Should I Marry for Love or Purpose?

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Marriage is an institution created by God for a purpose. It’s one of the most significant decisions you will ever make. This is a world where emotions run high and destiny calls, but many singles still find themselves asking if they should marry for love or purpose.

Genesis 2:18 (NIV) The Lord God said, “It is not good for the man to be alone. I will make a helper suitable for him.”

The scripture gave us a reason why it is not good for a man to be alone which is why it said He will make him a helper suitable for him. The gospel truth is that love and purpose work together and every destiny decision must have a strong WHY.

The first thing Adam saw in Eve was her beauty. He was blown away and immediately gave her the name WOMAN. When he was to name the animals that God created, God had to give the instructions, but when he saw his wife, his purpose to oversee, to be fruitful and to multiply began to flow effortlessly, which made him name Eve immediately. Even though he was asleep when she was created out of his ribs, he got her name at first sight and followed through with sweet lines.

Genesis 2:23 (NIV)The man said, This is now bone of my bones and flesh of my flesh, she shall be called ‘woman,’ for she was taken out of man.”

There has to be a complementation between you and your spouse that allows you to flow naturally in the fulfillment of your purpose with deep love.

So, leaving purpose out for love does not balance with the equation of God.

Here are reasons you should marry for love and purpose.

1. Love without purpose is risky

Love is a powerful force. It makes your heart race, gives you butterflies, and makes you believe in forever. But love alone is not enough to sustain a marriage. Feelings can be fleeting, and what happens when life gets hard? You will no longer feel the excitement you once had. When you make love a choice, your WHYs will reflect and you will be able to sustain better than relying on the feelings of love alone.

Proverbs 19:21 (NIV) “Many are the plans in a person’s heart, but it is the Lord’s purpose that prevails.”

Marriage without purpose is like a car without fuel. It may look good on the outside, but it won’t go far.  

2. Purpose without love is a struggle

On the other hand, marrying only for purpose, whether it’s for ministry, business, or societal expectations without genuine love can feel like a job instead of a joyful union. If you choose a partner just because they align with your calling but lack deep affection, your marriage may feel forced and duty-bound rather than fulfilling.  

Ecclesiastes 4:9-10 (NIV) “Two are better than one because they have a good return for their labor: If either of them falls down, one can help the other up.”

Purpose alone won’t carry you through the days when you need warmth, affection, and deep emotional connection.  

3. Balance love with purpose

The best marriages are those where love and purpose align. Love brings joy, intimacy, and companionship, while purpose gives direction, meaning, and a shared vision. God’s design for marriage is not just about romance or function, it’s about a divine partnership that glorifies Him.  

Before saying “I do,” ask yourself:  

● Does this person truly love me, not just in words but in action?  

● Do we share the same spiritual and life purpose?  

● Will our marriage honor God and advance His kingdom?  

God’s plan for marriage includes love, partnership, and purpose to work together. If you marry only for love, you may wake up one day wondering why you’re together. If you marry only for purpose, you might feel emotionally disconnected and unfulfilled.

It’s only when love and purpose meet that you experience a marriage that is not only joyful but also God-ordained. So, love and the tendency of your purpose fulfillment have to be found in the person you’re choosing for marriage.

Shalom.