How to Fight Fair and Still Hold Hands After

Reading Time: 2 minutes

How to Fight Fair and Still Hold Hands After

Are you a minister, pastor, church worker, or leader, and you live in Ibadan? You are cordially invited to “Equip” a Minister’s Conference with Rev Femi Oduwole and Rev Gbeminiyi Eboda as part of our 9th anniversary convention.

Rev Dunamis and Sophia Okunowo will also be hosting us. Attendance is free, but registration is required. Kindly register HERE

Don’t miss it. Spread the word!

Every healthy relationship has conflict. Yes — even the godly ones. Even the mature ones. And even the “we finish each other’s sentences” ones.

The difference between couples who grow stronger and those who grow bitter isn’t the absence of fights. It’s simply how they fight.

Here’s how to fight fair — and still hold hands after:

1. Don’t aim to win; aim to understand.

If your goal is to “win” the argument, someone else has to lose. And when your partner loses, your relationship loses. (LOL)

Ask more questions. Don’t assume. Clarify things. Aim to understand.

2. Watch your tone, not just your words.

Saying “What did you say?” can mean five different things depending on how your eyebrows are positioned.

Tone creates safety — or shuts it down. Use it wisely.

How to Fight Fair and Still Hold Hands After

3. No name-calling. No character assassination.

You can challenge a behaviour without attacking their identity.

“Leaving your clothes everywhere frustrates me” is not the same as “You’re so lazy.”

4. Take breaks if needed; but don’t disappear.

If things get too heated, say, “Can we pause and talk when we’re both calmer?”

Storming out or going silent for days creates fear, not resolution.

5. Pray together, even if it’s awkward.

Nothing humbles a tense heart like holding hands and saying, “God, help us.”

While conflict invites pride, prayer invites peace.

6. Make up well.

Say “I’m sorry” without excuses. Hug. Talk through what you’ve both learned. Then move on. Don’t keep recycling the same argument.

Conflict doesn’t have to end in cold shoulders and quiet dinners.

It can end with better understanding, deeper connection… and yes, still holding hands.

And remember, love isn’t proven by how sweet your date nights are. It’s proven by how kind you are in the middle of a disagreement.

Shalom.

How to Fight Fair and Still Hold Hands After