When Expectations Clash

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When Expectations Clash

She thought marriage meant constant date nights. He thought marriage meant saving every penny to keep the home running and to give the children a good life.

He thought “quality time” meant watching TV together. She thought it meant long walks and deep talks.

Neither was absolutely wrong—but both were disappointed.

This is how expectations clash. And if unspoken, they lead to frustration.

Singles, while dating, don’t just ask, “What’s your favourite colour?” Ask, “What does love look like to you?” You might discover one of you defines romance as gifts, while the other defines it as service. This clarity will definitely save you from some conflict later. With this understanding, you can go into marriage knowing what and what you will do that will read L.O.V.E to your spouse.

Now, to couples, let’s stop assuming that our spouses should “just know.” No one is a mind reader. If you expect help with chores, say so. If you long for more affection, voice it. James 4:2 says, “You do not have because you do not ask God.” Ehm, the same principle applies in marriage—sometimes you don’t have because you didn’t ask your spouse. Now start asking.

Expectations aren’t the enemy—silence is. Talk. Listen. Adjust. That’s how two merge into one.

When Expectations Clash