienced, and more spiritual.
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Your mentors may not be your parents because it has been discovered that parents could be sentimental in their judgments.
You don’t have to learn from experience. Learn by the wisdom of your mentors. There are a lot of things we assume we know, but we do not know as we ought to know.
So many marriages are achieving below their marital potential. They have denied themselves their great destiny potential because they feel they can handle stuff by themselves.
Even Jesus had to grow, had to be subject to his parents, had to be taught, and had teachers.
I remember an issue we had a while ago. It was so knotty, it was as if the devil was ready to throw in confusion and disagreement into our home. Thank God for our mentors, it was not so much of what was said, it was their intercession for us that solved the issue.
So don’t be afraid of sharing your problems. Some think they have not solved their own problems before they are solving other people’s problems. That’s being childish. Is like saying a doctor is not qualified to help the sick because he has malaria himself.
A doctor is graced and anointed with the wisdom and knowledge to help the sick. Of course, if he doesn’t apply the same principles he is giving to the sick to himself, he will be sick and have to use the same medicine he is prescribing to his patient.
God bless your marriage
CONFESSION FOR THE DAY I am humbled to listen to the counsel of my mentors.
PRAYER FOR THE DAY God give a listening ear and a receiving heart
THOUGHT FOR THE DAY Pro 24:6 For by wise counsel thou shalt make thy war: and in multitude of counsellors there is safety.
ACTION PLAN FOR THE DAY Register for KHC Camp meeting
We change so many things in life. We change our cloths, shoes, bags, makeup, etc.
We even change our friends, change our cars, change our jobs, change our houses, change our location, change our addresses etc.
The one most important thing we should change is our mind. Our minds are so important. It dictates and affects everything we do.
Inside our minds lies the seat of our emotions, intellect and will.
Our minds are responsible for our thinking which informs our feelings which eventually informs our actions.
That’s the Bible says as a man thinketh in his heart so he is. Pro 23:7
If you don’t gird the loins of your heart or mind as the bible advise in 1 Pet 1: 13, you will allow all manner of junks in your minds.
We cannot allow our minds to be a refuse dump for all manner of thoughts to just fly into.
Assumptions that are not true or are half true.
The devil puts strongholds in our minds to gain control over our minds and our final actions. He gains control over our lives this way. Like you gain control over a dog you put on a chain. You decide where it goes and where it doesn’t.
Strongholds are strong arguments with evidences to back them up. These strongholds are like walls in our minds.
Bible tells us what we should do to these strongholds. It tells us to constantly destroy strongholds.
For the weapons of our warfare are not physical [weapons of flesh and blood], but they are mighty before God for the overthrow and destruction of strongholds,
1 Cor 10:4-5 AMP
[Inasmuch as we] refute arguments and theories and reasonings and every proud and lofty thing that sets itself up against the [true] knowledge of God;
and we lead every thought and purpose away captive into the obedience of Christ (the Messiah, the Anointed One)
We destroy strongholds, refute arguments, and lead every thought captive to the obedience of what the bible says.
All these we do by taking charge of our minds and being in control.
As married couples, the devil seeks to throw husbands and wives apart. He seeks to gain control and dictates what we think which is usually wrong. He seeks to destroy the unity and harmony in our marriage.
We should refuse him by not cooperating with him. That’s why we have to change our minds.
In 2Tim 2:16, bible says we should shun profane and vain babblings for they will increase ungodliness.
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In our marriage, we are to shun vain babblings of the devil in our minds through friends, families, our feelings etc. We are to focus on building our marriage and building unity and harmony.
Shun every arguements that have strong evidences. The evidences are so strong you can almost vouch for them.
Anything that is from base on love or that is not based on what bibles we should think on, don’t entertain them in your thoughts against your spouse. Choose to follow the way of love.
For the rest, brethren, whatever is true, whatever is worthy of reverence and is honorable and seemly, whatever is just, whatever is pure, whatever is lovely and lovable, whatever is kind and winsome and gracious, if there is any virtue and excellence, if there is anything worthy of praise, think on and weigh and take account of these things [fix your minds on them].
Phil 4:8 AMP
I pray God will strengthen us to begin to break every negativity in our minds that is standing in our way of being united as couples in Jesus mighty name.
God bless your marriage.
CONFESSION FOR THE DAY I give priority to meditating on God’s word and so my mind is renewed and transformed.
PRAYER FOR THE DAY Lord, help me to always keep my mind on things that are true, pure, just, and gracious.
THOUGHT FOR THE DAY Philippians 4:18, AMP For the rest, brethren, whatever is true, whatever is worthy of reverence and is honorable and seemly, whatever is just, whatever is pure, whatever is lovely and lovable, whatever is kind and winsome and gracious, if there is any virtue and excellence, if there is anything worthy of praise, think on and weigh and take account of these things [fix your minds on them].
ACTION PLAN FOR THE DAY What are the wrong notions that you think you have about marriage. Go into God’s word to find out the truth about that situation
