Believe me, all these contribute to the total well-being of a good marriage. But they can’t do all these when there are people living with them observing every move they make with critical eyes and breathing down their necks. They need that free space before the children start coming.
In those foundational years, the couple needs to become friends. What do friends do? They talk. They communicate. Study yourselves, Discuss temperamental differences. Watch Television together. Play games on your laptops together in your free time.
Dear wife, study your husband’s likes. Make up your mind to fall in love with what he loves. If he is a football lover, start watching football. This is the only way he won’t leave you at home to go and watch football with his friends outside.
Study his passion. Be passionate with his passion! Don’t feel left out when he buries his head in his laptop, iPad, etc. Join him and pad the iPad together! That’s the secret!
Dear husband, your immediate family which is made up of you and your wife is more important than any other in this world. You have the responsibility to protect it.
Don’t turn your newly wedded wife into a cook, because she has to cook for cousins, brothers, etc! The wife is not a professional cook or dry-cleaner who cooks from morning till night catering for the husband’s three brothers and mother from the village!
That is not healthy for any marriage! Sometimes, this is in addition to her career! And then, you wonder why she is always tired when you get to bed.
Give her quality time. Study her love language. Give her listening time. When she is talking, maintain eye to eye contact, and be involved even when she is discussing illogical things. Just listen and you won’t lose her to moods and depression.
Tomorrow, we will continue the series on Relationship and Marriage Killers.
CONFESSION FOR THE DAY I am full of wisdom to fulfill my role in my marriage. My marriage is kept by God’s power. My marriage will not turn into hardship. I am helped of God. I am directed by the Spirit of God.
PRAYERS FOR THE DAY Lord, open the eyes of my understanding as regards my relationships and marriage and fill me with the Spirit id wisdom.
THOUGHT FOR THE DAY Bless your fresh-flowing fountain! Enjoy the wife you married as a young man! –Proverbs 5:18 (MSG)
ACTION PLAN FOR THE DAY Follow the suggestions above
What does it mean to be chosen? The word “chosen” signifies being set apart for a reason.
How are people chosen? People are chosen on account of certain attributes they have. Things like a good character, telling the truth, humility and discipline make people to be chosen.
Let’s look at the verse in Jeremiah 1:5
“Before I made you in your mother’s womb, I chose you. Before you were born, I set you apart for a special work. I appointed you as a prophet to the nations.” – Jeremiah 1:5 ICB
This was God speaking to the prophet Jeremiah. The Lord chose Jeremiah to speak to the children of Israel. These people were very stubborn and disobeyed God many times. God sent Jeremiah to them with warnings to turn from their wayward ways.
Look at the first part of the verse–Before I made you in your mother’s womb, I chose you…
God created everyone and before we were even put in our mother’s womb. You were already alive before God put you in her womb.
God has seen everything about you and decided to call you for His own. That’s why He chose you for that.
If God chooses you to do something, it means you are very special to Him. That there is a particular work God has for you.
Look well at this verse and meditate on it. Declare it over and over, personalize the words and believe.
There is something special about you and God wants to use the special gift He has given you for the good of His kingdom here on earth.
Today I will like to do a father-to-child conversation with you. There are lots of things missing in this generation’s relationship life. As much as I wouldn’t be able to capture everything, I believe that you can get something from what I am about to tell you.
Be sincere, as singles in courtship, are you really in the relationship for the long haul or you are just looking for temporary pleasure? Are you being sincere with him or her? Are you sure you are not just leading her on?
Are you confident to say your motive is not the money you can get? Do you really love him or her? Are you protecting her or exploiting her emotions? Do you have some self-control? Can you delay gratification?
That is what separates the boys from the men and the sisters from ‘sistos!’ Are you sure you are not double-dating? Do you realize that when you are double-dating, you are already given to lying and deceptive spirits?
As a single brother or sister who is not in any relationship, are you preparing yourself? How many books have you read to prepare you? Who is your mentor? Who are you accountable to? Are you serving God with your time? Have you dealt with negative self-esteem issues? Are you really single and complete?
These things are the foundation of a good relationship, but it seems old fashion in today’s relationships.
To my dear singles, who are courting, who are you accountable to? Are you really open and truthful to your mentor?
While a lot of people might get to know that you are in a relationship; it’s ok for them to know about who you are going out with, you are only obligated to the person that you consider as a spiritual authority who you can confide in. He is the person you must see whenever you have issues beyond you. It is wrong to report your fiancée or fiancé all over the place. Be accountable to only one person, two at the most, that both of you respect.
Imagine reporting your partner to one of your friends who is not yet in any relationship. What kind of advice do you think he/she will give you?
As singles in courtship, it is wrong to stay over the night in your fiancé’s house. There is no dignity in that. You went to greet him in another city and then he comes up with the card that he doesn’t know any other person you can stay within the whole city?
That is the more reason you should be cautious of such a person because that is an obvious relationship dysfunction. Do not shoot yourself in the leg.
Avoid compromise because every compromise is a legal invitation to the devil to come and wreck that relationship. When you give the devil an inch, he will take a mile!
Stay clean. Stay chaste! Stay with God and you will laugh last!
CONFESSION FOR THE DAY My marriage will be a blessing
PRAYERS FOR THE DAY Oh Lord, do a miracle in my life today.
THOUGHT FOR THE DAY Marriage is honourable in all, and the bed undefiled: but whoremongers and adulterers God will judge. – Heb 13:4 (KJV)
ACTION PLAN FOR THE DAY Put the above points to use.
There are several factors that could literally put an end to a marriage.
The first in the series of marriage killers we will be looking at is Home Invaders. I always counsel newly married couples – Don’t allow anybody to come and live with you when you are newly married, be it cousins, brothers, sisters, mother or father.
If you want to help your folk, and you should help them, you can make provision for them without necessarily their coming to stay with you. How I wish newly married couples can lend their ears to this wisdom.
This is because the newly wedded couple needs as much privacy as possible to be alone and to discover themselves. They don’t need any distractions in those foundational years, especially the first five years.
They need to focus on God and themselves. If a young couple can focus on God and themselves in the first few years, they would have established a solid foundation that will withstand any marital storm or wind that may come.
Let thy fountain be blessed: and rejoice with the wife of thy youth. – Proverbs 5:18 (KJV)
They don’t need anything that might trigger inhibitions in their sexual life. They don’t need anybody to complain about the wife’s inability to cook well or the husband’s uncaring attitude.
Two is a good company, three is a crowd. They don’t need somebody to critique the stew and how the meat didn’t collide well with the catfish.
The young wife needs to focus her love and respect on her husband and she does not need all the additional emotional upheavals and pressures that are often engendered when she has a lot of people to attend to.
They should be left alone to discover themselves. They should be free to walk around their house naked, play together, jump on themselves and have a lot of fun together.
To be continued…
CONFESSION FOR THE DAY I am full of wisdom to fulfill my role in my marriage.
PRAYERS FOR THE DAY Lord, open the eyes of my understanding as regards my marriage and fill me with the Spirit of wisdom.
THOUGHT FOR THE DAY Bless your fresh-flowing fountain! Enjoy the wife you married as a young man! –Proverbs 5:18 (MSG)
ACTION PLAN FOR THE DAY Follow the suggestions above
Hi champ! It’s another time to learn from God’s word. It’s always awesome to know what God thinks and says about you, isn’t it? Do you ever feel alone?
Let’s look at this amazing topic today!
Do you ever feel alone? As a child there were times I felt alone and wanted someone to just seat all day and talk to. Well I didn’t always get the attention.
How about you? Are there times you wished someone really understood how tiring school work is and just hold you and pamper you? I know that feeling!
See what the bible says:
…I am with you always, even unto the end of the world. Amen. Matthew 28:18b (KJV)
These are Jesus’ very words! How comforting is this?
In this very verse, Jesus was about ascending into the heavens after he had resurrected, and he made this promise to his disciples and friends.
Guess what? This means he was also talking to you as long as you are his friend and disciple.
Are you a child of God? Are you a disciple and friend of Jesus? If yes, be sure that he is with you always, even until the end of the world.
This I want you to always remember that he is always with you until the end of time.
You don’t have to be scared of anything, you know why? Jesus is always with you, not for one minute will he leave your side for any reason.
See how another translation puts it;
I am with you all the days (perpetually, uniformly, and on every occasion), to the [very] close and consummation of the age. Amen (so let it be). –Matthew 28:18 (AMP)
Always live in this reality and rest in the assurance that Jesus is always with you.
Prayer: Lord, help me to remember that you are with me always; Amen.
Action plan: Write down this verse and memorize it.
