How Men Can Handle Their Fiancée’s Insecurities Before Marriage
1. Reassure Her Constantly
Insecurity often grows where there’s uncertainty. Be intentional about reassuring her of your love and commitment. Tell her often that she’s important to you, not just in words but through actions.
Perfect love casts out fear. — 1 John 4:18
When love is expressed genuinely, it helps silence her fears.
2. Be Consistent and Transparent
Avoid giving mixed signals. Consistency builds trust. Keep your promises, show up when you say you will, and be open about your friendships, plans, and priorities.
If she doesn’t have to guess where she stands with you, her insecurity will begin to fade.
3. Listen to Her Feelings Without Judging
Don’t dismiss her insecurities as “drama” or “immaturity.” Listen to understand, not to argue. Many women just want to be heard and understood.
Ask, “What makes you feel this way?” — and truly pay attention.
Empathy disarms insecurity faster than correction.
4. Set Clear Boundaries With Other Women
Respect builds safety. Let her see that she’s the only woman who has your emotional attention. Avoid flirty or secretive behavior with other women, especially online.
Abstain from all appearance of evil. — 1 Thessalonians 5:22
Protecting her heart from doubt is part of loving her well.
5. Help Her Grow in Her Identity in Christ
Encourage her to see herself the way God sees her — loved, chosen, and valuable. Pray with her and speak life over her.
Send her a scripture or affirmation like, “You are fearfully and wonderfully made” (Psalm 139:14).
Remind her that her worth isn’t based on comparison or fear but on God’s love.
6. Be Patient as She Heals
Insecurity may come from past heartbreak, rejection, or low self-esteem. Don’t get frustrated if she’s not “fixed” quickly. Healing takes time, and your steady love can help her bloom.
Love is patient, love is kind…— 1 Corinthians 13:4
Before marriage, your role is to create an atmosphere of trust, love, and spiritual growth. If both of you overcome insecurities before saying “I do,” you’ll build a stronger, more secure foundation for your future home.
In today’s busy world—between work, children, and other responsibilities—it’s easy for marriage to slip into the background. Yet, God designed marriage as a covenant relationship, not just a partnership of convenience. One of the greatest gifts you can give your husband is to prioritize him, making him feel loved, valued, and respected.
When you prioritize your husband, you are not only honoring him but also honoring God’s design for marriage. A husband who feels loved and valued will pour that same love back into the home, creating a godly atmosphere where both can thrive.
When a wife chooses to put her husband in his rightful place—after God and before every other human relationship—she strengthens the marriage bond, fosters peace in the home, and reflects God’s heart for unity. As Scripture says, “Therefore shall a man leave his father and his mother, and shall cleave unto his wife: and they shall be one flesh” (Genesis 2:24). To “cleave” means to hold fast and give each other priority.
6 Practical Steps to Prioritize Your Husband
1. Put God First, Then Your Husband
When God is first in your life, you’ll naturally know how to love your husband well. After God, your husband should come before children, work, or friends.
But I would have you know, that the head of every man is Christ; and the head of the woman is the man… (1 Corinthians 11:3).
2. Respect Him in Words and Actions
Respect is one of the deepest needs of a man. Speak well of him in private and public. Avoid comparing him to others, and instead, celebrate his strengths.
Nevertheless let every one of you in particular so love his wife even as himself; and the wife see that she reverence her husband. (Ephesians 5:33).
3. Create Time for Him
Don’t let your schedule push him to the side. Intentionally carve out moments for just the two of you—whether it’s talking, praying together, or going on a walk.
To every thing there is a season, and a time to every purpose under the heaven. (Ecclesiastes 3:1).
4. Support His Vision and Dreams
Show interest in what matters to him—his career, ministry, goals, and even hobbies. Be his biggest encourager.
Two are better than one; because they have a good reward for their labour. (Ecclesiastes 4:9).
5. Meet His Emotional and Physical Needs
Every husband longs for companionship, affection, and intimacy. Be attentive to his needs and freely give love.
Let the husband render unto the wife due benevolence: and likewise also the wife unto the husband. (1 Corinthians 7:3).
6. Pray Consistently for Him
One of the greatest priorities you can show is lifting your husband before God daily. Prayer strengthens him, blesses your marriage, and deepens your bond.
The effectual fervent prayer of a righteous man availeth much. (Js 5:16)
When you prioritize your husband, you are not only honoring him but also honoring God’s design for marriage. A husband who feels loved and valued will pour that same love back into the home, creating a godly atmosphere where both can thrive.
One of the weapons the devil uses against many homes and marriages is offence.
Husbands and wives are usually different because opposite will always attract. So maturity is practically handling whatever disrupt the unity in marriage.
Here are 5 ways you can start to use now to get you out of every form of offence.
1. Identify and Name the Trigger
Keep a small “trigger journal” for a week. Each time someone’s words affect your mood, write:
– What was said
– Who said it
– How did it make you feel
This helps you spot patterns — sometimes it’s not what is said, but how you interpret it.
2. Pause Before Reacting
When someone’s words sting, give yourself a 10-second mental buffer.
In that pause, ask: “Is this about me, or is it about them?”
Often, people’s words reveal their state of mind, not your worth.
3. Reframe the Words
Instead of taking the statement as an attack, reinterpret it in a less harmful way.
Example: If someone says, “You’re always late,” you might reframe it to, “They value punctuality, and I can work on timing.”
This isn’t about excusing rudeness — it’s about protecting your peace.
4. Strengthen Your Emotional Filters
Just like a house needs a strong door to keep out intruders, your heart needs a filter to keep out unnecessary offense.
Daily affirmations help here. Example:
– “I choose not to take offense today.”
– “My worth is not decided by anyone’s opinion.”
This slowly rewires how much power people’s words have over you.
5. Practice Mood Recovery
Even if words hurt, you can shorten how long you stay moody by:
– Stepping away to breathe deeply for 3–5 minutes.
– Listening to music that lifts you.
– Reciting a favorite scripture (e.g., “Great peace have they which love thy law: and nothing shall offend them.” – Psalm 119:165
Try these steps and trust God for a better version of you this week.
Are you a minister, pastor, church worker, or leader who lives in Ibadan? You are cordially invited to “Equip” a Minister’s Conference with Rev Femi Oduwole and Rev Gbeminiyi Eboda as part of our 9th anniversary convention.
Rev Dunamis and Sophia Okunowo will also be hosting us. Attendance is free, but registration is required. Kindly register HERE
Don’t miss it. Spread the word!
Love in relationships can sometimes feel like a fire that’s burning low. Life, stress, busyness, or misunderstandings can make the spark fade. But the good news is—fire can be rekindled. Here’s how:
1. Talk, Don’t Assume
Sometimes, all you need is a real conversation. Share your feelings—honestly but kindly. Ask your partner how they’re feeling, too. Silence can kill love, but open communication can bring it back to life.
2. Do the Little Things Again
Remember when you used to say “I love you” more, send sweet messages, or hold hands? Start doing those things again. Small acts can reignite big feelings.
3. Spend Quality Time Together
Make time for just the two of you. No phones, no work, no distractions. Go on a walk, a date, or just talk on the couch. Being together builds connection.
4. Forgive and Let Go
Unforgiveness is like a wall between hearts. If there’s hurt, talk about it and work on healing. Love grows when you release the past.
5. Pray Together
Invite God into your relationship. Praying together helps you feel closer and rebuilds unity.
6. Be Kind on Purpose
Speak gently. Be patient. Show love even when you don’t feel like it. Love is not just a feeling—it’s a choice you make every time.
Love is not lost—it may just need a little attention, care, and warmth. Don’t give up. The fire can burn bright again if you both keep tending to it.
Are you a minister, pastor, church worker, or leader who lives in Ibadan? You are cordially invited to “Equip” a Minister’s Conference with Rev Femi Oduwole and Rev Gbeminiyi Eboda as part of our 9th anniversary convention.
Rev Dunamis and Sophia Okunowo will also be hosting us. Attendance is free, but registration is required. Kindly register HERE
Don’t miss it. Spread the word!
1. Respect His Role
Acknowledge his position as the leader of the home, not because he’s perfect, but because it’s God’s order.
“Wives, submit yourselves unto your own husbands, as unto the Lord.” Ephesians 5:22
2. Speak Kindly and With Respect
Use respectful words and tone when speaking to him or about him, even when you’re correcting or disagreeing.
3. Appreciate His Efforts
Say “thank you” often – for providing, protecting, leading, and trying his best.
4. Support His Decisions
Even if you have your views, allow him to lead and trust his judgment. Please share your thoughts, but don’t override him.
Practical Ways To Honor The Man
5. Pray for Him Daily
Cover him in prayer. A man carries weight you may never fully see. Prayer shows you value and support him.
6. Don’t Compete With Him
Don’t try to take over his role or constantly challenge his leadership. Work with him, not against him.
7. Celebrate Him Publicly and Privately
Praise him before the children, friends, and family. Speak highly of him, not down.
8. Seek His Input Before Big Decisions
Let him know you value his opinion. Don’t just inform him—include him.
9. Be His Peace, Not His Stress
Let home be a safe place. Choose patience and understanding instead of nagging or criticizing.
10. Believe in Him
Even when he’s not there yet, show that you trust in who he is becoming.
These small actions speak volumes and help build a healthy, respectful, and loving relationship in which both partners thrive.
